The Importance Of Trust

Chapter 5

"Jackson Avery!" Owen yelled out of disbelief at Cristina after dragging her into an on-call room. "Jackson Avery!"

"Do you want to explain to Bailey why I am ignoring her page?" Cristina yanked her arm out of Owen's hand once the on-call room's door closed.

"A date?" Owen yelled in disbelief.

"It is not a date!" Cristina yelled back.

"When did you kiss him?"

"I didn't kiss him. And seriously I would shut up right now, if I were you, because you have no earthy idea what you're talking about." Cristina tried to lower her voice as she talked, but the attempt failed as strain continued to hurt her throat. "I am not going on a date with Jackson. I owe him drink and as I feel like a drink tonight and you can't go out drinking with me because of your pain meds, I -"

"Don't you put this on me," Owen argued.

"How many times did you go out for a drink with Teddy?" Cristina argued back.

Owen froze "How do you-"

"Joe is a friend of mine."

"Cristina..."

"You are such a hypocrite." Cristina stated. "You expect to be able to go have drinks with a woman who tells you she loves you and you clearly have some type of feelings for," Owen tried to speak but Cristina put her hand up to silence him. "But you think that when I go out for drinks with a friend that saved your life and everybody's lives in that O.R. – including mine – that it's somehow different?"

To that, Owen had nothing to say. His mind was still trying (or not trying) to picture Cristina and Jackson together, wondering how he could have missed it.

"And, besides, we not even together right now, Owen."

"Yes, yes, we are," Owen started. "I know I messed up, but I came back for you, I chose you," Owen reached for Cristina, starring deeply into her eyes. "I am completely in love with you."

"You expect to be able to treat me like crap, cheating on me for months, and then expect that say these magic words to put us back together. It doesn't quite work that way."

"I did not cheat on you, Cristina. Ever. You are the one that's kissing other people."

"Emotionally cheating is the same as, or worse, than physically cheating in my book," Cristina crossed her arms and gave Owen a cold stare. "And for the last time I did cheat on you with Jackson."

"Derek said-" Owen started angrily.

"Ok. Stop!" Cristina yelled, pulling Owen's arms to his side away from her. "Just Stop! This is insane. We're not teenagers, you can stop yelling at me." Cristina sat down on the bed in the on-call room, putting her hands over her face in order to calm down. Cristina could feel Owen sit down beside her.

"I'm sorry," Owen said.

"For what?" Cristina was finally able to bring her voice down to a whisper.

"I am sorry for everything that's been going on with Teddy. The PTSD has been messing with my head and I am sorry I haven't been able to talk to you about."

Cristina's doubts were obvious in her silent.

"But now I know," Owen started. "I know I'm in love with you. I chose you. I know I am late, I know. But you have to know that I'm done. You're it for me."

"I have heard this before," Cristina whispered, paused, and then said: "I'm such an idiot."

"No, no you aren't Cristina." Owen said. "I am."

"I'm an idiot. Meredith told me something was going on and I laughed in her face. Like she was so full of crap, I trusted you…actually you and Teddy enough to think that idea was laughable. I am such an idiot."

"You were right to have trusted us. We messed up, not you."

"Okay. Whatever."

"No. Not whatever, Cristina." Owen's frustration was all over his face as he reached for her again, gently putting his hand on her face and pulling it towards him. This time Cristina did not pull away and their eyes met. "Not whatever," Owen repeated.

Cristina brought her face close to his, their lips almost touching, before Cristina moved to rest her forehead on his good shoulder. Owen bent his head down to her neck, kissing the side of it, and putting his good arm around her.

They stayed in the same position for a long time, pulling each other closer and closer.

Cristina struggled with her doubts and fears as she stayed in his arms. She could not help them from building higher and higher in her head. She had to pull back.

Owen adjusted from his arms being emptied to look at her. He couldn't have enough of her. He could breathe in her in for hours.

"What is going to be different this time, Owen?"

Her question surprised him. "Everything is going to be different this time, Cristina. I have learned so much about you since the merger, and I am looking forward to learning more and accepting every part of you. We are going to move in together and-"

"No, no," Cristina cut him off quietly. "Not between us. I meant, what is going to be different this time between you and Teddy?"

Cristina's question caught Owen so off-guard that for a moment he couldn't even form the words to try and give her an answer.

Cristina continued in his confusion. "I mean, from where I'm standing you guys tried not talking to each other and that didn't work. Then you tried being friends, and it seems like that didn't work either…" Cristina trailed off. "Is there something else to try?"

Owen brought his hands to her shoulders and looked at her sadly.

"We-you-need to figure this out, Owen. She is still going to be in this hospital. You are going to see her every day…" She trailed off again.

Frustration filled Cristina. He is not allowed to be silent right now.

"So," Cristina said harshly, "What is going to be different between you and Teddy this time?"

Owen was only silent for a second more as he regained composure.

"The difference now between Teddy and me is that she finally accepted that we, you and me, are together."

"She has said this before," Cristina argued a little, but wanted to believe him.

"No, Cristina. She really accepted that we are together. Even when we were trying to be friends and to un-ring the bell, she never really accepted it. She kept fighting for me. But now, she told wouldn't anymore."

"When did she tell you this?"

"Yesterday. She could tell when we got out of the hospital, that I was going to go back in for you. She blocked the police officer for me so that I could pass them and run into to find you."

Cristina closed her eyes and then they widen in disbelief. She let out a deep breath and said, "Really?"

"Really, Cristina. It's over. I'm sorry it ever-" Cristina put her hand over his mouth.

"I've heard you apologize enough." She smiled, kissed his check, and put her arms around him. "I love you so much," she added.

Those words flooded into Owen like ice water on a hot day. "I love you more," He responded into her neck. His good arm went completely around her as he kissed her neck once, twice, and a third time before laying her down on the bed.

Both their pagers went off at once.

"Damn it!" Owen exclaimed.

Both of them rose from the bed, and as Cristina put her hand on the doorknob to leave, Owen put his arm around her once more.

"I'll see you night?" Owen hopefully asked.

"Owen…" Cristina hesitated. "I told him I would go…" She regrettably said.

"Yeah, yeah, that's fine," Owen said casually. "Afterwards. I mean, are you going to spend the night with Meredith or…" Owen paused, "I know there a lot we have to talk about before…but…" He trailed off, hoping his silence would speak for itself.

Cristina smiled, "I will see you tonight." Cristina kissed his check as she left the room.