Writers Note: Thanks for all the kind words everybody! Im will amazed at the support this story is getting! Please feel free to also give your concerns about anything that doesnt make sense to you! Enjoy the chapter!
Chapter 8 - Keep Holding On
Mood: "Cause you know we'll make it through, just stay strong"
It was silent for a moment, maybe 10 minutes, before Renee snapped back to reality and realized what Jack had just told her. She shivered at the thought of all three of them on the loose. The feelings that went through Renee were too much for words. There was fear, there was pain, there was...hate. Hate against the universe for constantly putting her loved ones in danger. Would they ever be able to just be a normal family?
"He is?" she finally croaked.
"Yes. Renee, listen. If he's out that means Wilson is working with them, which also means Tony is too." Jack explained.
Renee walked away from him and began to pace. "What does this have to do with me?"
Jack hesitated. "When the Russians ordered the hit on you, I went on a rampage. I made anyone and everyone pay for what they did to you. I had a clear shot on Sovervo."
Renee went back to the scariest moment in her life. The day she was almost killed. She thought back to the stories she heard from Jack and from others but never heard about what happened after she was hit.
"Jack" she whispered. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Jack looked down, unsure of his reasons himself. "Because I was ashamed." he admitted. "I let my anger get the best of my better judgment. I was just furious when the nurses told me you probably wouldn't make it."
Renee was crashed as Jack looked at her, his sad eyes ripped right through her. As she looked into Jack's eyes, she felt the pain he did. She could feel his shame, and fear and it killed her. She loved him, and there was nothing he could do that could ever change that, but there was still something that she saw in his eyes that confused her.
"Wait, how is he back if you shot him?"
Jack stuttered. "I didn't"
"You did all that and let the lead guy go?" Renee said, confused.
She knew Jack was not the type to quit at something. It was not his nature...
"I knew you wouldn't want me to start a war in your name." he's eyes fell to the floor as Renee walked closer.
Suddenly it made sense. She knew she was still missing part of the puzzle, but he told her the answers she needed. She could feel how hard it was for him to tell her this, and didn't want to pry, but she couldn't help it.
"What does this all mean, Jack?" She asked.
Jack sighed and lifted his head to meet Renee's worried gaze. "I have to go after Tony."
"What? Jack, no! Your job is to clear things up with Chloe in San Francisco, not to go out in the field across the country!" Renee cried.
Dammit! No! Not again!
They were just starting to put their lives back together. She felt he wasn't fit to go into the field, and if she thought what was happening in her body was happening, he couldn't leave her now.
Jack gently placed his hand on her shoulders. "Renee," he whispered. "I have to do this. Once things become personal, there's no way I can turn back. You know that." He said, sweetly.
"But, Jack..."
She didn't want him to go. She needed him here. As much as she hated to beg, she knew it was something she had to try to do.
"Listen. These people can come after any of you if I don't go all in. Lucy can be put in danger. You know my family is always the first target."
This confused her.
What does Lucy have to do with any of this?
"Lucy has nothing to do with this, Jack" Renee stated.
Jack was confused as to why Renee was being so stubborn when she knew exactly how urgent this situation was. "Really?" he snorted "With a past like hers, it has everything to do with her."
"What are you talking about?" Renee asked, scared of what he was saying. She was a trained agent, she knew what he was talking about, but she didn't want to admit it. For the first time in a long time, things were almost perfect.
"They could bring anyone into this, to make it personal."
"If you're talking about Charles, he's locked up in a mental institute. He can't get out." Renee said, angrily. There was no reason to worry, or so she thought
"Renee" he said sweetly. "I'm not the only one who has connections. They can find out about her history with him and use him. Renee, you have to understand. I have to do this alone."
"Dammit Jack!" she croaked, letting her head fall into his chest as he cradled her like a baby. "You can get killed. You're not as fit as you used to be, Jack. Hell! You're retired!" she cried. There was a reason why he retired. They were done, they were out. She knew it was worthless to argue, after all, Jack was just as stubborn as she was.
Jack creased the corner of his lip up. "Are you calling me old?"
"Jack, I'm serious." she murmured, but couldn't help let out a small chuckle.
Renee looked up to meet Jack's loving gaze. As she looked into his eyes she could see nothing but love, and it made her heart stop. "Be careful, Jack." she murmured.
"Don't you worry about me. I'm Superman, remember?" he chuckled.
"Dammit, Bauer I'm serious!" Renee cried.
Jack grabbed her sobbing body and rubbed her back. "I'll be fine."
As much as she wanted to trust Jack, she couldn't. It hurt her to say it, but he was cursed. Just when things seem to be going well, something ruins it. All she could do was look into the eyes of the man she loved and pray to God that all this would work out okay.
Now all she had left to do was tell him her suspicion as to why she was throwing up recently.
I looked out the back window of the hummer, thinking about God knows what. Jack's plane was scheduled to leave at 4 pm. I watched as little Teri said her last goodbye to Jack and walked out the door, not knowing when she would see him again, if she ever saw him again. With the missions Jack goes on, it's impossible to know if you will ever see him again. I prayed to God I would. Kim left with Teri the second we got to the airport. She cried that she couldn't watch her dad put his life on the line again and didn't want Teri exposed to that kind of pain either.
Jack cleared customs, and Renee, Mackenzie and I sat with him in the waiting area. Usually, you're not allowed in if you're not a passenger of the plane, but in these situations, it's allowed.
My thoughts were interrupted when the PA intercom made an announcement. "Flights to Washington DC are boarding now. Please have your boarding passes and photo ID out and ready for security."
I got up to go get Renee, who had excused herself to go to the restroom earlier, when Jack grabbed my arm.
"Lucy, honey, I need you to do me a favour" Jacked looked into my eyes.
"What is it Jack?" I asked, "If you don't hurry you'll miss your flight"
"I know honey. I just need you to do something for me." he said.
"What?"
"Watch over Renee."
"Wait, what?"
"I know she hates to see me do this and I hate to leave you both, just please make sure she doesn't do anything. Reckless."
"Renee's a big girl, Jack. Shouldn't it be the other way around?" I asked, confused.
Jack chuckled. "Yea...but Renee is...different. There are things about her you still don't understand. Once her mind is made up, it's almost impossible to change it. She's going to be upset, I've seen it before. I just want you to look out for her."
"In case she comes after you?" I filled in.
"Precisely"
"I'm on the job!" I said, hip checking him and spinning around to see Renee walking back.
Jack laughed and looked up to see Renee walking toward us.
"Hey gorgeous" he greeted.
I could see that Renee's eyes were red and ran over to wrap my arms around her.
"You ok?" I asked "I'm fine, Lucy and Hi, Jack" she responded.
"Hey Lucy, can you give me and Renee a second alone honey?"
"Yeah, sure," I said and walked back to sit beside Mackenzie.
Jack waited until Lucy was out of earshot before he spoke"I can see the gears turning in your head, what are you thinking?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Renee asked, crossed.
Jack chuckled. "Lucy needs you more than I do at the moment. I can't take the risk of anything happening to you two...especially…" Jack placed a hand on her stomach "…since there may be something that needs to be kept out of harm's way." He kissed her on the cheek and whispered in her ear. "I love you, and I know what you're hiding."
Renee hadn't paid attention to anything Jack was saying until she felt his hand on her stomach. "How did you know?"
"I've been through this before...with Teri. I know what the signs are"
"I haven't even shown signs yet!" she complained. The reason she hadn't told Jack was because she wanted his mind to be clear on this mission. She didn't want him worrying.
Jack laughed. "Yes you have, trust me. And I know you don't want me to worry, but I always will, I love you guys too much not to worry."
"Jack..." she whispered, trying to inhale her tears but couldn't help crying.
He brought her into a hug. "It's ok honey. Don't worry. I promise, I'm going to come back fine. After all...This little guy might need me one day" He smiled.
"What makes you so sure it's going to be a little guy, hmm?" Renee teased.
"Bauer's intuition"
"Everything ok?" I interrupted.
Jack tugged me and brought me into a playful hug along with Renee, relishing in the moments he had with us.
"Everything's just fine" he murmured.
"Last call for passengers going to Washington," the intercom went off again.
Jack pulled away slowly and looked at us "I better go. Take care of each other. I'll call when I land. I love you Lucy." he said, turning to look into Renee's eyes. "I love you Renee."
Mackenzie ran over to join into the farewell. "Bye- Bye Jack" she said, putting her hands up in every toddler's 'pick me up' motion. "Love you too, Jack" Renee and I answered at the same time, and turned to look at each other, giggling away.
Jack picked Mackenzie up and swung her around, planting a kiss on her cheek. "Love you little one" He said, as Mackenzie wrap her tiny arms around his neck.
"I love you too." she said, kissing his nose.
Jack wrinkled his face and placed Mackenzie back on the ground, drifting his gaze to both of us
"… and I love you both too. I'll be home as soon as I can" He promised, kissing both me and Renee on the head before heading for the gate.
I looked up at Renee whose face was wet from her sobs. I gave her a side hug and watched as Jack showed his boarding passes, and walked onto the gate.
"We should go home now." I said
Renee sniffled and hugged me back. "Yeah, let's go."
We walked towards the door when Renee abruptly stopped and clutched the abdominal part of her stomach.
"Oh…" she moaned.
Writers Note: Hmmmm... See you all in the next chapter! :)