This is something that randomly popped in to my head. Mrs. Benson is insane so i wondered how hard it would be to get her to let Freddie learn how to drive.
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iLearn to Drive
"Freddiebear, you're 16, don't you think it's time to start driving." my mom said one evening when we were eating dinner. (spinach and chicken, both of which she cut into tiny pieces for me). I looked at my mom like she was insane.
"Are you feeling alright mom?" I asked concerned.
"Of course honey. Are you okay, do you need a tick bath? Some more ointment?"
"No mom I'm fine. Just why all of a sudden do you think I should learn how to drive, when you won't even let me cut my own chicken?" I asked, my mouth open in shock. I didn't expect to learn how to drive until I turned thirty.
"Because you need to learn, and I need to teach you before you go away to college." She said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "We'll start tomorrow."
"OK." I said, going into my room to text Carly and Sam.
guess what my mom is teaching me how 2 drive
that's gr8 freddie
crazy let her little freddiekins drive?
insane right
totally
never expected ur mom to do that benson
me 2
When I woke up the next morning I was surprised to find my mom holding a bulletproof vest, and a helmet. Oh no. This cannot be good.
"What is that?" I asked with extreme caution. Honestly I was afraid to know the answer.
"Why it's what you'll be wearing when I teach you how to drive. I read in the 239th issue of Aggressive Parenting that you have to be extra precautionary when your child learns how to drive. So I went to the police station just for you and asked for a bulletproof vest. They thought I was crazy but safety isn't crazy. I am also going to get your armpads, kneepads, and fingerpads out of my first aid suitcase." Okay then.
"Mom how am I going to learn how to drive while wearing fingerpads?" I asked
"They'll give you extra grip on the steering wheel." She said. When she taught me how to ride my bike, I had to wear my winter coat and jeans IN THE SUMMER 'to reduce scrapes' along with my helmet armpads, kneepads, and fingerpads. It was 100 degrees outside too. I knew that learning how to drive was too good to be true. Now it's just going to be insanity at its finest.
"Now go put the bulletproof vest on, I'll find the armpads, kneepads, and fingerpads, and put the first aid suitcase in the car." She said.
Well there's no point in arguing, I thought as I put the vest on and took the elevator down to the lobby. "No teenagers in my lobby" Lewbert screamed as I ran out of the apartments.
My mom was waiting for me next to the car.
"Freddiekins, I just checked my mail, and it says here in this issue of Aggressive Parenting that it's not safe to teach your little boy how to drive until he is 17, I'm sorry but we will just have to wait until it is safe." She said. "How could I have been so silly to think you were ready when you obviously weren't? I'm so sorry Fredward, I'm going to make prune pops just for you. How would you like that Freddie?"
"Mom, I'm 16 not 6, I'm going to go get changed and go over to Carly's." I said in annoyance.
"Ok, I'll have them ready when you get home." She said.
"Ok mom, but I don't really want a prune pop." I said, disgusted.
"Why not?" She asked, hurt.
"Because Sam, who eats everything doesn't eat prune pops." I said walking into the lobby waving at my mom, and going over to Carly's, ready to tell her and Sam all about my adventures (not) driving. All I know is when I turn 17, things are going to be insane.