Sorry I haven't updated in a while x but I've been really busy!
I went camping last week (which was sooooo uncomfortable! I was squashed next to a pole!)
Also went to Gay Pride today! It was awesome (Ps: I'm not gay, I just went!)
Anyway because I've been a bad author I have put up 2 (yes 2) chapters!
On with the story
*The beginning of the end*
Gossiping and the ride home
After Lily had gotten a grip on herself the four girls headed to the kitchens for Lunch, as Lily didn't want to see Severus in the Great Hall.
The house elves made them each their favourites, lasagne for Willow, chicken for Marlene, curry for Alice and BBQ ribs for Lily. They walked to their Transfiguration exam loudly, someone was always speaking. Lily knew her friends were doing this to keep Lily's mind off of Severus, but she didn't care, it helped. A lot!
They each had to go into Professor McGonagall's room; there she told that pupil what was happening. Professor McGonagall stepped out of her room "Ashford, Henry" she said before turning and going back into her room.
"Urgh, I hate being first" he muttered loudly, following the Professor through the door. Everyone waited for Henry to return, to ask him what had happened. After five minutes, which seemed more like an hour he came out. He was met with "What happened?" "How'd it go?" "Was it easy?"
"Can't say, McGonagall said if I speak to anyone about it before they've done theirs I'll go down one whole grade! And from what I did in there, I can't afford it!" he turned and walked down the hall.
Professor McGonagall opened the door again "Abbot, Lucy" Lucy muttered something, before reluctantly following the Professor.
Lily nervously waited her turn; Sirius had walked out saying "Pip squeak!"
Whereas other's found it hard, "Ah, shit" Jess had said.
Professor McGonagall opened her door, yet again "Evans, Lily" Lily took a deep breath before following McGonagall. "Good luck" Alice called.
Inside the room was a lone desk, on the table was a dove. "I need you to transform this dove into a glass goblet and back. Without speaking. Points will be awarded on how nice the goblet looks" Professor McGonagall said, taking a step backwards.
Lily nodded, she pointed her wand at the dove, shut her eyes and thought of a glass goblet. It was made from crystal and had beautiful golden vines that wrapped round main part of the glass. Scarabyga! Lily thought, she felt a surge of power ripple through her wand, Lily slowly opened her eyes. When she did, instead of seeing a dove she saw a glass goblet in front of her. Unfortunately it had no golden vines but Professor McGonagall didn't know she wanted them on there.
"Yes!" Lily cheered, but then quietened down when she remember where she was.
Professor McGonagall looked a Lily, the sides of her lips twitching "Care to turn it back?"
Lily nodded; her cheeks blushing slightly. Lily thought of the dove every detail she could remember. She cast the spell once again and when she opened her eyes a white dove stood before her.
Lily smiled in triumph; she turned to look at her Professor "You may leave now Miss Evans. But I ask you do not speak of this to any other student till they take their exam. If you do I'll be forced move you down a grade" she smiled as the redhead nodded.
Lily left the room happily; she thought she had done quite well.
"How'd it go?" Alice hissed as she passed her, Lily smiled in response.
Lily headed back to the common room, as all her friends were still waiting for their exam (their names were way after hers) Lily didn't know where to sit.
"Lily, want to sit with us?" Phoebe Collingwood called, Lily smiled at her gratefully. They may have been in the same year, but they weren't close, sure they would talk if they sat next to each other, but they wouldn't go out their way to do so.
Lily realised why she had been called over, Phoebe's best friend Piper was chatting up Sirius. Jess sat there looking relatively bored, not trying to make conversation.
"Lily-bean!" Sirius said as she sat down, much to Piper's annoyance.
"Drop dead, Black!" Lily snarled.
Phoebe laughed nervously, "So…what did you think of the test, Lily?" she asked
"It was alright, I think I did well" Lily answered honestly
"And that's only because Jamesy-boy helped you" Sirius sang
"James, James Potter helped you?" Jess cried
Lily nodded slowly; she was going to kill Black. Jess stood pointing her wand straight at Lily "Why? You're not even nice to him! Why does he constantly go out of his way for you! It's always you, always" she hissed at Lily.
"What's going on here than?" Lily heard Willow ask. Jess' head snapped up, Lily took the opportunity to get out her wand and disarm Jess. Jess flushed a strange pinkish colour, before storming out the room to their dorm. Phoebe smiled apologetically before dragging Piper up the stairs Jess had disappeared up.
Willow sat in the seat Phoebe just left, stretching her feet across Lily's lap.
"Well she's obviously PMSing" said Sirius
Neither girl paid him any attention.
That night Lily was packing her trunk, she was leaving for the summer holidays tomorrow, she wore a comfy red dressing gown, with gold lining. Lily loved it because it was the Gryffindor colours; Marley had got it for her for Christmas that year.
"Lily we're not leaving until tomorrow you could pack then" said Willow flipping through some Quidditch magazine.
"I like to be prepared" Lily answered; Willow knew she wasn't paying attention as she was thinking of Severus again.
"Lily, he's not worth it" Willow said getting up and standing next to Lily.
"I know, it's just, he…he was my best friend for so long and…and I don't know what to do!" Willow wrapped her arms round her friend.
"If he can't see what a great friend you are, he's an idiot!"
"Thanks" Lily said whipping her eyes.
The door opened and Mary stood, breathing heavily "Lily you have to come now! Snape is outside the common room, he wants to talk you. Said he'd sleep there all night!" she cried.
"Oh Merlin!" she moaned to no one in particular "Thanks, Mary" Lily said running down the stairs. No one was speaking in the whole room; they all knew what was happening. Great! Lily thought sarcastically.
"I'll wait here for you" Willow whispered in Lily's ear. Lily nodded and headed through the portrait.
As soon as Severus saw her he began apologising "I'm sorry"
"I'm not interested" Lily replied, crossing her arms
"I'm sorry!" he tried again.
"Save your breath." she paused, staring at him "I only came out her because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here."
"I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just –"
"Slipped out?" there was no pity in Lily's voice, she refused to side with him anymore "It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends – you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?"
He opened his mouth, but closed it again without speaking.
"I can't pretend anymore. You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine" Lily said.
"No – listen, I didn't mean –"
"– to call me Mudblood? But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?"
He struggled on the verge of speech, but with a condescending look she turned and climbed back through the portrait.
When she entered the common room everyone was silent, watching the entrance Lily had just come through. "Are all your lives so boring you have to live of someone else's?" she screamed "You're all sick! Gossiping about stuff that has nothing to do with any of you!"
Lily turned back through the doorway and ran through the castle; she ran and ran and ran till she had no clue where she was anymore. She leaned against a wall; slipping down it she brought her knees under her chin, and hugged herself. The first tear fell, and after the first the others just kept coming and coming.
"Evans, don't cry" Lily looked up to see James sliding into the space beside her.
"What do you want, Potter?" Lily spat.
"Just came to see if you're alright. You seemed really upset" he said, Lily almost believed him, almost.
"Well, you've seen. Now go." she hissed
"I'm not leaving"
Lily's tears had near enough stopped by now, she sighed "How did you even find me?"
"I have my ways" he smiled at her, she didn't smile back.
"Look, I'm probably gunna be out here for a while. I'm not going in there when everyone else is there, so you might as well go"
"Ahhh, that is why I brought this!" he said, standing up he took out a cloak.
"A cloak?" Lily asked confused, he wrapped it round himself. He disappeared all but his head! "You're invisible! So that's how you do all your pranks!" she seemed impressed.
He nodded "So all you have to do is put this on, and when I opened the portrait you sneak in"
"Thank you" Lily smiled before jumping up and wiping her eyes "But this doesn't make everything alright between us"
"Wouldn't have it any other way"
They walked back to the fat lady in silence, once outside Lily covered herself with the cloak, James said the password. They both walked in, although everyone assumed it was just James. Lily ran to her room undetected.
"James! Did you find her?" Alice asked running over to James, he nodded at her "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" she hugged the guy she had known her whole life "Where is she?"
"In your dorm" he answered
"How is that even possible?" she asked suspiciously, James just smiled at her.
Alice stared at him for a few seconds before running up to her dorm. "Lily? Lily, you in here?"
"Over here" Alice heard Lily say, she threw back the curtains round Lily's bed. Alice saw her friend just sitting on her bed, staring at the wall.
Alice sat next to her "Sorry for snapping like that" Lily whispered
"It's fine, I would have done the same" Lily smiled at her "It's okay to cry you know"
"I think I'm all cried out" Lily laughed, not her usual happy, bubbly laugh but a sad laugh.
The summer afternoon sun was blazing down on all the bustling students. Marley grabbed Lily's arm pulling her towards the scarlet steam engine. They jumped onto it and followed Alice and Willow to an empty compartment.
Marley sat down, Lily laid down her head resting on Marley's lap whilst Alice sat upside down and Willow leaned against the seat.
"I'm so happy to be going home!" Marley said "No more exams to worry about, no classes, just fun, fun, fun!"
"I would rather do exams then go home; Petunia just keeps getting worse and worse!" Lily moaned
The other three laughed "I'm sure it'll be okay." Alice reassured her friend
"Thanks, Al, but I doubt it"
There was a knock on the compartment door; Remus was standing on the other side.
"Come in!" Alice sang
He opened the slidey door, and looked straight at Lily. "We've – uh – got Prefect duties, unless –"
Lily jumped up "Sorry – I forgot"
"It's okay"
"See you guys in a bit" Lily called over her shoulder as she left the compartment with Remus, grabbing James' invisibility cloak as she went.
"Can you give this back to Potter, for me?" she asked handing Remus the cloak.
"Ah, yeah, he said he let you borrow this"
"It's pretty cool"
"Yeah, I guess it is. Um – Lily? Are you alright now?"
Lily was sick of people asking her if she was alright and as much as she wanted to snap at him, she couldn't. He seemed genuinely concerned, unlike everyone else who just wanted the gossip.
"I'm –" she wanted to say fine, but for some unknown reason she didn't want to lie to Remus "No, I'm not alright. But it's nothing a big tub of ice-cream won't fix"
"Lily, why don't you just talk to Snape?"
"Because I can't change what happened, anymore than he can. We just…can't go back"
"It's my entire fault" Remus moaned "If I just stopped James and Sirius –"
"Don't!" Lily cut over him "Don't you dare blame yourself; it's not your fault. Or Black's. Or even Potter's. It was a long time coming, it would have happened sooner or later with or without Potter and Black."
"You really love him don't you? Snape I mean."
"He was like a brother to me; I thought – I thought he was different to his friends. I feel like I don't even know him anymore" Remus moved as though he were about to put his arm round her but thought better of it.
"He's not the same person who told me about the magical world, or who I could spend hours talking to, or who I would spend my entire summer holidays with, who I would sneak out after hours just because he was on prefect duty and he was bored, who I would call in the middle of the night coz I couldn't sleep, who would come over for dinner everyday, hell he practically lived at my house, he's not the same guy who helped me sneak out coz I wanted to see some gig, who hugged me when I was crying. And I miss him I miss who he used to be!"
This time Remus did wrap his arm around her. He didn't say anything, he didn't know what to say "You must think I'm a total freak now" she laughed
"No, you must really care about him" Lily nodded "I never knew. Look, I'll take you back to your friends"
"But what about –"
Remus cut her off "I'll do it, its fine" Remus took her back to her cabin, before finishing the round. He headed back to where he had left his friends. Remus chucked James his invisibility cloak.
"How's Evans?" he asked
"I never knew how close she was with Snape." Remus said, more to himself then in answer to James' question.
"What did she say?" he asked leaning forward
"That's not really my place to say, ask her"
"She won't tell me, please Moony!"
"Sorry, Prongs"
"Just answer, does she blame me? For her and Snape?"
"No, she doesn't blame anyone. Said it was a long time coming, that it would have happened sooner or later"
James breathed out a sigh of relief, and Remus had to think that James might care for Lily more than he let on. That she wasn't not just for the chase, that she actually meant something to him. It was more than just dating every girl in their year and above, it was about dating her, Lily Evans.