A/N I do not own twilight characters but the plot is from my imagination :)

Present Day

EPOV

The emptiness continued with me everyday after that moment. My family grew with the introduction of Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett, but my heart was devoid of anything. Esme grew tense with worry and Carlisle cast a suspective eye upon me after that time.

Time passed. Days became weeks. Weeks became years. Years became decades. The pain somehow dulled over time, yet the short stab still remained. I never revealed to Carlisle what happened that night. It was too painful for me to reveal the mistakes I had made and to expose myself to him fully. However, motherly instincts from Esme escalated as she saw my withdrawal and as time elapsed as we moved around the US, from one place to another.

First, Alaska. Our family joined another coven shortly with the introduction of Rosalie and Alice. It provided control over the two most volatile family members, and it also provided company. Too much company.

I didn't realise at first, the small conversations between Carlisle and the Denali coven did not interest me at first. But I quickly realised that he had tried to find me company of a different sort.

Tanya was the most beautiful. Her hair was spun of the finest ice-white silk, her eyes cut from the brightest topaz and her lips were full and blossoming. She had shown me interest of a different kind, and Carlisle noticed and decided that I needed something to distract me from the endless depression that I faced. I encouraged the attention at first. Attention from someone other than my protective family was refreshing and she seem interested enough to listen. But I could never reveal to her that her ice-white hair brung nothing upon the mahogany of her hair. Her topaz eyes were dull compared to the enticing deep coffee that she had and that her lips paled compared to lips which pulsated warm with blood.

Time continued, and I could see she was getting restless at my constant pulling away until I isolated myself. The memory was as crisp as the snow which lay upon the frozen ground that day.

"Edward, can't you see? You don't have to be alone, you are not the monster you say you are. I've never felt this way before, and your right here. Why can't we just be what we could be rather than waiting... waiting. What are you waiting for?" Tanya stood upon the balcony, looking back into the room with eyes hooded with lust.

"Tanya, I can't. I don't love you, like you love me, if that is love at all" I looked away from the eyes, now filled with venom and anger. I could read Tanya as if a book, first I dismissed her feelings as pure friendship. As they grew, blossomed and flowered I shyed away from peering into her mind. "Tanya, we can't be together"

And with that, she disappeared into the cold night.

I had a chance to find love, a kind of love which didn't penetrate my whole body but which left my carnal instincts satisfied. But how could I betray my heart, the memory of her hair...

Soon after, the letter came. The swirling script on the front was so perfect and feminine, I have left it shut as I have left my heart shut to Tanya. I would never open that letter until my time was about to close, and I would find out the depth of Tanya's feelings.

Carlisle soon became aware of the situation, and realised that it wasn't safe to be around a coven of female vampires who had a broken heart amongst their protection. We moved, state to state. City to city. Town to town before we settled in Forks.

Forks was the rainiest place in the continental US. It allowed us on average 298 days where we could be openly seen without shocking the frail human population. We returned here with each new generation. Soon Emmett came, followed by Jasper. And I saw my sisters fall in love just as I had. Yet they could experience love, and I was trapped inside unbreakable shell. It drove my introverted self further into dereliction.

I was happy for them. And the happiness that I felt turned into hatred for what I had done.. what I had let go.

The siren fired when Alice had experienced a vision. She had foreseen my future deeply during that tense biology lesson, she saw that I had once loved and that the consequences of that love and selfishness were soon going to be wrapped up. Her muscles tensed considerably, her eyes strained with venom once she realised that I was leaving. And I was not coming back.

I really hated the last chapter two, so I recreated and moulded one which befitted the story alot more. Also I think it ties in better with the other chapters. I'm sorry it's short but I really have writers block from thinking about chapter four. I'm thinking alot more mystery and maybe alot more BPOV? ;)

Please review and I will update as soon as I can!