A/N: Okay, so I'm starting the story in this chapter. AND, THIS WILL BE A PARODY/CRACK FANFIC! It will be written in script format, just so you know. And, flame me, or review. ALSO, IF YOU REVIEW, YOU WILL GET YOUR NAME WRITTEN IN THE SPECIAL THANKS
I wrote this quite a long time ago, and I'm posting it here because I just deleted a sucky story. :)
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Naruto. I wonder why people hate Twilight so much. Is it because almost everyone in Twilight is beautiful, and they're not? Or is it because of the plot…I don't like the plot too much myself. But it's mostly because the romance is a bit messed up. But eh, what do I care?
TWILIGHT: NARUTO VERSION
Preface
Sakura: I've never gave much thought to how I would die.
*Camera shakes violently*
Deer: *Runs*
Sakura: *Starts boring monologue*
*Camera shakes even more violently*
Deer: *Runs*
Sakura: *Still going on with boring monologue*
Deer: ! *Gets killed by a mysterious person in a hoodie and jeans*
*Camera still shaking violently*
Sakura: *End boring monologue *
Director: Why do I get the feeling that the deer had nothing to do with the monologue?
Phoenix, Arizona
Sakura Swan: Oh, I'm going to move to Forks.
Sakura: And I'm going to take this cactus with me. *Picks up cactus and hugs it*
Sakura: Bye bye, Arizona! *Still hugging cactus*
In Charlie's Car
Charlie Swan: So…
Sakura: so… *Still hugging cactus*
Swan House
Charlie: *Stalks Sakura up stairs* Oh yeah, and there's only one bathroom
Sakura: Oh. *Obviously thinking, Oh, SHIT! ONE BATHROOM!*
Sakura: Kay then.*STILL HUGGING CACTUS*
Charlie: *Disappears magically*
Sakura: Small room…*Looks around room, obviously thinking it sucks*
*Car horn honks outside*
Sakura: *Looks out window then rushes (and trips) down stairs*
Charlie: Hey Sakura, you remember Fugaku?
Fugaku Black: *Wearing cowboy hat and looking uncomfortable* Hey Sakura!
Sakura: Uhm…
Charlie: Oh yeah, he's in a wheelchair now, so the truck's yours.
Sakura: Oh! I LOVE IT! *Obviously thinking it needs a paint job*
*Charlie and Fugaku go play on the road*
Neji Black: Hey, remember me?
Sakura: You…?
Neji: We used to make mudpies together.
Sakura: *Obviously creeped out by the mudpie comment* Uh…ok?
Next day, at Forks High School
Sakura: *Parks ugly car and tries not to notice people staring at her*
Lady at the office: *Smiles and is thinking OMG! ITS SAKURA SWAN!*
Sakura: …
Lee Yorkie: Heyy! You must be Sakuraka Swan!
Sakura: Sakura's fine, thanks. *obviously creeped out by that zit*
Lee: So, I'm like, the ears and eyes of this place.
Sakura: Oh, yeah.
Lee: And I work for the newspaper.
Sakura: Oh, yeah.
Lee: Are you even listening to me?
Sakura: Oh, yeah.
Gym
Sakura: OUCH! *ball hits face*
*Everyone grumbles*
Sakura: I TOLD them not to give it to me.
Kiba Newton: Hey, you're Sakuraka Swan, right?
Sakura: Sakura's fine, thanks.
Kiba: *Checking her out*
Ino Stanley: *In a overly happy voice* HIII!
Cafeteria
Ino: So…
*Everyone starts talking randomly*
Eric: So, about the newspaper
Temari Weber: *randomly comes in and takes a picture*
Sakura: EEEK! NO PICTURES! PLEASEEE!
Temari: Aw, guess we'll have to do the article on penguins again.
Eric: So, you've met Sakura, my girl.
Kiba: Your girl? She's my girl.
Sakura: *Ignores the fools*
*Vampires are in slow-mo 'cause that makes them seem cooler*
Sakura: Who are they?
Ino: Oh, they're the Uchihas. They all live…
*CUE SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC*
Ino: T.O.G.E.T.H.E.R. .. . Together. TOGETHER!
Sakura: Ew, spaz out away from me.
Ino: Minato Uchiha adopted all of them. Like, Kushina Uchiha can't give birth or something.
Ino: AND THEY ALL LIVE TOGETHERR!
Sakura: …You already said that.
Ino: That girl, that's Yugao, and that's Kakashi. They're like, a thing.
*Yugao and Kakashi are walking in slo mo*
Sakura: *nods*
Ino: That short one's Hinata, and the one that looks overly constipated is Naruto.
*Hinata and Naruto are walking in slo mo*
Sakura: *nods* Who's that?
*Sasuke is walking in slo mo*
Ino: Oh, that's Sasuke, but apparently, no one here's good enough for him.
Sakura: …
Sasuke: *Smiling awkwardly, and then looks at Sakura*
Sakura: Ooohhkayyy then.
Mr. Molina's Class
Mr. Molina: Hey, my name's Mr. Molina! I randomly changed my name from Mr. Banner to Mr. Molina cause I wanted my name to sound Hispanic!
Sakura: *Steps in front of fan with yellow stripes*
*Fan with yellow stripes blows*
Sakura: *Hair blows around*
Sasuke: *Holds his nose and looks like he's going to puke*
Sakura: Do I smell bad?
Sakura: *Gets into seat*
Sasuke: *Pushes over water-DRUGS!-*
Sakura: Okay?
Sasuke: *EVIL GLARE and FLINCH* You…you….you…you…you…
A/N: CLIFFYHANGER! xD Next part coming out soon.
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