A/n: I was VERY pleased by the amount of feedback I received from the first chapter so I typed this one up to get out to you as soon as possible! Hope you enjoy!
Emma was livid as she pulled into the driveway of her condo. She had just about cried out all the tears in her body so the only thing left to dwell on as she rode back from the hospital was Carl.
Carl and how he lied to her.
She gripped the steering wheel so tightly at times her knuckles turned white and her tires screeched in protest as she'd slam her foot down on the gas to get home.
Part of her didn't want to get home. She didn't want to see Carl's face at the moment, she didn't want to see anybody's face, she just wanted to be alone.
But she had a husband now and one who would be wondering why she was late. At first she dreaded telling him but then her anger over powered any fear and though confrontations usually scared her, she felt the same adrenaline pulsing through her veins that she did that day she told off Will in the teacher's lounge. She was angry, she was hurt and she was going to let him know it.
She slammed the car door shut making sure Carl knew she was home and she stormed up to the front door, jiggling her keys into the door and letting it slam open with a loud bang.
She blew out a puff of hair as she stepped into the front hallway waiting for Carl to appear before her. She clenched her jaw tightly at his approaching footsteps and her seething anger only grew as his innocent face appeared around the corner.
She could tell he was about to question her lateness but was distracted by her appearance. She hadn't look in the mirror since she left the bathroom at school but she knew she looked worse than before.
"Ems," His sweet, caring voice was almost sickening and her eyes narrowed into a slight glare, "What happened to you?" A darkness washed over his eyes as he approached her in two long steps, reaching out his arms for her. "It was him again wasn't it? What did he do this time?"
Emma's eyes flashed angrily and she took a step back from Carl. "You know damn well that Will couldn't have done anything." She hissed coldly and Carl's eyes widened in surprise and if she wasn't so angry she would have been too. She hardly ever cursed in fact she was sure Carl had never heard her utter a single curse in the seven months they had been together.
"Is there a call you forgot to tell me about?" She asked calmly. "A call that came early this morning from a certain hospital but you told me it was a wrong number?"
Carl's face had gone stony as he stared at her quietly for a few very long unending seconds. He finally opened his mouth to speak but Emma cut him off roughly.
"He's my best friend Carl, how could you do that?" She cried, feeling the tears that she thought had dried out for that day coming back.
Carl sighed heavily, rubbing the back of his neck. "Don't you think its just a little inappropriate that he has you as his emergency contact?"
Emma's jaw dropped at his slight change in subject but she would not let him get away that easy. "Don't you think I would have been interested to know that my friend is in the hospital? You had no right to keep that information from me!"
"I didn't want you to worry, Ems." Carl answered softly. In the past Emma would have fallen instantly at his sweet charm and his warm, heart felt smile but today she finally saw through it.
"That's not true!" She exclaimed angrily and Carl even shrunk back at her harsh, screechy tone. "You know that's not true! You kept it from me because you didn't want me anywhere near Will! I'm sorry Carl but you're my husband NOT my father. Stop treating me like I'm your fifteen year old daughter!"
"Emma, I just want to protect you -"
"Protect me from what?" She cried, throwing her hands in the air. "Will? You want to protect me from Will? He's not a threat Carl!"
"Like hell he's not!" Carl finally snapped back and Emma faltered for a second but still held her ground. "He's sneaky Emma, he's just waiting for the right time to snatch you up and away from me."
"How dare you?" She hissed coldly. "I know he's done some pretty stupid things in the past but he's my friend first and foremost he would never try to break up our marriage. He respects me too much for that and furthermore he's sweet and sensitive and caring..."
Carl rolled his eyes, interrupting her and she gaped at him, placing her hands on her hips.
"What?" She snapped.
"He's playing you Emma, can't you see that?"
"No Carl, I don't see that because I know Will. He's a man of honor and dignity and he's very trustworthy. I'm sorry that you can't get past your petty jealousy to see that!"
Carl scoffed loudly. "Petty jealousy? You think I'm jealous...of him?"
"Yes." Emma answered surely. "Yes Carl I do, you have no other reason to keep the fact that he was in the hospital from me."
Carl stuttered for a few seconds, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "I-I-I have plenty of reasons."
Emma cocked an eyebrow sharply, waiting for him to explain himself but he only continued to stutter.
She sighed in frustration banging her fists lightly against her thighs. "He could have died Carl. He could have been dead." Her voice cracked on the last word as her tears finally surfaced and rolled down her cheek silently. "And I never would have gotten to say goodbye or..." She paused, her eyes widened for a split second and then she let out another sob as she collapsed to the floor burying her face in her hands.
"Oh Ems..." Carl's voice was soft and caring again and she could hear him approaching. He knelt down beside her and slung his arm around her shoulders, guiding her against his chest.
She grabbed lightly onto his shirt, whimpering quietly as he rubbed her back soothingly. "I'm sorry Emma." He whispered, dropping a kiss to her head.
Then she froze. Her tears stopped, her heart skipped a beat and she even held her breath. She roughly pulled away from him and glared at him darkly from her place now across the room. Carl rose to his feet slowly, the shock evident on his face.
"Don't touch me, Carl." She warned darkly also slowly rising to her feet. "In fact I'd like you to leave."
"Excuse me?"
"I know you still have your old apartment uptown so please leave." She repeated slowly.
"Emma..." Carl approached her slowly, holding out his arms as if he were approaching a wild animal. "Sweetheart lets talk about this."
"There's nothing to talk about Carl, I want to be alone." Emma stressed, keeping her voice and facial expression even.
An awkward tension arose around them as they stared at each other for a long while, Emma's face in an icy stare and Carl's in pondering thought. Then Carl sighed in defeat as his shoulders dropped, "Fine."
Emma continued to keep her icy stare on him as he grabbed his coat and his keys and walked past Emma, walking out the front door and slamming the door behind him. She waited until she heard the familiar sound of his engine coming to life and the screech of his tires as he pulled out of the driveway before she collapsed to the ground again in heaping mess of tears and sobs.
She laid there for hours, even long after her tears had stopped falling. She wanted to move, she wanted to take a shower and get clean. The only problem was the mess she needed to clean was not something that could be scrubbed away with all the soap in the world.
Carl was angry with her, she was angry with Carl, her best friend was in the hospital because she was too busy running from her own feelings to even consider his and continued to endlessly break his heart until he reached a breaking point.
If you had told Emma at the start of the last year that Will Schuester would end up in the hospital because of her she would have been horrified and cried for days at even the thought of hurting Will that badly.
If you had told Emma at the start of last year that she had married her dentist in vegas after only five and half months of dating she would have gone into shock.
If you had told Emma that she would make such a mess of her life that even she could do nothing to clean up she would have denied it profusely and brought out her sanitizing wipes as comfort.
If you had showed Emma the person she had become she would be ashamed.
So Emma curled miserably into her carpeting, waiting, wishing, hoping that world would just go away.
Emma found herself walking into the hospital entrance the next morning, a bit more calmly than the last time.
After a long and seemingly endless self hate party, Emma finally realized that she couldn't just sit back and hide from the world and more importantly she decided that she could not desert Will, not again.
She took a very long shower, tossed and turned all night but awoke with a determined air about her.
She was going to make things right.
She had to.
The nurse behind the desk recognized her from the day before and waved her on. Emma smiled politely in response and boarded the elevator, only hesitating slightly to press the germy button to the third floor.
Emma wasn't sure how she remembered how to get to Will's room but before she knew it she was standing in front of the closed door. Her breath hitched in her chest just at the thought of what lay on the other side. She could barely handle seeing him that way knowing she was the one to blame but she pushed that thought away and slowly entered the room.
She paused only a couple steps into the room when she saw a doctor leaning over Will's machines. The middle aged blonde haired man turned to her at the sound of her heels clicking against the tile and he smiled warmly.
"Hello." He greeted kindly.
Emma's cheeks flushed though she had no idea why and she took a single step back. "I-I'm sorry I didn't mean to disturb -"
He held one hand in the air to stop her. "That's perfectly alright." He turned momentarily to the clip board on his lap, jotted down a few things and then rose from his seat approaching Emma. "I was just nearly done anyway. Are you his wife?"
Emma's eyes widened and a small sound bubbled from her throat as she shook her head. "N-no...um, no...we're just...we're just friends."
"I'm sorry." The doctor apologized. "I had just assumed..." He trailed off his thought and then stuck out his hand, once again smiling. "My name is Dr. Manning, I'm Mr. Schuester's attending doctor."
Emma stared at his hand awkwardly, her brow furrowing in concentration but then she shuddered quietly and lifted her eyes back to his face. "How is he?"
Dr. Manning's hand fell back to his side and he shrugged off Emma's disregard for his friendly gesture and sighed, flipping open the chart. "Well, his body temperature is 96.2 which is an improvement but not as good as it should be. When he wakes up we'll try placing him in a tub of hot water that usually raises the body temperature quite significantly in cases like these."
Emma nodded quietly, finally for the first time since she entered the room taking a glance over to Will. He looked a little less pale than he had the day before but his lips were stick tainted a sickly blue color. "When will he wake up?" She asked in a near whisper.
"It's hard to say exactly." Dr. Manning replied also looking over his shoulder at Will. "It could be a few hours or it could be a couple more days it all depends on how well his body can heal itself. I couldn't get an accurate look at his body structure, raising his body temperature is our first priority but I couldn't help but notice that he looked rather thin." He glanced back to Emma whose face had instantly grown pale.
"Is this normal for him? Do you know if he's been eating well lately?"
Emma closed her eyes, feeling tears gather there shamefully and she shrugged helplessly. "I-I don't know." She whimpered quietly and then cleared her throat trying to keep her voice even. "We work together but we haven't really seen much of each other since Christmas vacation..."
"Is he depressed at all?"
Emma felt like she was suddenly stabbed in the heart and she fought her tears violently as she nodded her head. "Yes." She whispered brokenly. "He's um-" Her voice cracked as she swallowed over the lump in her throat. "He's going through a bad break up."
"Lady troubles, hm?" Dr. Manning shook his head. "Those are the worst kind."
Emma wasn't sure why she kept talking but the words kept flying out of her mouth out of control. "His ex, who he is still in love with, married another man."
Dr. Manning hissed through his teeth. "Ouch, that's rough. Lucky he's got a friend like you to support him though, huh?" He flashed a smile at her and she chocked back a sob, nodding quietly.
"Well, I've got to make my rounds but I'll be back in a couple hours to check on him. If he wakes up or if there are any changes at all just press that little button over there," he pointed to a button on the wall next to Will's bed, "and a nurse will come and get me."
Emma could do nothing but nod her head in understand. Dr. Manning gave her a reassuring smile before he left the room leaving Emma alone in the eerie room.
A single tear rolled down her cheek and she didn't even bother wiping it away as she made her way over to Will's bed. Will's left arm was hanging over the tops of the blankets and Emma concluded that Dr. Manning had fixed something with his IV and had forgotten to slip it back under the blanket.
Biting down on her lip softly Emma slowly reached out and caressed her fingertips over his pale wrist.
One of the things she loved about Will was that his hands were always warm. Up until Carl, Will was the only one she allowed to hold her hand and every time he did her body would become filled with the warmth that radiated off his hands. The warmth protected her, made her feel safe, made her feel at home.
But his hands were now cold as ice, it was like the life had been literally sucked from them. She flipped his hand around slowly and traced the inside of his palm lightly and brushed her fingers against each of his calloused fingertips. She trailed one finger up the length of his arm to the curve of his elbow and then flattened her palm against his upper arm. Underneath her light grip she could feel his relaxed muscles and in a few brief flashes, she remembered the times when those strong arms held her lovingly.
Another tear dripped from her eye as she gently took his arm and tucked it safely under the blankets careful to avoid the wires in his arm.
She focused her gaze on his face and let out a shuddering sigh. "I'm sorry." She whispered and scoffed quietly. "I know I've said that a million times already but...I'll say it for the rest of my life if I have to."
She brought her shaky hand to rest on the side of his face where his scruff tickled her skin and then she moved to move a few stray, over grown curls away from his forehead.
"I don't understand it, Will." She whispered to his still form, shaking her head. "I don't understand why you would torture yourself like this...over me. You don't deserve me, Will. You deserve a whole lot better." She whimpered quietly as she ran her fingers through his curls lightly. "What I wouldn't give to take your pain away..."
Her hand gently settled onto his shoulder and she leaned over pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "Please be okay." She whispered against his cool flesh, a few more tears dripping onto his hair and she moved her head to bury in the crook of his neck.
For hours the only time Emma left Will's side was to use the bathroom and that was only when she could not hold it in any longer ( she shuddered at the thought of using a hospital bathroom).
Dr. Manning came in with a nurse and checked Will's vitals and was pleased to report that his temperature went up by .4 degrees which was a very good thing in just a matter of a few hours and if things kept progressing that way then Will would be waking up before they knew it.
A few nurses came in regularly after Dr. Manning's visit to keep checking on Will and a few tried to convince Emma to eat something, even offering to bring something up from the hospital cafeteria.
The thought of eating repulsed Emma and not just because it came from a hospital. The nausea in her stomach hadn't ceased since she found out about Will's condition the day before but at seeing how pale Emma was actually getting the nurse brought up a tray of food, setting a tray up next to Will's bed just incase Emma decided to eat.
She didn't.
She couldn't.
It was nearing the evening and Emma was just about ready to pass out when she heard a sound that sent a thrill through her body.
A blip.
A slight increase in the constant beeping of Will's heart monitor. She sat up straight and watched Will carefully, searching for any signs of movement.
A hand flew to her mouth as his eye's fluttered slightly and she inched closer to the bed.
"Will?" She called out quietly, her lips twitching in a hopeful smile.
His forehead twitched and his eyes fluttered again.
Her heart pounded wildly in her chest as she watched Will. His eyes fluttered some more, his brow furrowed, his head tilted to one side and a small puff of air escaped his lips.
His head turned more towards her and slowly his eye lids fluttered open revealing his dull but still beautiful hazel eyes.
She whimpered his name against her hand and his eyes squinted a bit as they roamed over her quietly. His lips pursed and then his tongue shot out between his lips and he licked his dry, cold lips and visibly swallowed.
"Emma?" His voice was hoarse but it was recognizable and it sent flutters to her heart. Her throat closed up with emotion so she could only nod, a tearful smile pulling at her lips.
He blinked quietly and his head moved forward as he glanced around the room and then settled back on Emma. "I must be dreaming." He mumbled to himself.
Emma shook her head quietly, searching for his hand on top of the blankets and squeezing it lightly. "You're not dreaming, Will."
Will's eyes searched her tearful ones and a smile began to tug at his lips. "You're here."
Emma nodded vigorously, the smile spreading across her face. "I'm here."
His weak smile brightened for a moment before his face fell and he once again glanced around the room. "Where am I?"
Emma's smile fell and she bit her lip lightly. "You're um - you're in the hospital, Will."
His questioning gaze fell on her. "Why?"
Emma swallowed over the lump in her throat. "You don't remember?"
Will furrowed his brow and shook his head slowly. "No."
"What do you remember?" She asked hesitantly, almost afraid of his answer.
Will frowned in thought for a few silent moments and then he suddenly sprung up, catching Emma by surprise. "Sectionals!" He exclaimed and a sudden chill ran down her spine and he turned to her with wide eyes. "Emma, the kids have sectionals this weekend." He suddenly shivered violently and slithered back under the warm covers still keeping his anxious gaze on her.
Emma closed her eyes tightly, wincing quietly. It was her worst nightmare coming true.
"It's January, Will." She explained quietly, opening her eyes to look at him and tried to smile. "Your kids won, well actually they tied but they're moving on to regionals."
"We won?" His eyes lit up and her heart broke at what she knew was coming soon. She had to tell him or he'd remember on his own but either one brought the nausea back to her stomach.
"Yeah," She whispered with a small hesitant smile and squeezed his hand again, "You won."
His smile brightened as he stared into her eyes and then slowly his eyes travelled down to where her hand rested over his through the blankets.
His smile instantly faded as he stared at the ring on her finger, his face contorting in confusion and then his lips parted slightly as realization suddenly dawned on him.
Emma brought her right hand over her left, covering the ring she was now ashamed to wear and tearfully looked at Will's face. She nearly burst into sobs at the look of heart break clouding his eyes, the same look she had seen that day in her office.
Will slowly pulled his hand out from under hers bring it up to rest over his chest and eventually met her eyes. Her apology was written in her red rimmed, wide eyes and she shook her head slowly.
"What are you doing here, Emma?" He asked quietly, the life now completely gone from his voice.
"I-I'm here to see you, Will." She squeaked. "I wanted to make sure you were okay."
"I'm fine." He answered coldly. "You shouldn't be here, Emma. I'm sure Carl is worried sick about you."
With a little icy glare he slowly flipped himself onto his side, turning his back to Emma and pulling the covers up to his chin.
"Will, I don't care." She whispered, reaching out to touch his shoulder. "I don't care what he thinks."
Will tensed at her touch, remained still and silent for a good thirty seconds and then spoke evenly, "Please go, Emma."
She withdrew her hand sharply as if she had just touched a scolding hot stove and hurt washed over her features.
She knew she deserved it though. She deserved his coldness, his hate and she couldn't bare to break his heart any further.
A few tears rolled down her cheeks despite her desperate attempts to keep them at bay as she slowly backed away from his bed.
"Goodbye Will." She whispered brokenly before slowly walking out of the room.
Will stared at the plain white wall ahead of him, shivering quietly even under the heavy blankets, and hot tears burned his eyes.
It would hurt like hell later on but if he was being honest with himself all he wanted was for Emma to come running back in, take him into her arms and never let him go.