Hi readers! I'm so sorry I didnt update in so long! I have been literally DROWNING in homework! DROWNING, I TELL YOU! And I changed my name. I'm still shootforthestars, except now my name is ThE fLoWeR cHiLd Of ThE 6o'S, so dont think that someone stole my story or whatever. Yup. So how's it goin? Um. ANYWAY, Disclaimers: I do not own tinsel fairies, Rudolph the Dark Green Fir Tree, the pretty yellow tape, Professor Snake's Barbie doll, a Wizard Monopoly set, an Invisibility Blankie, a national anthem-singing book, or the Window of Air Heads. Haha, lots of disclaimers. ...WAIT! HOLD THE PHONE! Disclaimers are stuff I dont own! But dont I really own all this stuff? Im the one making this stuff up! ...uuuuhhhh...you know what, I dont care. This is my version of disclaimers. JK Rowling knows that Harry Potter belongs to her. But HAROLD PLODDER belongs to me! :D Enjoy the chappie!
Chapter 12: The Window of Air Heads
Harold woke up one cold December morning to see the Pigzits grounds blanketed with snow. Staring more intently, he noticed that the lake was frozen solid. Hagger was outside his hut giving CPR to a delivery owl. Directly below him, Professor Quiddle was yelling at the Weezy twins while ten snowballs threw themselves repeatedly at his head. Harold put all these observations together and came up with one conclusion.
"CHRISTMAS IS COMING!" he yelled.
Don yelped in surprise, sitting bolt upright in his bed. "Wazgoinon?" he choked out.
"CHRISTMAS IS COMING!" Harold repeated, jumping up and down on his bed.
Don glared at him. "It really took you this long?" he grumbled. "Did you fail to notice Professor Fitflick decorating his Christmas tree during Charms last week?"
Harold stopped jumping. "He's decorating?" he gasped. "I gotta see it!"
"That's my point! We already saw it!" Don threw up his hands in frustration.
"Come on, come on, or we'll miss the tinsel fairies!" cried Harold, yanking his bathrobe over his pajamas and grabbing Don by the arm.
"Wait, wait!" Don tried to grab his bathrobe, but was already whisked through the doorway by Harold. "I NEED MY ROBE!" he howled back up the staircase. "HE ALREADY PUT UP THE TINSEL FAIRIES!"
The Christmas bug had bitten every student in Pigzits; no one could wait for the holiday break. The whole castle was being cleaned and decorated, but Sneeze would sometimes take out his family-sized ketchup bottle and squirt Christmas carols of his own composition on the freshly-scrubbed walls. Not every place in the castle was warm and toasty, either; while the Diffindor living room and the Great Dining Room had roaring fires, the hallways were bewitched to blow harsh, frigid winds day and night. Students had to be careful of any loose papers if their bags were open, because they would get caught up in the breeze and would fly all around the hallway. And if Sneeze was in one of these hallways while a homework paper was floating around, he would seize it, squirt a ketchup F onto it, and plaster it to the student's forehead. The Potions classroom was especially unbearable. Snake kept his door open for the whole class, allowing the winds to race into the dungeon. This was why many students had a hard time taking notes.
Apparently, Drake Snalfoy managed to ignore the winds by continually taunting Harold. "It's too bad that some people have to stay here at Pigzits since they aren't wanted at home," he sneered one day.
"It's too bad that some people can't get anyone to laugh at how a crocodile could replace me as Looker next, and has to resort to taunting me about my family, which, by the way, no one cares about," said Harold loftily, without looking up from measuring his armadillo spit. The Diffindors laughed. Snalfoy glared at Harold, crushing his crystal phial in his fist. The Diffindors laughed harder.
It was true that Harold wasn't going back to the Durskeys for Christmas. As soon as Professor McGummable had come around asking who was staying at Pigzits for the holiday break, Harold had signed up immediately. He had absolutely no desire to go back to the Durskeys and watch Spudley open one hundred more presents and himself unwrap a can of Manwich. He hated Manwich. Don and his brothers were staying too, so Harold didn't feel sorry for himself one bit; this would probably be the greatest Christmas he ever experienced.
When Harold and Don left Potions, they saw that a large fir tree was blocking the hallway up ahead. Two enormous feet were visible underneath it, and loud grunting noises came from the other side.
"Hagger!" Harold and Don exclaimed. "Need any help?"
"Nah, I've got it," growled Hagger, peering around the side of the tree and grinning at the two boys. "Isn't he a beauty?"
"What, the tree?" said Harold.
"No, Professor Snake," snapped Hagger.
"What is it?" drawled a voice. Professor Snake was walking down the hallway.
"Oh, nothing, Professor," said Don cheerily. "Hagger was just saying how beautiful you are today!"
"No - I didn't mean -" stammered Hagger.
"What?" said Harold with mock surprise. "You mean you don't think he's beautiful?"
"You think he's ugly?" added Don.
"No! I just - I didn't - I mean - yer very - uh - handsome!" Hagger's face was bright red. Snake stared at him with a strange expression on his face. Suddenly, he took his hand and flipped his hair away from his face.
"Why, thank you!" he said, smiling slyly. "Excuse me, boys." And he continued down the hallway, his walk instantly becoming more of a strut. Harold pretended to throw up, while Don stuffed his fist in his mouth to conceal his laughter.
"Nice one, Hagger," he gasped when Snake was gone.
"Er - thanks - now, anyway, I named this tree Rudolph!" exclaimed Hagger, beaming. He began to drag the tree towards the Great Dining Room.
Harold and Don stared at him. "Rudolph?" Harold repeated.
"Yeah! Yeh know…the reindeer? With a red nose? Who was bullied by the other reindeers?"
"Yes…" said Harold. "But -"
"No," Don interrupted. "Who's Rudolph?"
Hagger looked shocked. "Well, now, don't tell me yeh never heard of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer! It's a great story, actually, see, there was this little reindeer…."
An hour passed. Harold was leaning on the wall, eyes closed, drool dripping out of his mouth.
"Harold! HAROLD!"
"Wha -" Harold opened his eyes. "What?"
"Hagger finished the story!" said Don. "Come on, we have to see the Great Dining Room!"
Hagger led the way in the room, dragging Rudolph the Dark Green Fir Tree with him.
"Hagger! Ah, the last tree! Put it in the far corner, would you?" called Professor Fitflick's voice. Harold saw the little man standing on a stepladder, brandishing his wand at a bag of tinsel on the floor.
"TINSEL FAIRIES!" cried Harold, and sprinted across the room.
Once the last tree was placed, Harold, Don, and Hagger stood back to admire the effect.
"That looks great!" cried Hagger. "I named the trees after all the reindeer!"
Harold frowned. After a moment, Don frowned too.
"What?" said Hagger.
"Hagger - there's only nine reindeer. There's twelve trees. What did you name the other three?" asked Harold.
Hagger squinted across the hall. "Oh! Er - I - uh - well, that one's - er - Santa Claus, that one's Mrs. Claus, and this one here is - uh - Frosty the Snowman!" He grinned triumphantly.
"Great," said Don. "Harold, we'd better go, we have to get to the library!"
"Oh, yeah!" said Harold.
"What are yeh goin' to the library for?" asked Hagger.
"Oh, nothing, just trying to find out who Nick Sleighbell is, that's all," said Harold airily.
"What? WAIT! YEH CAN'T DO THAT!" yelled Hagger, but Harold and Don were already sprinting away.
They had been trying to look up the man ever since Hagger had accidentally given them the information. How else were they going to find out what Snake was trying to steal? However handsome he thought he was, he was still up to something. But since they knew nothing about Sleighbell, other than that his name sounded Christmas-themed, they didn't know where to look. He wasn't in Awesome Wizards of the Twentieth Century, or Important Discoveries of Modern Magic, or even A Study of Recent Wizarding Stuff. And this wasn't even a thousandth of the amount of books that resided in the library.
Harold really wanted to look in the Top Secret Section, but you needed a signed note from a teacher in order to get the book you required. And as he didn't have any idea what book he needed or a signed note, all he could do was stare longingly at the yellow tape that separated the section from the rest of the library.
"What are you doing?" snapped Madam Pinch, the librarian.
"Um…staring at the pretty yellow tape!" said Harold quickly.
"The pretty yellow tape doesn't need to be stared at!" Madam Pinch smacked Harold's arm with her extremely sharp bookmark.
"YEOWCH!" cried Harold.
"Stop wasting time!" she snarled. "Go do something that doesn't involve staring at the pretty yellow tape! That's my job!"
And Harold ran away, rubbing the paper cut on his arm.
Five minutes later, he, Don, and Heidi made their way back to the Great Dining Room for lunch. "Make sure you keep looking while I'm gone!" Heidi reminded them for the hundredth time.
"WE KNOW, HEIDI!" roared Don, spraying spaghetti sauce all over the table. Ian and Sean howled with laughter.
"We'll let you know if we find anything," said Harold, wiping up the sauce with a napkin. "And it'd be safe to ask your parents if they've ever heard of him."
"Extremely safe, as they're both dentists," said Heidi, grinning.
The next few days of Christmas vacation were very fun. Harold and Don got the living room to themselves most of the time, and Don started teaching Harold a game called Wizard Monopoly. It was a lot like real Monopoly, but had many different details to it. The pieces had a charm on them that made them walk and talk, the money was mini wizards' Twalleons, Fickles, and Sknuts, little huts and castles appeared on properties by themselves, and so on. Harold wasn't very good; he'd grown up with Spudley, and the only game Spudley ever played that wasn't a videogame was dodge ball.
On Christmas Eve, Harold went to bed looking forward to the feast and stealing some tinsel fairies from the Great Dining Room, but didn't expect to get any gifts. However, the first thing he saw when he woke up (other than the canopy of his bed) was a small pile of boxes covered with brightly-colored wrapping paper.
"HOLY CRAP!" he yelled.
"Aaarrrg!" cried Don, sitting bolt upright in his bed. "What is it this time?"
"I've got presents!" screamed Harold, bouncing on his bed again, but this time swinging his pillow around like a baton.
"Of course you do! Its freaking Christmas!" Don pulled his robe on, scowling. "Next time you wake me up, you'd better be dying!"
"Okay," said Harold, leaping off his bed and landing in front of the pile of presents. He picked up the top package, which was poorly wrapped. A Blue's Clues sticker said To Harold, From Hagger. Inside was a miniature banjo. It looked as though Hagger had made it himself.
"A banjo?" laughed Don. "What does he think you need a banjo for?"
"No idea," said Harold, grinning. He picked up a tiny envelope and ripped it open. The note inside said: Enclosed is your Christmas present. From Uncle Herman and Aunt Pansy. Taped to the inside of the envelope was a dime.
"A frickin' dime?" roared Harold in outrage.
"Wow!" Don was staring at the dime in awe. "Can I have it?"
"Knock yourself out." Harold threw the dime at Don and hit him in the forehead. "Who do you think sent me these?" He indicated the rest of the packages.
Don went red. "Well, that one is from my mom," he muttered, pointing to a large, lumpy present. "I told her not to get you something, but she never listens to me!"
"Hey, it's a pair of sweatpants!" cried Harold in surprise. The sweatpants were emerald green and had the words Harold Plodder knitted on the butt part.
"Nice," chuckled Harold.
"Oh my God, I am going to die of embarrassment right now," groaned Don.
"Why? I love them!" Harold was already stepping out of his pajama bottoms and yanking the sweatpants on. He turned around and stuck out his butt. "How's it look?"
"Um…amazing, Harold. Just amazing," said Don sarcastically.
"And it comes with fudge balls!" Harold opened the box and ate one. "Yummy!"
The next present was from Heidi - a large box of Chocolate Hogs and Every Flavor Gummies. There was only one gift left. Harold picked it up and felt it - it felt soft and light. He ripped it open, and out fell a silvery blanket.
"Aww!" cried Harold, picking it up and hugging it. "Someone sent me a blankie!"
"That's not just a blankie!" Don exclaimed. "That's an Invisibility Blankie! Try it on, Harold!"
Harold draped the blankie over his shoulders and looked in the mirror. Sure enough, his head was floating in midair.
"AWESOME!" he yelled.
Don gasped. "A note fell out of it!" He pointed towards the floor.
Harold picked it up and unfolded it. It said:
Your father left this blankie in my possession before he died. Its about time it was returned to you. Use it wisely.
There was no signature. Harold stared at the note. Don stared at the Blankie. The Blankie stared at nothing.
"I want a Blankie," moaned Don.
Harold didn't answer. Had this really belonged to his dad?
The door to the dormitory banged open, and Ed and Gordy strutted in. Harold shoved the Blankie behind his back.
"Merry Christmas!" they sang.
"Hey, look!" said Ed excitedly. "Harold's got Weezy sweatpants too!"
"Turn around and show me your butt!" Gordy ordered.
Feeling extremely stupid, Harold turned around and bent over.
"Niiiiiice," said Ed. "Man, she put more effort into yours! It has your last name on it!" He and Gordy bent over. Theirs only said Ed and Gordy.
"Don! Why aren't you wearing yours?" cried Gordy. "Come on, pull them on, they're nice and cozy warm!"
Don pulled on his sweatpants just as Henry walked in.
"What's going on in here?" he said crossly. His sweatpants were draped over one arm.
"Henry, m'brotha!" said the twins, running over and sandwiching Henry between them. "Why don't you have your sweatpants on yet?"
"I'm not wearing them," grunted Henry stiffly.
"Oh, yes you are!" said Gordy. He threw Henry to the ground, and he and Ed yanked off his pajama pants and exchanged them with the sweatpants. Harold stifled a laugh when he saw that the butt said Henry the Prefect.
"Yep, you don't mess with Ed and Gordy," Don muttered.
"And you're sitting with us today, because we matter in your life," said Ed, like he was scolding a naughty toddler. "You're little Prefect friends can wait!"
And with that, they marched Henry from the room.
Harold had a lot of fun at dinner that night. There was lots and lots of food, and Wizard Crackers were scattered all down the tables. They were very different from normal Shmuggle crackers. Harold pulled one with Ed, and it didn't crack at all; it let off a bang like a cannon and confetti was spewed into the air, flying around the room. Up at the high table, Dunderbore pulled a cracker with Snake. It banged and spewed confetti, and the little presents flew out of it. Dunderbore caught his, which was a pair of giant rainbow bunny slippers. Snake tried to catch his, but missed and it smacked into his chest, making him topple backwards. When he finally regained his balance, he stared at his present, which turned out to be a Barbie doll. Harold and Don burst into laughter.
Harold finally left the table with Don, carrying the following: a package of his own multicolored flying confetti, a Grow-Your-Own-Third-Arm kit, and a brand new Wizard Monopoly game. He dropped the novelties in his dormitory and spent the rest of the afternoon having a furious snowball fight with the Weezy twins. The twins bewitched the snowballs to either explode on contact, melt into freezing cold water on contact, or keep smashing into the target's head. After three hours of war, the four boys trekked back up to Diffindor Tower, gasping and spluttering, and changed into dry clothes. Harold played Don in Wizard Monopoly and lost pathetically.
"It's all your fault!" he yelled.
"What?" cried Henry.
"If you hadn't tried to help me so much I would've beat him!"
"That's a lie!" roared Henry. "You needed my help!"
"I did not!" snapped Harold.
"Did too!"
"Did not!"
While they were arguing, Ed snatched Henry's Prefect badge from the front of his robes, and Harold and Don sat back to watch Ed and Gordy play Monkey in the Middle, with Henry in the middle, of course. Harold had been right; this was the best Christmas he had ever experienced. But he had been itching to try out the Invisibility Blankie all day.
Once Don finally fell asleep, Harold pulled the Blankie out of his suitcase and ducked underneath it. He checked his reflection in the mirror to make sure he was invisible (he was), tiptoed down the tower stairs, pushed open the portrait hole, and climbed out.
"Who's that?" said the Fat Cat sharply, but Harold didn't answer. Where should he go? He could go anywhere in Pigzits. Then he remembered the Top Secret Section in the library. He could search for Sleighbell for as long as he needed to without getting caught. Pulling the Blankie closer to him, he set off.
He flicked on a flashlight when he reached the library. It was pitch black and pretty creepy at night. Harold stepped over the pretty yellow tape and began to scan the titles of the books. If they even had titles. Lots of them didn't. He finally chose one at random and let it fall open in his arms.
"OH SAY CAN YOU SEEEEE! BY THE DAWN'S EARLY LIGHT!" screeched the book, extremely off key.
"Shut up, shush, shut up!" hissed Harold, petrified.
"WHAT'S SO PROOOUD-LY WE HAAAIL, AT THE TWI-LIGHT'S LAST GLEA-MING!"
Harold panicked. He banged the book on the shelf over and over.
"WHO'S BROUGHT - ow - STRIPES AND - ow - BRIGHT STAAAARS! THROUGH THE - OW - PERILOUS - OW - FIIIGHT!"
"SHUT UP!" roared Harold, and, finally realizing what he should've done in the first place, slammed the book shut. He shoved it back in its spot on the bookshelf, breathing heavily. He jumped up and ran for it; in his hastiness, he dropped his flashlight. Filth stormed through the library doors and Harold just managed to duck under his arm. He sprinted down the hallway, the Star Spangled Banner still ringing in his ears.
Turning a corner, he suddenly realized that he had no idea where he was going. He skidded to a stop just as Filth came around the corner, holding the flashlight, followed by none other than Samuel Snake.
"They can't be far away!" wheezed Filth.
"Hurry up!" snapped Snake, striding ahead of the caretaker. "We'll never catch them at this pace!"
Harold looked around wildly, and noticed a doorway that was ajar. Thanking his lucky stars, he squeezed through it and waited until the footsteps were long gone before taking off the Blankie.
He turned around, facing the rest of the room, and gasped. Dominating the scene was a giant multicolored window floating in midair in the middle of the room. Harold crept closer, bemused. Upon closer inspection, the mirror looked like it was made of Air Heads. He stretched out a finger and touched it. Gooey. It was definitely made of Air Heads. He stared into it, and cried out in shock.
Two people were standing on the other side of the window, staring out at him, smiling and waving, though their eyes were filled with sadness. Harold peered around the side of the window. No one was standing behind it. He looked in again. The man had extremely messy black hair, and was wearing glasses. The woman had red hair, and her eyes…her eyes are green, like mine, thought Harold. They're even the same shape! He had his nose pressed against the window now.
"Mom?" he whispered. "Dad?"
His parents nodded and pressed their hands against the glass. Harold pressed his hands against theirs. He ached with joy and agony as he saw his parents for the first time in ten years. He stood there for hours, staring into their faces, but eventually became so exhausted he knew he had to get to bed. He tore his eyes away from his mothers face, whispered, "I'll come back," and hurried from the room.
"You could've woken me up," said Don crossly the next morning.
"But you said not to wake you up unless I was dying!" Harold reminded him.
"Well…you could've…uh…pretended," he muttered.
"I'm going back tonight, you can come then." Harold stared into space.
"Harold?" Don waved his hand in front of his face. "Aren't you hungry? You need to eat something!"
"No I don't," said Harold. Who cared about food? He could care less about that Nick Sleighbell guy now. He was going to see his parents tonight. Who cared what the three-headed cat was guarding? And did it really matter if Snake stole it?
"Harold?" Don looked at him uneasily. "You look strange. Are you all right?"
Harold was terrified that he wouldn't be able to find the window again that night. But after an hour of desperate searching, he saw the door.
"Here it is!" he whispered excitedly, and dragged Don into the room, throwing the Blankie off of them. He skidded to a stop in front of the window, and there they were, smiling and waving again.
"See?" he said breathlessly.
"No," said Don. "Were you making this all up?"
"No!" snapped Harold. "Here, stand in front of it, you'll see…" He shoved Don in front of the window. His parents disappeared. All he could see was Don with his Build-A-Bear pajamas.
Don, however, was staring transfixed at the reflection.
"Oh my God!" he gasped. "Look at me…I look sexy!"
"What?" said Harold, staring more intently at the window. But the reflection hadn't changed.
"Lookit!" said Don excitedly, pointing at himself. "I'm holding the House Cup - the Quippish Cup - I'm Head Boy - Quippish Captain - do you think this window shows the future?"
"No." Harold was beginning to feel annoyed. "My parents are dead! Move over, I want a turn."
"You had your turn all last night!"
"I want to see my mom and dad!"
"OW! You pinched me!" Don looked shocked.
Their argument ended as they heard a noise in the hallway. Harold whipped out the Blankie and threw it over him and Don just as Mrs. Morris padded into the room. Her eyes were fixed on the exact spot in which they were standing. Could she see through the Blankie? After what seemed like forever, she turned around and left.
"Come on Harold, this is dangerous, she could've gone to get Filth," whispered Don, and he dragged Harold away.
The next day Harold sat in an armchair in the Diffindor living room staring into the fire.
"Wanna play Monopoly, Harold?" asked Don.
"No."
"Let's go visit Hagger, then…see if he's named any other Christmas decorations."
"No…you can go…"
"Harold," said Don seriously. "I know what your thinking. Don't go back to that window tonight. Its dangerous. It may be made of Air Heads, but I don't trust it."
Harold said nothing. He continued to stare into the fire, knowing that he was definitely going back to the window tonight, no matter what Don said.
The next night he found his way much quicker than before. He sat pretzel style in front of the window, watching his parents wave at him. Nothing could tear him away from this spot. Nothing.
Except….
"So…back again, Harold?"
Harold whirled around, his insides freezing. Standing behind him was none other than Albert Dunderbore.
"I - I - I didn't see you there," he stammered.
"I don't need a Blankie to become invisible," he said mysteriously. Harold felt the feeling come back into his limbs when he saw Dunderbore give him a goofy smile. The headmaster skipped across the floor and plopped down next to Harold.
"So, Harold, you have discovered the Window of Air Heads, like a whole bunch of other people before you," he said.
"Why is it made of Air Heads?" asked Harold curiously.
"I have no idea." Dunderbore pulled a bag of Twizzlers out of his pocket and began to chew on one. "Do you know what it does by now?"
"Um…it showed me my parents…"
"And it showed Don Weezy as Head Boy."
"How do you know that?" gasped Harold.
"I'm a hippie," said Dunderbore simply. "Hippies know these kind of things." He chewed up the Twizzler and took out another one. "So…can you think of what the window shows us all?"
"Nope," said Harold.
"Let me help you. The happiest man in the whole entire universe could use the Window of Air Heads like a normal window, and see his reflection exactly the way he is."
Harold thought. "It shows us…the things we want?"
"Yes and no," Dunderbore swallowed the Twizzler and took five more out of the bag. "It show us the deepest desires of our hearts. You, Harold Plodder, have never known your parents as you grew up, so you see them standing next to you. Don Weezy, who has always been out performed by his brothers, sees himself standing alone, better than all of them." He chomped up the Twizzlers and took out more. "But this window does not tell the future. Only crystal balls do that, if used correctly. Men have committed suicide in front of the window because they could not bear to see what lies within. I sure hope that doesn't happen to you, Harold."
Harold gulped.
"Don't worry," said Dunderbore. "The window will be moved to a new home tomorrow, so don't waste your life looking for it. If you ever see it again, you will now know what to expect. It's not worth it to dwell on things that aren't real. Now, why don't you wrap yourself in that Blankie and get back to bed?"
Harold stood up and picked up the Blankie. Dunderbore finished chewing his Twizzlers and hopped up too, accidentally dumping the bag upside down and spilling the rest of the candy everywhere.
"Aw, crap!" he shouted. "That was my last freaking bag!"
"Professor?" said Harold. "What do you see when you look in the window?"
"Who, me? I see myself NOT dropping my precious Twizzlers."
Harold stared at him.
"I always have a limited amount," sighed Dunderbore, bending over to pick them up. "No one gets me Twizzlers for Christmas. They think I'm going to get a cavity. But I always brush my teeth! It's not fair!"
"O-kay then," said Harold. "I'll be off, then."
Only when he was back in his bed when Harold realized that Dunderbore probably didn't tell the truth. But then, he had asked a pretty personal question.
Well? Didja like? :D It's too bad I didnt write this chappie during Christmas. Oh well. Now, apparently you people dont get it. Dont get what? you ask. Well, I know that more people are reading my story than they are reviewing. So let me make this quite clear: IF I DONT GET ENOUGH REVIEWS, I WILL NOT UPDATE ANYMORE, YOU FREELOADERS! Im sick of getting reviews from the same people every time and no one new is reviewing. Now, dont get me wrong, I LOVE any kind of review, so the veterans please keep reviewing! Thanks so much to stuckinadream, Melikecake, and AnnaAza for reviewing all my chappies! :D ME LUVS YOU! Keep it up!