As always, a big, big thank you to Ambush99 for her wonderful betaing skills.

Chapter 24

Sirius leant against the wall for a moment. It had been over a week since he had fully regained consciousness. He had been at the Potters' for over two weeks, but there was this burning question eating away at him. He moved and stood hesitantly at the door. He knew from his father, people didn't like to be disturbed when they were reading. A shiver cut through his body. He pulled the hoodie closer to his body and closed his eyes for a moment. He still felt so tired. It didn't matter how much he slept, he still woke up feeling tired. He slept most of the day as well. Well, he doubted he could call it a restful sleep. He knew the poison was no longer in his system, but he still couldn't do magic. It was only a matter of time before the Ministry turned up and obliviated his memories. He was a squib, but he had seen Hogwarts. He had seen the magical community, but he wasn't of age. They wouldn't want someone like him wandering around. There were some memories he would be only too glad to lose. But the memories of Hogwarts. The memories of the full moons. The memories of his holidays with James at the Potters'. He didn't want to lose them. Maybe Mr. Potter could work out a way he wouldn't have to lose all of his memories, that he could just go and live in the muggle world.

"Mr. Potter," he said softly.

Fleamont looked up from his work for a moment. It took him a moment to process the soft voice. "Sirius?" he said gently.

"I'm so sorry Mr. Potter, I'll go. I-I, I didn't mean to disturb you," Sirius replied quietly, with his head down as he stared at the floor.

"Sirius, come here," Fleamont said with a smile as he held out his hand. "You're not disturbing me. What's on your mind?"

"It can wait."

"No, it can't, not if it's making you this upset," Fleamont said gently, as he slowly walked towards the boy. He laid a hand on his shoulder. "Come on, let's sit by the fire."

"But Mr. Potter, you have your work."

"I do, but it can wait. Compared to you, it really doesn't matter. Why don't we talk about what's bothering you?" Fleamont said gently.

"I don't think I can," Sirius replied nervously, as tears stung his eyes. "I don't think I am strong enough."

"You are, Sirius," Fleamont replied firmly. "You don't have to tell me anything, but let's sit here. I just want you to feel okay. To feel safe. That's all Sirius."

"But there's," Sirius sniffed. He looked down again, slightly leaning into Fleamont's arm. "But even when the Ministry come."

Fleamont frowned. "Why would the Ministry come?"

"Because-because I'm a squib and they'll need to erase my memories."

"Sirius?" Fleamont questioned, feeling as confused as Sirius' line of conversation.

"I know too much. I'm underage. The Ministry wants to keep our world secret, and they won't want someone like me wandering around."

Fleamont wrapped his arm around Sirius' too thin shoulders. "Come on, let's sit down and talk about what all of this is about."

Sirius sniffed as he allowed himself to be guided to the sofa. He sank down and sat rigidly. He had only been in his father's office a handful of times, and there had never been a sofa. He had always been forced to sit on the hard chair, which forced the occupier to sit bolt upright as though they had been tied to an iron rod. "Again Mr. Potter, I'm so sorry. I know you're busy and I should have never disturbed you in your study."

"Sirius, you can come in here whenever you want."

"But Mr. Potter, it's your study."

Fleamont slowly nodded. He wished Sirius didn't feel the need to address him so formally. He had mentioned it to the boy on a couple of occasions, but Sirius had continued to address him formally. He didn't want to make Sirius any more uncomfortable, so he didn't bring it up anymore. "Sirius, I know it is. But." He paused and took a small breath. "I don't know what your father's study was like, but my study isn't formal. Yes, there will be times I cannot be disturbed if a client is with me, but that's rare. I meet the vast majority of my clients at my office in London. The rest of the time you are free to come in here. Sit. Talk to me. Ask questions. Sleep. Read books. Borrow books."

"But-"

"You are not disturbing me, Sirius. I was going through some boring papers, so you are a very welcome distraction," Fleamont said with a smile. He watched Sirius for a moment. The still too thin frame. The pale skin. The dark circles under his eyes. Sure, he looked better than he had a few days ago but then he had been at death's door, so it wasn't a great yardstick to measure against. "Why will the Ministry be coming?"

"Because I'm a squib and the Ministry wants our world to be secret."

"Why do you think you are a squib?"

"Because-because I can't do magic," Sirius burst out, as tears began to stream down his face.

"Oh Sirius," Fleamont replied, as he wrapped an arm around Sirius' shoulders and pulled him close. "What did the school tell you about your condition?"

"Nothing," Sirius sobbed. "Just, I, I don't know. Just I needed, I needed to go to class and get on with life."

"Okay," Fleamont replied tensely. He sighed, trying not to let his anger show. How could they have abandoned Sirius in his darkest of hours. Left with no information, just his scared mind, and imagination left to run wild. "Sirius, when you've been ill before I'm guessing you felt tired, it was hard to concentrate and your magic was a little off." He watched the boy nod before continuing. "And how many spells need a wrist movement?"

"I don't, maybe a lot," Sirius replied, looking down.

"Most," Fleamont replied, his arm never leaving Sirius' shoulders. "And those spells are going to be pretty hard when your wand arm is in a cast."

"I guess," Sirius replied hesitantly.

"How's your writing with your left hand going?"

"It's, I'm really trying Mr. Potter, I promise."

"I know," Fleamont replied, pulling Sirius closer. "But it's not as good as your right hand, and why should it be? What I'm saying Sirius is, right now the magic you will be able to perform will be limited. But you will get better."

"Mr. Potter, I promise you I'm trying."

"I know you are trying, Sirius. And you are doing really well."

"But-"

"Sirius, take my wand," Fleamont said, dropping his wand into Sirius' open palm.

"What? No! Why?" Sirius exclaimed, as he tried to back away.

"Take it, Sirius. You won't hurt me."

"But why?"

"Because I need to show you that you are still a wizard and a damn fine one."

"Mr. Potter, I can't," Sirius replied in a choked sob.

"You can. Right now, you might not be able to perform the magic you used to but, once you are well again and your wrist has healed, you will be back performing all the magic you did before, and more," Fleamont said determinedly.

"But-" Sirius started hesitantly as he looked down at the wand.

"Just try Lumos," Fleamont suggested with a smile.

Sirius stared down at the wand. He gripped it as tightly as the cast would allow and concentrated as hard as he could, willing the wand to cooperate. Since the whole incident, he had struggled with all magic. He had barely been able to perform the most basic lumos spell. He needed to show Mr. Potter he wasn't a complete idiot. Otherwise, why would Mr Potter want him to stay?

"LUMOS!" Sirius gasped and dropped the wand as the whole room was flooded with a

blinding, white light.

"Okay, okay," Fleamont said lightly, blinking several times as his eyes tried to adjust against the blinding light. "Okay, well I think we have established you can still do magic. Let's try that again, but try to relax."

"No," Sirius said, slightly backing up, holding his hands up. "No, I might do something dangerous. I might hurt you."

"No, you won't, Sirius," Fleamont replied with a smile, handing his wand over to the boy.

"This time, relax. Don't force it. You don't need to put as much energy into the Lumos spell. You can do this, Sirius; you have just proven it. You are a wizard, Sirius."

Sirius bit his lip as he looked nervously down at the wand. He could see his hand tremblingly. What was Mr. Potter doing?! He was dangerous. Maybe this was what happened when someone became a squib. Maybe it was the last pieces of magic leaving his body. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his mind. Slowly he felt a warm sensation running down his arm. He heard Mr. Potter clapping and encouraging him. Slowly he opened his eyes, to see a warm, glowing light at the end of the wand.

"What did I tell you, Sirius!" Fleamont said with a warm smile. "You are a wizard. You are brilliant. With non-verbal magic and a wand that isn't yours."

"I, I, how?" Sirius managed.

"There is one more thing I can think of. Can I have your wand?" Fleamont asked.

"Yes," Sirius replied nodding, as he handed over the school wand.

"Is this your original wand?" Fleamont asked, as he took the wand and carefully examined the dull, chipped piece of wood.

"No," Sirius replied, shaking his head. "It's a school wand. I had to, my parents, I don't have my original wand anymore."

Fleamont nodded his head sympathetically. "Lumos," he tried. He frowned when there was no response from the wand. "Lumos!" he tried again with more determination. Still nothing. Forcing himself to concentrate more than he should for a simple spell, he tried again. "Lumos!" Finally, there was dull, flicking light at the end of the wand.

"Well Sirius, I think I have now completely proven my theory. Given how ill you've been, and performing magic with your non-wand arm and with this 'wand', any magic you have managed is miraculous. To be frank Sirius, you might as well skip into the garden and snap a twig off one of the trees. It would probably be as much use as this, well, whatever it is. It's not a wand."

Sirius looked at Fleamont and then at the wand. "But I don't understand, why would the school give me a wand that doesn't work?"

"I don't know, Sirius. It's ridiculous and it's cruel. And I will be talking to the school about it."

Sirius sighed and let his shoulders fall. He closed his eyes for a moment. Why did nothing make any sense anymore? "Why? Why didn't they want me?" he said to no one in particular.

"Sirius?" Fleamont said, placing an arm around the boy's shoulders.

"Why did they want to deny there was a whole world out there? Why did they refuse to believe muggles were talented and could do stuff witches and wizards hadn't done?" Sirius continued. His eyes remained closed as he rested his head on Fleamont's chest.

"Muggles don't perform magic like we do, but they do perform magic. They call it something else, but how else could they have put themselves into space? How could they have walked on the moon if they didn't perform their own form of magic?"

"They are human beings like us. They are just using a different set of powers than we do," Fleamont replied simply.

"I know, but why didn't my parents, my family see this? I promise, I never set out to be difficult for them, but I just wanted to know why? I wanted to explore the muggle world, but my family told me muggles were dirty, that muggleborn witches and wizards were stealing magic, but it didn't make sense."

"What happened, Sirius?" Fleamont asked gently.

"If they are dirty, how could they have created something as beautiful as Concorde? It's faster than any broomstick and muggles can travel in comfort. I saw it in Paris when I was nine, and stupidly said it was magical. My cousin heard and told my parents. They were so angry," Sirius said, as he curled up. "They were so angry."

"What happened?"

"They used curses and then locked me in my room for a week. I couldn't help it, because Concorde was magical to me. It was beautiful. I just wanted to know more about it. But they never understood. They never wanted to understand. I knew then, I was different to them. I was an outcast, but I didn't understand why. I loved engines. Any type of engine. Cars. Motorbikes. But especially planes. I used to sneak out when my parents were at some sacred twenty-eight lunch party or something and go down to Heathrow to watch the planes. It was comforting. It felt free. They caught me once and-" Sirius stopped, and bit his lip, as he blinked back tears. "God, they were so angry I thought they were going to kill me. I don't remember much of that summer."

"How old were you?" Fleamont asked gently.

"Ten," Sirius replied simply.

"What about Hogwarts?"

"They thought it would finally sort me out, that I would see muggles for who they were or rather, what they thought they were. But then I was sorted into Gryffindor, and they lost it. I was so scared of going home that Christmas. It started as soon as I walked through that door. It was the first time they used the Cruciatus Curse on me. And then Bella would come over, talking about the Dark Lord, and showing my parents and cousins what she had learnt from him. It was all of this dark magic, and I was her test dummy."

Fleamont felt his heart break as Sirius continued telling his story in the same monotone voice. Sirius had just been an inquisitive, intelligent child, that's all. Fleamont knew the Blacks had a reputation for pure blood mania, but what Sirius told him was crazy. No child should have gone through what he had been through.

"That's what it was like, every holiday until either it was time to go back to Hogwarts or I came to stay with James. Sometimes they got bored and forgot about me." Sirius stopped and licked his lips for a moment. He felt drained. So tired. "At some point, I just couldn't take it anymore, so I started to fight back. And that …, that really angered them. Or maybe it didn't, maybe it was like a challenge to them, I don't know. Maybe if I had accepted their fuc'ed-up version of the world it would have stopped? But I couldn't, because it was wrong. Why would their lives be more valuable than muggles? It's a human life. There's no difference between their lives and a muggle's life. It's stupid. I hate them. I hate the lot of them."

"Sirius, can you tell me what happened this Christmas?"

"I don't, I don't know if I can," Sirius replied, tears now streaming uncontrollably down his cheeks.

"You don't have to if you don't want to. But it might help," Fleamont said gently, as he took Sirius' hand. "You are strong enough."

Sirius swallowed a couple of times before continuing. "I knew. I knew from ages ago that Christmas would be different. It was the last one before I came of age. I was their heir. I knew there were only two ways out of that house. Marked or dead. I was never going to take the mark, so I knew I was going to die that Christmas."

"When did you know this?!" Fleamont exclaimed.

"Last year," Sirius sighed tiredly.

"Sirius, why didn't you say something?"

"You know how powerful my family is. I didn't think anyone would believe me."

Fleamont nodded and sighed. He understood what Sirius was saying. The Blacks were very powerful and not many people would stand up to them. But he would have. However, that was the past. He couldn't correct the past, but he could change the future. "I would have."

Sirius looked down. His life was complicated. He wasn't accustomed to asking for help. A Black should never have to ask for help. He bit his lip again before continuing. "As soon as I walked through that door it started. They cursed me. They beat me. It went on for hours. They used the Cruciatus curse, they tried to control me with the Imperius curse, but I managed to fight it off. They tried these new curses Bella had learnt from Voldemort. And then they would lock me in my trunk and bury me alive. It went on for, I don't know. I lost track of time. But-but then. On-on Christmas Eve-" Sirius stopped, unable to continue. Tears streamed down his face. He could feel himself hyperventilating. He could feel himself losing control.

"It's okay Sirius, it's okay. Just breathe Sirius, just breathe," Fleamont said gently, as he held the sobbing boy close. Tears pricked his eyes as he thought of what the poor boy had endured. And it could have all been avoided if someone had just opened their eyes and looked at what was happening in front of them. "You are going to be okay Sirius, you will be. I will protect you and you will never go back to your parents."

"They broke me," Sirius sobbed.

"No, they didn't. They tried to, but you were too strong. What we are going to do is, we are going to London. We are going to buy you a wand. You aren't going to use this useless piece of wood for a moment longer. If you want to use a wand, you can use mine. We can go to muggle London if you want, and buy some books about planes, Concorde, engines, whatever you want. We can buy some posters to decorate your room. And then, when you are well enough, we can rent a car and drive to Heathrow to watch those planes. You can look at the car's engine as well. When you are old enough, I will teach you how to drive. But they did not break you. And I will not let the memories of it break you either."

Sirius felt his breathing slow as the sheer panic left him. He couldn't tell Mr. Potter the rest of the story, it was too painful, too frightening, but he knew he had to tell someone. He wondered how much time he would have. He wondered how much longer he would be safe, how long it would take before he was hunted down. But for now, he knew he was safe. "I would like that," he finally managed.

Fleamont nodded. There were still a number of pieces of the puzzle missing, but he had learned something. And more importantly, he had started to gain Sirius' trust. He had more than enough evidence to put half of the Black family in Azkaban, but that was up to Sirius. His job was to support and protect the boy. He thought back to the conversation he had had with Euphemia a couple of days ago.

"Darling, we need to talk," Euphemia started softly, as she rounded the kitchen table to face her husband.

"Yes?" Fleamont replied, not looking up from his newspaper.

"It's about Sirius."

That got his attention, as Fleamont looked up from his paper. "What about Sirius?"

"He needs to meet people."

"Darling, he's not ready. He can barely stay awake for more than a few hours! And now, you want him to go and meet and greet people! Euphemia, he can't! He needs more time!" Fleamont exclaimed, as he got up and started to pace around the kitchen.

"Fleamont!"

"What?!"

"I am not talking about that, and you know it. But he needs to know there are people outside of these walls that support him. That love him. I know we won't be able to invite Remus and Pete over during the school term. But we could bring James over. I know how much James would love that. I know James needs it. And I think Sirius needs it."

"Maybe," Fleamont said quietly.

"Fleamont, I know you want to protect him from the world. So do I. But Sirius knows there is a world out there, and he will go back to it."

"He's not ready!" Fleamont bit back.

"Darling, I'm just talking about James. His best friend! And maybe there are other people. I want to protect him just as much as you do. We need to support him."

Fleamont nodded slowly, knowing his wife was right. "Okay," he said slowly.

"Sirius," Fleamont said quietly. "I was just wondering if you wanted to see James."

"I, I don't know. I don't think I would be a lot of fun. I'll probably just fall asleep," Sirius replied, looking down.

"I don't think James would care. You've seen the letters he's written to you. He wants to see you and make sure you are okay with his own eyes. And, I reckon, you want to see him as well. I'm guessing it's a little boring with just me and Euphemia," Fleamont said gently, with a smile.

"Yeah, I guess," Sirius replied with a slight smile.

"I probably can't get Remus and Pete out during term time."

"I guess that would be complicated," Sirius said with a shrug.

Fleamont nodded. "I could try if you want."

"No," Sirius replied, shaking his head. "I won't be great company anyway. Plus, I am sure James has enough to say for all four of us."

Fleamont smiled. "Yes, I am sure he does. Is there anyone else?" he asked carefully.

"Why?"

"I just want you to know that there are more people out there who support you. It's not just me, Euphemia and James." Fleamont watched as Sirius shook his head. "No one? Are you sure? No family member?"

"No!" Sirius snapped. "Please don't tell them. Please don't let me go back!"

"I won't, Sirius, I promise I won't. I am not talking about your parents. Is there anyone else? I am not trying to offload you on someone else. You can stay here as long as you want. Wherever I live Sirius, there will always be a home for you. I just want you to feel as supported as you need to," Fleamont explained gently, as he took Sirius' hand.

"There's, there's my Uncle Alphard," Sirius said in a near whisper.

"Alphard Black? The archaeologist?"

Sirius nodded. "I don't see him a lot. He travels a lot, but he's always been good to me."

"He's the reason you love Ancient Runes?"

"Yeah. He's different to the rest of them. He was always the one I could talk to about stuff. He laughed about muggle stuff, but not in a harsh way," Sirius said, finding a small smile as he thought back.

"Do you want me to contact him?"

"I don't know. I don't want him to be put in a difficult position."

"Okay, shall we think about it? We don't need to do anything about it. You are always welcome in my home. You are like a son to me. And all I want in the world is for you to be happy. To feel safe. To be healthy. If there was a spell to make all of this happen, I would do it in a heartbeat."

"But you can't and that's okay." Sirius stopped and took a breath. "I know I can't go back to my parents. I don't want Uncle Alfie or Andy to be caught up in all of this."

Fleamont frowned. "Andy?"

"She's my cousin. But she was blasted off the tapestry."

"Tapestry?"

"There's a tapestry in 12 Grimmauld Place. The Black family tree is on it. When a family member does something that's seen to be against the family, they are blasted off it."

"Against the family?"

"Andy married a muggleborn wizard. Alfie knows how to play his cards, that's the only reason he hasn't been blasted off it. Marius, I think he was a great uncle or something, anyway he was blasted off because he was a squib. And me. I think I will be blasted off and I don't care! I don't want anything to do with them. I just don't want my shadow, my darkness to affect Andy and Alfie, or Regulus. Andy got away. Alfie can come and go as he pleases. But Regulus can't."

"Is Regulus safe?"

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, I reckon so. Just as long as he's not in my shadow."

"If there is anything you want me to do," Fleamont started. "Anything at all. All you need to do is ask."

"I know," Sirius replied smiling. "I know."