CHAPTER FORTY FIVE
"What does inquiries are continuing mean exactly! Sod all then, fine!" Yvonne winced as Karen flung the cordless phone at the settee, "don't, Yvonne, just don't." The lounge door slammed as Karen stormed upstairs, Yvonne sighed. Karen had moved in three weeks earlier, an event celebrated by their nearest and dearest, they were both happier than they had been for a long time. There were no doubts. The failure of the police to track Jim down however played continually on Karen's mind in particular. The call which had sent Karen marching upstairs was one of many, and it sounded like it had gone the same way as all the others. Yvonne left Karen alone for half an hour, and then armed with her trusty mug of Tetley she ventured upstairs. She found Karen lying on her back, her eyes unblinking, staring at the ceiling.
"Half an hour? How restrained of you."
"Yeah well I learnt from the last time, you threw a cushion at my head." Yvonne placed the mug down carefully and perched on the bed next to Karen. Karen pulled herself up and taking Yvonne's hand, held it between her own two.
"I'm sorry."
"Karen don't, you've apologised to me far too much over the last few weeks."
"I'm being a miserable cow."
"You're having trouble getting over something that happened to you, that's all."
"Why can't they just find him, he's out there somewhere."
"If they do? Then what? We'll have to wait for the police to charge him, then a trial or whatever. It will always be the next thing, if he goes to prison Karen how long do you think he'll get?"
"Oh very helpful Yvonne! Just what I need."
"It is what you need, and it's only because I love you so much that I'm telling you, Jim will always be there until you let go and move on. The police may get him, they may not. If they don't are you, no we, going to spend the rest of our lives waiting for him to turn up? I won't live like that." Karen watched as Yvonne left the room, she was right, she knew she was right. In amongst her tirade had been a declaration of love, and a suggestion that they would spend their lives together. That was what she should be focusing on, their future, since the attack she had achieved the look of normalcy. She'd moved in with Yvonne, gone back to work, planned her first staff event (a Halloween fancy dress party), behind closed doors however she'd been snappy and withdrawn. She'd barely let Yvonne come near her. It had to stop. Karen downed her lukewarm tea as if it were vodka, and turned to look at her reflection. There was only so much that Clarins could do, she did look as though she had been worrying about something for weeks. There were lines across her forehead, dark circles under her eyes, and her skin looked grey and tired. She poured a generous amount of moisturiser into her palms and rubbed it into her face, she changed out of her old jeans into a skirt and a soft, white cotton top. At least her legs still looked good. She set her hair into a loose pony tail and turned to look again in the mirror, she seemed more like herself.
Yvonne sat in the conservatory, smoking pensively, she'd said too much, been too harsh. It wasn't exactly how she'd imagined declaring her love, or asking Karen to spend her life with her. Yvonne groaned, what a mess!
"I love you too." Yvonne whipped around to see Karen standing behind her.
"I didn't mean to blurt it out like that."
"I know, but you said it, and you meant it."
"Of course I did."
"And I mean it too, I love you, and everything you said was true. I've got to move on, regardless of what the police do or don't do. All these weeks, I could have been enjoying my new home, and I've been moping around. What did I do to deserve you?"
"Ahh well, you must have done something right somewhere!" Karen settled herself down on Yvonne's lap, and folded her arms around her neck.
"It occurred to me that I should really repay you for my foul mood over the last weeks."
"Oh yes?"
"Yes, so what should I do?" Yvonne ran her hands underneath Karen's top, up her back.
"I'm sure I could think of a few things."
"Helen I'm bored."
"Oh well I'm so sorry, I mean we are looking for a flat for you, how selfish of me."
"Don't be like that."
"You are so difficult to please." Helen collapsed on the bench they had reached, and pulled her coat around her tighter. "Nikki we've seen loads of places, I can't believe that not one of them suited you, what about the last one?" Nikki shrugged, scuffing her boots along the ground.
"It felt wrong."
"Why?" Nikki shrugged again and settled next to Helen on the bench.
"Oh I don't know, please don't be mad at me Helen." Nikki shuffled even closer, and spying a gap between Helen's thin jumper and coat planted her lips there.
"Nikki!"
"Are you mad at me?"
"Even if I really tried I don't think I could be mad at you. I just want to see you settled and happy."
"Oh there are plenty of places I could be happy enough in, but being settled, that can't happen until…well it can't happen yet."
"Until what Nikki?"
"I think you know Helen, but you're not ready."
"You mean find somewhere for both of us don't you?"
"I just think it's silly looking at all these flats and apartments for one, when I know eventually we'll be living together. We should be looking for a place we can grow into, a place of our own."
"You're right.."
"I know it's all a lot to take in, what?"
"You're right, we should be looking for our own place. I can't live with my brother forever and what's the point you getting a place for one when we're together."
"Really? I mean it's a bit of a turnaround?"
"I know but I've spent too many months worrying about too many things, I want us to be together and I think our own place is the best way to make a fresh start. There are some things I need to do first though, things that I need to talk to Duncan about."
"Cerys." Helen turned sharply to look at Nikki,
"Why do you think that?"
"It seems to me an awful lot comes back to you and her, she was more than your sister-in-law wasn't she Helen." Helen looked straight ahead, refusing to make eye-contact with Nikki,
"Mel."
"She told me you were in love with her, actually she put me straight about a few things."
"Can't say the thought of you and Mel having a chat is comforting, she's always been a straight talker. I have beaten myself up about my feelings for Cerys since she died."
"We can't help how we feel Helen, we're humans not machines, the day we can turn our feelings off like a tap will be the day I give up."
"It wasn't just feelings Nikki, that's the point, we kissed, we nearly did much more." Nikki listened patiently as Helen relayed to her the events of the day in Scotland that had played on her mind. Some time later when Helen had talked herself out, she looked to Nikki with sad eyes.
"Do you hate me now?"
"Of course not, why would I hate you?"
"I'm a bad person, my brother's wife."
"Look Helen, it sounds as though Cerys was just as much to blame as you, I know she's gone she can't defend herself but something like that takes two. You didn't pounce on her, in fact it sounds as though you were doing your damned hardest to avoid her because you knew there was an attraction."
"Maybe, but Duncan's hardly going to want to listen to me blame his dead wife."
"True, the fact you're here and she isn't means that you'll get the brunt of his anger. Your brother's a sensible guy though Helen, he'll hear you out and he will forgive you. You have to tell him and soon, this has been eating you up for months hasn't it?" Helen nodded miserably. "You're not a bad person Helen, and the sooner you believe that the better." Nikki stood, pulling Helen up by the hand as she did, wrapping her up in a comforting hug she kissed her gently on the forehead. "No more guilt, ok? We're starting a new chapter now, hey do you like what I did there?"
"Very good Nikki, me an author, a new chapter, witty."
"I thought so, speaking of chapters we should be hearing from your publishers any day now." They started to walk arm in arm towards the car,
"I know, I'm so nervous Nik."
"Because it's a new style, or because it's being published in your own name?"
"Stop being perceptive, you're creeping me out a bit now! Both I guess, though more the name, without sounding big-headed because of Claire I know the content is good. It's just I'll have nothing to hide behind now, I'll have to do all those offensive publicity things, interviews, black tie balls, meeting famous people."
"You Helen Stewart are secretly looking forward to it, anyway I'm sure I could step in and protect you, fend off all those famous faces."
"You're not leaving my side, I'll be terrified on my own."
"Never, darling."
CHAPTER FORTY SIX
"This has to be the daftest idea you have ever had!"
"As daft as us living together sweetheart?" Yvonne grimaced as she attempted to force her legs into a pair of exceptionally tight leather trousers,
"That Karen, was a moment of clarity, this is just stupid!" Yvonne had decided not to buy or rent an outfit, but had instead thrown things together from her wardrobe. She said she was a vampire, in fact she was merely wearing the oldest and tightest pieces of leather clothing she owned. Karen shrugged and smiled as she fixed her make-up, she had decided to go as Morticia Addams, a close fitting long dress and a black wig was all she needed. She had to admit, she looked the part and she couldn't help feeling just a little smug. Yvonne wriggled, and writhed, finally succeeding in pulling the trousers up to her waist.
"Ok?"
"Yeah…can't….actually…breath…but …I'm…in!"
"Exactly how are you going to get out of them?"
"I've only just got in, why would I want to get out?" Karen raised her eyebrows suggestively and dragged an exceedingly long, black fingernail up Yvonne's thigh, "Oh, sorry love, not tonight I think I've done myself an injury!"
"Oh well I'll find some way of amusing myself I'm sure! Come on."
Supersavers had rented a large ballroom in a hotel in the centre of town, Sunday night though not traditional for parties was the best night as it meant everyone could go with the store closing at 4. Some people had booked a room for the night, determined to make the most of the venue. Helen and Nikki had opted for the hotel room option, and Nikki was secretly thinking what a good idea it had been as Helen seemed to be in no particular hurry to get ready.
"Hel come on!"
"Nikki, the ballroom is two floors below us, plenty of time." Helen wafted past, the scent of lemons lingering as she returned to the bathroom for more adjustments. Nikki sighed and flung her legs over the side of the chair, she didn't miss the uptight, worrying Helen. This new Helen however, was going to take a bit of getting used to. She hummed, as she moved around the rooms, picking up pieces of her costume, she smiled as she finished her make up.
"Well, will I do?" Helen stood and turned around,
"Very glamorous."
"That's not exactly the look I was going for, I'm a witch."
"If I'd had witches like you in my nightmares, I wouldn't have been scared to go to sleep!" They slipped into a familiar, comfortable embrace,
"You look great, that cloak is very dramatic." Nikki had decided to go as The Phantom of the Opera, she had to admit the costume was good. All black, apart from the lining of the cloak which was a vivid purple, and the mask that covered half her face, which was white.
"Come on," Nikki held her arm out for Helen to take, "let's go party!"
The décor was suitably dark and gothic, lots of black and red. Karen had been determined to make the party a success. Previous events had consisted of a buffet at the local conservative club, and if they were lucky a few tunes from the local DJ man. This time it was classy. A jazz band greeted the partygoers as they entered the room. Macabre met ghostly and ghastly, for a 'work do' it was certainly an achievement. Karen felt proud of herself as she walked into the hall on Yvonne's arm to rapturous applause. Her efforts had been noticed, and appreciated. After thanking people and stopping to talk to a few colleagues Karen and Yvonne finally reached Helen and Nikki who had commandeered a prime position by the bar. A selection of specially designed cocktails were being poured out, all of which had a horrifying Halloween theme.
"Selena hasn't been near these has she?" Karen eyed the mixtures dubiously,
"If she had I wouldn't be having any!" Nikki laughed, whilst waving a glass filled with a vibrant red liquid. "A good friend she may be, a barmaid, she's not!" The friends chatted amiably as they watched people arrive. Helen pointed across the room,
"Who do you think that is? The Grim Reaper one."
"I think Ken said he was coming as that, he said he was borrowing the costume off his brother-in-law." Ken was something of a gentle giant. The store's security guard, he would never really scare anybody but he cared about everyone and was conscientious.
"Should I be asking exactly why his brother-in-law had a spare grim reaper outfit knocking about for him to borrow?" Yvonne enquired. Nikki shrugged,
"I didn't ask to be honest! Look, Selena, she's managed to look glamorous as usual." Selena and Duncan were making their way through the throngs towards them. They had just got back from a weekend in Warwick, they looked very content, very happy. A shadow of worry crossed over Helen's face, indiscernible to all but Nikki.
"Helen, please don't. Come on." Nikki took Helen's hand and dragged her over to a darkened corner. Knowing that she had to talk to Duncan about what had happened with Cerys was terrifying Helen. Instead of just doing it she had come up with excuse after excuse. Duncan now thought that he'd done something wrong and had asked Nikki what was going on.
"I can't do it."
"You have to. You feel guilty all the time,"
"Not all the time."
"Most of the time then."
"He's stressed enough with the trial being delayed until next year, and his new relationship, it's a bad time."
"Or a good time. He hasn't got to worry about court for months, and he's happy because things with Selena are going really well. Helen just do it, I feel bad. He knows something's bothering you, and that I know what it is."
Karen and Yvonne kept their eyes on Helen and Nikki as they chatted,
"Everything alright with them Yvonne?"
"I don't know, hopefully, they're good for each other I think."
"Ladies." Ken stumbled over, his feet apparently getting caught up in his long black Grim Reaper cloak, "Yvonne do you mind if I drag your lovely partner away for a spin on the dance floor."
"Can I just check it's you under that hideous mask first Ken!" Ken pulled the latex mask up and grinned, "mmm well as long as Karen has no objections!"
"As you're going to be doing very little dancing darling because of your chosen attire, I think I'll take Ken up on his very kind offer!" Karen smiled sweetly, and after kissing Yvonne on the cheek followed Ken on to the dance floor.
"Ahh young love!"
"Shut up Nik!"
"Don't be like that Von, you're happy aren't you?"
"Very, worryingly so." Nikki arched an eyebrow questioningly, "sometimes I think things are going too well. We kind of fell into a relationship, into living with each other. Can it really be that easy?"
"I don't think you've had it easy. Fenner's made everything much more complicated, has Karen put it behind her now?"
"She's trying to, but he's like black oil. He seeps into every part of our lives, as much as I tell Karen to forget about him and move on I spend a lot of time thinking about him." Yvonne shook her head as if trying to shake the thought of Fenner out of her head. "We'll be fine, look she's having a great time." Karen was being spun around by Ken, even dressed as Morticia Karen looked graceful. Her long arms and legs made dancing, even dancing with Ken, look elegant.
"You not going to cut in?"
"One, I don't do dancing, two in this get up I'm creaking like an old sofa, so that would be a no!" The song came to an end and Karen re-appeared at Yvonne's side, slightly flushed but obviously very happy. The party continued, there was lots of dancing, chatting, it was everything a good party should be. Karen stood at the bar patiently waiting for her drinks, the free bar had long since finished so she was fishing around for her wallet as she lingered.
"Let me get these." Mark appeared at her side, smiling as he handed over a note and waved away the change.
"Thank you, that's very good of you."
"Do you think we could have chat?"
"Yes, of course. I'll go and give Yvonne her drink, and then I'll be back." When Karen returned she found that Mark had managed to find some comfy seats, for which she was grateful. Her feet burned, courtesy of all the spinning on the dance floor.
"I wanted to say thank you really, I know you must have had a hand in my transfer."
"Mark, you'll make a fantastic store manager. You should have been one by now anyway. I didn't lie in your recommendation, I didn't have to. Nottingham is lucky to have you."
"You're happy?"
"Very. Everyone has been so supportive since what happened." Mark nodded and looked away towards the dance floor. Yvonne was stood at the edge talking to Cassie, pretending not to look at Karen. Karen had a pretty good idea what Mark was working up to say but she let him muse for a while. He finally seemed to have collected his thoughts, and turned back to her.
"When we went out for a drink, you weren't…"
"I wasn't seeing Yvonne. We were always destined to be good friends Mark, nothing else. If I had had feelings for someone else I would have told you at the time."
"I knew that it's just…I needed you to say that I guess."
"You're a lovely guy Mark, you'll make someone very happy you know." Karen kissed Mark on the cheek and left him to his thoughts. She knew he loved her, and she wished there was a switch she could flick so that he didn't feel like that for her anymore. It was good that he was moving, he would be great at Nottingham, and hopefully he would forget about her.
"Be careful darling, you're getting closer to the dance floor!" Karen wound her arms around Yvonne's waist.
"Just watching the show, some of these people dancing, worth the ticket price alone. He ok?"
"Yeah, just thanking me for the recommendation."
"Really?"
"Yes really! Are you jealous?"
"No!" Cassie tried and failed to prevent a snort of laughter,
"If you'll excuse me, there's a flying pig over there I'd quite like to talk to!" She wandered off in search of Roisin. Karen looked at Yvonne,
"Seriously, were you bothered by me talking to Mark?"
"Bothered by you talking to a good looking bloke, who is blatantly in love with you? Why should I be?"
"Don't be sarcastic with me Yvonne. This is ridiculous, we're together, everyone knows we're together. I'm painfully aware of how Mark feels about me, and I'm sorry if you don't like it but I care about him. I feel bad for him. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to dance with Monica, and let you work this little problem of yours out by yourself, you don't need me here while you sulk!" Karen stormed off and disappeared into the crowds on the dance floor, leaving Yvonne lost for words.
The songs became slower and the crowd on the dance floor thinned as people began to make their way home.
"How bad was this row?" Helen had been helping Yvonne look for Karen for some time, and even though there were very few people left there was no sign of her. Yvonne shrugged,
"Not that bad, I was being a jealous idiot, and she stormed off to dance. Not so bad that she'd leave without telling me. She must be here somewhere." Nikki and Selena appeared, both shaking their heads.
"No sign." Selena looked thoughtfully around, "we've checked as many toilets as we could find, knocked on lots of rooms, some of which I wish we hadn't. Did you know Stacy from the deli, was with Adam from Fresh?" Nikki elbowed her in the ribs,
"Not the time, Selena!" She hissed. Their group was increased by the arrival of Cassie, Roisin and Monica.
"Are you sure she hasn't just gone home mate?" Cassie yawned as she leant against Roisin.
"No. She wouldn't leave without telling me, no matter how mad at me she was. Something is wrong."
"Well how about we go back to yours and see if she's there, if you don't mind Yvonne."
"That's a good idea Roisin, I don't want to leave here I'm sure she's here somewhere." Cassie and Roisin left with Yvonne's keys, and Yvonne turned to Monica, "she was dancing with you wasn't she?" Monica nodded, pursing her lips as she tried to remember what had happened.
"We danced for a while and to be honest Yvonne, she wasn't that mad at you really. We danced and then, oh what's his name asked her to dance."
"What's his name?"
"You know, tall, security guard, I'm terrible at names."
"Ken?"
"Yes! Well I say ask, he didn't speak, just sort of tapped her and spun her away. That was the last I saw of her." Nikki screwed her face up thoughtfully,
"Then we need Ken, anyone got his number?" As they looked through their phones, they were interrupted. A disturbance in the foyer captured their attention.
"Somebody call an ambulance!" A body-less voice floated out from the male toilets, they rushed out to see what the commotion was.
"Madam, please." A member of the hotel staff tried to keep Yvonne out but to no avail.
"If you want to keep all your bits in-tact mate I suggest you shift." Yvonne forced her way through, and was met by her worst nightmare. Ken was slumped in one of the cubicles, it was hard to make out what his individual injuries were but there were plenty of them. He'd had a gag removed by the person who had found him, and the only sign of life was a groan.
"Oh my god Ken! Who did this to you?" Yvonne knew what the answer was going to be, and even though his reply was barely more than a whimper, she heard it loud and clear.
"F..F..Fenner. He's got Karen, Yvonne I couldn't stop him."