Chapter 16.

A/N so here we are, back to Meg's POV again… wish me luck.

I hated this. But most of all I hated myself. How could I do this to Erik and Christine? Oh, that's right. Because I have no want to go to jail for something that didn't even work. And I didn't fancy being put in a hospital bed…

"Very good Meg." Raoul said coming up to me, holding Gustave's hand.
"Let me go! I want my mother!" Gustave said.

"No point. There's nowhere to go on a boat Gustave. You're with Meg and I now and there's nothing to do about it."

I could see tears in his eyes. I felt so sorry for the poor thing.

"Meg." Raoul said. "Watch him while I go to the bar." And he turned around and left.

"Gustave I am so, so sorry. I really didn't want to do this and I'm trying to think of a way to get you back to your mother." I said after a few minutes silence.

He just looked away. "I don't believe you."

"You have to. I'm your only friend on this ship and I'm going to help you get back. I'm sending this letter off to your mother telling her what's going on." I said pulling a letter out of my dress pocket. "But you can't let Raoul know okay? It has to remain a secret."

"Why did you do it if you didn't want to?" He asked starting to cry.

I pulled a handkerchief out of my pocket and handed it to him. "Because Raoul threatened me with jail and a beating if I didn't help him."

I stood up and looked over the side of the boat. "Look, I know I haven't been the most trustworthy person you've ever met but I wasn't thinking right that night. I need help, I know that, my mother knows that. I think just about everyone does."

"I thought you hated me." Gustave said.

"I did at the time. But I couldn't hate the son of the man I love. I just can't."

"Do you really love my father?" Gustave asked coming to stand next to me.

I nodded. "As much as your mother does."

"Why?" He asked.

"I don't know. Why does your mother love him? I bet she couldn't answer either."

We stayed in silence until the bell went to tell us that lunch was ready.

"Come on." I said holding my hand out. "Let's go."

He took my hand and we walked down to the dining area.

We were eating lunch when Raoul came up to us.

"Why did you leave?" He asked sitting down across from us.

"We were hungry Raoul so we came to eat."

"I didn't tell you that you could move though did I?" he asked.

"No. But we aren't prisoners Raoul. We'll get food if we want to."

"Fine. But don't walk off on me again."

We went back to eating and Raoul went back to the bar, leaving Gustave and I alone again.

"Gustave." I said.

"Yes?" He asked looking up from his orange juice.

"This boat is going to stop in a few days."

"In Paris?"

"No, In England. Don't ask me why but I'll send the letter off then okay?"

"Alright." He said. "Can I go back up now? I'm getting hot."

"Okay." I said standing up and starting to walk away.

"Shouldn't we tell Raoul where we're going?"

"Oh who cares?" I said. "He thinks he's all high and mighty anyway."

Gustave laughed a little at this and followed after me back up stairs.

The weeks past and finally we got to London. I gave the letter, addressed to Erik, to the man in uniform who said he would post it straight away.

"All done." I said to Gustave that night as I walked into his room. "Hopefully they'll get the letter soon."

"I hope so." Gustave said. "I miss them so much." He said.

I sighed and sat on the edge of his bed. "Gustave I really am sorry."

"I know." He said rolling over to go to sleep. "Just don't do it again please."

I laughed at him slightly and kissed the top of his head. "I won't. I promise."

I walked out of the room turning the light off as I did. When I walked out I got the shock of my life. Raoul was sitting on my bed.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"I've come to see how motherhood is treating you."

"Fine thank you. Now, can you leave please? I want to get some sleep."

"I was thinking maybe I could stay the night." He said with a glint in his eyes.

"Oh no." I said. "Once was enough."

"Oh come on. What's the worst that could happen?" He asked, walking over to me with a stager. He was drunk again and I hated the smell of whisky.

"Raoul you're drunk." I said.
"No I'm not." He said, pining me against the wall. All I had to do was open the door and move and he would fall flat on his face, giving me enough time to shut the door and lock it.

"Look, Raoul." I said moving my hand to the door knob. "I'm not interested in sleeping with you."
"Why not?" He asked, putting his face close to mine. "I thought you were a slut."
That did it. I brought my knee up and bent down in pain.

"Don't you ever, ever call me that! I am not a slut!" I said pushing the door open and guiding him out.

I sat on my bed and started to cry, I always knew it. Ever since it crossed mind that I was the only thing we had to help Erik. I never liked what I was doing, I hated it. It made me feel dirty which is why I would go to swim every day.

I put my head down on the pillow and hoped and prayed that Christine and Erik got my letter, and cried myself to sleep.