September 15, 2011

Hello, friends,

Hopefully the Twilight community is aware of the wonderful Breaking Dawn trailer that aired this week. I'm very excited for the upcoming movie, and my enthusiasm greatly lends to my desire to write. You should see another revamp in the next week.

If any of you are praying people, please consider my college community in your hearts. We lost a student to choking last weekend, a member of my class that I knew fairly well, and our campus is grieving him.

With admiration and gratitude,

evelyn-shaye

Special thanks to my betas of chapter, PurplePrincess77 and lost in his golden eyes. Both of them were fantastic! I must also make a plug for tookkia, who stuck with me throughout this entire story and has an amazing story of her own called The Moon Is Mine. You're the best!

Chapter Two: Girls' Night

The trip to Billy's wasn't the most pleasant, but neither was it as bad as it could've been. When we came through the door, Jacob his usual shirtless self and me in a yellow cotton dress, Billy was waiting for us.

"Knew those bloodsuckers would take you away from me eventually," he muttered, pulling Jacob into a fierce man-hug. "I'll miss you, but I know you gotta go."

If Jake had been in his wolf form, I knew he would've whined and butted his head against Billy's shoulder. Instead, he patted his dad on the back, only his eyes betraying sadness.

"It's not goodbye forever," he promised. "We'll definitely visit during the holidays and come back more permanently once Nessie makes it through high school the first time." He squeezed my hand reassuringly at the disgruntled expression on my face.

Billy shifted his attention to me. "Nessie," he said softly, his eyes crinkling. I stepped forward and settled gently onto his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He smiled. "You grow more beautiful every time I see you," he murmured, gazing curiously into my eyes. This was a common practice for us. Billy told me on my tenth physical birthday that the depth of one's soul lived in their eyes, and that my eyes in particular spun a marvelous story, filled with a bright and hopeful future. He searched my eyes frequently, whether for an answer to one question or simply to wander, he never said.

He sighed, jostling me with a playful grin. "You're getting a bit heavy for this old man," he teased, his face lighting up as Jacob's always did. I beamed back at him.

As I rejoined Jacob and intertwined my fingers with his, Billy eyed Jacob seriously. "You take care of her," he ordered, his voice hinting at the Alpha power he never fully possessed. "And you," he said lightly, turning to me with a still-serious expression that didn't match his tone. "Take care of my son."

Jacob's fingers twitched infinitesimally, and I nodded solemnly and squeezed his hand tighter.

He didn't bother to phase on the trip to Emily's house, preferring to walk slowly, our hands swinging between us. I glanced up at him expectantly, waiting for his usual light smile that graced his features whenever we walked along the coastline, but Jake stared straight ahead, deep in thought. As a distraction, I asked him nonverbally if we could play in the water first, but he shook his head. "I need to do this while I still have the nerve," he explained. I sent him a vision of ripping off a Band-Aid, and he chuckled.

When we arrived, Claire opened the door. "Nessie!" she squealed, wrapping her little arms around my waist.

"Hiya, Claire-bear," I greeted, pulling lightly on her pigtails. She shook her hair and giggled.

"Hey now," a deep but young voice interrupted, mocking hurt. "I'm the only one allowed to call her Claire-bear."

I glanced up to see Quil descending the stairs. Claire ran over to him, and he scooped her onto his back, with an elaborate duck and spin for effect. She laughed with delight.

I shook my head at them. Silly imprints.

"I hope you're on your way out, Quil," I told him. "I was planning to do Claire's nails today; she's been begging me for a week." I winked at her.

Claire smiled widely at me but then pouted. "Do you have to leave, Quil?" she asked sadly. I sympathized with her pain; I felt the same way whenever Jake left me, and I could imagine that being an imprint made the separation even harder.

Quil lowered her gently and laid a hand on her cheek. "Sorry, girl," he answered, "but I do have to run. I've got patrol with Seth and Embry in a few. You stickin' around, Jake?" he asked, shifting his attention to his Alpha.

Jacob shook his head. "Not this time, man. I gotta meet with Old Quil and the others." The words stuck in his throat, and he coughed and averted his gaze.

Quil frowned. He knew from Jake's tone that something was up and turned to me questioningly. Jake had told me earlier that he wanted to settle things with the elders before informing the pack, so I raised my fingers to my lips and tried to be cute and mime that my lips were sealed. I wasn't very convincing. The surreal feeling from this morning was starting to sink in, and I realized with a sudden rush of emotion just how hard it would be to leave the pack behind. All my brothers…

"Well, whatever," Quil said, trying to change the subject. "Let's meet up sometime later if you're still around the rez."

"I'll be here," Jake assured him. "Ness is staying at La Push for a little bit."

Quil looked confused, knowing how overprotective Daddy could be, but nodded. "I'll let Sam know you're here."

"Thanks, bro."

Quil gave Claire one more big hug before he bounded out the door. I glanced out the window a few seconds later; he had already phased and disappeared into the woods.

Jacob placed a warm hand on my shoulder. "I'll catch up with you later, okay?"

I turned to him and smiled. "Come back soon." Jake smiled and leaned down to kiss my forehead. When he left, I touched the spot where he kissed me; it was tingling. It felt warm and more than nice.

But it was Jake. My Jake. My best friend since the day I was born. It certainly wasn't the first time he had kissed me. But when had I felt anything more than security and overall happiness? This was a different sensation entirely.

I decided to chalk it up to the whirlwind of emotions due to the move and think about it later, because Claire soon recaptured my attention.

"Emily bought me Tinker Bell nail polish!" she enthused, her smile wide and impossible to resist. "And Mommy let me bring Peter Pan with me!"

I smiled easily, my attention happily diverted, and popped her favorite DVD into the player. As the credits began, I grabbed a towel from under the bathroom sink and settled on the couch with her. She bounced up and down with excitement; I laughed and reminded her that I couldn't paint her nails unless she sat still. At that, she sat up straight and presented her hand imperiously to me. I grinned at her cheekiness and began painting slow, perfect strokes of glitter green on each smooth, pink fingernail.

As she sat quietly, enthralled by the movie, I took the time to study her face. It was the perfect face of a little girl, round and cherub-like. Her dark cheeks had a tint of healthy pink; her brown eyes sparkled with the joy of every small child. Indian ribbons were tied at the ends of her loose braids.

I had to wonder: if Quil hadn't imprinted on her, would he have fallen for her one day anyway? Watching her face now, I was glad that she was destined to be his Claire. Only he would take care of her the way she deserved.

Now my thoughts wandered back to Jake, and my feeling of contentedness subsided somewhat. He never talked with me about imprinting, except to talk about his friends: Quil, Jared, Paul, Leah, even Embry, who had imprinted a month ago on a girl from the Makah reservation, his old home. He never said a word about himself, if he had ever imprinted, if he ever hoped to. Whenever I asked, he would just smile and say, "I have you, Nessie. That's more than enough."

Jacob would tell me if he imprinted on me, right?

I did wonder sometimes. All the signs were there, starting with the moment we met. That intensity in his eyes, that adoration—but didn't everyone look at me like that? Momma and my aunts loved to touch my curls and caress my face; Daddy and my uncles told me frequently that I was a marvel, and the expressions on their faces always confirmed it. Jake's affinity to me was no different than theirs.

Except that…it was. My parents had no qualms about letting me leave the glass house. They would miss me and be concerned about me, to be sure, but it didn't hurt them to be apart from me. Not the way it seemed to kill Jake.

He'd explained it to me once.

I was about three years old, and we were sitting on the riverbank behind the glass house. Our feet dipped in the water, I laid my hand on his and let my thoughts wander to all the amazing times we'd spent together during my accelerated childhood. He chuckled at some memories, merely smiled at others, his eyes bright and dancing at the fondness behind my thoughts.

Then my thoughts slipped to something I had never planned to address. I wanted to know why he was never away from me for more than a few hours. Jake's face fell, crushed, and trying to conceal the hurt in his voice, he asked quietly if I wanted him to leave. My heart raced with guilt and worry, and I hurriedly reassured him that I loved having him around and would always crave his company. I just didn't understand his desperate need to be nearby.

Jacob seemed appeased but thoughtful. Whether he wasn't sure how to answer or was trying to come up with a half-truth, I couldn't tell. Finally, he settled for an answer that was mostly satisfactory.

"You've been my best friend since the day you were born," he said slowly. I smiled in encouragement. "I was already very present in your life, but after the Volturi almost destroyed you and your family…" He and I winced at the memory, and I climbed into his lap, seeking solace. He wrapped his arms around me and gazed gently but seriously into my eyes.

"I realized that your life was the most important thing to me, and now I'm filled with a constant care and concern for your well-being." Jacob paused and grinned at me, splashing me lightly with water. "As long as I'm with you, nothing bad can happen, right?"

I smiled at my memory of that conversation. My life was the most important thing to Jacob Black.

But what did that mean? Was I his imprint or not?

I pondered this question a little longer, not really paying attention to the movie, but no answer came to me. About half an hour later, Emily came home.

"Oh good, Nessie, you're here," she greeted me. Her arms were full of paper grocery bags. "I wasn't sure if Sam needed Quil tonight, and I hate leaving Claire by herself."

Abandoning her movie, Claire jumped off of the couch and wrapped her tiny arms around her aunt's thighs. "Hey, Aunt Emily!" she exclaimed.

Emily smiled. "Let me put down these groceries so I can give you a real hug," she told her niece, her voice content. Claire giggled and held on to Emily's right knee as they sashayed toward the kitchen. I smiled at the depth of love and rapport between them.

I followed the two of them to the kitchen and reached for the closest bag of groceries.

"Thanks, Ness," Emily said earnestly. She leaned against the counter and hugged Claire against her leg. "I didn't know you were coming over today."

"Neither did I," I admitted. "I thought Jake had said something?"

Emily shook her head. "Not to me. I'm happy you're here, though. There's so much testosterone on this rez." She wrinkled her nose, but her eyes twinkled.

I laughed. As much as Emily claimed to be tired of the wolf pack that constantly cleaned out her refrigerator, she loved them like her own sons. It didn't hurt that she was Sam's imprint, either.

"I understand completely," I told her. "We girls gotta stick together, right?" I opened my arms for a hug.

Emily smiled easily and wrapped me in a warm embrace. "Absolutely," she agreed. "Now, what would my favorite girls like for dinner?"

It was one of our better girls' nights. Claire stirred some corkscrew pasta in boiling water while Emily cooked chicken in an alfredo sauce. I offered to make raspberry muffins, and Emily enthusiastically found some mix in the pantry and a basket to pick berries from her garden. The pack was gonna be so jealous that we had such great grub without them. Emily and I conspiratorially agreed to keep the secret between us, exchanging familiar sly smiles at the thought of our La Push guys.

Claire and I played Pretty Pretty Princess awhile after dinner, taking a short break to greet Sam when he returned home, but both of our heads began to nod around ten. Emily carried Claire upstairs to the guest room that was basically Claire's second bedroom. I collapsed on the couch and was asleep almost immediately. As I drifted off, I vaguely remembered Jacob's joking that I could lie down on marble and still sleep comfortably. The thought made me smile.