"In the meadow of sinful thoughts,
Every flower's a perfect one

Desire within, desire within,
Fall in love with your deep dark sin

I am the Fallen
You are what my sins enclose
Lust is not as creative
As its discovery

God I must confess
I do envy the sinners."

- "She Is My Sin" Nightwish

"Good job, she looks perfect."

Jen resisted the urge to shiver at the husky purr in her ear. She bit her lip, feeling her desire for the woman grow and storm through her veins. She took a deep breath before turning, finding a pair of amused lavender eyes focused on her.

"Thanks," the stylist replied, trying to act nonchalant as usual. She knew she was failing miserably.

Rei leaned against the table, placing a hand on her hip. She could feel the other woman's eyes on her, raking over her body… taking in every curve and every inch of skin… imagining what it would be like to have her…

The publicist smirked, trailing a hand down her side slowly. She watched as Jen swallowed, her green eyes dark with lust.

"Well, I can't keep you on as her permanent stylist, I'm afraid."

"Pity," Jen said distractedly.

Rei forced herself to frown when she realized where the stylist's eyes were, trying to hide her amusement. She cleared her throat. "I take it you like my breasts since you're staring."

The stylist coughed, looking up quickly at the woman's face. She tried to come up with an excuse as to why she was intently staring at the publicist's bosom. But screw it, it was time to stop dancing around the subject and just get to it.

"They are very nice."

Rei felt a smirk stretch her lips. That's it, time for the game to really start.

"You think so?

"I'd be a fool not to."

"Why don't you take me to dinner then?"

Jen stared at the woman before smiling smugly.

"That, Miss Hino, I can do."

Jen felt nervous. It was strange feeling this way before a date. She hadn't felt nervous since… since… well, since Minako.

But Hino Rei wasn't Minako. Well, she kind of was…

Okay, okay, she was losing it. Hino was just another woman, right? Like the ones she's dated before and taken to bed. She wasn't anyone special.

Jen sighed. She must be out of her mind to even think that. Hino was… was…

She was something else, was the only thing she could think of to say. She was a lot like Minako – they both defied definition. There was something about the both of them that made her heart race, made her feel like… like she was in the presence of greatness.

It was stupid, and she knew it. They were both normal women, charismatic and extremely beautiful, yes, but simple humans. It wasn't like they were goddesses or anything, though they looked the part. If anything, she's dated Minako Aino for crying out loud. Hino shouldn't make her anxious like this!

With a renewed sense of purpose and confidence, Jen walked out of her hotel room.

Utena sighed as she sipped her wine, waiting, ah… "patiently" for her companion to arrive. She idly allowed her mind to wander, as Rei wouldn't be there for another ten minutes at least.

This new development between her favorite and the stylist was… troubling. Rei was digging herself a nice little grave and Jen was burying her, though neither of them knew it. Once Minako got wind of the whole affair, as surely she will, all Hell was going to break loose.

She vaguely wondered if that's what the miko wanted. Probably not – well, consciously at least. But behind those beautiful lavender eyes… who the hell knew what she was planning?

"Damnit, can't anything be easy?"

"Of course not."

Utena looked up to see Rei ease herself into the seat across from her. A waiter took her coat then handed her a menu.

"Sorry I'm late."

"I'm used to it."

The miko smiled sheepishly as she browsed the menu. "I talked to O'Reilly today."

"Oh?"

Utena placed her order then looked at the younger woman, watching her as she ordered. When the waiter left, the miko turned to her superior and friend with an unreadable look.

"She says everything's going smoothly. They're scheduled to head back the day after tomorrow."

"Have the arrangements been made?"

"Everything's ready."

"Good, I don't think I have to tell you how important this is?"

Utena watched as the light from the candles softened Rei's features but cast her stormy eyes in shadow. It was in that moment that the woman knew what desperation and pain looked like. The miko's voice held none of her usual confidence, just a hint of bitterness.

"You have no idea…"

Minako ignored the flashes and the microphones being shoved in her face from all directions. Her sunglasses shielded the world from her smoldering blue gaze as she walked into her hotel. The staff rushed out to help with crowd control as she felt her own staff flank her. But even if they didn't, what did she have to fear?

She was immortal, or something close to it. Years will pass and those around her right now, from the vibrant Mei to the charming Patrick, will grow old and die. But not her, she will remain young and beautiful until the day Fate decides that she has paid her dues. Only then can she be relieved of her duty.

Sometimes she wondered why she bothers. All this fame, money and power – what good will it do her in the long run? She'll still have to watch the power drain from Babs' eyes and youth leave Jen. And she'll be alone…

No, not alone. The others will be there… the ones she had abandoned. Did she even have a place with them anymore? Other than the destiny they shared? The destiny she so desperately tried to escape?

Humans are so… how could she even attempt to put human nature in words? It was a powerful force: flawed, unpredictable and surprisingly resilient. We've evolved past the point of being mere animal, so they say, but we are but a more "civilized" shadow of our ancestors and all their "primal" instincts. They left us with the best inheritance of all… the will to survive.

But to survive for what? Everyone had these grandiose ideas of what they live for: family, friends… love. But that's all bullshit. We survive for the sake of survival alone. That primal desire to crawl to the top, and destroy anything and anyone that got in the way. But once you're up there… what's left? You've abandoned everything and everyone… now it's just you… at the top of this mighty mountain with others constantly trying to dethrone you. But you still fight, still desire to preserve what you've earned.

Well, congratulations, Minako, you've made it.

It's fucking lonely at the top, isn't it?

"Well, I think that went well."

The blonde turned to Babs, shedding her coat and tossing it onto the couch. She took the glass Patrick offered her and walked over to the windows.

"By tomorrow it'll be all over the papers you know, that we broke with Siren. Hell, it'll probably be in the news tonight. I'm not expecting much backlash… it's just business after all."

Minako gave a distracted hum for an answer. Babs frowned, but pressed on.

"Our lawyers are meeting with Siren's as we speak to make sure they don't take any legal action, since we didn't break the contract. What we're doing is perfectly within the stipulations-"

"Barbara, I'm on your side remember? I already know all this," Minako said simply.

"All right, Minako, what's got you so…"

"Gloomy and yucky," Mei supplied.

"… gloomy and- Mei!"

The hairstylist giggled when Babs glared at her indignantly. The humor seemed lost on the star, who continued her inspection of the city.

"I'm fine," was the response.

"Bull monkey," Mei protested. "You've been off since we got back here. Do you want to leave again?"

"No," Minako said quickly. She downed her drink, turning and plastering on a smile, one she knew fooled no one. But she had to try.

"I'm fine. Just some… well, it's just stress."

"We should go out, relax, ya know?"

Babs rolled her eyes, giving Mei a look. "That's what we've been doing for the past two weeks."

"Not all of us," Pat mumbled, staring at Minako in concern.

"No, I just need some time to think… to write, really."

"All right… call us if you need anything…" Babs reminded.

"Well, except Jen."

Minako turned back to the window quickly to hide her white knuckles and her clenched jaw. Not trusting herself to speak, she simply nodded.

Barbara sighed softly as she motioned for Patrick and Mei to follow her out. She took one last look at her client before closing the door.

But the star didn't notice their departure. She was trying to calm her hammering heart. The blood rushing to her ears was deafening and all she could hear was the roar… from where though? Her heart? Her head? She felt her emotions rise, bubbling in a foaming mess. She couldn't identify them anymore, just feel them as they threatened to overpower and drown her.

The thought of Jen's hands on her, her lips on hers, her eyes watching her, her thoughts filled with her… it made her sick to her stomach. Anger stormed to the surface, suppressing everything else she felt. It consumed her, causing each cell to scream.

How dare she? How dare that little wench touch the angel?

Minako took a deep breath to calm herself, to push the raging demon back in its cage. It was all about control, all about being in control. Of everything – her feelings and her life. But she had no control over this. She, Aino Minako, had to watch her former lovers shared a kiss… her Rei… share a kiss…

But she had no right to say anything, not a single fucking right. Rei was going out with Jen – fucking her and god only knew what else. And she could only sit by and listen as her stylist talked on and on about how wonderful the dates were. How good her woman was in bed. When they'd both stumble through the door. The way Rei's hair would be a mess since they came this close to just screwing in the taxi.

They'd rip each other's clothes off the second the elevator doors closed. Rei would never appear improper in front of the hotel staff, of course. After all, she was Hino Rei, daughter of Senator Hino. She was the modern day aristocrat, beautiful, polite and well-bred. So to be anything less than… perfect… in public, even if it was one stinking bellboy, was out of the question.

So, she'd wait. Because that's Hino Rei for you. She'd wait until no one was looking before she'd push Jen against the wall. She was strong, so much stronger than people expect by the look of her slender frame. All those curves and that softness hid the strength, the rage, the passion. A fire, that's what she was, burning like a tower inferno, consuming everything and leaving behind absolute destruction as she passed through you.

You can never forget those lips on you. On your skin. Caressing. Bruising. Your body was her temple, her sacred shrine. The way her eyes raked over you made you feel like a fucking goddess, like you were the only one she wanted. You were her world and her center, her grace and her damnation. You were her everything for those precious moments when she'd stop the kisses. Her hands would still. And she would look at you. Just… look at you.

It was like she could see the very core of your existence. Through the damn masks and the act, and actually see you. Whatever you thought you hid so well. Whoever you thought you hid so well. Damnit, she saw things you didn't even know existed. She created a new essence inside of you that filled you completely. It invaded every cell and every thought.

She remade you however she damn well pleased, and you fucking love it. It was exciting and down right terrifying. But it was okay. Because she was kissing you again, ripping your clothes off to get closer to you, to get inside of you and under your skin. She ripped every single thought and everything rational and logical from your mind until all that was left were your body and your senses. Your heightened senses that took in her smell, your own smell and the smell of the freshly washed sheets you'd changed just for that night.

You were her world and damnit, you both knew she was yours. She was the only thing on your mind, the mind that normally screamed for peace begging you to give into this woman that treated your body like her temple. Yet she ravaged it like an animal, destroying everything you thought holy and modeling you into what she craved. You became her puppet – she made you sing and scream and cry. She made you happy and needy and angry. She made you into everything you hated – everything you swore you'd never be.

The worst part? The fucking woman had the audacity to make you love it. She made you love yourself: your disgusting, pitiful, flawed and fucked up self. She made you her goddess, the center of her passion and her anger and her uncontrolled power.

Then, after you've surrendered your entire being, she offered herself to you. She offered you the power to do with her as you pleased, like she had just done with you. All of suddenly, everything shifted. Because for split second, you actually feel like you have control over her.

But you're sadly mistaken. Because to have power over that raging beast of a woman was not necessarily to control her. In fact, the very thought was preposterous. Control that primal, raw force that just ravished your body, bruised your skin and ripped out your soul before putting it back in, better than before?

But it was possible. For you see, just as Rei knew Minako better than Minako knew herself, Minako knew Rei better than Rei knew herself. To control the miko was to get her to that point – s across that ridiculous line she promised never to cross. You became that line. You made her cross it and become you. Become just as flawed as you. Become that raw power that pinned you against the wall and ripped savagely into your skin with her teeth.

You always wore the resulting marks with pride. They marked you as hers and, most wonderous of all, they marked her as yours because you made her lose control.

That's right, you made that proper, well-raised daddy's girl lose it. Lose herself and her fucking mind with the feel of your skin and the way your eyes drank in her form. You made her want you by making your want palpable. It was in the way you touched her – like you wanted nothing more than to rip off the damn blouse that kept getting in the way as you all but shoved her in the direction of your bedroom.

You know what? Fuck the bedroom – any flat surface will do. You made her need. Because need was the only thing that could release the beast lurking beneath the civility and class.

And then you had her.

You had the fire and the rage. She burned through you like you were nothing more than food for that unbridled flame, and you liked it. That's right, you liked how she made you feel like nothing at all but her whole fucking world at the same time. Because she wanted – needed – you enough to give in. And the more you fed her, the more she tore through you. The more savage she became, the more you needed her and the better you felt. Each time the flame grew, you possess another piece of her. This beautiful woman. This beautiful animal. This primal force that you've feared all your life.

You understand, finally, what it means to love fire. The thrill pyromaniacs feel when they see that first, insignificant spark that transforms into a living, breathing element of utter destruction. The anticipation for the fire to grow, knowing the entire time that you were flirting with danger. Fire destroys all in its wake; but from that destruction comes rebirth. So you sacrifice yourself for the chance to become something beautiful – your body, mind, heart, and soul.

She was your guilty pleasure – your sin. She made you feel something you'd never really felt until then: alive.

Now, Jen had that. She held that beautiful sin in her hands. That sin was burning through her body, night after night.

And Minako had no right to fucking say anything. No right to fucking sin anymore, because she had purified herself of that. Of that… "disgusting" primal power.

Yet the only thing she wanted now was to sin again. Her soul depended on it.

Rei slipped out of the arms that held her, sliding from beneath the silk sheets that caressed her hot skin. She pulled on the robe on the nightstand. How'd it get there? It was there, that's all that mattered anyway.

She stood, wrapping her arms around herself as she walked onto the balcony. Her lungs welcomed the crisp night air, as did her mind. Liquor's hold over her was starting to fade, forcing her to grapple with reality.

She slept with her ex's employee and friend. Did it matter? Maybe it did, maybe it didn't. They were together once, but not anymore. It was just a friend of hers, an employee really. It didn't break any of the "sacred laws of dating" that's been drilled into her by… by Usagi and her ex actually.

'Looks like something they told me is finally coming in handy.'

She was probably wrong. It probably did break some spoken or unspoken rule or something like that. But she couldn't bring herself to care.

The sex was fine. It wasn't the best she's ever had, but it wasn't the worse. The thrill? Well, there was one, she just didn't know where it was coming from. Why it was there at all. Perhaps she was mistaken once again and there was no thrill, just the warmth and musk of another human in bed with her, fucking her.

That's all it was, sex. Not love, not making love. She didn't believe in that anymore. A connection of souls, a progression to the next level of love? No, those fantasies and dreams were for the young, for the innocent. She was neither now, though her physical envelope was merely twenty something. She'd long ago stopped counting her years. She's lived far more years than that, both in the sense of her past life and in this one alone.

She's seen too much to remain in the realm of the gleeful joy and exuberance of youth. It was tiring, to be innocent for so long. The sooner a child opened his or her eyes, to use the old cliché, the better. No more dreams, just a bitter yet needed disillusionment.

"Getting philosophical already, Hino?" she chided herself with a chuckle, leaning against the railing. "It's a little too early for that, even for the likes of you."

She sighed, wondering once again what she was doing with the woman inside. She was attracted to her, yes, but to be honest, she was more attracted to the idea that it might piss off Minako.

"Well now you're just perpetuating that damn cycle you hate so much," she said, chuckling as she shook her head.

The second Minako shows up, everything she's learned, everything she's sworn to do flies out the window. Perhaps that's what it means to be under someone's spell. What it means to love someone. To be reduced to an idiot. No, even worse, an innocent child.

It wasn't that being a child is bad, no, not at all. But to allow yourself to hope, to dream… to dare to wish… ahh, it should be a sin. Humanity's strength… right. More like humanity's curse. It would be so much simpler to just have the will to survive. But the desire to be happy, a drive that bordered on insanity and obsession? Just gets you in trouble every time.

Whatever she was doing with Jen, she was with her now. At least, in the most basic sense. Neither woman wanted this to go any deeper. It's just an attraction, someone to scratch that itch, so to speak. It just so happens that it's with a person close to Minako.

Or perhaps it just so happens that a person close to Minako can scratch that itch, but she was far too tired to think about that now. No, this nice little explanation she's set up for herself worked nicely. Ah, self-delusion, it's very handy, and we're all masters of it. Not healthy, of course, and Rei knew that, even in her current state. But it soothed her nerves and calmed her mind. She told herself she'd think about it tomorrow, when the bed wasn't beckoning her. Just a little more hiding, what can it hurt?