Chapter Twenty-Seven

Disclaimer: I do not own KotOR.

"You know, I didn't even want to come in here in the first place," Jolee complained as they made their way down the hallway that would lead them to Bastila…and the console that would shut down the disruptor beam. But mostly Bastila.

"Well, you went along with Carth's plan easily enough," Revan pointed out.

"So did you," Jolee countered.

Revan shrugged. "Well, Carth and I have been travelling together for the past several months now and I know that he'd just keep complaining until he got his way and all his talking was distracting the Rakatan who were doing the ritual to let us in."

"I still can't believe Carth's great role in saving the galaxy is annoying you," Jolee marveled, shaking his head.

"He'll probably want to leave that bit out of the official story," Revan quipped.

"Even if you agreed for your own peace of mind, I really didn't need to," Jolee continued.

"I don't know, I've actually come around to the idea of you being here with me and now think that it was an inspired plan and we haven't even met Bastila yet," Revan said cheerfully.

"That's because you're making me do all the work!" Jolee complained.

Revan laughed. "Did you really expect anything else?"

"I guess not," Jolee admitted. "But I'm too old to be forced to solve ancient floor puzzles and fend off your crazy exes, damn it!"

"They were not my exes!" Revan objected hotly. "Well…not all of them, at any rate."

"…Which ones were and which ones weren't?" Jolee couldn't help but ask.

Revan smirked. "See, I could tell you but it's a lot more fun watching you wonder about it."

"Sadist," Jolee grumbled. He stopped short. "Revan, you know that right beyond this doorway lies Bastila, right?"

Revan nodded. "I think I can see her from here. In fact, she just waved at me."

"Well, you have to be prepared for the fact that she may have changed during her imprisonment," Jolee cautioned.

"You mean she might have turned evil and actually developed a sense of fashion and changed out of that ridiculous yellow eyesore despite the fact that Malak knows nothing about designs?" Revan asked rhetorically.

"Yes, like that," Jolee replied. "So be careful and remember: Not only will Carth never shut up if you turn evil but T3 will…do something that I don't exactly remember but seemed to upset you a great deal."

Revan nodded grimly. "Commit suicide, I know. Don't worry, I'll be fine." He thrust his shoulders back and strolled out to meet Bastila.

"Are you two done planning how this reunion is going to go?" Bastila asked politely.

"Were we planning something?" Revan asked blankly.

"Weren't you paying any attention at all?" Jolee asked, simultaneously annoyed that Revan apparently wasn't listening and still impressed that he managed to fake it so well. He hadn't even stuck to noncommittal noises or one-syllable answers.

"I tried," Revan insisted, "it's just that…damn, Bastila. You look amazing. Your skin, especially, is positively radiant."

Bastila smiled at that. "Why, thank you, Revan."

"It's a little-known fact but that was actually my second reason for insisting on wearing an outfit that covered every inch of my body," Revan confided. "The first of course was so that I could get away from all the responsibilities of being me and date girls that weren't terrified I'd kill them if they said the wrong thing."

"Oh, was the other that you had converted to a religion that required that of you?" Jolee guessed hopefully.

Revan shook his head. "The Sith aren't very big on religion; they think it takes away from the worship of power. Actually, the Jedi don't like it either and I can only assume it's because they hate individuality as they think it will lead to the dark side."

Bastila nodded. "Probably."

Revan just shook his head at her. "You agreeing with me is weird."

"Weird in a bad way?" Bastila asked, pouting a little.

Revan considered this. "I don't know. I'll get back to you on that. I was actually going to say that my second reason was because I have seen the dark side do some nasty things to one's skin and so even if mine was currently fine, I lived in constant fear that it wouldn't last. Malak, of course, looks like he has jaundice and then there's the matter of his jaw…but that's a different story."

"Why didn't you wait to cover up until after you began to notice your skin was having problems?" Bastila queried.

"Again, two reasons. First of all, if I did that then it would be really obvious when I turned up one day and wouldn't let anyone look at my skin what had happened. This way, it was just my gimmick and added to my mystique. Secondly, I was worried that I wouldn't notice when it first happened and someone else might see," Revan explained. "So I'm glad that your skin is doing okay, Bastila, but watch it very carefully."

Bastila nodded solemnly. "That sounds like excellent advice. Just what I'd expect from the most talented man in the galaxy."

Revan groaned. "Okay, who have you been talking to? Master Kae?"

"As much fun as you've been having catching up, we've got to get out of here!" Jolee cried out urgently.

"Why?" Revan asked, confused. "Does the barrier reseal itself and we'll be trapped?"

"No, worse," Jolee told him.

Revan opened his mouth again.

"No, it's even worse than that, too," Jolee assured him.

"You don't even know what I was going to say!" Revan protested.

"I don't need to to know that it's worse," Jolee returned. "Malak could be here any minute! Come on, Bastila, we've got to get out of here!"

Bastila and Revan exchanged 'he has got to be kidding' looks.

"Um…Jolee? I'm not trying to imply that because you're old you must be senile and I know that you're really sensitive about that," Revan began. "But maybe you could explain to me just what you think is happening here?"

"Obviously, Bastila managed to get great skin and a badass new outfit before escaping and stealing a ship and piloting it down to us here and was just waiting for us to come take her back to the Ebon Hawk where she belongs," Jolee replied matter-of-factly.

"…You know, we totally had a conversation about how evil she was. Kind of a lot, too. Now I'm starting to think you were the one who wasn't listening," Revan said, looking almost offended.

"Don't be silly, Revan. It's Bastila," Jolee said as if that explained everything. "She can't be evil."

"I kind of am," Bastila corrected. "I'm Malak's apprentice and everything."

"Sure you are," Jolee said soothingly. "Revan, she's clearly snapped under the strain of the last few weeks. We should sedate her once we get back to the ship and get her some professional help – preferably outside of the Jedi, damn the legalities – once this is over with."

Bastila's eye twitched. "I can still hear you."

"Bastila, does teaming up with Malak mean that you're going to try to kill me?" Revan asked worriedly. "I mean, I know that that's the way of the Sith and all but I had rather gotten used to not having the people around me plotting my death."

"I'm afraid that I am, Revan," Bastila confirmed. She almost sounded sad. "Unless…but I'm sure that you wouldn't be interested in it. It involves putting some actual effort into something."

"You're probably right," Revan agreed.

"…You weren't supposed to agree with me," Bastila whispered.

"But…you were right," Revan didn't get it. Oh, well. "What was I supposed to have done?"

"You're supposed to tell me that you wanted to know anyway," Bastila told him.

"Oh." Revan cleared his throat. "You don't know that, Bastila! Tell me what I must do to avoid having you try to kill me!"

"Malak is strong, yes," Bastila acknowledged. "And he's certainly infinitely more motivated than you'll ever be. Just the same, I can be as motivated as he and we all know that – assuming you pay attention and don't get hit in the back of the head by a heavy object–"

"That was one time!" Revan protested.

"Malak isn't even in your league," Bastila continued. "If you and I were to join forces, I could absolutely motivate you to take down your former apprentice and stop the station from being destroyed using my battle mediation. Together, we could conquer the galaxy!"

Revan remained skeptical. "I don't know, Bastila. How is that any different than the arrangement I had with Malak?"

"Well, you weren't regularly sleeping with Malak," Bastila said as if it were obvious.

"Presumably," Jolee added. "Though given his refusal to tell me who he had and had not been seeing, we really don't know, now do we?"

"There is that," Revan agreed. "And I probably wouldn't have to put up with Carth complaining anymore."

"We would kill him if he wouldn't stop," Bastila announced. "And we know that he wouldn't."

"I think Canderous and HK would be thrilled and Mission and Zaalbar probably wouldn't care," Revan mused. "Jolee doesn't like the word 'Sith' or the killing of babies so he'd be against it but he's technically neutral and even if he did side against us, he's old, so…"

"So is that a yes?" Bastila asked hopefully.

Revan winced. "I'd love to, Bastila, I really would. Having you manage an evil empire that I'm the figurehead for and not having to do much work at all sounds like paradise."

Bastila frowned. "I'm sensing a 'but.' Why am I sensing a 'but'?"

"It's just that T3 has threatened to erase his entire memory in order to rid himself of the pain of me turning evil!" Revan cried out, distraught. "And I think he really means it!"

"…You would let one stupid utility droid stand between you and your destiny?" Bastila asked flatly.

Revan gasped. "You…how could you even say that? It's like I don't even know you anymore. What has the dark side done to you?"

Whatever Bastila had been expecting, this was not it. She looked puzzled for a moment before groaning. "Of course. I forgot about your droid fetish."

"I do not have a droid fetish!" Revan argued.

Jolee snorted. "You are so far in denial it's not even funny."

"Please, Revan," Bastila said softly, her eyes pleading with him to go with her. "Please turn evil again for me."

Revan couldn't meet her eyes. "I'm sorry, Bastila. T3 is just too important to me."

"I can't believe you're breaking up with me for a droid," Bastila said disgustedly. "Actually, now that I think about it I really can. And that is just depressing. I'm leaving." She began to march back to her ship.

"Wait, Bastila!" Revan called after her. "I'm not dumping you, I just can't be evil!"

"And I can't be with a man who's not evil," Bastila said frigidly. "Good day, Revan. May you come to your senses when we meet again."

"Well, that went well," Jolee said dryly. "You know, I'm not so much surprised by the fact that you dumped Bastila for a utility droid as I am by the fact that it took you this long. Still, I suppose that at least it wasn't the assassin droid…"

Now Revan was really wishing he'd taken that offer. Damn T3 for being too adorable to enable his self-destruction.

"Well?" Carth demanded. "Where's Bastila?"

"She's evil now, remember?" Mission reminded him.

"Oh, right. And Jolee's still alive and Revan's not evil, I see," Carth remarked, stunned.

"Your lack of faith is still quite painful, Carth," Revan sniffed.

"I would apologize but I suspect that it was more T3's threat that did it rather than any moral inclination of yours," Carth said frankly.

"And you'd be right," Jolee confirmed.

"She accused me of dumping her for T3," Revan said glumly.

"Well, you kind of did," Zaalbar told him.

Revan glared at him. "So not helping."

"So I see that the disruptor beam is down," Carth noted. "And even though we really needed new parts for the ship that we didn't have, T3 and Canderous managed to get the ship working again anyway."

T3 beeped modestly and, for the sake of avoiding being laughed at again, Revan narrowly managed to refrain from gushing over how amazing he was.

"We are mechanic gods!" Canderous declared. "I'm thinking about trying to rebuild a basilisk war droid next."

"I am both highly skeptical and supremely terrified," Carth informed him.

"As well you should be," Canderous said approvingly.

"Much-needed interjection: it has been nearly eight hours since we landed here and I believe that is when the Republic meatbags were supposed to show up," HK hinted.

"As much as I don't want to agree with your assassin droid, Revan," Carth began. "I'm afraid that he's right. We've got to get a move on before the Republic shows up and decides to attack without us or the knowledge that Bastila is with the Sith now."

"You know, I just bet that they blame our relationship despite the fact that I was offered the chance to turn and totally didn't," Revan griped.

"Revan, I think I might actually be proud of you," Carth told him as the pair headed to the cockpit.

"Oh? And why is that?" Revan asked, intrigued.

"You had the opportunity to do the easy thing and slip back into your old ways and – for whatever reason, petty or noble – you refused. You really turned your back on Revan for good, didn't you?"

"Not really," Revan disagreed. "I mean, my name is still Revan and everything and being a Sith was not actually my entire life back before Malak tried to kidnap me and the Jedi tried to mind-rape me."

"Well…" Carth trailed off before quickly rallying. "You still chose the right path instead of the easy one for once and that shows a lot of character development on your part. I just feel like we can finally trust you now."

"If that really makes you feel safe at night then by all means, believe what you will," Revan said magnanimously.

Strangely, that did not make Carth feel particularly safe.

"Revan, I see you've successfully led us to the source of the Siths' seemingly-unlimited resources," Vandar observed once the Ebon Hawk had been connected to the Republic leadership at the scene.

The woman next to him glared down at him. "From what I've heard of Revan, I'm sure that Carth did most of the work. People who don't happen to be Force-sensitive can still get things done and are valued members of this Republic, you know."

"Yes, yes, Admiral Dodonna," Vandar said placatingly. "Where is Bastila? I don't see her in the cockpit and if she were on the ship, it would only make sense for her to be here now."

"Oh, she got captured by Malak weeks ago after he finally forced me to admit that I don't have amnesia and now she's evil and using her battle meditation to crush the Republic fleet," Revan explained.

Vandar looked stricken. "This is indeed troubling news."

Dodonna smacked herself in the forehead. "Not another one! What kind of shoddy morality are you teaching over at that Academy?"

"Don't worry," Revan assured Vandar so as to save him from having to try to find an answer for that perfectly valid question. "We'll handle her. And Malak. Force knows that we can't count on anyone not Force sensitive to actually accomplish anything."

Dodonna turned her glare on him. "I deeply despise you."

"I often get that reaction from Republic soldiers," Revan said blithely.

"Master Vandar, how is it that you're even still with us?" Carth asked curiously. "The last time I had checked, you were on Dantooine and we heard that Malak really did a number on the planet."

"He did," Vandar confirmed. "But it seems like the Force had other plans for me and so I survived. And I am not the only one, either. Master Vrook, for instance, is also just fine."

"Yes!" Revan shouted jubilantly, punching the air.

Everyone turned to stare at him, unsure of what to make of this uncharacteristically enthusiastic action.

"What?" Revan asked defensively. "He's awesome!"

"I really don't see the appeal," Carth confessed.

"Neither do I," Dodonna concurred. "Maybe it's a Jedi thing?"

"So what's the plan, anyway?" Revan asked absently.

"We will attempt to engage the Sith fleet and lose horribly due to the Battle Meditation-" Dodonna began.

"Oh, sure, blame it all on the Battle Meditation," Revan muttered under his breath.

"You and a few strike teams of Jedi will sneak into the station, hope that everyone's distracted by the battle, and do whatever it takes to break Bastila's concentration. If you'd like to kill Malak as well, be my guest. Either way, you only have so long before the battle is won and we blow up the Star Forge whether you are on it or not so don't take too long," Dodonna advised.

"Sounds like a plan," Revan said reluctantly. "After that's over, we're done, though, right?"

Vandar gave a long-suffering sigh. "Yes, Revan. After that is over, the galaxy will be saved and there won't be as much for you to have to do."

"I'm not quite sure I'm satisfied with that answer-" Revan started to say before the transmission was suddenly cut off. "He hung up on me! I can't believe he actually hung up on me! That is so not the way of the Jedi!"

"The transmission was probably just faulty," Carth suggested.

Revan didn't even deign to respond to that. "They better not try to use me for their PR because if they do then by the Force I'll…"

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