Chapter 18

A/N Still talking about self-harm. Very sorry if it is offence to anyone, but a friend gave me the idea.

"What do you mean?" He asked, pushing me back to look me in the eye.

I sighed and rolled the sleeve up to just past my elbow to show him the scares. His eyes widened with shock and he grabbed my arm.

"Letter opener." I said. I knew he was going to ask so I told him anyway.

"And I made you do this?"

"Yes and no." I said looking down at my arm where his hand ran over the old cuts.

"What do you mean?" He said meeting my eye. I walked away and sat on my bed.

"When you left, I was extremely upset and Raoul didn't know why, he tried everything he could to cheer me up but nothing worked. Once I found out about Gustave, I had to marry Raoul and for one day, I was slightly happy. Once Gustave was born, and I went back to singing, Raoul started to drink and got violent. I was scared of him, he would hit me when I came home later then I said I was going to. I've had a horrid life since you left Erik; you actually have no idea what exactly I've gone through. When Gustave was 4, He came running to tell me that Raoul had hit him and that sent me over the edge and I confronted him about it."

Erik sat down next to me and took my hand in his.

"What happened?" He asked stroking my hand.
"He hurt me worse than normal. Bashed me and I… I miscarried."
"Gustave was going to have a baby brother or sister?"

"Yes, he was. That's when I hurt myself. I ran to my room crying and it was sitting there… No one has known until now. You can't tell anyone."

"Christine, I didn't know that leaving would make you that sad. I thought that night was just something that happened until you told me you loved me."

"Just promise me you won't tell anyone. Please." I begged.

"I promise." He said. "Your secret is safe with me." He brought my hand up and kissed it.

"Now it's your turn." He said, looking me in the eye.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Promise me that you will never do it again."

"I'll try." I said.

"No, Christine, Promise."

"Erik, it's hard to promise that you won't do something like that again. You have no idea."

"Christine." He said.

I let out a long sigh. "I promise not to do it again."

He leant over and kissed my cheek.