September 18, 2011

At this time, I would like to personally thank lost in his golden eyes, who has beta-ed my last two chapters. She gave me wonderful feedback that I was thrilled to incorporate into this edit, as well as an encouraging comment that made my heart soar. Thank you for your dedication thus far!

I've recently been inspired with my sequel, so avid readers may see a new chapter soon.

With happiness and hope,

evelyn-shaye

Special thanks to my betas for this chapter, lost in his golden eyes and babykay16 (Akila). I enjoyed your criticisms and comments immensely!

Chapter Three: Choice

I stayed at Emily's quaint home for three days, all of which were spent entertaining Claire, putting up with Quil's antics, and offering Emily unnecessary help around the house. Jacob visited me every morning around breakfast and every afternoon around three, sometimes bringing Embry and Seth with him. I begged him to stay longer, but though he apologized, all he could tell me was that he was still making arrangements with the Elders.

I didn't pester him for information. I knew by the pained expression on his face that this was hard on him, too, so I reminded myself that we'd be together every day once we got to North Dakota and contented myself by spending time with my brothers.

Grandfather had already purchased a house just outside of Westhope. Grandmother was there renovating in her usual style, and the rest of the family were using nights to drive most of the cars and their most memorable possessions – Grandfather's cross, Daddy's piano, and Uncle Jasper's Civil War uniform, among other valuables – to the new place. Alice offered to help Grandmother with the renovations, but she waved her daughter off, sending her with Rosalie to buy furniture and appliances. Grandmother loved a good interior design project.

Back in La Push, Claire didn't fully grasp that I was leaving. In her little mind, I would be gone for a few days and then come to visit. Emily, however, was visibly upset.

"Of course it's wonderful that you get to live where you'll be less conspicuous," she assured me. Sam had told her early on exactly what I was, and she had long since reconciled herself to my nature and accepted me as a normal girl. "But Claire needs you, and the pack needs Jake."

"Not necessarily, anymore," I said grimly. "If our coven leaves, what will the wolves be called on to protect the tribe from?" Emily looked satisfied at that, though her eyes weren't completely dry. I didn't bother to tell her that we'd be back in four years. There was no need to concern her with the future.

When Jake came to get me on the fourth day, I was ready. I had said all my goodbyes and let myself be crushed by a bunch of teenage werewolf hugs. There was nothing more to say.

Jacob was quiet as we walked home at a quasi-normal pace (still faster than any human). I chanced a look at his face; his eyes pooled with unshed tears, one escaping to run down his cheek.

I felt pain for my best friend and guilt in my heart. He was leaving everything behind for me. It didn't seem fair, at all.

While my mother's nature urged me to apologize and beg him to forgive me for tearing him away from his family, I knew that Jake needed normality today. I fought against the guilt that he would never understand and squeezed his hand, instead. "We'll be back," I promised him. I forced my voice to sound strong.

Jacob coughed and wiped the tear away. "Sure, sure," he answered automatically. With another cough, he diverted his gaze to the trees, hiding his face.

I pulled him to a stop, placing a small hand on his grown-up face. He still wouldn't meet my eyes, so I raised my other palm to his cheek, pressing against him until he faced me reluctantly. Bravely, wincing inwardly, I broke one of our core values as friends: I lied.

"I'll understand…if you need to stay here," I said seriously. "You don't have to come with us. I'll survive." My voice began to wobble, so I stopped.

Jake stared at me in shock. "No, no!" he gasped. He wrapped his arms around me, burying his face in my hair. "I know who I can't live without, Ness. You're my best friend; I can't leave you."

I leaned into him, savoring the warmth emanating from his body and the possessive way he held me. Whatever doubts I'd harbored now drifted away. Jake is mine. He wants to be with me. He would leave his pack—

I was struck with a sort of epiphany that halted my train of thought: Jacob was willing to leave his pack. I didn't know of any other werewolf that could forego his obligation to La Push in favor of an outsider. Back when I still resided in Bella's womb, and Jacob had started his own pack, Quil had wanted to join Jacob but couldn't. Claire still lived in La Push; Quil couldn't physically leave his imprint, even to take orders from his best friend, the leader he wanted to follow.

So there were only two possibilities. One, Jacob hadn't imprinted. There was no one significant in La Push holding him back. But still, the loyalty of a pack against one half-vampire friend?

That left the second option: Jacob had imprinted, and he had to follow his imprint wherever she went. In this case, he meant to follow me to North Dakota.

I mentally slapped myself. Of course I'm not Jacob's imprint! I thought, even though it had crossed my mind just days ago at Emily's house. Jacob would've told me!

Or would he? a new voice asked. What if he was hiding this from me so I could make my own choice about our relationship?

I was struck with a bout of fear. I'm not ready to make this choice! I was only just feeling the first waves of adolescent curiosity. Even if I were Jake's imprint, I couldn't see myself kissing him, like Emily kissed Sam.

I flushed. This was ridiculous. I didn't even know if my theory was true. Maybe Jacob really loved me as a friend and couldn't imagine my leaving him for the next four years. There would be plenty of time to finish school; he was immortal, too…

Jake must've noticed my lapse into silence, because he suddenly shook me gently. "Ness?" he asked with concern. "You ready to go?"

I tilted my head up to him and smiled. "Yes, Jacob. I'm ready."

He reached for my hand with a grin and hoisted me onto his back. As we ran home, I allowed myself to imagine my life as Jacob Black's imprint, my eternity with the best friend I'd ever had and his constant care and love. I found myself warming up to the idea, and though I still didn't know what to expect from the future, I realized that any future without Jacob would be meaningless. If I were his imprint, then our friendship would be guaranteed forever. The rest would follow.

I didn't bother to ask Jacob if he had imprinted on me. Instead, I smiled and tucked the theory into my happy, thrumming heart, where I would cherish it.

The next day, we began our trek to North Dakota, and it was the most exhilarating run of my life. We left the glass house at twilight so we could travel in stealth. But in the dense woods of Canada, there was no need to be careful. The ten of us let loose completely and allowed the "monsters" within us to break free.

I had never run so fast, not even when Jake and I raced during our hunts. There was never enough forest to be worth this speed; at this rate, we could go from Forks to La Push in less than five minutes, maybe three. Alice said that we'd be in Westhope by my bedtime. I hoped that she was right; as thrilling as this trip was, it was also very tiring.

I glanced over at my best friend, who was running in his wolf form. He was grinning from ear to ear, his tongue lolling from his mouth and flapping in the wind. He barked once.

"Jacob wants to race with you, Nessie," Daddy called. "Can you beat him to that stream over there?" There was a happy trickling sound not far to the northeast. I could reach it in seconds, but would Jacob be faster?

There was only one way to find out. "You'd better not let me win," I warned him. He let out a loud bark of a laugh and picked up his pace until he was a blur in the trees.

The race was harder than I anticipated. Jake and I rarely had enough open space to run this fast, so I had only ever seen him run in his human form when we played baseball with my family or tag with the pack. I pumped my legs even faster, but I came nowhere close to Jake's speed. He was full werewolf, much more impressive than my half-vampire state.

I panted as I reached the stream, my heart trilling in my chest. "I've never seen you run that fast!" I exclaimed.

Jacob, sitting in his human form against a tree, snorted. "That's because you don't pay attention, dear," he joked. "Can you imagine what would happen if a mortal caught me running that fast?"

"I doubt they'd be able to see you, Jacob," my dad answered from behind. He moved toward us. "That was an impressive run," he said. Grandfather nodded with interest. "Have you tested the limit to your speed?"

"Leah and I have had our little contests," Jake answered. "But the fastest I've ever run was the day of your wedding. This race with Nessie doesn't even compare." He suddenly snapped his mouth shut, as if he had betrayed important information, and glanced at me with concern.

But I wasn't at all hurt by his statement. I knew from the family histories that he used to be in love with Momma. This was old news to me that, though it stung at first, had faded quickly with my unconditional acceptance of Jake and his life before I was born. Besides, a little race with a good friend wasn't as crucial as making it to your best friend's wedding.

I touched his arm gently and showed him my reasoning. He smiled with relief.

Daddy nodded at our exchange. "Should we carry on?" he suggested. Our family settled back into their usual formation, but Jacob tilted his head at Daddy, who shrugged.

What? I wanted to know, pressing my palm against his.

"Be right back," Jake answered, giving me a swift peck on the cheek. He ran behind the trees to strip and phase again. When he came back, he motioned for me to climb on his back. So that's what he asked my dad. I gladly obliged. After that race, I was ready for a little rest.

I lowered myself until I was flat on my stomach and absentmindedly stroked his fur. It was really soft and thick, like a puppy's. There were these neat color patterns that I had never noticed before, little stripes and dots scattered throughout. Maybe they were freckles?

I fell asleep to his confident strides and deep inner hum, my face buried in his neck.

When I awoke, I was in a new bed in a new room. I frowned at the forest green and brown swirls on the walls and my bedspread of embroidered leaves. It was very me, but also unfamiliar. I wondered how long I'd been lying here.

As I sat up, I heard soft snoring. I looked for the source of the sound. Jacob, still in his wolf form, was curled up on a rug beside my bed, barely able to fit in the small space between my bed and the wall.

I smiled. Only Jake would stay here to protect me in a foreign place. Once, I would've felt bad keeping him in his uncomfortable wolf form, but he assured me that, after spending so much of his time as a wolf, it was just as comfortable to sleep in either form.

"We have different instincts and comforts as wolves," he told me. "If I tried to sleep like a human, then of course I would be uncomfortable. But if I let my wolf instincts take over, it's very easy."

I believed him. It seemed very sensible to me, being accustomed to the mythological world.

I glanced at the clock on my bedside table. 6:37 a.m. Normally I slept later, but at the moment, I couldn't fall asleep again, and I knew that my family was probably itching for some action, namely registering for school, which would start next week.

I showered and dressed in a flurry, finding a comfortable but stylish blue sundress, brown belt, and vintage cowboy boots that suited me perfectly. Alice had already organized everything exactly the way I liked it, so even with a closet full of new clothes, it was like being back home. When I returned to my bedroom, Jacob was dressed, too, in a nice pair of jeans and an olive green polo.

"Morning, Ness," he greeted with a fond smile. He crossed the room in three long strides and scooped me into a hug.

"Good morning, yourself," I laughed, beaming at my friend. "You sleep well?"

"Like a dog," he quipped, smirking.

I mock punched him in the arm. "Thanks for staying with me," I said earnestly.

Jake smiled. "Anytime, Nessie. You know that."

He reached for my hand, and I took it willingly. We half-ran down the halls of our new house, Jacob leading the way since I had been asleep the first time. I discovered that only my parents and I lived on this corner of the house, with everyone else dispersed to their own corners. Lining the walls were family photos centered on the three of us, although a few of them included Jacob and various other members of the family. In between our bedrooms was a parlor area with Daddy's piano and music collection, some of Momma's favorite classics, and artwork that I had produced over the last five years. I asked Jacob what the rest of the house looked like, but he shuddered and answered that he hadn't checked, for obvious reasons. I assumed, based on our décor, that each corner was designed to reflect the tastes of the couple.

Jacob, as he later informed me, had his own loft-style apartment upstairs, which Grandmother had designed to give him a sense of independence but also a space where he could entertain the pack. There was a mini-kitchen with a stocked fridge, a high counter with bar stools, a large recreation area with a huge plasma-screen TV, and extra guest rooms. I couldn't wait to see his home for myself.

When we arrived in the living room, my family was waiting for us.

"You kids ready?" Grandfather asked. "Jacob, I hope you remembered your papers."

Jacob patted the pocket of his black jeans. "All here and accounted for," he answered.

Grandfather nodded. We piled into two separate cars; Grandfather drove Grandmother and my family in his Mercedes, and Emmett took the rest in Rosalie's BMW, since everyone except for me was pretending to be younger. Daddy, who was forever 17, and Jacob were posing as freshmen, like me. And since Daddy was a freshman, of course 18-year-old Momma aged down a little, too. Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett decided to be juniors; none of them wanted to endure too much of high school after only a five-year break. It was a good mix, and it guaranteed us four years, maybe more, before we had to move again.

When we arrived at Westhope High School, the receptionist of the guidance office, a recent college graduate who called herself Lindsey, greeted us with a large stack of new student paperwork. We divvied up the pile among us and claimed scattered chairs in the room, ready to put on a little act as we filled out the forms based on our new identities. While we examined the documents and wrote with exaggerated slowness, at least for a vampire, Jacob came in quietly with his papers.

"Can I help you?" Lindsey asked him, glancing up. I noticed her blush a little when she saw him. I wanted to glare at her, but Daddy muttered nearly indistinctly to just let it go. I lowered my eyes to my form, trying to sort through these new, biting emotions swirling inside me, but continued to watch them from my periphery.

"Hey," Jake murmured. "I filled these out a few days ago and need to register. I'm a freshman this year."

"Of course. I'd be happy to register you," she simpered. Simpered. It was all I could do not to growl as she gave him a slow once-over, her eyes lingering at various points. He was my best friend.

"Easy, Renesmee," Momma whispered. I saw Jake's hand clench.

"If you would just fill out a class schedule for me," she continued, "then I'll try to fit you in. You said that you're a rising freshman?" Her voice was dubious, and her face fell for a moment as she realized the implications of her question. He looked so much older than the typical high school student.

"Yes, ma'am," Jake answered politely. He took the paper from her hand and sat down across from us, giving a small nod in greeting. I curbed my normal level of enthusiasm and shared a small, friendly wave with him. He smiled almost gratefully.

The receptionist sat down to do some filing, and I found it easier to concentrate on my forms. I effortlessly filled in my name, birthday, and schooling information that I had memorized, but I had to giggle a bit.

"I want to hear the joke," Alice called softly.

I glanced at Daddy, who tilted his head and chuckled. "Renesmee is amused by her age relative to the other freshmen," he explained quietly, so only we could hear.

Momma laughed. "Just wow them with your intelligence and they'll never have to know," she told me.

I nodded happily and continued writing. Along with the other perks of being half-vampire, I had inherited the vampire photographic memory and overall clarity of thought. I couldn't wait to be "challenged" by high school work.

I glanced up at Jacob a few times. Each time, he watched me steadily before averting his gaze. And each time, I tucked my head down with a smile. I was so happy to be in high school with my best friend. Even though we had to pretend we didn't know each other, it wouldn't take long to make the appearance of becoming friends. If Lindsey's reaction to Jacob was any indication, he would be a popular kid, so why shouldn't I befriend him?

That was what I told myself, but I really wasn't looking forward to the act. I didn't know how to be a stranger to Jake, to be just another student looking for a friend. I knew how to make friends, definitely, but Jake and I were so close….

I turned in my forms with a sigh and a heavy heart. Jacob was going to live with us for as long as we stayed in Westhope. I might just have to live for those afternoons when school was over and we could be ourselves.