Thanks everyone for your feedback. It has really helped. Again, I dont own these characters. Just writing a drama to get through some insomnia!
Luke and Casey had just polished off their steaks, Luke was just starting to relax again.
"So Case, I wanted to talk to you about the new wing at Memorial. The money from the foundation will be directed at funding a new wing. I will be involved in the design but Bob is still deciding on whether to refurbish Paediatrics or Oncology or set up a Neurology wing. I have been avoiding Bob's calls for a while as I have been distracted and not really focused. What do you think?"
"You have been like this for years Luke. You work hard but its seems part of you is always somewhere else."
"No Case, I meant my ideas about the new wing."
"Oh well, it should really be Neurology shouldn't it? I mean both the Oncology and Paediatric departments were refurbished not too long ago – at least they exist. Neurology patients – like some of our stroke patients just get spread between other wards. Which is not ideal and makes both the facilities and staff training inadequate."
"That sounds feasible. Speaking of strokes, isn't Tom doing well? He is such a strong man. So determined to not let anything beat him."
Just then Katie wandered in and sat with them.
"Hi Katie" they both said.
She didn't reply and just sat there for a minute staring at Luke.
"Katie, what is it? What's wrong? Is it Jacob?" Luke asked.
"Luke, I am so sorry. I wish Chris had told me, or at least spoken to me about this before he and Bob made a decision. I didn't know they were going to ask him to head the department, and now he is also Chief of Staff when Bob retires in a few weeks. And he only rang me himself just now. I have been trying to find you. Why didn't you answer your phone?"
"Katie, Katie, KATIE! Slow down. What is wrong? What are you talking about?" Luke tenderly rubbed her arm. Se felt even worse. He was the most gentle and loving person she knew – he was not going to cope well with this.
"Luke it's Bob and the new wing you are funding – and helping to set up. Bob and Chris have already decided it is to be a Neurology wing."
"That's ok, that's good actually – I think I just decided that myself."
"No Luke, that's not all. Bob has retired and has already found his replacement. No its not Chris before you say anything."
"And…" Luke prodded.
"Well the specialist that will be the director of the Neurology wing will also be Chief of Staff at Memorial."
"They must be extremely qualified and skilled then Katie. What is the problem?"
"Luke, its Reid. Reid is the director of the new Neurology wing and he is also the Chief of Staff. He arrives tomorrow."
Casey and Katie watched as Luke's face blanched, and then went bright red as he seemed to be holding his breath.
"I have to go-"
"Luke wait, stay and-"
"I am sorry guys, I cant, I have to go" they both watched as Luke nearly ran from Yo's.
Luke slammed the door to his apartment and slumped onto the lounge. This cant be happening to me he thought. I can't see him again. I cant. I still think about him every day. Thinking about his beautiful blue eyes, soft lips and his gorgeous red-blond hair.
He replayed their last day together in his head over and over. Reid never gave him the chance to explain, broke his nose and then disappeared. It has been so many years since he saw him. The day they finally said they loved each other. The day Noah also decided he wanted to come out of the closet. Luke let his mind wander.
"Please Luke, can we talk. Walk with me down to the pond."
"Sure, but I cant be out long, I have something I want to do"
"What?" asked Noah "Are you seeing someone?"
Luke's eyes and unconscious smile said it all to Noah.
"Who is he Luke? Do I know him? I thought we had something?"
"What? Noah, you pushed me away, Jesus, you were still hiding your sexuality. You cant have expected me to wait indefinitely"
"I am sorry Luke. I know what I want now."
"And so do I Noah. I don't want you. I want-"
Noah rushed forward "Don't you dare say his name. I know you want me."
Luke simply shrugged at him. "Not anymore Noah. Not like that."
"I know you want this." Noah grabbed Luke's face with his hands and roughly kissed him, forcing his tongue into his mouth. Luke felt nothing kissing him. Not the fire he did whenever Reid just looked at him. He started to shove him away.
He looked up when he heard a gasp behind him. Reid looked devastated. But Luke knew that Reid knew he loved him. Noah kissed him and he didn't respond, he was pushing him away. So he chased after Reid to explain, say something to take that hurt look away from his eyes.
Next thing Luke was laying in the dirt, his head spinning.
He woke in the hospital the next day, sporting a broken nose and a major bruise over his eye. His first thoughts were of Reid. He had to find him, to explain. Make him understand. Then make HIM apologise for over-reacting and bashing his boyfriend.
He left the hospital at a rush. Taking a taxi to Reid's home. He lived with his parents.
"Sorry, Luke is it? Reid isn't here."
"Oh. When will he be home?"
"Uh, he left for Washington this morning."
"WHAT? Why? For how long?"
"Well, for at least 5 years. He is studying medicine at Washington State University."
"But he only got the letter the other week. Term wouldn't be starting for a few months. He is on holiday now." I explained. Panic clear in my voice as the pitch rose inappropriately high.
"Well, it was sudden. He came home last night. Said he was leaving in the morning to find somewhere to live, get to know the town and set up so he can concentrate on getting ready for his future."
"Shit. Reid. What are you doing. Oh, I am sorry."
"He did look very upset last night. I am starting to realize you may be the reason. I just want him to be happy so we let him go."
"Can you tell me where he is staying?"
"Luke. I am sorry I cant. He was very clear when he said no one from Oakdale could know where he is. We don't even have a mobile for him. He said he lost it and will call us tonight when he arrives and then will sort the rest later."
As she spoke I felt the tears spill down my face. I couldn't breathe. This cant be happening. I can't lose him. I cant breathe.
Again, I woke up in hospital.
"Luke, sweetie, you're awake" I opened my eyes to see my mother watching me.
Oh thank god, I thought. I dreamt he left. I reached for my mobile to call Reid and start to sort this mess out. I stopped with my arm mid-air as my mother said "Luke sweetie, why were you around at the Oliver's? When she rang me to say you collapsed and I got the fright of my life. You should not have discharged yourself from hospital. Well you didn't even discharge, you just…..blah blah blah" I zoned out from listening to my mothers drivel.
It wasn't a dream, or a nightmare. This was real. Reid is gone.
I want to die.
Luke woke from his sleep and that awful dream he has had so many times. Threw his keys at the wall "Fuck" and walked to the kitchen to find something he could eat.
This is brilliant. Reid is coming back to Oakdale and I am a mess.
No worse than that. I am a mess, and an idiot because he obviously cares so little about what we had that he is coming home without a problem. I know I sure as hell can't imagine being anywhere near him and actually coping.