Two weeks later
Shuniku's team is sore, sleep deprived and sour when they pass the village gates.
She takes it upon herself to register her and her teammates return with the gatekeepers. Mostly because she doesn't trust the others not to chat up the guards unnecessarily - but also because they bailed on her with nothing more than a huff as soon as they touched village ground.
"Are you happy now?"
Everyone except for Anko, who is instead following her to the Hokage tower. What she actually means is, whether or not Shuniku still thinks finishing the mission early was worth it to push the squad to their limit speed wise as well as cutting breaks; aka being a tyrant.
Shuniku is so used to ignoring the complaints, she almost doesn't hear Anko talking.
When Anko throws a nut at her, she grunts. "Do I look happy to you?"
"I honestly can't tell the difference anymore."
Shuniku sends her a glare.
Anko ignores it. "I don't understand why you stress so much."
"Easy for you to say, you don't have to worry about your house being blown up by a prank gone wrong."
"In that case you can only blame his upbringing," Anko teases, but noticing the deathglare Shuniku is sending her full force this time, she continues with more empathy, "I'm sure the brat is fine. I mean he's, like what? Ten?-"
"Twelve."
"Clearly old enough not to kill himself by accident," Anko finishes, sounding optimistic.
Shuniku does not feel very optimistic.
She already checked on Naruto's chakra, of course, as soon as they were close enough to the village for her not to strain herself too much. And as far as she could tell from such a distance, he seemed to be fine and where he was supposed to be. Sitting his ass off in the academy.
But that doesn't mean the same applies for her apartment.
Shuniku sighs. "I'm kind of too tired to deal with you right now." But what she actually means to say is 'Stop following me.'
"Dont be an asshole," Anko says, but with affection, "I only want to make sure you don't rip anyone's head off at the office."
While Shuniku undoubtedly has a temper, it's not her style to hit people for it. She guesses Anko means she wants to prevent her from blowing up in Lord Third's face, in case he criticizes her parenting again.
Which is nice, Shuniku figures.
So she bears with Anko trailing close behind her on her way to the mission administration office, where she can get her report to the Third over with.
To Anko's joy the Third is out of office this morning, which means Shuniku can submit the short mission report she wrote during the few and short breaks on their way home to the responsible clerk without any comment whatsoever. To Shuniku's dismay she'll have to come back and report to the hokage at a later time.
After that Anko finally leaves her alone and Shuniku can walk home in peace and a general feeling of apprehension.
The feeling doesn't betray her, because she soon notices two chakra signatures, that while indeed familiar, have no business to be in her home. Especially not without her there.
So she rushes to her apartment. She takes the door, despite preferring the shortcut via window, just to point out that she appreciates good manners and does not in fact welcome people to break into her house.
The two men look at her, completely unsurprised.
"Welcome home," the Third greets her warmly, a kind smile on his face.
The Hokage is standing by her little 'dining area' - a wooden table that separates the small kitchen from the living room. Clad in his red and white robes he should look out of place next to all the dirty dishes, food wrappers and whatnots that clutter all the surfaces she could see from the door. However, the way he's standing there, posture relaxed with one hand resting on the back of a chair, leaves Shuniku wondering if the old man would've helped himself to some tea, had Naruto left any clean cups to drink from.
He looks as if he was feeling right at home - like he owns the place.
Which one could argue he does in a way, because he pays a part of the rent - a very little part, but that still doesn't give him any right to just let himself in whenever he pleases.
Feeling miffed, Shuniku doesn't return the smile.
The Hokage however keeps his friendly tone when he asks, "How was the mission?"
"Good," Shuniku says curtly, stepping into the living room after exchanging her shoes for slippers. Trying not to seem distressed by the two intruders, she takes her time to unclasp her weapon pouch and puts it with her backpack to join the mess on the coffee table in front of the couch. "Why are you here? With him?."
She takes a pointed look at one Kakashi Hatake.
The sight of him so casually standing there with his hands buried in his pockets, in the middle of her living spaces, is a vision right out of her nightmares. His chakra, as cold as ever, sends uncomfortable chills over her skin like a bad omen.
She doesn't want him where her nephew sleeps.
"Hi," Kakashi says, lifting one of his hands in an effortless greeting. His exposed eye crinkles in a smile while she studies him.
Shuniku grimaces.
Then an alarming thought comes to her mind and her heart drops down to her stomach.
Turning to the Third, she blurts out, "What did the kid do this time?"
Her mind fills with terrifying scenarios of what Naruto could have possibly done in her absence that would justify the hokage to tresspass her home together with that horrible man. Did the kid attack him? Did he set fire to his house? Is the Third trying to calm Kakashi down, by showing him the kid is only a result of poor parenting and therefore can't be blamed for his foolery-
"He stole a scroll with a forbidden jutsu."
That's not what she expected.
She blinks uselessly at the hokage. "What? Why?" She asks incredulously. Then even more importantly, "How?"
"I don't think those are the questions you should be asking right now," the old man says, his tone heavy with accusation.
Oh, hell no.
She is not taking responsibility for scrolls containing forbidden jutsu being stolen by a twelve year old. And a very average one at that. Had she raised some prodigious bastard like Kakashi, then maybe. A top notch killer machine like the Uchiha boy that wiped out his entire clan in one night, most likely. A dorky prankster like Naruto, absolutely not. That one is on the hokage. She was not here to have an eye on him.
"No, no, no. You can't blame me for that," Shuniku snarls, suddenly angry. "You sent me on that long ass mission. And where were the Anbu that are supposed to keep an eye on him when I'm not around? Why didn't they stop him?"
The Third looks at her for a moment, calm and unconcerned. Then he says, "We decided it was no longer necessary to have him be checked on constantly, about half a year ago. I just didn't tell you until now, so you would be more focused on your missions. I know how much you worry."
Shuniku crosses her arms, staring at him. She knows he actually means, he didn't want her to annoy him with it. She contemplates for a moment whether or not to do exactly that now or to instead show she's a mature adult and let it pass without further comment.
"I don't understand why he needed to be stopped anyway? You can't tell me a kid like Naruto managed to sneak into the scroll vault," Shuniku wonders, still unsatisfied with his lack of explanation. "Why wasn't it guarded better? Why do you send me on missions to collect scrolls if you don't guard them appropriately? That just makes them easier to take."
The Hokage fixes her with his gaze, his stern expression betraying his annoyance with her more than rolling his eyes could do. "He had help, obviously," he says, completely ignoring her accusations about the apparent lack of security of the scroll vault.
Shuniku raises her eyebrow in something between disbelief and curiosity.
Before she can make a snarky remark though, the Hokage continues, "It's already dealt with, so no need to concern yourself with it. The scrolls are perfectly safe."
"So, what? Is the kid in trouble now or why are you here? Do you want me to ground him?"
"While that would certainly be the sensible thing to do, I doubt it will be necessary. I'm sure he learned his lesson."
Shuniku furrows her brows at that, wondering what kind of discipline Naruto had to submit to for this stunt. She side-eyes Kakashi and asks varily, "What does Kakashi have to do with it?"
"I wanted Kakashi to have a better idea of Naruto's home life," the old man says this as if it's an everyday thing to give random high class assassins a tour of her house. Like it's a zoo exhibit of the Nine Tails' vessel.
Slightly confused, but mostly upset, Shuniku asks, "What for?"
Then a terrible thought comes to her mind. Her blood feels cold in her veins, and the feeling of dread she had before comes back full force. "You didn't put him on watch duty, did you?"
"No, he'll lead Naruto's new genin squad."
That's so much worse.
Her stomach curdles with panic. Out of all the people he could have chosen, he chooses Friendkiller Kakashi Hatake.
No. No. No. No. No.
"Absolutely not!" Shuniku snaps, "I won't allow it!"
The Third blinks at her, looking almost surprised by her sudden outburst for a second, before he rearranges his expression into that of gentle indifference. He says sternly, "I don't need you to allow me anything, Shuniku."
"I'm Naruto's legal guardian." That surely must warrant something.
"And I'm the Hokage of this village," the Third reminds her, his tone slightly amused, "and I decided on Kakashi as Naruto's sensei."
"Then decide again," she demands stubbornly. "Pick someone else."
"I'm not going to do that," the old man says patiently.
"I don't want him anywhere near the kid."
"To be honest, Shuniku, I don't really care about what you want." His tone is almost harsh this time, signaling the end of the conversation.
Shuniku presses her lips together. Of course he doesn't care about her wants, she's already aware of that. There are quite a few things Shuniku would like to tell him regarding that. But she can't. The hokage had made sure of that.
Kakashi clears his throat after he kept silent for the entirety of Shuniku giving her contempt for him to full disclosure. His eyes scan the room in a way, which Shuniku in her current mood can only interpret as judgey.
Suddenly she is very aware of the load of unwashed dishes in the sink and on the counter tops, the questionable amount of empty plastic cups of instant ramen on the kitchen and coffee table and all kinds of other stuff from dirty clothes to candy wrappers littering all kinds of surfaces. The room's a hot mess, to say it lightly. A pigsty at best.
Shuniku knows she's raising a slob, but until now the mess has never had an audience. At least not one that made her feel embarrassed about it.
Warmths creeps up her cheeks and neck and she feels the urge to tell Kakashi that she hasn't been home in two weeks. But then she remembers she shouldn't have to explain herself to someone who she didn't invite inside her home in the first place.
"Maybe," Kakashi says, already coming off condescending in Shuniku's opinion, though he might plainly be bored, "You shouldn't bother getting upset about things you can't change and instead focus on the things which are actually in need of your attention."
Yes, definitely condescending.
He picks up the milk carton off the kitchen table and gives it a bit of a shake, so yucky sounds come from inside of it and even with his mask on she can see he's scrunching up his nose. She knows the milk clumped up before he tells her.
"This milk is expired."
Her face feels hot. Oh, how she hates him.
Maybe Anko shouldn't have left her alone after all, she might end up ripping Kakashi's head off.
With her hands pulled into fists, Shuniku stalks towards Kakashi, unceremoniously ripping the milk carton out of his hand and snarls, "Nobody asked you!"
Then she turns on her heels to throw the milk carton in the trash can - with so much force, the trash can almost tips over, rattling over the hardwood floor. With her back still turned to him she demands, "Now, get out of my house."
Kakashi leaves without even the hint of a sound, that's how good of a shinobi he is. The only reason Shuniku even notices him leaving, is because a short moment after her request she feels the chilly aura of his chakra make a sudden leap from her kitchen to down the street, away from her. Finally.
Unfortunately the hokage stays behind. Shuniku would love to tell him the request included him as well, but that seems a little bit too rude, even for her.
With a sigh, Shuniku turns around to face the old man again. "You could at least-"
"Let's talk about your mission."
Trying her hardest not to roll her eyes, Shuniku pushes the mess of Naruto's dinner leftovers (she thinks) on the kitchen counter to the side, so she can safely lean against it without getting food on her clothes. With Kakashi finally leaving, she doesn't feel so insecure about her mess of a home anymore.
Making herself comfortable, leaning against the counter with her legs crossed, she finds back to her professionalism. "We got the scrolls. No casualties. The full report is submitted already and the scrolls should be in the vault by now." The corner of her mouth twitches. "Unless, of course, a twelve year old got their hands on them."
The hokage clears his throat, indicating that he doesn't appreciate the cheekiness. "Do you think they are legitimate this time?" he asks.
Shuniku shrugs her shoulders. "They seem authentic from the outside, though I can't tell until I look inside. They could be very good mockups." It wouldn't be the first time Shuniku was sent to retrieve a sealing scroll, only to find out later during closer examination that they are just really well done fakes. It happens more often than not.
The Third nods. "Please, get to deciphering them as soon as possible."
"I'll start tomorrow," She says, this time rolling her eyes. "But don't think I finished arguing about the sensei situation yet."
The old man sighs, suddenly looking tired, and dryly says, "I'll see you tomorrow then." With that he leaves, just as fast and silent as Kakashi did before.
Shuniku slumps her shoulders as the tension of the last two weeks finally leaves her body.
She's home at last.
She steps into the living room and turns around in a circle, taking in the chaos of the place in its entirety for the first time. After a quick peek into Naruto's room she realises that it doesn't look much better, though she doesn't really care about the state of his room, so long as it's livable and not dirty dirty. The kid thrives in chaos and that's fine for her. She, however, likes her living quarters to be somewhat presentable.
Shuniku takes the trash can and starts collecting the empty ramen cups and other trash. Having Naruto do that himself, or at least help her with it, would be a better method of education, but she doesn't want to sit and wait for him to come back, surrounded by this mess. Besides, she's still upset about the Hokage's decision to choose Kakashi - of all people - as Naruto's sensei and doing nothing seems unbearable to her at the moment.
So she cleans the entire place. In her frenzy she even tackles Naruto's room, telling herself that him looking for his things for the next two weeks will be his punishment for trashing the house and stealing top secret scrolls.
When every room is spotless, all surfaces are shiny, Naruto's laundry is in the washing machine and she herself is freshly showered, Shuniku notices that she hasn't seen a single one of their pictures.
At first she thought that maybe Naruto had invited Chouji and that Nara boy over that he sometimes hangs out with - and being embarrassed about his toddler pictures he had put them in her room to hide them from his pals. But her room was left untouched. Which normally doesn't wonder Shuniku, since half the drawers and doors of her dresser and wardrobe - where she keeps all of her weapons, scrolls, explosive tags and all of the other stuff that she doesn't want Naruto to have unsupervised access to - have been sealed shut ever since Naruto was able to open drawers. And the rest of the storage space is filled with her clothes and other things that are usually too boring for Naruto to snoop around.
So when she didn't find the pictures anywhere else in the house, she was left feeling strange about it.
To distract herself Shuniku goes out to buy groceries for dinner, since the fridge is tellingly empty.
Shuniku is in the middle of preparing dinner, when Naruto comes home.
Dropping the knife she cuts the carrots with, she rushes to the small entrance area and pulls Naruto into a hug before he even has a chance to take his shoes off.
"I've missed you," she says, peppering kisses all over his face.
His shoulders go stiff in her arms and he squirms away from her with a pained expression, which strikes her as odd, though she tries not to take it personally. Maybe he reached that age, when getting hugs and kisses from your aunt is embarrassing, while she was gone. The same thing happened last year, when he suddenly threw a fit when she entered the bathroom while he was bathing, after being away on a four day mission. Needless to say, she has been banned from entering the bathroom while he's in it ever since. Regardless of whether or not she changed pretty much every single one of his diapers.
She steps away, to take him in.
"Look at you!" Shuniku swoons, admiring the brand new forehead protector where his goggles used to sit. Naruto polished it to a shine, which creates a total contrast to his majorly wrinkled training suit and the wild mess of blond that is his hair. It makes her smile. Despite the kid's earlier squirmishness, Shuniku pulls him into another hug. "You're a genin, now! Congrats!"
Naruto pushes her off of him, an expression on his face that she can't put her finger on.
"What?" she asks amused, ruffling his messy hair. "Now that you're a genin, you're too cool to hug your old auntie?"
He swats her hand away. "Stop that."
Shuniku frowns at the unusual harshness of his tone. "Sorry for being proud of my nephew," she says defensively. Then adds almost whiny, "Who I haven't seen in two weeks, by the-"
"Don't call me that." Naruto interrupts her sharply, distinctively looking past her.
Okay …?
Shuniku raises her eyebrows at him, wondering whether this is just a show of average puberty or if he's actually upset with her for being gone for so long. "What's up with the attitude?"
Naruto fixes her with a look and Shuniku is taken aback by his eyes shooting daggers at her. He isn't upset, he's angry.
"You don't have to pretend anymore," he says, sounding almost hostile, "I know everything."
Both confused and pissed by the kid's uncharacteristic rudeness on top of her overall exhaustion from her mission, she feels tempted to send him straight to bed. But something in his eyes has her hesitating. She had seen it in the mirror before.
Cautiously, she asks, "... like what?"
Naruto's scowl deepens and hurt flashes over his features, making her reach out to him once more, but again he swats her hand away.
"You're not really my aunt and I'm just your mission!" he snaps.
Her heart feels like it dropped down to her feet, no, out of her body and if she didn't know better, she would believe it stopped beating altogether. Never in a thousand lifetimes would Shuniku have thought to be forced by the kid to have this conversation. Not like this, at least. It's not supposed to be like that.
Looking at Naruto's resentful face, Shuniku tries to swollow down the lump in her throat - in vain.
How does one answer an accusation like that? An accusation that is true in every way and then not at all at the same time. What could she possibly say to make everything go back to the way it was before she left for that stupid mission? How could she possibly save this situation?
Think. Think. Think!
A hysterical little laugh escapes her lips unwillingly, before Shuniku can ask, "How did you come up with this bullshit?"
Wrong. Thing. To. Say.
"Stop lying!" Naruto looks ready to punch her. "I know it's true! I know you're only pretending that we're family, so you can keep an eye on the Nine Tails!"
Dear god. Why does he know about that, too?
This is wrong. This is absolutely wrong.
Shuniku blinks at Naruto stupidly, completely stunned by his words. "That's not true-"
"Shut up!" Naruto spits and Shuniku can't help but flinch a little. "You're supposed to make sure the Nine Tails stays inside of my body. It's your mission, I know it!"
Then it's almost like a flip switches inside of her and her initial shock turns into anger.
Who dared to tell him all that? She's the one who was supposed to tell him, in a way he would understand, and together with Lord Third, so he could explain the things she can't.
Besides - this is confidential information.
Confidential enough to get people killed.
At least that's what she's been threatened with.
"Who said that to you?" she demands.
"It doesn't matter, everyone knows about it," he tells her coldly.
"It's not like that-"
Interrupting her once again, Naruto storms past her into the living room. There he charges for her bedroom, tears the door open with such force it loudly slams against the dresser inside the room. Right on his heels Shuniku watches as the boy yanks open her closet and pulls out her backpack.
"You can move out now," he declares, throwing the backpack at her. Shuniku stares at him in silent horror as he grabs a handful of clothes out of the closet and throws them at her. She doesn't even bother to catch anything. "I'm a genin now, so you can keep tabs on me from outside without having to babysit me."
What the fuck is happening?
The audacity this kid has. The lack of respect.
Had she thrown her sister's clothes in her face like that, she would have gotten her ass whooped until she wouldn't have been able to sit for a week.
Shuniku had failed him miserably.
She scoffs and asks incredulously, "I can move out? Who do you think pays the bills?"
"Lord Third," Naruto says with the same confidence he would have, had she asked him about the weather.
Shuniku snorts at that. "His money doesn't even cover half of the rent. How do you want to pay for everything else?"
"With the money I'll get from doing missions."
Shuniku laughs. "Well, don't expect to make a fortune, Genin missions don't pay well."
Naruto huffs. "Then I'll ask Lord Third for a loan, as long as you're not living here anymore."
"He won't give you a loan."
That man didn't even give her a loan to restore the house Shuniku's family lived in, before it got destroyed during the attack of the demon fox. Which is really the only reason her and Naruto are living in this crammed flat in the first place. Had Shuniku been able to restore the old house, they would be having an entirely different argument now.
"And you don't honestly think you could live on your own?" she adds sarcastically.
"I can totally live on my own! I did perfectly fine, when you were gone," Naruto proclaims, making Shuniku laugh bitterly. He shoots her his most disdainful look and spats, "I don't need you!"
The laughter gets stuck in her throat. What a kick in the teeth.
Shuniku stares at him, hurt and in disbelive, feeling weirdly insulted. When his eyes stay fierce instead of showing guilt or regret, she gets upset.
It doesn't matter to her whether this is a puberty related hissy fit or a justified tantrum. She's not having it.
Call it late, but she's going to put her foot down.
"You call trashing the place like you did, perfectly fine? Who will keep this place clean after you kicked me out, huh? Ever thought about that?" she asks with a big fat load of sarcasm, gesturing towards the living room.
He opens his mouth to shoot back, but she's faster. "I just spent the whole afternoon cleaning up after you." And he thanks her by being a total brat.
"I didn't ask you to do that!" Naruto shouts at the top of his voice.
Children are the most ungrateful creatures this world has to offer, it seems. Shuniku was aware that parenting was an unappreciated job, but this takes the cake.
"What?" she yells back, "Was I supposed to sit in this pigsty, waiting for you to kick me out?!"
Furious, Naruto kicks a piece of clothes at her, which then lands on the floor in front of her feet. "Just leave!"
"You can't kick me out, kid. My name's on the lease."
"Fine!" He marches towards the door in big, stubborn steps. "Then I'll leave!"
Before he can pass her, Shuniku takes hold of his arm. "No, you won't."
"Let go!" He struggles against her grip.
Keeping hold of his arm she turns him around, so she can look in his eyes and says in her strictest tone, "You will stay here, where I can see you."
"You can't force me!" Naruto hisses, trying to pry her fingers from his arm with his free hand. But her grasp stays firm.
"Yes, I can. I'm your legal guardian."
"I'm not your child!"
"I adopted you, so on paper you are," she says, her anger settling into mild irritation.
Naruto in his attempt to free himself, somehow manages to lift two of her fingers that clasp around his arm, twisting her knuckles painfully. As she can't keep hold of his arm like that, without accidentily hurting him as well, she swiftly spins him around, holding both of his arms behind his back now. Naruto yelps in surprise and she leads him outside of her room towards his bedroom door.
"Now go to your room," Shuniku commands.
Naruto at first resumes his struggle against her hold on him, digging his heels into the hardwood floor to try and slow them down. But after a moment he gives in, eventually walking towards his room without any resistance.
"If I sense your chakra outside of this apartment, I'll seal your window shut, got it?" she warns him, letting go of his arms.
Naruto spitefully sprints the last few steps to his room. The loud slam of his bedroom door tells her he understood her warning.
"Don't slam the door!"
Bang!
He did it again.
Needless to say, her parenting had failed big time. How much she would have preferred it, had the kid burned down their apartment complex by accident.
A/N: Thank you guys so much for all the lovely comments! They always make my day!