A/N: Happy Easter and/or Passover to all who celebrate! Thank you for your lovely reviews and for your patience in waiting for the next chapter. I have a lot going on this year and can't make as much time for writing as I would like. But please don't be afraid each time it takes a few weeks between updates that I must have abandoned this story. Looking back, it seems like a miracle that I was ever able to post once or twice per week. That pace is just not sustainable for me at the moment. I hope you can understand that. :)

Ch 58 – Decisions

"Tony," Angela said, as if trying to argue the point, and in the light of the lamp on his desk, he could see her blush.

"Well, you are," he said, because it was true.

Angela looked down at him, all rosy cheeks and curly blond hair, and his heart squeezed.

"And you're very sweet."

Then the loud rumbling of Angela's stomach interrupted the tender moment between them.

"Sounds like someone's hungry, too." Tony pulled up her zipper as far as he could. "I guess we better find you something to eat."

Letting the tails of her blouse drop, Angela laughed. "Yeah, we better. But first I need to get out of these clothes."

Holding on to her waistband with one hand, she walked towards the door.

"Downstairs in five?" Tony asked, reaching to turn off his desk lamp.

Angela was already halfway through the door before she turned back around and smiled at him over her shoulder.

"Downstairs in five."

ooooooooo

After some leftover pasta had been found and reheated for Angela and she had packed away an impressive portion, she and Tony settled in on the living room couch for a few moments of television before bed.

Jonathan relinquished his position in front of the TV not without some mumbled complaints. But a whole afternoon and evening of playing on the Nintendo was more than enough.

"Good night, darling!" Angela called after him as he trudged up the stairs.

"Good night, b- Jonathan."

"Night!" he shouted from halfway up the stairs.

Tony waited until Jonathan's footsteps disappeared further down the hallway before turning towards Angela.

"You think he's doing alright?" he asked quietly.

"I hope so," she said, looking in the direction of the stairs, and Tony could tell that she was just as worried as him.

He inhaled. "I know you said we should wait until he comes to us, but I'm really not sure. He's home all the time, always in front of the TV or up in his room."

"I know." Angela nodded, biting her bottom lip. "Maybe we should try again."

"I think so, too." Tony was glad that she seemed receptive to the idea. He reached across both of their bodies for Angela's left hand and ran his thumb over the delicate arch of her engagement ring.

"We don't have to make it all about him either," he continued. "I was thinking … maybe it's time we told the kids – and your mother – that I don't work here anymore?" It felt weird to put it like that. "I mean, make it official, you know? That would be a good opportunity to check in with Jonathan. And once the family knows, we can tell the rest of the world."

He felt Angela shift on the couch next to him, moving in closer. "Is that what you want? Tell the rest of the world?" She snuggled her head against his shoulder.

"I'm ready, yeah," Tony said, surprising himself with his degree of conviction. "And to be honest, I kind of want us to … control the narrative here."

Now Angela pulled back a little and looked at him, an almost amused expression on her face. "Control the narrative?"

"Hey! You're not the only one who knows about PR," he retorted, playfully offended, but secretly happy that he had impressed her.

"It would seem so."

She leaned back against the cushions, and Tony gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Mona and I ran into the Barringtons' housekeeper the other day. At the market. Remember her? Frances?"

"How could I forget Frances." Angela's face took on a peculiar expression.

"Yup. She hasn't changed one bit. And she reminded me of something. It's my turn to host the housekeepers' get-together this month."

"Oh."

"I know, I could just cancel, I don't owe them an explanation or whatever. But I guess it gave me the idea that it might make sense to have them over here and tell them the truth. Get ahead of the curve by feeding the gossip mill ourselves."

"Feeding the-"

"The way I see it, people are going to talk anyway, once they find out. I just don't want any weird rumors to start flying around. About what's going on here," Tony clarified.

He interlaced their fingers and drew their hands down to her stomach. The flickering light of the TV caught on Angela's ring.

"I suppose you're right. I'm not going to be able to hide it much longer."

"I wouldn't want you to."

With Angela beginning to show, the pregnancy and the baby-to-be were becoming more and more real to him, and Tony was proud. Not of how he had acted in the past. But of the family they were building, and of the fact that they had managed to turn things around, to step back from the brink that he had maneuvered them to.

Angela squeezed his hand and smiled. That unique, soft smile of hers that seemed to be reserved for the baby. "I don't want there to be any rumors, either."

Tony's heart began to beat faster as he considered the implications of what they had just agreed on. Soon, their friends and neighbors would know. The other parents at school. The housekeepers. It was an exciting step to take, and downright scary.

His immediate impulse was to lean in and seal the deal with a kiss. To his delight, Angela met him halfway, her lips already parted.

ooooooooo

When they pulled back, more than a little reluctantly, Angela cleared her throat.

"But Tony, there is something-" She halted and took her hand from his. "Ah, I probably should have told you about this earlier. And I don't know why I haven't, although I suppose it was because we weren't really talking to each other, and I felt that it wouldn't be-"

"Sweetheart, what is it?" he asked, gently interrupting her. His heart was still beating fast, but for a different reason now.

Angela sat up straighter. "The last time I went to see Dr. Solomon, he talked to me about certain … risks."

"Risks? What risks?" Tony searched her eyes for a clue as to what she was talking about.

"Risks for the baby. Related to my age," she said quietly.

"Oh." Tony cocked his head and tried to catch her eyes. "But I thought- today is twelve weeks, right?"

A small smile flitted across Angela's features. "I didn't know you were counting along."

"Hey, are you kidding? Of course." It was easy – four weeks after the accident. "So … I thought things are safer now?"

Angela nodded. "They are, they are. They absolutely are."

"Okay, good." Tony was relieved. "But then, what is this about?"

Angela didn't look at him. "Dr. Solomon recommended that we have an amniocentesis done. It's- a test where they take some amniotic fluid and check for, ah- chromosomal abnormalities that are more likely in children of women who are, well, older."

Tony felt the palms of his hands grow sweaty. "Abnormalities?" It was less of a question and more of a croak.

"Like Down Syndrome. And a few other things." Angela was still not looking at him.

"Oh." He had had no idea.

"It's not very likely," she said quickly. "But it's also not impossible. I'm almost 40."

Tony nodded, trying to wrap his head around what exactly Angela was telling him here.

"So, Dr. Solomon – did he, I mean, did he see anything? On the ultrasound? And that's why he's suggesting the am- this test?"

Angela shook her head. "No, no. Tony, it's nothing like that. It would be purely as a precaution. They offer it to all women over 35."

"Okay." That was a good to know. But his thoughts were still jumbled.

"And we can absolutely decide against it."

Tony blinked. "But if we have it done, we could be sure, right? That the baby is healthy?"

"Pretty sure, yes."

"And say … we have it done. And we find out that, I mean, what would we- What do people do if-"

People probably did one of two things when they got news like that. Tony thought of the ultrasound picture pinned to the door of the fridge. He couldn't imagine.

Next to him, Angela was wiping at her eyes with shaky fingers. "I don't know."

"Hey, hey. Sweetheart." He reached for her. "We don't have to decide tonight, right?"

Sniffling, Angela shook her head.

"Okay. Come here."

Carefully, he helped Angela straddle his lap. They hadn't done this since before the accident, but Tony figured that his knee would be alright, and he needed to hold her close right now.

Mindful of her ribs, Angela slowly let herself sink forward into his embrace, and Tony cherished feeling her weight on his thighs and against his chest. He reached around and let his hands describe slow circles on her lower back, hoping to help her calm down.

"I don't want you to worry about stuff like that all by yourself," he whispered into the crook of her neck.

Angela exhaled, and little by little, he could feel the tension leave her body. She had to have been thinking about this for weeks.

"We're in this together, remember?" He continued to caress her. "No matter what."

ooooooooo

"I don't know, Angela."

It was Saturday morning, and Tony put down the well-worn brochure that she had handed him after the kids had left the breakfast table. All the medical terminology, the illustrations and the percentages were not sitting well with him.

Angela was holding on to her mug of tea with both hands, giving him a look that seemed to mirror how he felt.

"I never even thought about any of this." He pointed at the brochure.

Angela smiled ruefully. "We were both a lot younger when we had Jonathan and Samantha."

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry I didn't talk to you earlier," she said, for the fifth or sixth time since last night.

"Hey, come on now. It's like I said, no need to apologize. It's been a wild couple of weeks." Tony gave her a poignant look and hoped that that would settle the matter once and for all.

"So, what do you think?" she asked eventually.

Tony sighed. "One in a hundred, that's not nothing." He was referring to the risk of miscarriage associated with any amniocentesis.

"I know," Angela said softly. "But I trust Dr. Solomon. Unless you would prefer it if we didn't do anything?" Her eyebrows were raised in an expression that Tony couldn't quite read.

He didn't know the man, but he didn't have any reason not to trust him. Angela did, and that should be enough for him. Still, he felt uneasy.

"I mean, that's how it used to be for all of history, right? You have a baby and hope for the best?" He took a sip of his coffee.

At least that was how it had been when he and Marie were expecting Sam. And he had never heard of any of the women in Brooklyn going in for risky tests like that. Test that could have all kinds of outcomes. Not even when they were having 'late-in-life babies', as Mrs. Rossini and her friends liked to say.

Then again, not many of the women in Brooklyn had been in the habit of talking to him about what went on at their doctor's appointments. And their husbands usually didn't have a clue.

Angela nodded. Her gaze wandered around the room for a few seconds before returning to him.

"I can't help but think, though: What if there is something? And we could have known about it?"

"What are you saying here?" Tony asked, not sure where she was going with this.

"I suppose I would want us to prepare as best we can. I don't want us to be blindsided."

Tony let that sink in. "So, if we found out, you know, that something isn't- that something is wrong," – he forced himself to say it - "you wouldn't consider-"

Angela shook her head almost violently, but what she said next, and how she said it, sounded more ambivalent.

"No, of course not. Unless it's something that's not- and even then, I don't know if I could … I mean, what if- And we have the older children to consider, college, your career, the Agency."

She looked at him with glistening eyes, grasping for words to say the unspeakable.

Tony swallowed around his dry tongue and tried hard not to let his thoughts go too far down that road. They had both read through the list of conditions that the amniocentesis would be testing for. While some seemed manageable, others would have very dire consequences or were even 'incompatible with life'. What a terrible expression.

He reached for her hand and squeezed. "Let's not play 'What if' now, okay?" he said, echoing Angela's Thanksgiving wish for them not to worry about questions they may not even have to face. "The odds are very much in our favor here. And we'll cross that other bridge if we ever get to it."

"Okay." Angela nodded again, visibly relieved.

"And you're right," Tony continued, resolved to be the support that she needed, even if his own feelings on the issue were complicated. Maybe it was his Catholic upbringing. "It's the smart thing to do. I want us to be prepared."

"I'll call Dr. Solomon next week."

"I can come too, right? I'm not letting you go alone."

"Of course. I want you there. And did you see that we can find out the sex if we want?"

Angela smiled and looked at the brochure, as if to point out a silver lining now that the difficult decision had been made.

ooooooooo

One question remained for Tony, and he finally gathered the courage to ask it when they were lying in the dim glow of the light on his nightstand late that Saturday night.

"Hey, Angela?"

"Hm?" she mumbled, nestled sleepily against his bare chest.

"We're still telling the kids about my job, right? And then the rest of the world?"

"Of course."

"I was just thinking. Because of the amni- because of the test."

"I don't think I want to be making pregnancy announcements just yet. But people are going to speculate, anyway, and I want to start telling the truth about us."

"Good, good." Tony pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. "Same here."

With a soft sigh, Angela turned onto her back.

"What do you think she's doing in there while we're out here, making all these decisions?" Tony asked.

There, he had done it again, called the baby a 'she'. He tried not to slip up like this, because they had no way of knowing. But he just couldn't shake the hunch.

"Hmm," Angela made. Her belly rose and fell with each breath she took. "I think she's dreaming."

"Dreaming?"

"Yeah."

"Of what?" Tony asked while his pointer finger drew a slow, straight line down from her belly button.

"Of what it's going to be like once she gets here."

"Well, it's going to be summer," he offered.

"Yeah."

"We're going to be married."

"Mh-hm."

"I think it's going to be great."

"Me too."