Elizabeth placed some books in her basket after class let out. After church services yesterday, she remained behind as everyone left, needing some time to think and pray. It had done wonders for her state of mind. Though she still wasn't sure what to decide about Nathan, the peace that began when she talked with Bill only grew stronger, even in the midst of her confusion. Right as she finished praying, Joseph came out of the back room. He smiled when he saw her. Elizabeth got the feeling he recognized that she needed some spiritual guidance, because he invited her over for a chat the next day. She agreed, knowing Joseph to be a wise man with good counsel.

Today was their meeting. She wanted to bring something for the children while she was there. She had a new Anne of Green Gables book for Angela, written in Braille, and an adventure story for Cooper. She closed up the school, then made her way to the Canfield home.

Minnie welcomed her with a smile and a hug. Elizabeth gave her the books. "Thank you," Minnie said. "Angela and Cooper will love these." She placed the books on a small table. "Joseph is in the yard, sanding our porch swing."

Elizabeth smiled. "Thank you, Minnie. Maybe we can have tea sometime soon and chat."

"I'd like that," Minnie responded. "Let me know what days work for you, and we'll set something up."

Once the two women finished their pleasantries, Elizabeth headed outside to find Joseph. It was easy to do. The porch swing was off to the side, large and well-built. Joseph was running a piece of sandpaper over the beams. When he saw her, a smile split his face. "Elizabeth! Good to see you." He nodded to the swing. "Would you like to sit?"

She nodded, giving him a return smile. "Thank you." The swing was comfortable, rocking back and forth easily. Joseph sat beside her. They were quiet for a few moments. Elizabeth got the distinct impression he was praying. She closed her eyes and breathed a prayer of her own. Moments later, Joseph turned to look at her. "You've been troubled," he stated.

She blinked, not expecting such forthrightness. But moments later, she found herself telling Joseph the entire story. She began with her marriage and subsequent loss, then moved to meeting Nathan and adjusting to have a new Mountie in town, the pursuit of both him and Lucas, Nathan's obvious like of her but inability to ask her out, him finally finding the courage to do so and almost dying the same day, her inability to figure out her feelings and make a decision, and the fear that held her captive.

Joseph listened without interruption. His gentle brown eyes were focused on her, and Elizabeth knew instinctively that he was truly listening and processing everything she said. When she finally finished, she leaned back against the swing, relief flooding her. Telling the whole story had a strangely powerful effect – she felt a freedom that hadn't been there moments before.

Joseph seemed deep in thought. When he finally broke the silence, his voice was gentle. "I'm sorry for what you've been through. Losing a spouse is a very tragic thing."

Tears swam in her eyes, but she blinked them away. "Yes," she said simply.

He turned to look at her fully. "What do you feel for Nathan, Elizabeth? What's in your heart?"

She'd heard that question often. First Rosemary, then Nathan, now Joseph. She drew in a deep breath, one face coming to mind. Nathan had been there for her in so many ways. He was kind and respectful and patient. He hadn't said he was in love with her, but Elizabeth knew that he was. Only love would weather what she'd put him through, however unintentionally. She felt her throat work. "I think I'm in love with him," she said quietly, almost afraid to say the words out loud. "If Nathan wasn't a Mountie, I don't think I would have this block."

Joseph studied her. "And what if he gave up his job? Would that put your fears to rest?"

Elizabeth paused. Would it? Her mind immediately jumped to Lee's accident several months ago. Rosemary had been on the verge of losing him because of a freak accident. Lee's job was generally considered safe, but that day it nearly killed him. Most of the women in town lost their husbands in a single day because of the coal mining accident that occurred right before Elizabeth moved to Coal Valley. Cody nearly died because of a ruptured appendix.

Death was a part of life. Elizabeth realized that with a start. She knew Nathan would give up the Mounties if she asked. He'd told her as much, but she didn't want to ask that of him. He loved protecting this town. She couldn't ask him to give it up because she was scared.

The realization rushed over her. Part of the reason she loved Nathan was because of his protectiveness and his commitment to his country. More than that, though, she loved his dedication to his family and his kindness. He was everything she could hope for in a man. Was she really willing to let fear keep that from her? Was fear stronger than love?

As if reading her thoughts, Joseph quietly quoted a verse from the Bible. "Perfect love casts out fear."

Elizabeth looked at him, tears swimming in her eyes. "Is it really that easy?"

Joseph chuckled. "Easy, no. Simple, yes." He placed a hand over hers. "Love always involves risk, Elizabeth. If we want to keep our hearts safe, we need to lock them away and never let anyone inside. That's the only way to keep from getting hurt." He squeezed her hand. "It's also no way to live."

Elizabeth thought about all the people in her life. She thought of her son. She couldn't imagine closing them out because she was afraid of losing them. So why was she doing that with Nathan? If she could just get out of her own way, maybe she could find another love like the one she'd had with Jack. It would be different with Nathan, just like her relationships with her friends were different, but the end result would be the same: a great love.

Hope sprang up inside, warring with the fear. "How do I let go, Joseph?" Elizabeth asked softly, looking at her hands. "How do I overcome the fear inside?"

"You do what you're afraid to do," Joseph said simply. "Sometimes facing your fear is the only way to get past it."

Always do what you're afraid to do. She immediately flashed back to the day Nathan had given her a plaque bearing that quote. She inadvertently gasped, a hand going to her heart. "It was a sign even then," she murmured.

"What was?" Joseph asked, confusion crossing his face.

Elizabeth started, then chuckled. "Nathan gave me a plaque over a year ago with a saying very much like the one you just said," she replied. "Maybe that was God's way of preparing me for the hard road that would lie ahead. Of all the quotes Nathan could have chosen, it was one that speaks directly to my situation."

Joseph grinned. "The Lord works in mysterious ways. It sounds like that was something you needed to hear."

"Yes," Elizabeth breathed. "It seems so." She looked up at him. "I know I need to give Nathan an answer soon. He's been in limbo for a while now. He deserves to know how I feel and if I'm willing to give us a chance."

"Don't rush anything," Joseph cautioned. "You don't want to make a snap decision that you later regret. If you're not ready, that's okay. Nathan and I have had some chats. I don't think it's breaking his confidence if I tell you he meant it when he said he would wait."

Elizabeth smiled, her eyes softening. "I know. I think I'm getting closer, Joseph. Maybe I'm not ready to make a decision now, but hopefully I will be soon." Impulsively, she threw her arms around his neck. "Thank you for meeting with me. I appreciate your guidance."

Joseph chuckled, hugging her back. "I just listened, Elizabeth. You sorted through most of that on your own." He smiled. "Remember one thing: love is a choice. It's something you have to choose each and every day, through good times and bad times."

His final words stayed with Elizabeth the rest of the day. She pondered everything he had told her. One thing became more and more evident – it wouldn't be long before she could give Nathan an answer. Hopefully it would be one that made them both happy.

By Monday afternoon, Jeanette had yet to give Lucas an answer about moving to Hope Valley. He di

dn't push her, knowing she needed time to think things through. He'd made the mistake of pushing Elizabeth when she wasn't ready; he didn't intend to make that mistake with the one woman he truly loved.

Jeanette was out on a walk. Lucas knew she would return soon. He set about making a simple dinner for the two of them. By the time she returned, he had shrimp in butter sauce over pasta, a salad, and hunks of bread. White wine completed the meal. Jeanette smiled at him in appreciation. "You didn't have to do this, Lucas."

He took her hand, pressing a kiss to the back of it before helping her into her chair. "I wanted to." Their eyes met and held. A light blush filled Jeanette's cheeks as a small smile tugged at her lips. She glanced down at her plate as if to hide her reaction. Lucas sat across from her. They said a blessing over the meal, then began eating. Halfway through, Jeanette put down her fork and looked him in the eyes.

"I've come to a decision."

Lucas slowly finished chewing a piece of bread. Nothing in Jeanette's expression hinted at what that decision might be. Afraid of losing her before he'd found her, he folded his hands on the table. "I'm listening."

She drew in a breath. "I accept your offer to come to Hope Valley."

Joy welled inside of him. "You do?" He tried to keep the words casual, but a hint of his excitement might have come through, because Jeanette smiled.

"Yes, Lucas, I do. The way you've talked about the town and the people – it really speaks to me. I long for connection and community. It sounds like Hope Valley might be a good place to find it." She reached out, covering his hands with hers. "And you'll be there. That alone makes me inclined to settle there." Her smile became wistful. "You've always been such a good friend to me, through the good and the bad. I trust you implicitly. If you think Hope Valley would be good for me, I believe you."

Her belief in him was astounding. Lucas slid one of his hands over hers, a desire to protect her from the hardships of life filling him so intensely, he lost his breath. "Then Hope Valley it is," he said softly.

Jeanette nodded. "Would you mind if we left sooner rather than later? Everything is finished here. There's really no point in delaying any longer."

"Of course," he replied. "I've been thinking about buying a car. I talked to a gentleman yesterday who wants to sell his. Perhaps I can make an offer, and we can drive to Hope Valley rather than taking a train. It will cut the length of the trip by a large margin, and we can stop along the way if needed."

Jeanette smiled. "Why am I not surprised that you're already thinking ahead?" she said. "That sounds like a great plan." She pulled her hands back, lifting her wine glass for a sip. "A car, huh?"

Lucas chuckled, spreading his hands. "What can I say? I've been wanting one for a while now. This gives me the perfect excuse to finally buy a vehicle. And we can pack all your belongings in the back. We'll have to ship the vanity and hutch, but that shouldn't be too difficult. I'll make all the arrangements tomorrow. We can leave whenever you like."

"How about Thursday?" Jeanette suggested. "That will give me time to finish the few things that need to be done to finalize the sale of the house, and I can say goodbye to my neighbors."

"Sounds good to me," Lucas replied. He smiled at her, lifting his glass in a toast. "To a new life."

Jeanette clinked her glass against his. "I'll drink to that." She smiled, taking a sip of the wine. "Thank you, Lucas. For everything."

Warmth pulsed through him. He gave her a tender smile. "It's my pleasure, Jeanette."

Feeling more at peace, Elizabeth hoped her sleep would reflect the fact. Monday night, she slept fine. But when she went to bed on Tuesday, she was plagued with another disturbing dream.

Sitting in the church, Elizabeth felt the presence of a man beside her. An engagement ring rested on her finger, the same ostentatious one given to her by Lucas in his office. Frowning, Elizabeth looked up to see him beside her. He smiled, wrapping an arm possessively around her shoulders. "I'm so glad the next wedding will be ours," he whispered in her ear.

Elizabeth suppressed a shudder. She didn't want to marry Lucas. Her eyes automatically searched the church, looking for Nathan. Though she had rejected him, her heart still yearned for him. But she had made her choice. She had chosen a life without him.

She'd never felt more depressed.

He was nowhere to be seen. Elizabeth let out a small sigh, then stood with the rest of the congregation as the wedding march started. Everyone turned to see the bride. Faith walked down the aisle on Carson's arm. Elizabeth frowned. Carson was the groom. Why was he walking Faith down the aisle?

A feeling of foreboding came over her. Elizabeth tore her gaze from Faith, frantically looking to the front of the church where the groom waited. He stood tall and proud, resplendent in his red dress serge, a smile on his face as he gazed tenderly at his bride.

Nathan.

Elizabeth uttered a broken cry, falling back onto the pew. No one noticed. The wedding proceeded as if she wasn't there. Her heart felt like it was breaking in two the entire time. When Joseph proclaimed them husband and wife, Nathan leaned down to kiss Faith. Elizabeth squeezed her eyes shut, unable to watch.

"This was your choice."

A firm voice at her right made Elizabeth jump. The people in the church faded away. Her late husband looked back at her with an even gaze. "This is the consequence of you rejecting Nathan's love." Jack's eyes bored into hers. "Is this really what you want?"

Elizabeth woke with a gasp, her heart racing. Tears stung her eyes, spilling down her cheeks. Once again, the dream had felt so real. This one might have been the worst yet. The others were awful, but watching Nathan marry another woman carried a whole different level of heartache.

It was still dark, but Elizabeth knew there was no way she was falling back asleep. She slipped into her robe and walked down to the kitchen. Perhaps a cup of tea would help calm her nerves. She set about boiling some water. Restlessness consumed her. She began pacing back and forth in her living room waiting for the water to get hot.

Glancing out the window, she noticed a light on at the Coulter's house. She looked at the clock. It was four in the morning, too early for either Lee or Rosemary to be up. On impulse, she slipped out of the house and quietly knocked on her friends' door.

Rosemary pulled it open. She also wore a robe. "Elizabeth," she said, keeping her voice down. "Is something wrong?"

"I saw your light and thought you might be awake," Elizabeth whispered. "Would you like to come over for a bit? I have the kettle on for tea."

"Sure," Rosemary said, smiling wearily. "I can't seem to sleep anyway."

The two women walked over to Elizabeth's just as the kettle began whistling. Elizabeth prepared the tea, then brought it to the settee where Rosemary was waiting. "What is keeping you up?" Elizabeth asked, warming her hands with the teacup.

Rosemary smiled. "A good reason," she said softly. "I'm going to have a baby."

Elizabeth's mouth dropped. "What?" A smile broke out on her face. "Rosemary! That's incredible news! When did you find out?"

Her friend flushed. "A couple weeks ago."

Elizabeth stared at her. "A couple weeks?" She gaped. "How did you manage not to say anything?"

Rosemary shook her head. "Lee and I have been trying to have a baby for a while," she said. "Nothing was happening. When I became pregnant, I was worried I might miscarry this child, so I was hesitant to say anything. It's still early. Carson had a method of detecting pregnancy within the first two months. He thinks I'm right at the two month mark. There's still a danger I could lose the baby. Lee and I were thinking of waiting to announce that we've having a child until the danger has passed and I start showing."

Elizabeth took her hand. "Have you had miscarriages before?" she asked softly.

Rosemary nodded, tears sparkling in her eyes. "Twice."

Hurting for her friend, Elizabeth placed her teacup down so she could hug Rosemary. "And you went through it alone? You never said anything."

Sniffing, Rosemary accepted Elizabeth's comfort. "I wasn't sure what to say," she admitted. "It's not really something women talk about." She swallowed hard. "I'm so afraid of losing this baby too, Elizabeth. My mind tells me not to get attached because I could lose it. But I can't help it." A tear slipped down her cheek. "It would crush me to lose this child. Part of me wishes I could lock my heart up and be indifferent until I know the danger is gone. But I can't." Her expression softened, a hand going to her stomach. "I already love my baby more than words can say."

"Love is stronger than fear," Elizabeth murmured. As she heard herself, her eyes went wide.

Rosemary nodded. "Exactly. I can't hold my heart back from this baby just because I'm afraid." She shook her head. "That's no way to live."

A million emotions rushed through Elizabeth. Joseph's words the other day came back to her. Perfect love casts out fear. Rosemary was choosing to love her unborn child despite her fear. She'd lost two babies. It would be so easy to remain detached to the third. But instead, she chose to get attached. Because she loved.

Tears welled in Elizabeth's eyes. She hugged Rosemary closer, amazed at her friend's strength. "I'm here for you, Rosemary," she murmured. "Happy outcome or not, you won't go through it alone this time."

Both women were crying by that point, holding each other and providing comfort in a way only friends could. When they pulled back, Rosemary laughed softly, wiping away her tears. "I appreciate that, Elizabeth. Thank you." She picked up her tea, taking a fortifying sip. "Now you know why I'm awake at this unearthly hour. Why are you awake?"

Elizabeth shook her head, remembering the horrible dream. "I had another nightmare."

Rosemary eyed her. "About Nathan?"

"Yes." Elizabeth took her own sip of tea. "I was engaged to Lucas. We were at a wedding." Rosemary's nose scrunched, but she nodded and waited for Elizabeth to continue. "It was Faith's wedding," Elizabeth said. "I thought she was marrying Carson, but he was walking her down the aisle. When I turned to the front, it was Nathan waiting for her at the altar." She shuddered once more, trying to block out the image of Nathan marrying another woman. "I felt sick, Rosemary. Absolutely sick."

Her friend tilted her head. "So the thought of Nathan marrying anyone is repugnant to you?"

Elizabeth nodded. "I know that sounds awful since I haven't been able to give him an answer about a simple date. But I can't help feeling the way I do."

Rosemary smiled. "It sounds like you love him. And it sounds like you want to be the one to marry him." Elizabeth opened her mouth, but Rosemary hurried on. "Someday, of course. Not tomorrow."

Elizabeth smiled at that. "It would be easy to picture a life with him," she admitted. "Honestly, it's a very appealing thought. I just…" She huffed, annoyed with herself. "It's the fear, Rosemary. It's strong. I'm not quite sure how to shake it."

Her friend was quiet for a time. "Do something for me, would you?" she asked gently. "Close your eyes."

Elizabeth's brow furrowed, but she did as Rosemary requested. "Now," Rosemary continued, "picture yourself near the end of your life. What do you see?"

Images swam before Elizabeth's eyes. Children ran in the yard, laughing and playing. Adults stood nearby, chatting. Elizabeth recognized two of them: grown-up versions of Allie and Jack, each with their own spouses. She herself was sitting on a rocker on a front porch, holding hands with a man. When she looked to the side, Nathan's aged face smiled back at her.

Eyes snapping open, Elizabeth sucked in a breath. "Oh my."

Rosemary smiled gently. "Do you have your answer?"

Elizabeth caught her breath. "I might." She bit her lip. "I think I need a little more time to reflect. Maybe I'll go out to Jack's land tomorrow and talk with him." She shook her head ruefully. "He's made his position perfectly clear in my dreams."

"Oh?" Rosemary asked.

Elizabeth smiled wryly. "Let's just say he didn't approve of my decisions. He obviously wanted me to be with Nathan." She paused, something occurring to her. "I wonder if that's been his way of sending me a message from heaven." She glanced up. "Do you think that's possible?""

"It could be," Rosemary said. "Who knows? But I think it's a good idea to go to Jack's land. Maybe you'll finally have clarity."

Elizabeth's smile became soft and genuine. "I think I'll do that after school, then." She hugged Rosemary once more. "Thank you for listening and understanding. You are a wonderful friend."

Rosemary hugged her back. "As are you."

The peace that had eluded her since the dream came rushing back. She had a plan, and she had a feeling that thinking on Jack's land would give her the answers she was looking for. Hope sprang up inside. It felt like she was growing ever closer to her decision. She had a feeling it was going to be one that brought joy not only to herself, but to her son, her student, and the man she suspected she had fallen in love with.