A/n: Holy crap Zelda12343 requested a bunch 0.o but being the nice person I am, I will do each thing one at a time, but the one thing she requested that was labled "Something with Aragorn" and "Legolas being more confused for a girl" will be a mix. Anyway, this is the one thing she requested which was "Something with Frodo, Sam and Gollum" so I went a little dirty with this one and made up a dirty reason as to why Gollum was so obbsessed with the ring in the first place. Hope you enjoy it!

My Precious

Frodo, Sam, and Gollum on their way to Mordor decided to set up camp for the night. Once they fonud the right place to settle in for the night and eat their rations they rolled their small blankets and pillows out to tuck in for the night. Sam, looked towards Frodo and smiled at him. "Get your rest Mister Frodo. We have a long journey tomorrow" he said, as sweet as he always was. (Seriously besides the pair Merry and Pippin, Sam is my favorite hobbit for being so sweet)

"Good night, Sam" Frodo said, as he rolled over and tried to go asleep, but the power of the ring was to over powering and he hardly slept at all, but it was a good thing he was. Otherwise he wouldn't have felt the small, gray, slender fingers wrap around the ring that strapped to the chain around his neck and pulled out, Sting the long elven blade and shoved off the offender and pointed the blade at the offender's neck only to see that it was Gollum.

"Gollum? What on earth do you think your doing?" Frodo asked as he pulled the blade back from Gollum's throat. Upon, hearing all the comotion Sam woke up and pulled his small slender knife out of defense.

"Please, don't hurt Smeagol" Gollum or now Smeagol cried out, scared ouf of his wits. "You know you can't have the ring, it must be destroyed to save not only your own madness, but all of middle earth" Sam said, angry at Gollum for even trying such a thing.

"But, but Smeagol needs precious. It calls to Smeagol" he cried out, as she slipped out of Frodo's grasp and back in a crouching position holding himself.

"What draws you to the ring, Gollum?" Sam asked, tilting his head to the side.

"You see, Smeagol doesn't have the looks to get pretty woman" Smeagol asked, shyly.

"What are you saying? You wanted to have the ring to give it to a pretty woman" Frodo asked, confusingly.

"No, Smeagol is pretty ugly" Smeagol asked, as his gaze shifted off to the side and still held himself in his arms.

"Now Gollum...Smeagol I mean, you don't need a golden ring to look great" Frodo said, with a small warm smile on his face.

"No no, Smeagol need ring for...other purposes" Smeagol said, as he grabbed the ring, but didn't tear it from Frodo, instead just twiddled it in his fingers a bit.

"Other purposes?" Frodo questioned, his head tilting to the side.

"What purpose is that, Gollum" Sam asked, as he cocked a brow up.

"Can we just say Smeagol needs an issue of "PlayElf" to enjoy the precious" Smeagol said, as he held up a small magazine up. Frodo looked down at the ring and immediatly new what Gollum meant and took the chain off, handing it to Sam.

"Here, the fate of middle earth is in your hands now" Frodo said, fast. He was sort of freaked out now at what the ring had been through up to the point it landed in his relative's hands. "No no, Master Frodo. This was your fate, you take the ring" Sam said as she shoved the ring away from him back to Frodo.

"No I insist Sam. Something tells me you would do a lot better at defending the very item that can possibly destroy Middle earth" Frodo said, as she shoved the ring back. "Frodo, savior of Middle earth sounds like a good title for you" Sam said as he pushed the ring back and forth. They went on like this for about 2 minutes and then the ring fell into the cracks of the mountain. The crack was big enough for the ring, but not big enough for human, hobbit, elf, dwarf, orc, any kind of fingers out there to retrieve it.

"Gandalf would be so ashamed of me for loosing the ring out of my own disgust" Frodo said, as he huddled in a corner. Sam and Gollum were in their own world as they looked through the pages of "PlayElf" Magazine.

"Hey Mister Frodo, Arwen's in this version. Aragorn and Elrond is going to be angry when he finds out about this" Sam yelled to Frodo.

-the end-

A/N: not a very long one I know, but I had a hard time trying to come up with something for it so I just thought of the one joke I had as to why Smeagol would call the ring his "Precious". And the ending, I still can't get enough over XD. Aragorn will be shitting bricks to find out Arwen was in PlayElf.