A/N: As promised, here is chapter 3 of my story.

Your reviews have been the best so far, and I can't begin to describe how much it means to me that you like my writing. Please keep letting me know what you think, good or bad, I'd just like to know=)

I appologize for any errors in syntax, but I am from Norway and we arrange our words slightly differently from English at times and I haven't had English lessons in six years =P

Hope you enjoy this chapter! It's got a lot of McSwarek interaction ;)

Disclaimer: I do not own Rookie Blue or its characters or anything related to the series in any way, shape or form.

Chapter 3

Early October

"Serve, protect and try not to die from boredom" Best said as he finished up that morning's parade. There hadn't been a lot to say as the last couple of days had been a quiet couple of days at 15th division.

Sam was on his feet quickly and was half way out the door when he heard Oliver's voice telling Best; "You know you just jinxed us, right?"

A smile crept over Sam's lips at his friend's superstition and he was still smiling when Andy caught up with him with the bag in the parking lot.

"Hey." She said with a small smile on her face. "You ready for today?"

"Ready for what?" Sam asked as he got in the driver's seat. "Nothing has been happening for days."

"Yeah, well I just meant…" She apparently didn't know what she meant. So, instead of continuing her trail of thought she just threw the bag into the back seat and flopped down in the passenger seat.

"What did you mean?" Sam asked when they'd gotten out on the road.

"Huh?" She'd been zoning out.

"What did you mean earlier? Ready for?"

"Driving?" She proffered.

"What?"

"I don't know." She sighed.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing."

She was hiding something, or wanting to hide something. But he knew her. "The same nothing as last week?"

She remained silent.

Sam rolled his eyes and breathed heavily. "What did he do this time?" He asked dully. He couldn't even remember how many times they had had these conversations about her relationship with Callaghan.

"Nothing. That's the problem." She sighed. "He didn't even…" she trailed off and stared out of the window.

Sam really didn't want to ask. He had heard her whine about it one too many times. Before, he'd been all too keen on listening to her problems and try to offer advice to fix things, or just to get an inside scoop trying to find the slightest glimmer that she'd realized it wasn't meant to be and the whole thing was going south. But now…

She'd been with Callaghan for over a year, and even though he seemingly acted indifferent towards their relationship she still stayed with him. Sam would want nothing more than for her to finally admit that Callaghan wasn't the one for her. For her to realize that she deserved better than a guy who only cared about his career. But she didn't seem to get it, and Sam's emotional stability was deteriorating rapidly from the constant waiting.

He was lost in his thoughts and didn't even notice what he was saying until it was too late. "It's gonna be good to get away."

As he realized his unintended admission, his eyes grew wide and he glanced over at his partner silently hoping that she hadn't heard him. But, no.

"You're going away?" She turned away from the window, and he could feel her eyes on him. "Where to? On vacation? With who?"

"Nowhere."

"Then why did you say it?"

"Say what?" He knew the playing stupid act wouldn't work, but the thought of telling her made his heart sink into his stomach. Somehow he had come to terms with going away and leaving everyone, but the thought of leaving her still tore him up.

"Don't play stupid. You know what you said."

He should tell her. But then it would become real. Then he would really leave her. Like she had been left too many times before. She'd be disappointed, maybe even hate him. He didn't want that. Even so, maybe he should tell her. He would leave no matter what. He had committed already and couldn't back down now. Maybe she wouldn't hate him as much if he gave her a heads up. But it was definitely going to be painful.

"Sam? Sam!" she had apparently been nagging him about answering while he was busy figuring out whether to tell her or not.

"What?"

"Zone out much?" She was clearly annoyed with him.

"Yeah." He sighed heavily.

"What's up with you today?"

"Let's go eat something." He said as he pulled over to the side of the street and unbuckled his seat belt.

"What's going on?"

He couldn't tell her in the squad car. He needed other people around them when he told her. Not because he was afraid that she would take the news badly, but because he was afraid of how he'd react to finally admitting it to her. He figured having strangers around would help him control his emotions.

She was still sitting in the car when he reached the steps in front of the small diner. He turned back and motioned for her to get out and follow him.

He saw her sighing before she complied, unbuckled her seat belt and came out to join him. "What's going on?" She asked as she reached the steps.

He remained silent and pushed through the doors. He knew she was rolling her eyes at him, but he couldn't be bothered with that right now. He had to figure out a good way of telling her. He needed a good explanation. He needed a good way to say –I'm leaving you, but I'm not leaving because of you.

He sat down on a chair near the window and stared out at the car. She sat down opposite him, her eyes near boring a hole in the side of his head.

"So?" She said after a moment of silence.

He stole a look at her before continuing his gazing out the window.

"Sam?" Her voice was laden with irritation, but there was a hint of something else. Insecurity? Worry? He couldn't quite place it.

He breathed deeply and turned to face her.

"McNally." He sighed.

"What's..."

"Be quiet." It was a simple statement. He needed her not to say anything. No questions, no comments. He needed to tell her the way he wanted to.

She looked at him expectantly, but didn't say anything.

"I am leaving."

Her eyes grew larger. "What do you..."

He lifted his hand, and she fell silent.

"I'm going back undercover." It was almost a whisper

Suddenly, her eyes were all over the place. He could see that she was trying to keep her composure.

"They approached me a couple of weeks ago. It's a big case and the guy we're wanting to put away has done some extremely horrible things."

She nodded, but still couldn't keep looking at him for more than a couple of seconds at a time.

"When?"

"Tomorrow." He tried to give her a reassuring look, he tried to tell her everything was going to be okay, but communicating through your eyes is hard when the one you're trying to communicate with won't look at you.

"So soon?" She whispered. "How am I..."

"You're going to be awesome. You are awesome!" He said with a big grin in an effort to lighten the mood, but she didn't bite. The grin slowly left his face.

"You remember what I told you our first shift together right?" He tried to catch her eyes, but they were studying the table a little too intently. "I said I was waiting to go back to guns and gangs. And, like I said, they came to me a couple of weeks ago."

"I know. Or I get it. I mean..." She sighed heavily. "It's what you've wanted, right?" She stole a glance at him, and he could see her eyes brimming with tears.

"Yeah." She looked back down at the table at his reply. "I didn't know how to tell you."

Her eyes whipped back up to stare at him, the sadness in them was now mixed with anger. "You weren't going to tell me?"

He looked at her nervously.

"You were going to leave. And you weren't going to tell me?" Her voice was growing louder.

"McNally..."

"No!" She said sternly. "How was I supposed to find out?"

"Best was, is, going to..."

"At parade? Tomorrow? What the hell Sam?"

People were starting to look, and Sam silently cursed his decision to enter the diner. The waitress hadn't even approached them for their order.

"Let's go back out to the car McNally." He said calmly as he got up from his seat.

"How could you?" she got up from her seat.

Well, at least she was looking at him again, he thought as he smiled apologetically to the waitress and some of the patrons as he passed them on his way to the door. "Don't turn your back on me Sam!" He picked up his pace and was quickly out the door and back in the car. He watched wearily as she stormed out of the diner and over to the car before she ripped open the door on the driver's side.