John Thornton drove home that evening very upset at what had happened at the Starbucks. He still couldn't believe that the petite woman he had met half an hour earlier that evening had made him feel so incompetent. Who the hell was she to reprimand him like that in front of so many people? "Margaret" he said harshly. Recalling the woman's features, he became angry with himself for finding her attractive despite the lecture she gave him earlier. Well, it didn't matter, he told himself. He was about to go home, freshen up and get ready to meet his girlfriend, Anne Latimer, later in the evening for a romantic dinner at the Chart House. Anne had told him that she had something important to tell him. He wasn't sure what it was but he was desperately hoping that she wouldn't tell him that she was pregnant. The thought had been running through his mind all day and made him extremely irritable to the point of lashing out at the Starbucks employee.
John and Anne had been dating for a little over two years. John loved Anne but couldn't bring himself to propose to her or officially have her live with him (despite the fact that she stayed at his Society Hill row home more often than she stayed at her Fairmount home). Every time he thought about proposing to her he thought about how permanent marriage would make their relationship. That itself disturbed him. Why should he be so scared to make permanent a relationship with a woman who provided steady companionship, occupied his home often and subtly hinted that she was ready for marriage? Although he couldn't admit it to himself, the primary reason why John couldn't bring himself to propose to her was because he wasn't sure if she really loved him or at the very least loved him the way he loved her.
Anne was a news anchorwoman for local TV station WKVI and was quickly rising through the ranks. She started off doing the morning news program. Her long golden blonde hair, svelte figure, and soft feminine face made her impressive to producers at the station. In fact, her looks made more of an impression upon producers than her actual news casting skills. Even if she was sorely lacking in journalistic ability, she brought ratings to the station and seemed to have a connection with viewers (who appreciated her looks as well as her bubbly personality) in the Philadelphia market. Two years after joining WKVI, she was anchoring the 6 & 11 pm newscasts, the apex for local newscasters.
Anne was successful in her own right but always feeling financially vulnerable. It was understandable considering the fickle nature of television news. Anne herself had seen fellow newscasters sacked immediately for a variety of reasons. She also knew that the Philadelphia market was full of viewers who would love a television personality one minute and turn on him or her the next minute for the slightest mistake. So she was looking for a good match that could provide for her in case her career abruptly ended.
When she met John, she knew that he could provide the stability she longed to have. John's career as a CEO of a health insurance company instantly attracted Anne to him. However, she was becoming increasingly impatient with him. They had been together for over two years and she could not figure out why he didn't propose to her yet. Didn't he think they could build a life together? They were practically living together and his mother and sister loved her. She also thought of other reasons why they would make a perfect match such as them having good looking children and the good image they provided to members of Philadelphia society and public. She always got a gleam of satisfaction whenever she caught another woman glancing jealously at her and John. These types of thoughts often ran through Anne's vacuous mind.
This was another reason why John could not propose to her. Although he criticized himself whenever he had those doubts about Anne, he couldn't help but to wonder if he really wanted Anne, with her lack of intellectual curiosity, to be his wife or the mother of his children. John could never talk to Anne about his love of the classics or political theory. He never told Anne that he didn't usually watch her 6 pm news broadcast because he was usually watching the Newshour with Jim Lehrer instead. He found network news to be devoid of anything interesting and watched the Newshour because it actually provided in depth stories of the top news as well as other items of interest.
John occasionally took various classes at his alma mater, the University of Pennsylvania, to keep his mind fresh and challenged. Anne didn't understand why he wasted money on college courses when he already had an MBA from Wharton. They did share a love of the arts, but lately he had begun to wonder if her interest was purely based on a desire to be fashionable to their friends and family.
On this evening, all these doubts were pushed to the back of his mind. Anne's face would be a welcome respite from the beautiful yet haughty face of Margaret, the beguiling stranger who was in John's thoughts a bit too much for comfort. John picked up Anne from her house. She walked to his BMW in a beautiful sleeveless amethyst dress with a draped design that stopped just a couple inches above her knees. Seeing her walk to the car, John thought that no matter her shortcomings, she was always breathtakingly gorgeous. On the other hand, Anne thought to herself once more why John had to drive such a modest car when he could afford such a better one. When Anne got into the car, John gave her a passionate kiss on her soft lips but noticed that the kiss was not returned.
"Is something the matter?" he asked, puzzled at her reaction.
"No, not at all. I am just a bit tired. That's all. Although, I have to say that I am surprised by your display of passion so early in the evening. We haven't even had dinner yet."
"Do you want to stay in tonight? We can cancel the reservation" worried once more that Anne's announcement was about an unwanted pregnancy. When Anne shook her head negatively John continued "I kissed you because it was nice to see a warm, familiar face especially after what happened to me today."
"Oh…" said Anne absentmindedly.
"I had a long day at work and decided to get a latte from a nearby Starbucks before coming home. You know how my temper can be. I completely snapped at the barista when she mixed up my order and in the middle of my screaming at her, this woman comes out of no where and reprimands me."
"Really? Do tell more" replied Anne, who was anxious to hear about this person rattled John.
"She tells me to apologize to the barista for my behavior…that she had never seen a child throw a temper tantrum like the one I was throwing. When I tried to explain myself, she silenced me telling me she wasn't done and continuing with her lecture. She pretty much commanded me to take the latte and leave. I could not believe the impertinence she displayed to me. Granted, I was wrong for handling the situation the way I did, even if the service left a lot to be desired. But she, a stranger, scolding me like a child was just wrong."
"Well, your temper is scary but it sounds like it was the barista's fault for being so stupid. She gets paid enough to not to mess up your order. As for the woman you described, some people just love to jump into other's people business instead of minding their own. She probably just wanted to make herself into some sort of public hero. People like that don't really care about the feelings of strangers, only making themselves look good."
John was taken aback by Anne's analysis of the event even if it put him in a good light. It seemed rather cold and calculating. It made him wonder if she had this view of all human interactions. Did she really think that everything was about ultimately "making one's self look good"? Even if he did not like Margaret interfering in his dispute with the barista he was certain that she didn't do it for attention. Why the hell was he referring to her by name as if he actually knew her? He then thought about why he was mentally defending a woman that he would probably not meet again and who had unashamedly embarrassed him. He was about to respond to Anne but stopped himself. She didn't seem quite herself and decided it was better to ride to the restaurant in silence.
They arrived at the restaurant promptly for their eight o'clock reservation. They ordered their food and made small talk until their main course arrived. After eating most of their food, Anne decided that it was time for her to tell John why she had brought him here.
"John, I guess I should tell you why I brought you out here tonight" said Anne.
John was nervous and took down a gulp of his drink to brace himself.
"You're an amazing boyfriend. I don't think I could ask for anyone better. But that's where the problem lies. You're just an amazing boyfriend and nothing more. At this point in my life I want something more and I don't think you're ready to give that to me."
"You're breaking up with me?" asked John, genuinely surprised.
"Yes, I'm sorry" said Anne while looking down into her lap.
Giving a slight chuckle John said "Although this isn't happy news I have to admit that I was expecting you to tell me something else. I thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant!"
"Me, pregnant? Oh God no!" said Anne laughing. "Not now. I've only just begun my career. I highly doubt the station wants a pregnant newscaster in their midst. So you're not upset?"
Although he was happy to hear she was not pregnant, John felt slightly indignant that she appeared to be laughing at the idea. "Well, of course I'm hurt and upset. This day seems to be a train wreck for me." He looked to see her calm countenance and thought about how it was such a contrast to the storm of emotions he was feeling. "I have to be honest with you. There were times during the past two years when I thought about proposing to you but something was always holding me back. I don't know what it was."
"I've wanted to marry you for some time but I felt that you just didn't feel the same way about me-like you were never going to see me as the one. Plus, I've begun to see that we have very different interests. You are so grave and serious so much of the time."
When Anne said that, John felt annoyed and angry. What did she means by "grave and serious"? Plus, he became aggravated that Anne was not taking responsibility for the demise of their relationship. "In other words, you find my 'interests' to be over your head" he said with a tinge of bitterness.
"John, stop. Let's not make this harder than it has to be." Sighing in exasperation she continued "Perhaps this is the reason why you couldn't propose. You never took me seriously. Your sister Frances told me that you hardly ever watch my broadcasts. I know you watch other broadcasts instead," furrowing her eyebrows slightly. "You take classes for fun while I was only too happy to be finally done with college. I have to be honest and say that I still think it is a waste of money."
"And your pretty gowns and shoes worth thousands of dollars are a great use of money? Tonight's outfit is another fine example of how you put your money to good use. If we're going to be completely honest with each other, I have to say that I find you to be incredibly frivolous, your ridiculous spending sprees being one of the many reasons why." Anne looked shocked by the callousness of his words. "While we're on the topic of money, tell me, is that the reason why you were attracted to me? Why you always seemed so anxious to marry me?"
Anne's silence answered John's question more than any of her words ever could. She struggled desperately in her mind to come up with an answer that would satisfy him but failed. Instead, she could only say "John, that's not fair! You're being a complete jerk right now!"
"And bringing me here to a dinner that I will pay for, only to have you break up with me is not prime example of being a jerk? Oh, and you didn't answer my question. Was it my money that attracted you to me?" He stared at her intently making her bite her lip and stare down once more at her lap to avoid eye contact. Then she looked up at him, angry and with tears in her eyes.
"Oh John, stop being so self righteous. Of course, money played some part in my decision to start dating you. Should I date a bum off the street? I thought you would take this better."
"Perhaps, I would if you didn't try to make it seem like it was entirely my fault. I know I have my shortcomings, but so do you!" He took some more of his drink, thoroughly disgusted with his companion and thinking what to do next. "I'll take you home. This day has been too long, thanks to you," he said with obvious disdain. Not only was he was angry with his now ex-girlfriend, he was still annoyed with Margaret. This day would offer him no peace at all.
When John got to his Gaskill Street home he was greeted by Beyoncé's "Diva" blasting loudly throughout the house. He knew his sister Frances was home alone since she wouldn't dare play her music so loudly around her mother. Walking into the spacious living room, John turned off the deafening music prompting Frances to leave the kitchen, where she was making popcorn, and scold her older brother.
"You know I was listening to that!"
"Yes, you and the entire block. Fran, I really don't need to hear your loud, mindless music tonight."
Rolling her eyes, Frances asked about Anne. "Is Anne staying at her place tonight?"
"Yes, she is and she'll be staying there for the time being."
Realizing what her brother meant, Frances replied "You two broke up! Oh John, I feel so sorry for you. Who is going to be with a boring person like you now?"
"Thanks for the concern" replied her brother sarcastically.
As John and Frances were in the middle of their exchange, their mother, Hannah, walked in. She overheard Frances say that John and Anne had split. She walked into the living room with a concerned, severe look on her face.
She loved her only son dearly and was worried that he had been hurt. She knew her son was strong. He had worked his way through college and business school to support not only himself, but his mother and sister too, after his father died leaving them with massive debt in a new country. Still, Hannah was fiercely protective of her son and his heart.
"Mum" said John, "are you alright?" noticing the look on her face.
"I'm perfectly fine John. I suppose I should be asking you the same question."
"Ah, you heard me and Fran."
"Yes. I must say I'm surprised. Things seemed to be going well with you two."
"I suppose they weren't going well at all."
"Any idiot could see John was barely interested in Anne" said Frances immediately after John spoke. "Do I even need to go into why Anne was with John? Why is it so surprising that they finally broke up?" said Frances nonchalantly.
John and Hannah both gave Frances a hard glare which made her retreat to her room. "What? I was only stating the obvious!" said Frances before she walked out the living room to her bedroom. John and Hannah loved Frances but knew that she could be inconsiderate of other's feelings at times.
When Frances left, John admitted that despite her abruptness, she was correct. With his mother he finally let down his guard. "Mum, while in an odd way, I'm glad that Anne and I broke up and I'm also scared as well. With Anne, there was some comfort in being in a relationship and the hope of something special even if that hope was unfounded. Now that I'm single again, I feel a certain amount of vulnerability. I'm 35 years old and I haven't met any woman, Anne included, who truly feels special to me. I sometimes wonder if no one will love me, no one will care for me except for you."
Going over to sit nearer her son, Hannah took his hands in hers and said "John, don't think that way. You are a worthy man and there is a worthy woman for you. Just live your life and she will come." said his mother. His mother's words soothed him as they so often did. He kissed her on the cheek and retired to bed.