To Zim'sMostLoyalServant: To be honest, the first story was just a scrapped version of "Possessed". Absolutely no edits were made to it whatsoever. So, in answer to your question, the reason everyone laughed at Dib even though they didn't know it was him is because he looked so stupid that it wouldn't make sense not to laugh. About your request, you did mean what I think you mean. Right?

Anyway, on with the story. It's a lemon. The first lemon I've ever done (so far...on this site...that you know of). And it's *looks at index card and squints really hard* GATR. I've never done GATR before, but I'll give it my best shot. Also, it sounds like "Aligator". Ah-hem, here's an AliGATR by Exogorth. Heh. So, here goes nothing. P.S. Forgive me for this, as I regret nothing! P.S.S. New separating lines *giggles (rather unconvincingly) like a school girl*. P.S.S.S. There's a "Drawn Together" reference hidden somewheres in here, a cyber-cookie to anyone who can find it!

XxxxxxX

Story 2: (She's a) Teenage Heart-throb.
Painstakingly drawn before a live audience by Exogorth.

XxxxxxX

The last bell of the day rang and all the students were dismissed.

Dib and his sister Gaz walked home.

As soon as they walked through the door they were greeted by their father, Professor Membrane.

"Hello, children. How was your first day of Hi Skool?"

"Horrible. I got my ass kicked repeatedly." Dib replied. He had a black eye and numerous visible bruises, along with scratch marks.

"I'm going up to my room. No disturbances. Believe me, you'll live longer." Gaz replied darkly and stormed up to her room.

"What was her problem?" Dib asked.

"Ah, you know hormones." replied the Professor. "Listen, I have to go out for a while. Big science meeting, you know."

"How long will you been gone?"

"I'll be back sometime later tonight. Should be no later than midnight."

"Midnight? Will I even survive until then?"

"Of course you will." 'My poor, insane son.' Membrane thought to himself. "Well, um, I better be going. Bye now. And behave yourself."

"Yes, dad." Dib groaned. Then the Professor locked and closed the door. Now Dib was all alone...with his sister. 'I'd better not piss her off, or else...' Dib shuddered at the thought. Then rushed up into his room to do his homework.

XxxxxX

Gaz sat in her room, angry at the fact that she had homework right now. As if she'd do it, but still.

"That Mrs. Eudolph is such a bitch, I mean homework on the first day. What the fuck is wrong with her?"

XxxxxX

"There!" Dib said. "All done...Now what?"

Then there was a huge crash outside.

BOOM!

"What the hell was that?"

XxxxxX

Dib quickly rushed outside to find a smoldering scrap heap of a ship in the back yard.

"Another spaceship? The grass hasn't even fully grown back from when Tak's ship crashed all those years ago!"

"Ow! Irk damn it!" a familiar voice yelled from the ship.

"Tak?" Dib called, afraid someone would recognize him (even if it was Tak).

"Dib?" the voice called back.

Tak climbed out of the wreckage. She didn't look too different. In fact the only real difference in her appearance was the fact that she was taller. Around 5' 4'', the same height as Gaz.

"Tak! What are you doing back on Earth?"

"What do mean, stupid human?"

"We all thought you were dead."

"Pfft. Me, the almighty Tak? Dead?" she laughed rudely. "Oh, that's a good one."

Dib gave her an angry stare.

"Oh, you were serious."

"Yes. Now allow me to ask again, what are you doing here?"

"Silly little monkey-boy, I've come to destroy all human-kind."

"HEY!" Gaz's voice screamed from the back door. "I said no disturbances and-Wait, what is she doing here?"

"I'm here to destroy all humans, purple demon human." Tak replied.

"Well, finally."

"Wait, you don't have a problem with this?"

"No. Why would I?"

"Well, I would just assume that no one would actually want me to."

"Well, you were wrong."

"Oh, then my plan is ruined. I give up."

"Yay!" Dib cried with joy. "The Earth is saved!"

"Shut up!" the two females shouted in unison.

"Fine. If anyone needs me, I'll be in my room." Dib said sadly.

"Doing what?" Tak asked him, not really wanting to know (but she felt she had to anyway).

"What do you think?"

The door slammed and Dib went up to his room, locked the door and drew the blinds.

"Eww..." Tak muttered to herself. "Anyway, my ship is totaled. I require I a place to stay! Can I crash here?"

"Yeah sure, whatever."

"Okay then. Quickly, purple-haired girl, lead me inside!"

"Alright, alright. Keep your fucking clothes on!"

She opened the door and led Tak inside.

"Ooh, nice place." Tak said, observing the house.

"I guess you can sleep on the couch or something. Oh, and don't touch my sodas. Word to the wise."

Tak gave a single nod showing she understood. "That's okay, I do not require sustenance. Or sleep."

"That's good. Still, keeps your filthy mitts off my sodas."

"Okay, yeesh!"

"Hey, don't get smart with me."

Tak gave Gaz a shove, making her stumble backwards and fall (aww shit).

"Ow, damn it!"

"Weakling!"

"Oh, that's it. You're dead, bitch!"

Gaz got back up and walked straight towards Tak. They were inches away from each other, each giving the other a harsh stare. Then the cold looks on their faces grew warm and they stared longingly into each others eyes.

Uh oh, I know where this is going. If this isn't for you, please turn back now. I won't be offended.

Then they both did something neither of them expected of themselves, they kissed. And they liked it (I am so twisted). They stopped for a split second, Tak giving Gaz a look as if saying "Is it okay?"

"It's okay, my dad's not home." Gaz whispered to her.

Tak nodded and smiled and they resumed their kiss.

They fell onto couch, still making out. Moaning into each other's mouths, they grew more and more aroused with each passing second.

Gaz shuddered in delight when she felt their tongues touch. She had always wondered what an Irken's tongue felt like. And now she knew. It was rough, yet still smooth and delicate. But no matter how it felt, it was still a great feeling whenever their tongues touched.

They stopped only to catch their breath, but they both looked to the stairs and saw Dib.

He was just standing there, mouth agape (and an erection, too). His eyes showed a mixed expression of shock, fear, concern and arousal. He had heard the loud thud from Tak pushing Gaz and came down to see what all the commotion was.

They all said nothing for a few seconds and then Gaz finally broke the silence. "Get lost, Dib! This is none of your business!"

He couldn't think of anything to say.

"Now, Dib!"

"..."

"LEAVE!"

He ran upstairs into his room and locked the door behind in case Gaz had given chase, but she didn't. She continued her passionate make out session with Tak.

They continued for a few more seconds before Tak finally broke away.

She looked like she was about to say something, but couldn't get any words out. Instead, she silently worked on removing her own clothing.

Gaz simply watched, curious to see what a naked Irken looked like.

She watched with much anticipation as Tak removed her gloves and shirt. But she had to let Tak get up so that she could fully undress. And she did.

Tak could get up now. So she got up and started to remove more clothing. Slowly. Piece by piece.

Gaz couldn't take it, however, being brash and impatient. She got a little on edge. "Hurry up." she commanded.

Tak gave a nod and quickly undressed completely.

Gaz got very excited upon seeing the naked female Irken.

Tak was indeed a true female. Her breasts were small, but Gaz didn't care. She like, no loved, Tak the way she was already.

Then she spoke for the first time since right before they shared their first kiss together. "Your turn."

Gaz grew nervous, but Tak came over and gave her a comforting hug. "It's okay." she said softly and she kissed her on the cheek.

Gaz gave her a nod and stood up. Tak sat on the couch and watched while Gaz undressed.

Tak, in turn, was excited and curious. Gaz's body wasn't very different from her own. Just the fact that her body was curvier.

And when she was finished, she got on the couch and laid back as Tak got closer and closer until she was on top of the purple-haired girl.

And then Tak began to rub her lower body up against Gaz's. Slowly at first. Then gradually building speed, much to the pleasure of the both of them.

Tak kissed her lover and moved down, gently nipping and sucking on her neck. Giving her a love-bite.

Tak then pulled her head back, leaving a line of saliva. Then she ran her long tongue across her zipper-like teeth and then across her "lips".

They continued scissoring at an even faster pace now, picking up more and more speed with every few seconds. It was pushing them to their limits and bringing them oh so very close.

Until, once again, Dib interupted. "Jesus Christ!"

They both stopped suddenly.

"Not again with this, Dib." Gaz, in her normal angry tone.

"Leave, Dib-human. Now." Tak backed her up.

"Don't make me get up." Gaz cracked her knuckles, ready to deliver punishment at any moment.

"Yes, PLEASE don't make her get up." Tak added.

"You're both crazy! I'm getting out of here!" Dib said and he ran upstairs, screaming like a maniac. A few seconds later, the sound of glass breaking could be heard. Dib had jumped out of the window in his room and ran off. To where he had no idea, but he didn't care. He just ran (so far away).

"My brother, the drama queen." Gaz said, shaking her head.

"Yeah. Now, where were we?" Tak asked and they continued their sexual act.

The speed increased more and more, to the point where neither of them could stand it anymore and they both released.

Tak laid her head down, comforted by the soft flesh of Gaz. "That...was great." she said in between pants.

"Yeah...I've never had...sex with...an alien...before." she replied.

"Me...neither."

XxxxxxX

Eh, I tried. And also, I have no regrets (as of now). Eh...that was...okay, I guess. If you didn't like it, oh well. I guess you can all review now. No flames! Or death threats (I get plenty of those already...I'm not a stalker). And, I swear to God, this was not my idea (as far as I know). Wait, it was. Eh, you better check your data again. 'Cause I sure as hell don't remember coming up with this piece of crap. Well, I better sign off. And quickly, too. I'd hate to turn around and find my mother peering over my shoulder *slowly and carefully turns around* Mom? Just kidding. Seriously though, that'd suck. And also, to everyone, forgive if this lemon sucked. I mean, this is my lemon. Not to mention the fact that I'm fourteen, but that's no excuse (or is it?). And, yeah, the ending was terrible. Forgive me for that one, too. I've been writing this one all fucking day. And it's hard to come up with a good ending when you're tired...and suffering from Writer's Block (I get that CONSTANTLY, no idea why). And I also just noticed that both Zim and Gir weren't in this (they weren't even mentioned), it's the first (and so far the only) thing I've written where's that's happened.

By the way, here's a list of pop culture references (all but the Drawn Together one are included, no one's found that one as of yet): The whole "I'll be in my room." "Doing what?" "Whadda you think?" was taken directly from the Family Guy episode "Perfect Castaway", which was, in turn, a parody of both "Perfect Storm" and "Castaway". I know Tom Hanks was in Castaway,(Wilson! Wilson!) but was he in Perfect Storm, too? I forget. All I know is that at one point in Perfect Storm they have a radio that plays "Man in the Box" by Alice in Chains(damn, that's a good song). The fact that Tak said "Irk damn it" is a reference to the fact that Irkens commonly replace the words "God" and "Lord" with "Irk" (in most things I've read they do). Dib jumping out of the window is a Simpsons reference, characters are ALWAYS jumping out of windows on that show. Example, Dr. Nick: "Ah, such a nice day. I think I'll go out the window. (jumps out of the window)." The various nicknames from Tak is just a reference to the habit Irkens have for coming up with funny synonyms for humans. Gaz not wanting anyone to touch her sodas, well that one's obvious. Membrane's thoughts on his son are also obvious. The grass not growing back is a reference to the fact that Tak usually crashes her ships in Dib's back yard. And Tak being a true woman...a reference to me. Because I'm sick of people always making Irkens hermaphrodites. I mean, I understand the whole incubation chamber and no breeding for military purposes and all, but it's still gross. Know why? Because it reminds me of Hutts, that's why. Hutts are disgusting, slug-like, grotesque, ugly, bad-smelling (you get the deal) hermaphroditic sentient beings of life that exist in the Star Wars universe (mostly as gangsters and crime lords). Notable Hutts include Jabba Desilijic Tiure, Ziro Desilijic Tiure and Gardulla Besadii the Elder. Hutts aren't something to like...they're disgusting. So don't expect any hermaphroditic Irkens in my stories, just a heads up.