I just want to say thanks to everyone that has read and reviewed this story. For those who write I know that you get a small burst of pride when someone tells you that they are enjoying what you have written. For me that pride leads to me getting motivated to write more. So make sure you review.
Also check out my new story for the Twilight series Dr. Confused. I have just begun but let me know what you think.
Characters are owned by Richelle Mead.
I didn't know what to say or do so I just sat there pretending to be asleep. He was right those were the words that I had longed for to hear him say, but now the only words I wanted from him was telling me I was free to go.
Dimitri exhaled his breath he was so close to me I could feel it on the back of my neck. It was warm like it use to be but the sweet smell it use to remind me of was no longer there. There was something unpleasant about his smell and I had to assume it had something to do with the fact that he killed people to survive.
What was I thinking trying to save him, he would hate me and himself if he had to live with what he has done the past year. Who knows how many lives he has taken how much pain he has caused. A silent tear rolled down my check for the man that was lost, the man that would never return no matter what we did. Dimitri remained silent as I did. When I could no longer fight it my eyes drifted shut into a peaceful dream. I feared that Dimitri would come into my dream but he did not show up the only problem was Adrian or Lissa hadn't shown up either.
I thought about calling for him but then I thought maybe he took Alec's advice and was sleeping or maybe they had a clue where I was and he was coming for me. After a while the dream started to shift and change until I was standing in an open meadow the sun beaming on my face warming me inside and out.
"Adrian" I called looking around holding my breath hoping and praying it would be him.
I felt his arms snake around my body. "I am here Little Dhampir" he said pulling my body into his from the back.
"Do you know where he is keeping me yet" I asked afraid of asking him because I was terrified of what his answer would be.
"Not yet but we have a few leads as to where he may have taken you" he said turning my body until I was facing him.
"We are leaving here tomorrow, he said it won't be by plane but I don't know if he would tell me the truth about that. Gosh I miss you so much" I said bringing my hand up to his cheek letting it rest there.
"We will find you before he takes you anywhere. Lissa told me he believes our baby is his" Adrian stated waiting for me to confirm. I nodded my head without saying anything. Adrian stood there like he was trying to find the right words to say what he wanted to get out.
"This can work to our advantage. If he believes the baby is yours and his then he will do whatever he can to protect you and not harm you. It sounds awful but this is a good thing" he said pulling me into his chest. I had thought the same thing but pretending it was his baby was harder than I thought.
"I love you" I sobbed in his chest letting his warmth consume me knowing it was the opposite of Dimitri's cold soulless body. I listened to his heart beat letting it comfort me knowing he was currently alive and safe.
"As I love you" he said burying his head into my hair. His breathing hitched and I knew that he was crying, tightening my grip on him I pulled him closer trying to let my love for him flow between our bodies.
I wanted to asked about everyone to make sure they all made it back to the academy safely but I didn't know if I could bare hearing someone had died. I knew Lissa, Eddy and Alec were safe but I hadn't seen or heard anything about anyone else. I had so many questions but I couldn't get my voice to work to actually ask them.
"Is he taking care of you? Making sure you have food and water? Do you have a comfortable place to sleep a bathroom to use?" he asked without releasing me. I could here the strain in his voice and knew that he was on the verge of tears again which broke my heart all the more.
"Yes he is making sure I am comfortable and feed. I don't think he would think of hurting me while I am pregnant but I am not going to give him a reason to hurt me" I said taking another breathe trying to memorize his smell.
"That's my girl" he said finally pulling away kissing my forehead, both eyes, the tip of my nose and finally lingering on my lips.
"Don't get use to it in a month I wouldn't hesitate to kick his butt without a second thought" I said when he pulled away from my mouth.
"I know and it makes me love you even more" he said before the small smile on his face changed.
"What is wrong?" I asked quickly starting to freak out.
"Someone is trying to get into the dream and I don't believe it is Lissa" he said turning to look around.
"You have to go if it is Dimitri he will be mad you are here" I said hating that Dimitri might be able to ruin the only time I could see Adrian.
"I love you" he said placing a small kiss on my lips before fading out along with the dream. I sat in darkness wiping my eyes when the dream started to change again. I worried that he would know that Adrian was in my dream already and feared what he would do.
DPV (so totally looking at it from Dimitri's point of view. Make sure you comment and let me know what you think and if you want me to do it more)
"I am sorry I didn't say it on the bridge but I love you Roza. I have never stopped no matter how evil you think I am" I whispered in her ear. With my vision I could see the rise and fall of her chest and how it quickly changed as I said these words to my Roza. I knew she was awake although she made no movement to look at me or speak. My anger flared wanting to pull her into my arms and mark her as mine. To finally change her and allow her to see all that my world could offer her but I couldn't not yet.
I rested my head on the back of the headboard watching as her breathing slowed telling me she had finally slipped into sleep. I watched her face the crease that formed on her forehead even is sleep showing me she was in deep thought. Both hands moved protectively over her stomach.
I recall the night I was able to finally get back into her dreams after months of trying discovering that stomach that she protected even in sleep. Every time I thought I was close to breaking through the barrier to get into her dream I would be shoved out violently. I tried every night and then one night I was able to break through. She stood facing toward the trees. I had brought her to the wooded area that surrounded the cabin that we had used the first time we were together. I held very good memories in that cabin and thought that she would also recall those fond memories that seemed to be burned into my memory.
"Roza" I called to let her know that I was there not wanting to frighten her. Her body jumped forward as soon as I spoke, I hated the fact that she was so scared of me. My voice use to bring her joy, her face would redden when I was around with excitement and anticipation. I loved the way she use to react to my presence now I resented the fact that she thought that I was going to kill her every time I was around.
"I did not mean to scare you" I said attempting to hide my annoyance with her reaction trying a calm voice for once.
"You didn't" she said her voice low and guarded, slowly she turned to look at me. Her face was the same, slightly matured from the last time I had seen her but remaining beautiful all the same. I wanted to wrap my arms around her pulling her to my body. To listen to the beating of her heart and sink my teeth into that beautiful neck of hers. I hadn't been able to find anyone that tasted as wonderful as her since she left me. But I remained where I was.
"You smell exquisite" I said moving my eyes back to her face after observing her body. She was wearing a loose shirt that hung over her jeans, I was disappointed she usually didn't hide her beautiful curves.
I started to move forward wanting to be closer to her. Her body tensed yet she didn't move. She was always a good student, it was why I respected her so much although she made many mistakes when it came to me. She let her feelings get the best of her and she let her guard down. I knew no matter what mistake she made I was stronger than her, the only reason she was able to get away the first time is because I let my love for her get the better part of me which weakened me and would not happen again.
"Have you changed your mind, you seem I don't know different" she spoke her voice louder than before.
"No I have not changed my mind I am who I want to be as I have said before. I just don't like you staying away for so long because I can not control my anger" I said hoping she would understand that I never wanted to go back to what I was. I was tired of risking my life for those that would not shed a tear if I were to die protecting them. Now I could do whatever I wanted. I had money, power, and followers. The only other thing I needed was standing in front of me. Her hip to the side her arms resting across her chest.
"I am not the one changing, something is very different about you" I said looking over her again. It was not just her attitude but her body was calling to me more than it had ever. I was using all of my restraint from grabbing her and taking what was mine.
"I am the same old me" she stated dryly.
"You can not keep staying away for so long, I miss you dearly when you do not come to visit. I would hate to move up my plans because I miss seeing you so much" I said watching her face finally changed from the scowling look she had been giving me to one of interest.
"And what plans would those be?" she asked scanning my face for some clue. I had to chuckle at her question and the look that she was giving me.
"What would be the fun of me telling you that. I want to see your face when it happens" I said finally giving away to my desires and grabbing her arm pulling her forward until she stood directly in front of me. Her skin was silky soft and she smelled so much better the closer she was to me. Keeping a hold of her with one hand the other hand trailed down her arm back up moving to her chest to her stomach.
"What is this" I asked I could feel my anger growing knowing very well what it was just that laid under her oversized shirt but wanting her to confirm my assumption. My grip on her arm tightened I heard a small whimper from the pain I was causing her but at that moment all I could think about was causing her pain.
I seen something coming from the trees looking up to observe what it was caused me to loosen my grip on Rose's arm she pulled away from me quickly toward Adrian.
"Back off Belikov" he said grabbing my Roza's arm pulling her toward him taking a protective stance over her. She said something to him and he replied quickly. I would have been able to hear what they were saying if my anger was not getting in the way. All I could see is red and then Rose was gone. And Adrian stood before me.
Shaking myself from the memory I realized that Adrian was clearly a strong dream walker and my beautiful Roza was currently sleeping quite peacefully. Looking over her face I saw the slight smile on her face and I knew she was with him. I thought about shaking her to wake her but thought maybe I could catch him in the dream and finish what I had started the last time we were in a dream together. I wasn't sure what injury's he would sustain outside of the dream but maybe Rose seeing me hurt him would teach her a lesson to not to anger me.
Closing my eyes I pushed through the weak barrier she had put up. I found her surrounded by darkness alone silent tears rolling down her cheeks. I quickly changed the dream so we were back in the old apartment I had keep her in. Although our time there was bitter sweet we had many good times there. I saw her resistance weaken and her arousal rise when I would drink her blood. I knew if I could of keep her another week she would have finally given in. But that was not the case, so I found myself trying to calm my anger before I spoke to her.
RPV
I could feel his presence behind me but chose not to look back. I figured he knew I had not been alone he is not stupid I was just surprised it took him this long to come. The feeling of loss I was feeling now that my time with Adrian was cut short brought another round of sobs through my chest.
"I do not wish for you to cry" Dimitri finally spoke breaking the silence.
Another sob broke through wishing that I could go back to that day in the cave. I could save him, this would not be happening. My heart was yelling at me what about Adrian but deep down I knew that no matter what happened that Adrian and I would have found each other whether Dimitri was changed or not. I loved Dimitri but what I felt for Adrian was so much more, so much stronger there was no way that I wouldn't have realized that eventually. He was my soul mate.
"Then why do you keep me here against my will?" I finally asked when I thought I could control my voice.
"Because you are mine, you belong with me" he simply stated like it was common sense and he didn't understand how I didn't know that.
His words and his invasion of my dream had lit a fuse. Jumping up the best I could carrying an extra twenty-five pounds I turned to walked to stand in front of him.
"I belong to no one, especially you" I hissed at him.
His hands were around my arms before I could finish what I was saying pulling my feet from the floor to his face. "The sooner you realize that you are mine the better off you will be" he said the venom in his voice making me flinch back. The red in his eyes seemed to be glowing. "You were always so stubborn, once I change you there will be no more of that" he said sitting me down on my feet. I wanted to say something about how he would never get that chance but I quickly realized that he would get over losing this baby fairly quickly to change me now if I continued to challenge him. So biting my tongue I stepped out of his reach cowering toward the ground.
"Do you love Adrian?" his words caught me by surprise so I stood there stunned silent. "I asked you a question, I know I taught you more respect than that Roza" he said.
I wasn't sure what he was looking for and if my honesty would only anger him further but lying seemed pointless because he would see right through it.
"Of course I do" I said not wanting to give any detail of how much I loved him. Because telling him that I love Adrian with all of my heart would probably not go over very well.
"Do you want to see him die?" he asked with so much hate in his voice it felt like my heart stopped hearing those words come out of his mouth.
"Why would you ask me that? I would rather you kill me" I said knowing the truth of my own words.
The look on Dimitri's face made me realize what I had just said and I was regretting it instantly. After a minute he started to speak again the anger evident in his voice.
"Then I suggest you listen and you listen well, you will not see him again. When I say this I mean in person unless I make you watch me kill him if you disobey me. You will push him out of any dream that he may attempt to enter. The next time he attempts to enter your dream I will be there with you and I will watch you tell him that you no longer want him. And you will make it believable or I will go out and personally kill him myself" his hand grabbed my face pulling me closer to him. "Do you understand?" he asked tightening his grip in my face.
"Why are you doing this to me? I thought you loved me. You can't be all evil, there has to be a part of the old Dimitri in there somewhere" I sobbed not from the pain that I was feeling from his hold on me, but from my heart breaking for what was to come. I thought Adrian would be able to save me but the more I looked at Dimitri the more I saw how determined he was. And that determination would only end up getting Adrian killed.
"How many times have I told you because you are mine. You and that baby are going to be my family. Now do you understand?" he hissed pulling my face closer to his until our nose's were all but touching.
"Yes" I said letting the tears flow freely once again. He let go of my face and I quickly backed away from him. My heart was breaking but I knew what I was going to have to do no matter how much it hurt.
Dimitri didn't speak any further he left me to sob on the ground. Until the dream faded I found myself laying on the tiny bed my bladder was screaming at me to be emptied. I sat up the best I could without touching Dimitri which was hard because his body was pushed up against my back. I stumbled to the bathroom when the rope got caught up against the small nightstand. Pulling the rope free I walked into the bathroom pushing the door closed as soon as I was through it.
I took care of my needs and then sank against the door trying to figure out a way that I would be able to make Adrian believe I didn't want him any longer. Just the thought of those words leaving my mouth broke my heart how was I going to look into his beautiful green eyes and tell him that I wanted to be with Dimitri and he needed to stop looking for me. Even then I knew he would not give up if not for me for his baby. I knew I would do the same thing to save him and our child I would walk through hell to save them and keep them safe.
"Roza we will be leaving soon. You may shower now or wait until we get to the new house" Dimitri said through the door pulling me from my thoughts and the agony I was feeling. The thought of being so close to Dimitri and being naked sent a wave of uneasiness through my body. Hoping that the new house would have more privacy and space I chose to wait. Removing myself from the floor I opened the door and walked back into the bedroom.
"I have set food on the table if you are hungry we will leave within the hour once the sun sets" he said walking past me into the bathroom. I was going to ignore the food until my stomach grumbled when the smell hit my nostrils. Sitting on the edge of the bed I grabbed the powdered donut and started to eat. After finishing three donuts Dimitri emerged from the bathroom his hair was wet, realizing I was so wrapped up in my thoughts I didn't even here the water running.
"You will be blindfolded while we travel, it will take a few hours. I am not going to restrain you but if you try and escape you will regret it" he said walking to the dresser to pick up a piece of black fabric.
"Do you need anything before we go?" he asked standing in front of me.
"No" was all I could muster out. Happy with my answer he wrapped the fabric around my eyes leaning forward to tie a knot in the back. I was surprised the fabric was silk but what surprised me the most is it had his smell. Not how he smelled now but what my Dimitri use to smell like.
"Lets go" he said grabbing my arm and pulling me from the bed. It did not take us long to get to the car, sitting me down in the passenger seat Dimitri reached over pulling the seatbelt over my lap tucking the lap belt under my stomach. I flinched when he touched my stomach and could here him chuckle at my movement. Dimitri laughing was a rarity before he was changed and it surprised me that when he laughed now it almost matched his old laugh exactly. I longed for that man to return and tell me this had all been a nightmare and that Adrian was waiting for me, but this nightmare was my reality.
The first hour of the drive was silent besides the awful music that filled the car no matter what Dimitri was his taste in music still sucked. The baby was especially rowdy kicking me nonstop. We had to stop two times within the first hour so I could use the bathroom.
"Roza this is getting ridiculous" he said as he pulled into a rest stop or what I was assuming was a rest stop.
"I can't help it the baby keeps kicking my bladder. Trust me I am not any happier about it than you are" I said dryly.
Dimitri walked me into the stall before removing the blind fold. I was able to pee but as soon as I opened the stall door the blindfold went back on. I was just hoping that nobody else was in the bathroom. I wasn't sure when the last time Dimitri feed and I didn't want to think of him feeding on some poor family that was heading into the mountains to go camping for dinner. Thankfully we hand not encountered anyone so far. The thought brought me comfort until I realized that maybe we were not encountering anyone because we were heading into isolation. Maybe this would be better Adrian would be safe.
After another hour I was ready to throw myself out of the car if I had to listen to anymore of his awful music. Reaching my blind hand forward I reached the volume knob turning it until the music faded out completely.
"What are you doing Roza?" he asked for once his voice was not filled with anger but curiosity.
"I wanted to talk" I said recalling the time we laid in bed together at the apartment and how he seemed to soften when we spoke about his family. I figured maybe it would work again.
"Have you seen your family since you were changed?" I asked hoping he would not be angered by my question.
"Yes, from afar. I do not trust myself to not harm them" he said a hint of sadness in his voice.
"They miss you" I said hoping to hit something within him that would register and bring the old Dimitri back.
"I know" was all he said.
"How long did you stay in Russia?"
"A while after Galina and Nathan's death I inherited a lot of power and money. It took a while to get things settled and for the others to accept me as their leader" he said amusement in his voice.
"Will we go back?" I whispered praying that his answer would be no.
"Maybe" was all he said before changing the subject to something I was hoping we could avoid talking about. My baby.
"How much longer until you deliver the child" he asked. I hated that he was asking about the baby. But I hated the way he asked more. When Adrian would ask his voice was always full of love and excitement, Dimitri asking was void of any feelings just the need for knowledge.
"In a month" I said thinking it would be better not to lie. I felt his hand on my stomach, immediately the baby started kicking. "I am sure it will be beautiful if it looks anything like it's mother" he said chuckling when the baby kicked his hand with quite a bit of force.
I wanted to pull his arm from his body to ensure he would never touch me or the baby again but instead I sat there silently as his hand roamed up and down my stomach.
I yawned realizing that I hadn't had a lot of sleep closing my eyes I started to drift into sleep. Until I felt Dimitri shake my body.
"You will not sleep until we reach our destination" he said shaking my arm again until I responded.
"I am tired" I said knowing that having a black silk cloth wrapped around my eyes was not helping.
"I do not care, I don't trust you at this point therefore you will wait. Although you should prepare what you plan on telling Adrian the next time you see him" this time when he laughed it was a cold, malice laugh.
Remember to hit the green button and review. And check out my new Twilight story Dr. Confused and let me know what you think.