I drove not really paying attention to where just letting my hands take control. I soon realized where i was going when i passed the Welcome to Forks sign. I didn't slowed though. I only took more care of where i drove and who saw me. I parked in a secluded area and got out. It was the middle of the night and the streets were empty. I walked slowly looking around. There was a small tug at my heart has i passed my school.
I took a shaky breath.
There was something i wanted to see. Though first i need to check on somebody...
"Charlie" i breath as i stood at the edge of the woods behind his house. I took the few steps that brought me to his front door. I frown. I wasn't going to knock. That would wake him up and that wasn't something i wanted to happen. So instead i climb my way up the side of the house and went in through my window. I pushed the thoughts that told me i wasn't the first vampire to do that. I listen then. I was a little confused.
The only scent around were weeks if not months old. There wasn't a heart beat coming from the room next door or the living room downstairs. I slowly open my door and went outside. I checked everything and was shocked at what i saw. The kitchen had been cleaned out. Nothing was left not even the refrigerator or stove.
The living room was empty too. The huge TV Charlie had bought was missing so was any furniture. I ran to his room and gasped when i saw it. Nothing was there. Not a bed or any clothing of his. I checked everything in the house. Charlie's fishing gear was gone. So was any kind of things a human would need such has tooth paste, food, the electricity and water had even been turn off.
What happen here? i thought. I sat on the bed in my room. That was the only thing that hadn't been removed. I looked around. Nothing had been taken of even moved from this room. Yet everything else had disappeared.
What had happen here that made Charlie take all his things away? Had he moved? Did he just get rob? I stood and walked outside. I stood at the edge of the woods when i heard a car pull up. I almost choked on my sobs when i saw who came out. Jacob and Billy sat in the front seats. His faces were layered with pain and grief.
Jake helped Billy out and they went inside. I listen hard and payed attention to every word they spoke.
"its been a while" Billy said quietly. I could almost see Jake nodding.
"are you OK?" Billy asked
"y-yeah i just miss them" Jake whispered
"we all do" Billy grunted
"yeah i guess so"
"are you ready?"
"no" Jake's answer was choked but was said quickly.
"we have to clean everything out Jacob... Charlie wanted everything to be sold and the money to be given to Renee"
I frown. Why would Charlie sale everything he own? Had the pain of loosing his only daughter change him and want to move or something? I was completely lost.
"but her room Dad... we can't just pick everything that she own and sale it!" I was surprise at Jake's tone. It sounded much more angry then i remember. Even if he was a werewolf. I froze has that thought hit me. Jake was a werewolf and i was a vampire. His natural enemy. What would happen when he caught my scent in the hou-
"somebody has been here" Jake's voice interrupted my thoughts and froze me even further. "a freaking leech" he hissed. I heard stomping. He was probably running upstairs. "it was in Bella's room dad! It sat in her bed!" I could almost imagine him shaking.
"Can't they just respect Bella's memory or even Charlie's" I almost crumble at Jake's words.
Charlie's memory?
Did could only mean...
Charlie was dead!
My father was dead...
"Jake wait!" My eyes snapped to Jake he was jumping off my window. His expression showed nothing but anger and concentration. He was following my trail i suddenly realized. I took off then i couldn't have Jacob see me like i was right now. I didn't pay attention to where i was running but soon i realized. The grave yard held all of people's grief for their lost loved ones.
I slowly walked over and looked at every tomb stone. I found my dad's easily. It was in the corner of the cemetery.
Charlie Swan
Great Father, Great Husband, Great Friend
I fell on my knees sobbing.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry daddy" i cried. I wrapped my arms around my torso trying to keep it from falling to pieces. I did this to him i killed him. I killed my own father. When i had lied i thought i was just hurting the Cullens but i was wrong i was hurting so many people. Friends, family, everyone that ever meant something to me i had hurt. I was a monster.
"Bella" i froze. My sobs stopped. I couldn't move. I couldn't breath. Slowly so slowly that i looked like a weak human i stood up and turned around slowly. He stood there watching me with dead eyes. His face showed nothing but his eyes told me all the pain he was in. Why was he here? Why was my life so complicated? Why?
"Edward?" i breath
IMPORTANT-This is from Edward's point of view its a few months after Bella left sorry i would have loved for you guys to read what happen next but i felt this was necessary so just enjoy people!
EPOV
Bella... her memory wouldn't leave my head. It felt like it was permanently glued to my brain. This was one of the few times that i hated my perfect memory. I gasped in pain when i remember her scent...her eyes...her lips. How can someone hurt so much? If a human had felt how i feel they would surely die from the pain.
I had thought that there was no worst pain then when i left her. I was wrong. Bella not loving me that was much more worst then being away from her for a few months. I would have sight in relief if i could exchange thatpain with this one. That was impossible though i was sentence to spent eternity loving someone who didn't love me. Eternity feeling this pain. I would have gone to the Voltury and provoked them but i knew she would pity me enough to stop me.
I wince from the pain in my throat. I hadn't hunted for about two months but that was a good thing. The pain was so strong it almost helped me forget about my aching heart. Almost.
"No Jasper" Alice suddenly whispered
"i have to Alice I'm sorry i can't handle it anymore...I'm sorry" I looked through Alice's mind. Jasper was walking through the back door. He was...leaving. Was this what it has come to? My family running away from me? Alice quickly ran after him. Esme put all her will into not crying.
What was i doing? I was hurting my family and over what? A human (now vampire) who didn't love me.
Its more then that! she was everything! she was perfect and you let her go! why didn't you at least try to find something to offer her to make her stay! She was an angel! And you're a monster!
I shudder. I was a monster. She was perfect. That was something even a moron could see. I didn't know for how long i staid in my room. I lost count of the hours, days, weeks,...
Jasper came back after a while with Alice. He staid away from me though. Which was pretty easy i didn't come out my room for anything. The slight shuffling of feet warn me someone was coming. However i didn't act on it. I didn't look who's mind it was. It didn't matter anymore... I didn't matter anymore.
Emmett walked in and frown when he saw me. I imagine how i must look to him. Emmett had always looked at mein a brotherly. Even though he was physically older then me he always looked at me with the eyes of a younger brother. To him i was sometimes that man/vampire who nobody could control. The vampire who did what he wanted but still acted responsible. The vampire who couldn't be beaten.
When he looked at me right now he saw a lifeless man in the corner of a room rocking back and forth. A man who had lost his purpose. He saw a vampire who had lost a mate and it hit him...i wasn't invincible.
"Edward?" he asked quietly
I didn't answer.
"Edward?" he asked again taking a step towards me.
I didn't answer. His frown deepen has he sat besides me.
"I know it hurts" I wince "but you can't keep doing this to yourself! Have you even been attention? Have you? Did you noticed how Alice doesn't shop anymore? How Rose wouldn't even go near a car's engine? How Carisle cowards away in the hospital? Esme can barley go a day without crying! and Jasper... well most of the time he isn't even here because he can't stand our emotions"
He was screaming this in his head. When he saw that i wasn't reacting he got angry but he was even more disappointed has he left.
Yes they were all hurting. For the first Time Carisle didn't know what to do and coward in the hospital. Taking extra shifts and only coming home when he absolutely needed to. Alice now spent most of her time trying to sooth Jasper. He didn't know how to deal with our pain and grief. It didn't help that he also was in pain because of Bella's departure. Esme just right now started crying again. She couldn't stop loving Bella and she hated herself for it. When she hears me take a deep breath she wants to hate Bella for hurting me but she just can't.
Rosalie...well she just was hurting because the rest of us were. She didn't miss Bella she just wanted her family back.
Emmett...was not himself. He was a serious thoughtful Emmett. It hurt Rosalie to see him this way. He hadn't smiled since that awful day. Neither had i...
Months passed...i guess i could tell by the burn in my throat.
"Edward" i hadn't even heard Jasper coming. I didn't answer just kept my eyes on the floor. He sat besides me and took a deep breath.
"what I'm going to tell you is not to get your hopes high Edward its a...,...theory. Answer me this question. Have you even thought what happen in those five minutes that Alec took our senses away?"
I couldn't see where this was going but i tried to answer him. All i could manage was a small shake of my head. Jasper was ecstatic. He had been the first to actually get me to response to them.
"well think about it Edward... Bella used to be...a very protective person. Remember how she almost got killed by James because she thought he had her mother and thought the only way to protect Renee was to sacrifice herself. She was willing to die for her family."
"we weren't her family Jasper she just used us" i spoke for the first time in months. He shook his head
"Nobody can manipulate their emotions like that Edward even if what she said was true. i would have detected something when we were in Phoenix or when she spent nights over here but i didn't she...,...,...,..,lied to you"
I could feel myself listen to him. A small glint of hope sparked inside of me. I turned my head towards him motioning for him to continue.
"Maybe they threaten her. Face it she knew very little of the Voltury. What if they told her that they would kill you or Alice if she didn't go with them-"
"they can't do that. They can't just kill someone" i interrupted him.
"did she know that?"
"No" i was force to say the truth. Bella didn't know the rules the Voltury had to followed.
"she could have been protection you Edward...she could have been protecting us. When she left there was pain coming from her Edward. A lot of pain. Maybe even more then what your feeling right now"
I wince once again.
"how can i be sure Jasper? How can i be sure that she lied...or that she didn't" I asked desperate to hear more of his insight.
"look for her" Jasper left he was planing on visiting Maria with Alice Rosalie Emmett and Bree.
Jasper's answer sounded simple. It wasn't. I knew where she was. She was in Italy... in Volterra. The problem was if she would let me ask. Even if she did let me me ask how was i gonna get the truth when Aro and Jane were so close?
How was i going to get Bella to be truthful to me without her having to be scared about the consequences?
I lean my head against the wall. Jasper Alice Rosalie Emmett and Bree had been gone for hours! How was i suppose to do this? Where would i even start? The phone ringing caught my attention.
"Hello Tanya" Esme answer from downstairs.
"Oh my god that's wonderful!" Esme trilled. I looked in her mind to hear that the Voltury had let Irina visit Tanya and Kate.
"Oh please let me talk to her" a second passed before Esme spoke again.
"Irina dear are you OK?" There was a short pause and then Esme's mind went blank. Then i was hit with everything. Bella has escorted Irina to Alazka. Aro didn't trust Irina to just let her go. Bella had left Irina in her home and then left. I was off the floor and down the stairs. I yanked the phone away from Esme and spoke into it.
"where did she go Irina?" i asked. There was a slight pause at the other line.
"i don't know Edward truly i don't. She left me here and promise to be back in a few days to take me back to Volterra" Irina's voice was guarded.
I couldn't wait a few days! I had to see her now!
"thank you Irina" i said before hanging up.
I had to find Bella! But where would she be? I froze.
Charlie
She would go to check on Charlie since he was so close to Alaska. Though i had heard that Charlie had died so she would be in the...cemetery.
"Esme i have to go to Forks" i said turning to my mother. She nodded hugging me. I left has soon has she release me.
Please Bella please be in Forks i pleaded has i ran has fast has i could to the rainy to.
OMG hope you guys like it. A special thanks to ((((briana37)))) for giving me the idea of Jasper telling Edward Bella was lieing! Anyways this was a chapter i am actually happy about. Hope you guys like it!
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a "dont sound so desperate for reviews" would also be welcome LOL
Anyways love you guys if your looking for other stories to read
STORY OF MY LIFE
FORBIDDEN AND IRRISISTABLE
they are two other stories i'm writing so please check them out!
