III.

Hawke came around the next day around evening when my influx of patients had reached a standstill. He was staring at me with an unreadable expression, as if he was trying to decide an opinion on me. I wanted to scoff. I'm not some sort of puzzle to be figured out! I crossed my arms and glared at him, as if the small action would guarantee him an early grave. "What is it now?" I asked impatiently.

"You forgot to give me the maps," he said gently, leaning against the doorframe.

"I—Ermm, I'm sorry about that. I forgot," I muttered, shuffling over to a small chest that possessed the minimal belongings I would never give up under normal circumstances. I yanked out the rolled up Warden maps and tossed them at the man, who caught it with ease. I continued on with what I was doing, reorganizing my herbs and ingredients, scrubbing my examination table… My eyes glanced towards the door to see him still lingering there. Still with that unreadable expression. "What in Andraste's name do you want?" I hissed out.

"What was that last night? You glowed like a… I don't know!" I remained silent, concentrating on scrubbing a blood stain off the table. Noting I wasn't say anything and was determined not to, he stammered on, "Is this the part where you tell me you're an abomination?" I glanced at him once more; his eyes had widened slightly as if he was in disbelief.

I sighed, staring back at the large rusty red smudge that refused to budge. "You're wrong, but… Not far wrong. This is hard to explain," I eventually said, tossing the cloth away in defeat and instead turning my attention to him. If he had stayed here for so long and still looked as if he wasn't going to budge—well, in short, I'm sure he wasn't going to budge without at least a few answers to his questions.

"You're telling me," he murmured sarcastically.

What was up with this man? I tried to be completely serious and give him an answer and he always found the need to be funny or sarcastic or just plain not serious! It was irritating. As much as he got on my nerves though, I suppose he deserved the truth. Plus, I'm sure he or his guardswoman friend would be very willing to tip a couple hints towards the Templars if I didn't provide them some explanation. And we don't want that, Justice hastily added in. Of course, Justice, of course. I attempted to figure out a way to explain my situation without mentioning Justice, but that was rather impossible, wasn't it? I finally resolved to tell the man about the spirit. "When I was in Amarathine, I met a spirit of Justice who was trapped outside the Fade. We became friends. And he recognized the injustice that mages in Thedas faced every day."

"So I wasn't so far off with that 'abomination' theory?" he said, raising an eyebrow.

I rolled my eyes. Could we interrupt me more than he already often did? "To live outside the Fade, he needed a host. I offered to help him. We were going to work together. Bring justice to every child ripped away from his mother to be sent to the Circle. But I guess I had too much anger. Once he was inside me… he changed."

The man's eyes seemed to flicker up and down, as if looking at me head to toe would allow him to see Justice. "So he's a demon now?" he asked me.

"No," I reassured him, but at this point in time, I'm sure I was only reassuring myself, "he is a spirit whose only purpose is to see an innocent saved and the guilty punished. But there was just too much hatred in me. Justice thought he could overcome it, but it only corrupted him. He is no longer my friend Justice, he is a force of vengeance, and he has no grasp of mercy."

Hawke remained silent, instead boyishly twisting a clump of his messy black hair around his finger, contemplating on what to say. He slowly pushed himself off the doorframe and walked inside my clinic, making a loop around the room, stopping to observe every detail of it. I watched him carefully, making sure he did not attempt to steal any of my items. "So," he mumbled while he picked up a vial containing a lyrium potion. "You and Karl were…?"

This man was starting to give me a headache.

"Good friends," I replied shortly.

"Didn't seem like that."

"I always believe people fall in love with a whole person, not the body."

"I wasn't judging you."

I remained silent, my eyes skimming over him. "Well, why'd you bring the topic off?" I asked curiously.

Hawke placed the vial down and turned towards me. He scratched his beard and grinned. "Oh, I don't know. I was just thinking about it. I'm sure people can't resist that," he paused, his green eyes seeming to twinkle just the slightest, "sexy tortured look you have going about you."

I could feel my cheeks flush red as I swiftly turned away from him, letting out an awkward cough. Did that really just come out? "P-Perhaps… I should check a looking glass more often," I awkwardly muttered under my breath.

I could hear him shift his weight from foot to foot. "Did I say something wrong? I mean, I was so sure I pulled that off rather well. Perhaps I'm getting a tad bit rusty, eh?" he said, finding it necessary to add a humorous tone.

Recomposing myself, I slowly turned my head back to him. "The timing was horrible. Just… Please leave, if that's okay with you. You got your maps and I think that's all you needed. So just… Run along now."

His gaze lingered on me. He opened his mouth but quickly closed it and shook his head instead. "I— Alright," he said shortly, hesitantly walking towards the exit. I got up and followed behind him. As he exited the doorway though, he paused and turned towards me. "Look, if you ever need some fresh air, you can find me or my dwarf friend Varric at the Hanged Man, over in Lowtown."

"I know where Lowtown is."

"Well, just in case. One can never be too sure."

"It's okay though, if I ever need fresh air, I'll just walk outside."

His jaw jutted out slightly and he furrowed his eyebrows. "Well, if you— Can I visit you again?"

"Fine," I hastily breathed out. "Just, please, leave me alone for now. I have things I need to do." Before giving him a chance to say anything, I forcefully added in a, "Thank you for visiting." I could hear the tinge of Justice in my voice. My hands found the thin metal I considered the door and slammed it down, effectively covering the male on the other side. I rubbed my temples, trying to lure the slight headache away with the touch of my fingertips.

Thank you for reading what I've managed to put up so far.

I'm still trying to decide whether or not to make it follow the romance path or the rivalmance path. Any opinions?