Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all.
Rated M for a reason. Bitter Lemon
Chpt 35 The Forlorn Hope
BPOV
The rain didn't stop for over 24 hours, I know because we were frozen in place the whole time. It is only when weak sunlight begins to filter through the grey clouds that we stir.
The lead weight in my chest now has a name. Grief.
And the only reason I can still function, if only slightly, is holding me tightly in his arms.
"I need you." He whispers, breaking the silence.
I shiver, understanding his need. It's not lust exactly, more a need to be connected, together, to feel an' perhaps temporarily forget. Or maybe it's just desperation.
I lift my hands to his face, cupping it an' rubbing my thumbs lightly across his lips. He captures one lightly between his teeth as he pushes me gently down onto my back, covering my body with his own.
Staring deeply into my eyes he releases my thumb an' slowly unbuttons my soaking wet shirt, sliding it down my arms until I am able to wriggle them free.
Softly an' slowly he plants kisses along my left shoulder, setting me trembling as his mouth ghosts onto my throat an' up to my lips. He pulls back slightly to look into my eyes again before lowering his mouth to mine. Our lips move gently together in a slow rhythm which builds lazily as I twine my fingers into his hair. His tongue licks across my lower lip and then plunges into my mouth drawing a gasp from me, causing my abdomen to tighten an' my body to arch against him.
He groans into me and deepens the kiss tugging a response from my core around the obstruction in my chest. I kiss him back with everything I have until it feels like we're drowning in each other.
Breathing roughly he breaks away from me abruptly transferring his mouth to one hard nipple, rolling his tongue around it through the fabric of my bra while his thumb circles the other.
"Jasper." I breathe, tugging at his hair.
He pulls away completely, rapidly shedding his clothes while I remove my jeans.
He's on me again instantly, his mouth encircling my other nipple as his hand slides down my body an' rubs gently between my legs, his fingers ghosting over me through the flimsy fabric of my panties. I push up into his hand, seeking more friction for my aching clit. With a flick of his wrist he rips the panties away trailing his finger lightly along my wet flesh setting me trembling again.
As he continues to tease me he kisses his way back up my body, pausing to lavish attention on my neck before capturing my mouth in another passionate kiss, darting his tongue between my lips at the same time as his teasing finger slips inside me.
The tempo of our kiss increases as he begins to gently stroke my sensitive flesh with his thumb. As tingling warmth begins to spread through me he slides another finger inside me pumping them in time with his slowly circling thumb.
Unable to restrain myself I writhe an' moan beneath him, groaning in response he removes his fingers and pushes his cock slowly inside me, thumb still massaging my clit.
We break our kiss, eyes locked as we both drawing shuddering breaths at the feel of him easing his way into me, finally filling an' stretching me completely.
He stills, looking down at me his expression almost desperate.
"I love you." He whispers, closing his eyes and beginning to move slowly inside me, thumb rubbing gently again at my sensitive nub.
I watch his face unable to look away as he moves over me, in me, on me. The tingling warmth builds rapidly, moving further out across my body each time he rocks into me and within minutes I am writhing and moaning again all my nerves endings burning, ready to catch fire.
I bite down on my lip to keep from crying out as the pace of his movements gradually increases an' my hands slide down to the small of his back fingers splaying out over his tensing an' releasing muscles.
My orgasm is a slow burn, muscles tightening, lifting my back from the rock an' allowing him to push deeper inside me as fire races through me. As my limbs begin to shake his eyes snap open, boring into mine.
My walls clamp down around him, pulling him deeper an' he moans as his cock swells an' twitches inside me.
Eyes locked he thrusts into me in earnest, increasing the pressure of his thumb he drives me, gasping, over the edge as he cums inside me with a long drawn out groan.
Still moving gently within me he collapses onto his elbows resting his forehead on my shoulder as our bodies undulate together with aftershocks.
When our breathing returns to normal he pulls out of me rolling our bodies to face each other, arms an' legs tangled together.
I reach out with my hand and tenderly brush the wet blonde hair from his face. He captures my hand in his, pressing a kiss onto my palm and then closes his eyes with a soft sigh. I snuggle closer into him an' close my own eyes.
Hours later, in darkness, we stir again.
"We can't stay here forever." He says quietly.
I nod, not trusting my voice. I have no idea where we go, or what we do from here. I had expected to feel a white hot rush of rage, a savage desire for revenge, but I don't, I just feel numb.
We lapse back into silence, just a little more animated than we were before.
"What if they're not dead?" I ask eventually.
"Then The Volturi have them." He sighs hopelessly.
We know who the unidentified vampire scents belong to, or at least we think we do, because Edward was with them.
"If Aro touched one of them, wouldn't he know the truth?" Gus has explained Aro's gift to us. Its similar to Edward's but he needs physical contact, once he has it everything in your head, thoughts or memory, is played back like a video.
"Maybe. We don't know if he was even there, I don't know his scent. And they don't very often give you a chance to explain yourself, summary justice."
"Harry told me Aro either wants Gus dead or back in Volterra. He could use her as leverage against Gus now."
"Yeah. But why would he want the others?" He swallows, voice dropping to barely a whisper. "Why would they keep Pete an' Char alive? An' if by some miracle they have, how the fuck are we gonna get 'em back?"
"We can't just . . . . without knowin' . . . . I couldn't." I struggle to form the words, the huge weight is crushing my chest an' closing my throat.
"I know." He hugs me harder.
Rutilio seems unimportant now. Oh, I still hate him, I have even more crimes to lie at his feet but the past hurts far less than the present. I can't believe they're gone, just can't get my head around the concept.
The truth is, we never really expected to have to go up against The Volturi, our plan was all about catching Rutilio an' proving his guilt. Seeking out the Italians on our own terms. The Major may be a boxers over the pants type of vampire an' I'm no slouch either but The Volturi? Even thinking about going after them feels like a conscious act of suicide.
I can't let anything happen to Jasper, I have to protect him. We've moved all our money, The Major's supposed to be dead anyway, I can mask our scents. We could just keep running.
No, we can't. Not until we know what happened to Pete an' Char, even if we die trying to find out.
Jasper sighs heavily against my face an' I know without asking that he's been having the same thoughts.
"I'm so sorry." He whispers sounding as desolate as I feel.
"We're a family Jasper." I reassure him, taking his face in my hands. "We couldn't live with ourselves if we didn't at least try, it's who we are, who you made us."
The sadness in his grateful smile wrenches at the dead weight in my chest. I've lost my family an' now I'm gonna lose my mate and my life.
It's so fuckin' unfair.
A/N The chapter title, The Forlorn Hope is a term from the Napoleonic Wars. Officers who wanted a quick promotion on the battlefield would volunteer to command a forlorn hope, a company of men sent in at the start if a battle to do something stupidly dangerous. If you survived, you got promoted. I don't think the ordinary soldiers got a choice, nice huh?