Next chapter! I'll worn you though, I haven't editted it at all (I rarely do, I'm lazy :P). I'll read this over later and maybe make some grammar and spelling changes if it's really bad, but I'm in a hurry to update! Speaking of updates, I'll try to update again tomorrow, but it might not be until the day after.

Enjoy!

Roy hit the ground hard. This match really wasn't going well. At all. His hair alone would take three washes to get clean. He didn't know if he had that much conditioner.

Or, rather, if Zelda had that much conditioner. Roy found women's conditioner far more effective than men's, it gave his hair that silky, velvety texture... not that it didn't naturally feel that way. It did. The natural feeling just tended to... need revitalizing now and again.

Zelda still thought it was Link stealing her conditioner. Roy never told her otherwise. Neither, for that matter, did Marth. Roy wasn't exactly sure why (it's not like he and Marth were that close... not counting blood ties) but he did have a hunch it had to do with the few drops that always seemed to be missing from the conditioner after Marth showered.

And so life went on.

As did the match which, yet again, Roy had been zoning out on.

He wasn't when an energy beam hit him full force in the stomach, nearly sending him off the edge of Temple.

Roy was glad the recreation picked for this match had been of a large area. Otherwise he wouldn't have had nearly as many chances to run away.

Glancing behind him, Roy grinned and leapt of the edge, angling his fall so that he landed on the tiny, circular platform under the cliff.

Stopping a moment to catch his breath, Roy lost it in a gasp when he glanced up to find Samus on the cliff above, about to blast him. There would be no running now.

It was at that exact moment that a bomb appeared right above Samus's head.

Although Samus's health was still at zero, the angle was so much that once the smasher had been exploded she hit the ceiling above and ricocheted off, falling at an incredible velocity through the space between the cliff and platform.

"Player Two wins!" the announcer proclaimed.

Roy just stared at the space where Samus had fallen, stunned. Then he smirked and straightened his back.

Was he lucky or what?

-(Space)-

"I can't believe you beat Samus." Zelda said, shaking her head, "You do know she made it right up to the finals last year, and she and Mario's match lasted over five hours?"

"A bomb beat Samus." Marth pointed out, "A conveniently placed one at that."

"You're just jealous." Roy scoffed, "Who did you beat? Ness?"

And all of a sudden Roy was frozen. Not in the figurative sense. Oh no, this freezing was very much literal.

"Say my name like that again," Ness warned, walking by their table and shooting daggers at Roy, "And I'll PK Fire your ass, jerk."

And with that, Ness walked away and Roy was unfrozen, only to become frozen in the other sense of the word.

When Roy had recovered, he licked his lips and looked around at the others, voice shaky, "Y-you know I beat Samus, r-right?"

Marth rolled his eyes. Zelda, about to speak, stopped when a voice piped up beside her, "Move Zelda! I want to sit next to Marth!"

Zelda sent Young Link one glower and the boy was instantly sitting beside Roy. He beamed at Marth, ignoring the Princess across from him to the best of his abilities, "Who did you just fight Marth?"

Before Marth could answer, Young Link turned to Roy and added, "You notice how I didn't ask him if he won or not? It's because I know Marth won. Not 'cause the boards say so, nope, but because I have so much faith in Marth and I know he's the best fighter ever and he'd never ever lose and he's super great! See? That shows my faith in him, right there! Understand?"

Roy nodded, looking amused.

Young Link turned back to Marth, suddenly hurt. "You didn't answer my question." Young Link whimpered, lip trembling, "Are we not best friends anymore Marth?"

"We never were." Marth told him, then before the boy could wail, "But I will tell you who I fought if you want."

Young Link perked up, expectant. But just as Marth opened his mouth to reply, a small yellow object landed on his head and the two were suddenly awash in electric waves.

"I'll kill you!" Pichu shrieked.

"You'll kill both of us!" Marth yelled back, trying in vein to disentangle the pokemon.

"Then I 'll die!" Pichu exclaimed, "It is the way of the pikachu! You shall regret ever citing my wrath!"

Marth was just about to throw her off when the electric waves grew stronger. He gritted his teeth and snarled, "I didn't kill anyone!"

"You killed our honour!" Pichu shouted back.

"That's a thing, not a person."

"How dare you!" Pichu gasped, momentarily taken aback, "I'm a thing! Do you spite things? Do you condemn them? Oh fate! How cruel you turn for me!"

"What the hell are you talking about." Marth snapped, yanking the pokemon off his head and dropping her on the table in front of him, "So I beat your cousin or something. Pikachu wasn't hospitalized."

Pichu scowled at Marth, then turned to Zelda and promptly burst into tears, "Zelda! Zelda! Marth is being a meanie!"

Pichu leapt into Zelda's lap and clung to her, crying against her dress. The princess glared at Marth, "You didn't need to make her cry. How horrible."

Suddenly Link was at the table, shaking his head at Marth, "Not even human."

Marth curled his lip at Link in distaste, "Shouldn't you be in the clinic?"

"Alas, the healers have healed me!" Link exclaimed, "So swift and sure in their healings, that they sent me on my way with a jaunty wave, wishing me luck in finding and winning the heart of my love who, I informed them, was under the spell of a terrible, soulless knight-"

Before Link could say anymore, Marth unsheathed his sword. But Zelda was faster. Several seconds later, Link was on the floor, twitching as the final shocks ran through his body.

A few minutes after that, Link was back in the hospital and everyone was happy.

"Where's Kirby?" Marth commented, realizing all of a sudden the pink blob was nowhere to be found. Pichu frowned darkly at the name.

"I don't know." Zelda said with an uninterested shrug, "Probably whisked off somewhere by Queen Jigglypuff, which is fine by me if it gives me a few hours of freedom. But I should find him before she tries to mate..."

Marth gagged at the thought. Roy had a similar reaction. Young Link looked at them curiously. Pichu smirked, already contemplating what kind of free couples vacation she should offer Queen Jigglypuff for her and the pink stress ball.

"I thought you had to shadow them?" Marth asked now, finally recovered.

Zelda shrugged again, "They were gone when I got out of my match, so I figured there was nothing I could do."

"Who were you fighting?" Roy asked, realizing he didn't know. Not that it mattered. It wasn't as if Zelda could have fought anyone more impressive-

"Mario." Zelda replied, more focussed on scratching Pichu behind the ear. Pichu actually started repeating her own name she was in so much bliss.

"How, um, long did it take?" Roy asked, feigning nonchalance as he tried to inspect under his fingernails- not that he needed too, of course, they were always manicured to perfection.

"Ten minutes." Zelda said mindlessly, then frowning to herself, "I was almost late for my dentist appointment."

While Roy gawked openly at Zelda, Marth muttered, "Finally getting your fangs removed?"

Zelda punched him in the shoulder.

Taking a deep breath, Roy did his best to relax. But deep breaths had never worked for Roy- scoping the are for girls, however, always calmed him.

But this was Smash Stadium. The only girls were Peach and Zelda (both definite nos) unless you counted pokemon. Now there were a lot of ways Roy would swing when required, but that wasn't one of them.

The lack of women didn't mean he should get out of shape, of course. He could still practise the casual eye sweep across the room- a technique which he had mastered.

Performing this technique now, not expecting to find anything, he was stunned when his eyes landed on a new girl walking into the cafeteria.

She had blonde hair in a ponytail and was wearing a skin-tight blue body-suit that (unlike Captain Falcon's) made him gawk in a good way.

"Hey, Zelda." Roy hissed, eyes stuck on the girl, "Who's that?"

Zelda cocked an eyebrow, "You're not seriously asking me that, are you?"

Roy was finely able to look away, solely to give Zelda a questioning look, "Yeah. I've never seen her before."

Zelda snorted, "You just fought her."

Roy blinked at Zelda, then the girl, then back again, "But... no... I just fought Samus."

"Bravo Roy." Zelda drawled, "Your deduction skills are exceptional!"

"What?" Roy said, frowning now, "But Samus... isn't... a girl?"

Zelda just looked at him.

"We did refer to her as a she." Marth pointed out, while Pichu shook her head at the redhead.

"Wait, so that means..." as his brain finally began to process the information, Roy looked back at the girl, only to find their eyes meeting.

She immediately gave him one of the most loathsome glares he'd ever seen, then turned and stormed away.

Roy buried his head in his hands and groaned, "Shit."

One more chapter down! Thanks for reading!