cl;

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Claire Lyons.

That girl is me.

–

I look at myself in the mirror one more time. My skirt is pressed, my shirt is straight, my bangs are frizz-free, my shoes are spotless. I nod to myself and go downstairs, where Todd is in his chair and playing with oatmeal, my mother urging him to eat. She looks up when she hears me and smiles.

"Oh, you look beautiful, Claire," she says. I feel relieved at her approval, then she turns back to Todd. "Eat, Todd, Mommy's having guests come over soon."

My mom is an architect, and she likes having clients over to show off the house, which she had designed. It's nice, I suppose. A bit big, and I thought the spiralling grand staircase was a kinda gauzy, but I'm not the professional.

"Hi Todd," I greet, smiling broadly at my little brother. He gives me a lopsided smile, oatmeal dripping out of his mouth. I grab a paper towel and clean it up. "Today's my first day of senior year, Todd. Are you excited?"

Todd nods.

A car honks outside, and I realize Massie is actually early, for once. "Gotta go, Mom," I say, grabbing an apple and running out the front door.

"Be back by three!" She calls. "I have to leave for the office!"

"Yeah, Mom," I mutter, closing the door. A limo is waiting. I sigh inwardly. Of course Massie would go flashy for the first day at school. At least she didn't bring the Lamborghini – then she would've insisted on driving, and I didn't trust Massie behind the wheel. Even when she's sober she's kind of out of control.

The door pops open as I rush down the front steps. Massie's inside of course, with a cigarette dangling elegantly from her index and middle fingers.

"Fucking school," Massie yawns, closing her heavily made-up eyelids. "I am so hungover from Dylan's party yesterday. Did you go?"

I shake my head. "I wasn't invited."

"Neither was Alicia Rivera. She ended up dancing on the table in her underwear." Massie laughs, then puts the cigarette to her lips.

I shrug. "My parents wouldn't have let me gone anyway. I had to babysit Todd."

Massie raises an eyebrow. "Isn't he like, thirteen already?" I stare at her, trying to make her realize what she had just said. She looks down, her hair making a curtain around her face. "Sorry." She looks up again and tucks her hair behind her ear as the limo pulls to a stop. "Let's go to hell, Claire," she says, opening the door and stepping out.

"some say you're a troubled boy

just because you like to destroy

all the things that bring the idiots joy

well what's wrong with a little destruction?"

dh;

"Yes," Kemp says, eyeing a leggy blonde. Then he sees a chubby girl with green streaks in her hair and heavy eyeliner walks by and makes a face. "No." The volleyball coach strides past us, and Kemp grins. "Yes."

I turn the volume up on my iPod, trying to drown him out. "I can't believe I'm being seen with you in public," I tell him, swinging the other earphone around my index finger, feeling bored. I lean back against the huge oak tree in the middle of the courtyard. I can feel the half-dead grass through my jeans. "Not all of us have slept with girls in alphabetical order by first name, I'm sorry to report," Kemp argues. Alicia Rivera walks by, the buttons of her Ralph Lauren polo shirt undone. "Yes. Hell yes."

Alicia apparently hears, because she turns and gives Kemp a sly smile.

"Alphabetical by first and last names," Josh corrects Kemp, squinting into the sun. He takes out a pair of sunglasses and puts them on. I don't get Josh's obsession with sunglasses. I think it's pretty queer. "And I think he's onto the Greek alphabet now." Then again, girls seem to fall for it, and Josh really only cares about girls.

"Not one part of that statement is true," I say. Josh shrugs and looks away, back at the girls walking past.

"Yes," Kemp says to Dylan Marvil, who throws him a disgusted look. Kristen Gregory saunters by, her blonde braid swinging. Kemp considers her for a moment. "No."

"Why not?" Josh asks. "I'd say yes."

"She'd be too high maintenance," Kemp says. "She'd want me to get all this shit for her. She'd ask me if she looks fat. I can't deal with that." He shakes his head to emphasize.

Claire Lyons and Massie Block glide by, arm in arm. "Yes," Josh says. "Very, very yes."

"Which one?" Kemp asks.

"Is it wrong to say both? Maybe at the same time?"

I sigh and put the other earbud into my ear, letting my friends talk about them. It's general knowledge that they were hot, yeah, but basically untouchable. Claire is like walking proof that perfection does exist, with perfect grades and perfect clothes and a perfect family and a perfect record and a perfect life, in general. Massie's the opposite; she smokes in the hallway, comes to school hungover, starts fires (allegedly), steals clothes and test answers. Her mom is some European socialite who's never home and her dad... Well, no one wants to know what her dad does.

They're best friends and they talk to absolutely no one.

"God, even Harrington couldn't get one of them," I hear Josh say wistfully.

I snort and take out my earphones. "I wouldn't say that," I murmur, looking at Massie's retreating figure.

"Do you want to bet money on it?" Josh challenges. Cam suddenly appears, holding a soccer ball in one hand and a cell phone in the other.

"What are we betting money on?" He asks, setting the ball on the ground and sitting next to it, snapping the phone shut.

"Harrington's package," Josh announces.

"Uh," Cam says uncertainly.

Josh studies me. "If you can sleep with Massie before the end of the school year, I'll pay you..." He trails off, thinking. "Two hundred dollars."

"Great," I say. "Now give me two hundred bucks."

Josh stares blankly for a few seconds, then his jaw drops at the same time Kemp and Cam start swearing profusely. "I think I know what you're trying to say but I'm not believing you," Josh babbles, looking like he was about to go into epileptic shock or something.

"Holy fuck. Holy fuck. Holy fuck. Holy fuck," Cam chants under his breath, his eyes wide.

"I think he's bullshitting us," Kemp says. I wait for them to stop, looking for Massie. She's sitting on a bench a few feet away. "Okay. Okay. If you can prove that you slept with Block, I will raise Josh's two hundred to three hundred if you can sleep with Lyons."

I look over towards her. She's getting up and walking towards us. "Hey Massie," I greet when she's about a foot away from the tree.

She doesn't break her stride or even look at me, but she puts her hand up in a sort of half-assed wave and says, "Hey Derrick," her voice tired like it always is.

I look at my friends. Even if I had only said hi, Josh is looking stunned, Cam looks faint, and Kemp still looks skeptical, but he shrugs and says, "Wow. You're so not human."

Josh looks at the retreating figures of the two girls. "So three hundred bucks, Claire Lyons, end of the school year?" He offers.

"I'll put in fifty," Cam volunteers. "What? He might actually be able to do it."

"Whatever," I say, putting my earbuds back in.

"This is going to be interesting," Cam murmurs.

author's note: thank you for the reallyreallyreally amazing reviews for the trailer. was the first chapter okay? please tell me (: lyrics are from and franz ferdinand. can you tell i love franz ferdinand?

finding-forever.: thank you so so much for your review, i really appreciated it. wow, i sound clichéd. okay, but seriously, thanks. um, if i could give you a twix bar, or maybe luke pasqualino, i totally would.

emeraldeyes101: thank you and i just don't like saying thank you over and over again. how about in german? danke. danke schoen.

youkeepmehangingon: um, merci for your review and yes i love claire and derrick. well, i haven't read the books in like two years but i remember liking them. so i figure that's the same thing. whatever. tak! (my friend says that's danish?)