Sorry it took so long. Another FF submission problem.

Anyway, this is short, but it's full of important questions and it will get your own mind reeling. Enjoy!

Of course, I do not own kingdom hearts, and having to put this at the bottom of each intro memo thing gets rather irritating after eighteen chapters or whatever.

PLUM WINGS & A MIDNIGHT DIRGE - REGRET

He was gone, now, and I had made him leave. I was not prepared for him to come to my aid. And now that he had...

"Why do all misfortunes seem to fall on the two of us?" I put my face in my hands, thinking. But, I didnt know what I was thinking. Blank thoughts? There was nothing going through my head, only emotion, no solid thoughts.

Demyx had gone away, and I was left alone once again. He had brought me things to survive off of, he had risked his life for my sake, he must have wanted me alive. But I had spent so long in seclusion that I had no idea why he would want such a thing. Sighing, I made myself look through the bag he left behind. Inside was rope, bread, two apples, several water bottles and clothes. Of course, the blanket he had brought was also with me.

For the remainder of the day, I stayed inside the shelter. But when I mustered up enough mind to go outside, I looked up. There was a hole through the snow, and even through the twigs and branches, just like Demyx had said. At least he wasnt lying. It was brighter, even though the sun seemed to be setting. I looked around, trying to see any other signs that he was there. But there were none.

There was a decent amount of sunlight coming through, and me, having not seen sunlight in...weeks, months, I sat right under it. It was so warm...I had forgotten how warm the sun was. I had probably forgotten about most of the sensations I had taken for granted for every single day of my life, until, of course, the revine happened. I wondered whether or not I would get out of there, at that time. And if I did get out, how would I be in life again? Simple things like sunlight to me would be like sight to those who had never seen before. Warmth, a house, clean clothes, food when ready, water when ready...I wanted them back, yes, but I couldnt help but think about it all.

If I got out, would I be amazed at everything so familiar but lost to me? And if that happened, would I just go back to taking everything for granted, or would I hold wisdom in that eye?

If I got out, what would be said about me, and to me? Would I be careful about the people I chose to befriend, knowing that they may one day be gone from me forever?

What would happen to me?

Everything I thought about was almost frightening. There were so many more questions, now, ever since Demyx had come. I didnt know why he wanted me alive...the more and more I thought about, the more and more I was bewildered about it.

I laughed, trying to understand.

"Why did you send him away?" I was speaking to myself, questioning myself mindlessly. "He came to rescue you, to keep you alive. And you sent him away. Why?"

"I was unprepared for him to come to me, I had no idea he was going to come back for me,"

"So you sent him away for saving your life?"

A pause.

"I was unprepared."

"Unprepared?"

"Yes..." I paused, shifting my position a bit. "Unprepared."

"Unprepared for what?" I took a breath, and paused in answering.

"To..." Another pause. "...live,"

"I see," I changed my position again, shifting back and forth, mindlessly, heartlessly. "You were unprepared to live."

"Yes...prepared to die, unprepared to live," I came back from my mindless state, half wondering what I had just said, but half knowledgable about it at the same time. I knew what the problem was, of course I did. It was a problem I had created, and I had no need to create it. So, then the same question came back to me.

Why did you- I, send him away?

It was another day before I made any sort of move towards the things Demyx had left. I used the blanket as both a sheet and a blanket, folding myself in it at nights in subsitution for a sleeping bag. That was all. The water stayed where it was, as did the rest of the food and supplies. But I started to grow tempted, it was there and it was brought for me. Something in me, that was not greed, gluttony, nor hunger, told me I should take it, that I would need it. Not for my body, nor my health. It was something else. I had learned to listen to that voice, in the revine, and did as it said, if the power behind it was strong enough.

The water was not used for drinking, instead, I used it to wash myself. One bottle I used on my arms alone, another I used on my chest, and a third I dumped over my head and washed my hair and face with it. Whatever water ran off cleaned as much of my legs as it could, but I didnt worry about it. I felt so clean, even though I had hardly washed at all. I changed into the new clothes he left me, and then used another water bottle to ring out the dirt and grime from my shirt and pants, laying them both down, one on top of the other, then pouring a quarter of the water on the shirt, balling it up, and then squeezing the browned water onto the pants so I could then do the same to the pants, and continued until no water could be rung from them. I used the whole water bottle on the clothes, and got them fairly clean. I used the rope he left as a clothes line, tying it across a long length, from one end of the clearing to the other, right in front of my shelter. It reached fine, and when it was sturdy enough, I laid the wet clothes out on it, folding them over in half. The next day, I flipped the clothes over and made sure both sides were dry.

"Zexion, you have to get out of here." My mindless state came back as I stared at the clothes, feeling them.

"I can't get out myself."

"Why not?"

"Because...I have my broken arm. I can hardly lift it without pain-"

"That's what you think," I cut myself off, and I narrowed my eyes, dropping my hand from feeling the clothes.

"Then what do you suggest?"

"Climb the cliff, just like he did."

"He didnt have a broken arm, I do. Hence, why I did not go with him the first time, and stayed here,"

"But now he's gone, thanks to you."

"I fail to see what you are trying to tell me," I sat down, closing my eyes.

"He won't be coming back because you sent him away like that. He thinks you dont want to see him ever again." I stopped, almost coming back to myself, to my real mind. But then I floated back to mindlessness.

"But, I want to see him again,"

"Then climb the cliff side." I straightened my back, taking a breath as I did so. I stood up, conscious again. I walked to the tree he climbed up only a little while before, thinking about it. I sighed.

"I would have to get used to the pain," But then I laughed. "Although, I should be damn well used to it all, by now."