hey guys C8 miss me?

I've had a lot of things going on, so I still hope you remember this series! xD minor warning for swearing. courtesy of dear Gilbert.

This is basically the realization part of this entire fanfic. It's actually meant to be 10 chapters or so, but we'll see. This chapter is kinda short so I sincerely apologize ^ ^;;

AND THANK YOU GUYS FOR THE STORY ALERTS, FAVORITES, AND REVIEWS! You guys make my day 8'D

without further ado, let the chapter start!

"Oh my fucking god," Gilbert said, rubbing his stomach. "Maybe we won't die, but oh my god, I am so damn hungry right now."

"Don't complain," Roderich deadpanned even though he himself was starving. It was only their second day, and they had absolutely no food. They were so hungry; they resorted to lying down in their tent and not do anything. Perhaps there were wild mushrooms out somewhere, but that might get them a stomachache instead.

"Roddy…" the albino moaned, flipping over. "Can't you get something to eat…or something? I'll even take those fucking mushrooms if it means feeding my damn stomach."

"You're not the only one hungry." He retorted. "Can't you very well get up and search for food? You were the almighty Prussian empire and all."

Gilbert rolled his eyes in return. "As much as I'd take that compliment, I think you're more capable for looking for something edible. You never take anything less than perfect, right?"

Roderich huffed. This was getting quite annoying. "Suppose I will." He said, getting up, dusted his coat and stepped out the tent. He practically felt the superior smirk stab him in the back. "When I come back, you'll have to thank me when I saved you from your hunger." He added irritably, before walking out. He flinched when he heard a snicker from the man in return."

"Take care, Roddykins~!" Gilbert called out, sounding completely amused.

"That troublesome fool," Roderich continued to mutter under his breath. "Dumme, Trottel, Schwachsinnige, why doesn't he do something himself for a change?" And yet, here he was, doing what the Prussian told him to. He didn't need to do it; he well knew that the Prussian would get off his high horse someday to get food, and yet, here he was.

I don't even know what to think anymore, He sighs inwardly, as he appraises a wild plant. Yes, it was Tarragon. He's a stupid blockhead and I still comply with what he says. He looked around for something else. Ah, a river. I do all the work, and I don't get anything in return but names and more orders. He tried to catch one of the many swimming trout, but he wasn't concentrated enough. But why would I even go through all this? It's not worth it.

…Right?

The fish he caught slipped through his fingers as he realized in horror what he was thinking.

Do I love him? There's absolutely no way that could be!

He blindly tried to catch another fish, but it was in vain. He stared at the spot he dropped the fish in a while ago. The ripples were long gone, and the fish was too.

What if he was like this too?

What if he slips through my fingers, and never comes back?

His chest felt heavy. He inhaled, and exhaled, but he still felt some sort of weight in his chest. They were rivals for quite some time, but they still stuck together. Throughout the day, Gilbert would go to his house to pester him, and he would shake him off. Every day was a day of harassment, but it was still a part of Roderich's day. If Gilbert didn't go to his house, he wouldn't do anything. He once thought it would've been a nice change, without Gilbert around.

What if he stopped coming to my house?

Would it be quiet?

Of course it would.

Would he enjoy the peacefulness?

Perhaps not completely, now that he thought about it. The house always seemed empty since Elizaveta left.

Did I actually enjoy his visits to my house?

…Roderich bit his lower lip. He blindingly went around, searching for something else to eat. His initial response would've been no, but if he thought about it a bit more, he realized that he did enjoy it, in a way.

But did it ever occur to him that he had feelings for the man? No, he didn't think about it at all. Until recently, when…

He shook his head. Now wasn't the time to over think things. He had to find some way to feed the two of them, or else they'd be too hungry to even speak. He bit his lower lip, and looked around.

He blinked.

All he saw were trees around him.

He didn't know where he was.

"…Shit."

"Oh god where the fuck is that Roderich?" Gilbert groaned in frustration. He turned over so he was lying on his stomach. "He is such a piss off, I swear." He was waiting for over an hour or so already, and Gilbert's stomach wasn't getting any quieter.

"That dummkopf is such an annoying bitch," he grumbled to himself. "He should be thankful that the awesome me let him get food for both of us. If I'd cook it, it would taste awesome, but he wouldn't handle its awesomeness at all."

He always denies everything I do or make. He thought, somewhat melancholic. They've been fighting for the longest time, and he always won. He was always the awesome one.

He wanted Roderich to acknowledge the fact that he was.

But Roderich would always deny it. Whether it was a simple dish or a war, he would never acknowledge him.

Why though? A voice inside his (awesome) head asked him. Why would you do so much just to make him acknowledge you?

Because he was! Everyone thought so.

Not everyone.

Well, his Bruder thought he was at least.

You know that isn't true. You know that Bruder thought you were only powerful before.

…Okay, he had no response to that thought.

So why would he go through those extremities just to make Roderich see?

…was it love?

"PFFF," he cackled, "I don't need this love! I'm perfectly happy alone! Nobody will drag you down!" He kept silent after a while, and pondered. Did he have feelings for him?

Of course not.

The kiss from back then was just to tease him.

…right?

He cursed himself inwardly, as he stood up. All this waiting made his head hurt. Where the fuck was that Roderich? That man always took so long, since he easily got lost—

"Oh my god," he realized in pure frustration, "He gets lost easily. Verdammt I knew I shouldn't have let him go alone." With that, he stormed out the tent and searched for him.

"Roddy!" He called out, as he walked around the vast woods around him. "Where are you, Rod?"

"Seriously," he growled, "Why does he even get lost? This is a fucking park!" And yet, Roderich wasn't seen at all. Gilbert pushed that nervous feeling aside, and walked around. He felt like there was something wrong, but he didn't quite know why. Perhaps it was his battle instincts, but he felt like he should be running, and not stay calm about it.

Where is he…? He thought with increasing anxiety, and then he stopped.

He saw Roderich on the ground.

I'm not gonna lie when I say that updates will be slow. :c so just cross your fingers I'm not lazy!