Ch2

She looks my way watching me intently as I eat the lemon and make a face. That's when I hear her laugh. Knowing that she is laughing at me I exaggerate my sour expression to prolong one of my favorite sounds in the world, her laugh.

"Booth, a lemon is not cause for such a face. You are exaggerating, it's not that sour." She says knowing me.

"Are you kidding Bones? That thing was horrible! I have to say I like my cooked fruit much better." I smile at her and take another bite of the lemon. She only shakes her head at me with that look, that one that makes me smile. You know that one look that holds a spark in her eyes as they lock onto mine. That's the one.

"Booth, I enjoy fruit as well. We both do. Uncooked citrus fruit is what I like best and you like cooked apples." She said, I could tell her mind was elsewhere. I knew where, Angela.

"Bones?" My tone dropped back to a more serious one, and suddenly like a tsunami the events of recent yesterdays washed over both of us.

"Hhmm?"

I placed my hand over hers, I thought I knew what I was going to say but then she looked into my eyes. Neither one of us wanted to speak, no words were needed anyway. I felt as if I had let down my best friend, I had missed my target and we had taken a loss, but none of us thought that, Angela. I mean that, she would…I stare back into Bones blue eyes. Angela was her best friend. Everything was my fault.

"I'm sorry." My voice was a whisper and she closed her eyes withdrawing her hand. When her eyes opened they flashed anger and pain. The playful smile was long gone.

"I told you Booth it wasn't your fault! Stop! Just, just stop. Please Booth!" she didn't realize how loud she had become, her voice and eyes were begging for me to drop it. They begged for something else too, but she wouldn't let me give her that comfort. She wanted to cry so, so bad but wouldn't let herself. Everyone in the diner was now staring at us. While she leaned back into the booth with a sigh, I exhaled deeply and stared at the remaining lemon slices on the table.

Silence had lingered for more time that I could stand I looked up at her surprised when she started to speak. Her voice was a soft whisper. "It's still a fruit, even if variables have changed its still fruit." That's it she didn't look at me, only out the window at the cars that passed the diner.

"Yes it is. Cooked apples and uncooked citrus fruit are different, yet the same none the less." I said slowly and her dark blue eyes flicked back to me settling on mine. Her eyes ones frantic and desperate moments ago locked onto mine screaming help me Booth.

"Come on Bones, I have to run to the bank." I got up, paid and when I returned I cursed myself for the water I saw in her once sky blues. In the expedition she was quiet, which lately was her usual demeanor.

I ran errands and she accompanied me to the grocery store. Now what? It was nearing seven thirty. "Do you want Thai? I was going to get some take out, do you want to come over for a bite?" I smiled at her but didn't receive one in return.

"Thank you Booth, I would like that." She went back to looking out the window, the world passing her by, she liked it that way right now. I knew her IQ and already constant racing mind didn't help her at all. She couldn't escape her mind and now she was in her own prison of yesterdays depressing news. I corned Sweets and asked him if there was anything I could do.

He said if she opened up to anyone and spilled her feelings it would help her tremendously. Oh baby duck, I already knew that. He added before he walked away, "Booth, not that I don't want you to but, why are you asking me? You know better than anyone what Dr. Brennan needs." I looked at him a bit shocked as he turned and walked away. Everyone was still on edge. Sweet dreams were far from invading any of our minds, it would be a while.

We walked into my apartment and to the kitchen. I got some plates and silver wear and in old Seeley Booth fashion splayed it all out on the coffee table in front of the couch we sat upon. The plates now empty laid on the coffee table she sipped on another Jack and Coke.

"Booth?"

"Yeah?"

"I know why this happened and I know how, but-"her blue eyes quickly crashed head on into mine. So many questions, but all I could see was a scared little girl who didn't understand why bad things happened in the world. I saw innocence being shattered as her heart broke. She knew the feeling, knew the emotion but wouldn't let herself acknowledge it.

"Why Booth?" Her voice was strained and it was only then I noticed the tears that she had let spill over. Soon more black tears rolled down her face leaving marks on her porcelain skin as the tears mixed with her mascara on their way down. I tilted her chin up so she would look at me. Her breathing hitched and then she fell forward into me, she finally broke.

"Why? Why her? It should have been me! It should have been me!" She pulled away and looked at me. "Booth, she was going to be a mother, someone's mother!" she was making me feel bad for missing, but even worse for Jack and motherless Michael.

"I don't know Bones."

"Well I do! It's because she was my friend! Because I'm your friend!"

Her words stung, I pushed my feelings down."You don't know that Bones. He could have chosen anyone of us." She stopped hiccupping tears and looked me in the eye.

"But he didn't, and now Michael has no mother, Hodgins is a single father, you think this is all your fault, while I believe it's mine, and the whole lab is cloaked in a type of unforgettable sadness. Work has become what some would call a double edged sword. I both throw myself into it to get a release from my own life and world, but it's also the one place I'm reminded so harshly of my own reality." She started to cry again and I felt her shoulders shaking as I hugged her tighter against me. She wrapped her arms around me leaning in to me closer.

"Booth I hate it, I have come to hate the life I live." I let my own tears fall now and moved her to my lap surprised as she willingly climbed into it like a big child.

"It's okay, sshh baby, I got you. I got now. Sshh, baby." I rocked her like the little girl that she was right now, the child that cried and screamed for her friend. Her friend she would never see again.

She pulled back after about a half hour and looked up at me. "She was my best friend Booth."

"I know, baby." Her eyes danced back and forth for a moment in mind curious of why I had called her what I did. Though, she gave in to my embrace and either she didn't question it or just didn't care as I guided her head with my hand to my chest. I felt her inhale a shaky breath and exhale deeply. We both lay on the couch uncomfortably I sat my back against the arm and my legs sprawled the length of it. She sat in my lap her legs were hanging off the couch. Her arms were wrapped around my neck and her head lay in the crook of it.

Both of our cries had subsided, only silent tears ran down her face now. My eyes were misty, but no drops fell anymore. I stroked her hair gently and she nestled her head into my neck more.

"Booth?" Her voice was a sleep laden whisper.

"Hhmm?"

"Angela would be proud of Hodgins. He takes care of Michael very well." I smiled a bit at her words as I continue to run my fingers through her hair.

"Yeah, she would have been Bones." I kissed her hair and inhaled the smell of her, her shampoo and what made Brennan smell like Bones, my Bones.

"I don't understand it. If there is a God and he is a righteous God, a good God as you speak of then why does he let so much bad happen to good people?" We were both quiet a moment, I didn't know that answer. I couldn't say sometimes shit just happens, Bones. And you move on as best you can. Anything I said wouldn't help anyway.

"Booth, I just, why? You didn't deserve any of what happened to you in your life. You are a good person Booth. You didn't deserve to have someone die in your arms, to lose a friend, to be forced to grow up quickly, and to have your father hit you and Jared. I sometimes irrationally wish that I could erase everyone's pain for them. Take the bad away and replace it with good, but I know it's impossible." I couldn't hold back the single tear that spilled over and ran down my face.

"Bone's look at me." She slowly looked up her tear stained face a contrast of black spider webs against porcelain. Yet, the ugly black webbing faded into the background as I stared into bright blue eyes that dance in my own.

"Bones, you save people every day, everyday Bones. You care so much. So, so much and I wish we could save everyone but-"

"I know, I know I can't save everyone."

"But you try, you try so damn hard."

She repositioned herself and sniffled. "Yet, I couldn't save my best friend. I can only save strangers." she sighed.

"Bones, you tell me to quit and tell me to stop blaming myself. It's time you stop, stop blaming yourself Bones." I spoke to her sternly and soft at the same time. All she did was stared back into my eyes and keep staring at me.

Silent tears fell from her eyes as she kissed my cheek and then laid her head back into the crook of my neck. I was a bit confused.

"Bones, I think we should do something in honor of Angela."

"She is dead Booth. She won't even know we did anything for her. I think it's a silly idea."

"Angela was silly, so it may work. For now you can just close your eyes and say something about her." Booth couldn't see her, but she was quiet so he knew her wheels must have been turning. She picked her head up looked into his eyes and then closed them.

"She was nice."

"Yes, she was Bones."

"I said something about her now it's your turn Booth."

He closed his eyes and she opened hers for a second peeking as he spoke. "She never let me forget what was truly important in life." He opened his eyes to curious blue ones starring back at him. He answered her unsaid question. "Friends and family, they're what's important friends and family."

Brennan hung her head. "I miss her." She whispered the words, finally voicing them aloud. He tilted her chin up to look at him. Brennan closed her eyes again. "She was a good listener too." She said as she tried out a smile, it felt foreign to her lips.

Booth closed his eyes knowing it was his turn now. "She always knew what to-"he stopped speaking as he felt lips, Bones' lips land gently on his. She was going to pull away, but found she couldn't she was the one who begged for him to let her in his mouth. He granted her access and he responded, deepening the kiss. Their tears were now shared on their tongues as they moved back and forth slowly, methodically. Her hands pulled him to her. She needed to be as close as possible.

They parted and Brennan pulled her head back looking into his eyes. "For Angela?" Booth laughed and it felt good to laugh.

"For Angela."

"She would have highly approved."

"She would've."

That was the night that two became one and the angels rejoiced. The party was more of a seventies theme, but none the less rocking. Both heaven and earth were rocking out that night, Angela laughed at what she heard in the other room called heaven. For a woman that claimed not to believe in the Good Lord, her best friend sure knew who he was.

Booth and Brennan lay in bed tired from making love, yes it had happened because they were both vulnerable and their emotions were hay wire. Yes, they could have waited for the 'right time' but when was that, another six years?

"Booth?" she whispered, his arm over her and one underneath he enveloped her completely as his head now lay in the crook of her neck.

"Hhmm?"

"I'm glad you tried the lemon Booth." He smiled getting it and his smile only grew.

"I'm glad you tried the cooked fruit Bones." He chuckled. "A slice of coked fruit and a lemon slice, who would have guessed they went together so well Bones?"

"I did, there is such a thing as lemon meringue pie Booth. It was Angela's second favorite desert next to chocolate cake."

He smiled and kissed her temple. "I love you baby."

He heard her inhale and then exhale softly. He felt her lips brush gently against the back of his hand. "I love you too Booth." She smiled and nuzzled his hand rubbing his thumb with her own. Sleep took them not long after.

The angels looked down upon them, ensuring they would make it through another day. Their bodies ached and they didn't know if they could make it any other way, they had lost so much. Hard times and cold winds were upon them, but when the heavens smiled a light shone through and together the healing began. A certain Angel smiled, "That's right Bren, of course when life gives you lemons you make not lemonade, but a pie." She smiled her Cheshire cat smile and shook her head.

A certain angel peered in on a tired father awake rocking a crying infant. The baby projectile vomited all over its father and the angel laughed. She stood in front of the little boy and his father the child stopped crying and reached toward her. He tried to pick his head up to look at her and smiled what was considered a smile at his age. The Angel smiled back at her son and kissed her husband on the forehead and touched his arm. He looked around the nursery and down at his arm brows furrowed. Then he put sleeping baby Michael down in his crib.

She smiled to herself, and returned to the other room called heaven. In time, they would all know the lives they had saved in time. She turned around and joined the rest of the Angels calling out to faces she had created, but never met. That was the night that sweet dreams returned to all of her friends in the other room, the room called earth.

Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone
Susanne the plans they made put an end to you
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song
I just can't remember who to send it to

I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again

Won't you look down upon me, Jesus
You've got to help me make a stand
You've just got to see me through another day
My body's aching and my time is at hand
And I won't make it any other way

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend

But I always thought that I'd see you again

Been walking my mind to an easy time my back turned towards the sun
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around
Well, there's hours of time on the telephone line to talk about things
to come
Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you, baby, one more time again, now

Thought I'd see you one more time again
There's just a few things coming my way this time around, now
Thought I'd see you, thought I'd see you fire and rain, now

Fire and Rain by James Taylor