Chapter 4: Of Happy Accidents and Unfortunate Tides

A/N: Hey... it's been a minute guys. no real excuse for the obscene time between posts other than my mental tanked harder than cryptocurrency. anywhosers, Welcome back to this trainwreck of thought that I'm brute forcing into something readable and hopefully coherent. Also, I had someone PM me asking the Whereabouts of Sierra. I think I addressed this earlier but to be safe I'll address it here. We're still good friends, but life happens and moves happen too. She still yells at me to keep things going but is focusing primarily on her career. So unless I really Screw up somewhere you won't see notes from her. She still assists where she can and I will credit her for when she does if it goes directly into the writing. That answer that Random Unnamed Reader? Anyways, not too much more to say other than let's get into the meat of the chapter now. For copyright, I don't own the KH franchise, Square Enix, or any of Disney's stuff. Onto the show!!!

After my conversation with the local magic man, I had spent the next few days going through remiedal magic and combat lessons; Courteously set up by said Magic man And Leon. All of it in an effort to get me up to snuff in their eyes. Or at least be less likely to horribly injure myself with my prior style of fighting. While I'm not an expert now, at least I know how to actually... well fight.

(Flashback to training!)

After that talk with Merlin, and my subsequent breakdown; I grabbed both Merlin and Leon and headed out front of the wizards house. After clearing out a few shadows that had snuck their way this deep into town, we stood roughly equal distance from one another.

"So. Merlin tells me you wanted to get some extra training in before you head out to search, is that right?" Leon asked, his Gunblade casually resting over his shoulder.

"Y-yeah. I've been... informed that my style of fighting is too 'reckless' and 'wasteful'" I responded with air quotes while looking at Merlin who merely smiled back at me. Cheeky old Bastard that one is.

"Well. You're primarily a mage, right? Why don't you work with Merlin first and show him what you got." Leon said before stepping off to the side towards the front of the house. Merlin simply Summoned his wand with a *Poof* and nodded to me lightly. My blade appeared in its usual dark flash, the handle resting comfortably in my hand once more.

"I want to test your spell casting, so I want you to hit me with as many spells as you can, does that sound alright my dear?" The wizard said as he still looked the epitome of relaxed.

"Are... you sure? I don't want to hurt you.." I told him, the last thing I want is to accidentally injure someone I actually kinda like.

"Of course! I can handle any spells you throw my way! I'm no slouch myself after all." He said as he merely held his wand out in front of him, still relaxed. Does... he think I can't even be a threat? Oh hell no. With a growl and a pulse of Mana through my weapon, I lifted it high and cast what I know now to be Thundera.. which splashed harmlessly against a simple Reflect spell. Squaring my shoulders, I soundlessly cast a trio of Firas which met the same date as my Thundera spell. This unfortunate Cycle carried on for about 5 minutes until my mana ran dry, leaving me a panting, sweaty mess.

"Hmmm.. it seems you let your emotions get the better of you when you cast" He told me before continuing "This is a problem, can you tell me why?" Shit that's a good question

"Makes me prone to mistakes?" I answered him, not very confidently but it's an answer at least.

"While true, it makes you lose focus, losing that makes the spell weaker and even makes you put far more Mana into a spell than is needed. This is why, despite your rather sizeable reserves, you're already out of Mana and exhausted. I will be helping you fix that and I Must warn you. It will not be a pleasant experience." Merlin said ominously, well, as ominously as he could at least. I find it hard to take him seriously sometimes, he's just so... nice. My thoughts aside, he stepped back and Leon stepped up to replace him. No words were spoken as he held his blade in front of him in a weak guard. I guess I just.. go then? Never really seen him fight much, maybe I'll get lucky and win?

(To the present!)

Yeah... win I did not. Leon absolutely demolished me and did so without saying anything until after he was done turning me into paste. According to the Near-Silent man, I am far too aggressive on the attack and take too many hits to hit back harder. And... he isn't wrong. I mean, who realistically expects someone to just take a hit just to ensure a harder one is thrown back? I told him this and his answer surprised me a bit

(Back we go again!)

"-while that might work against, say, other people. Especially in a One on One. However, Against the Heartless and Nobodies where you are almost always outnumbered? It's a definite way to find yourself hurt or even worse with little to show for it. It seems your entire way of fighting is self-destructive. I can see why you asked for training." Leon told me before settling back into his combat stance.

(Present once more!)

Over those few days, I had my ass handed to me and burned through enough Mana in such a short to nearly hurt myself in the process. Merlin surprisingly enough being one hell of a Slave-driver when it comes to training.Thankfully getting my shit kicked in actually helped more than it sucked for once. While no grand mage, I can actually cast more than I used to from less overcharging spells. And fighting Leon more or less forced me to be defensive and, well, fight like a mage should. From a distance, preferably bombarding the enemy with spells until they stop being an issue. Hopefully the work put in over the past... week and a half or so sticks but I suppose I'll see once I'm off galavanting across the cosmos.

"Munny for your thoughts?" a voice called out from nearby, breaking me out of my thoughts as I looked to my right; just to find Yuffie standing on the raised concrete next to where I was sitting. '

"Maybe if I don't tell her anything she'll go away?" I thought quietly to myself as I kept staring out over the rooftops by Merlin's place. Unfortunately, she took my lack of response as a yes and plopped down right next to me.

"So what's gotcha all moody broody Hmmm?" The ever hyper ninja asked me as she nudged me with her elbow. Letting out a short, if quiet sigh, I turned away from the rather nice view to answer her.

"If you really want to know, I'm.. worried. For my family, my friends, even myself." I told her evenly. Which earned me a rather unexpected response from her; A simple nod. No shout or anything about how it all be fine, just a small nod.

"I get it. I know exactly what that feels like, at least the worrying for others part. When Hollow Bastion fell a long time ago, all I did was worry." She told me, to which I gave her the strangest look. It only served to make her laugh "I know! Me? Worry? I know I'm a bit energetic but.. that worry was always there, heck it still IS there. I can't help be worry about my friends every time we go to clear out Heartless or Nobodies. Although.. I don't understand what you meant about worrying for yourself."

"I... As I am sure you're aware, I'm Very heavily attuned to the Dark, Yuffie." I started off to her, continuing before she could cut me off, "So much so that even a single bad day or singular bad event could be catastrophic for me. I try not to think about it but at the same time.. I'm about to embark on a journey with an ending I have zero idea how it could play out. I don't even know where to begin!" I shouted out toward the blue sky, maybe it would give me an answer. For once, the hyperactive ninja was silent as I clamped down on my emotions once more with a handful of deep breaths.

"I forget where I heard this" Yuffie said quietly, "But every journey starts with a single step. So maybe the best way to start is to just throw yourself at it?" She finished, leaning back to look at the sky. Really? A single step? Could it really be that simple? I nodded slowly to Yuffie before standing up, my legs protesting at the movement from sitting so long.

"Thank you, Yuffie. I'll keep that in mind. I suppose it's time for me to get going then. I won't find any answers or the people I'm looking for just sitting here, will I?" And with that said, I turned to take that first step, and immediately fell on my ass as my legs were most definitely asleep. I could hear Yuffie laughing like an idiot behind me and just threatened bloody retribution for her betrayal. It was not as effective as I would have liked. To be honest though, I don't mind that for once..

Hours later under a setting sun, I made my final checks to the ship. really should give her a name but I'm sure it'll come to me in time. After deeming the ship good to go and checking the manifest sticky taped to the door courtesy of the ducking trio; who by the way cut me one hell of a deal, I felt ready as I would ever be.

"Don't worry guys, I'm on my way. I'll find you and make things right" I thought to myself as I boarded the ship and flew off into the void to find the people I care for. Even with all the bad, all the shit I got put through, I still care for my dad, Rose and the people of my world.

Journal entry 0009: A single step turns to a second. Let's do this. End of Journal entry.