Hi everyone. I just wanted to thank you all for you well wishes about Charlie the hamster. Unfortunately, he couldn't recover from his stroke and although I was nursing him as best I could, I found him very weak yesterday morning and had to make the decision to take him to the vet to be put to sleep. I feel very sad but he had a happy life and it was very peaceful. He was ready to go. So, thank you everyone for your support. I hope you enjoy the chapter. Love, IJKS xxx
Chapter Twenty
Joey jogged up to Crystal, calling her name and trying to catch up. The blonde barmaid turned around and disarmed Joey with a smile.
"I'm sorry about that," Joey said earnestly. "But you didn't have to leave. We could still..."
"You were right, Joey," Crystal said gently. "It's not a good idea for us to get involved."
Joey frowned and shoved her hands in her pockets.
"You're still in love with her."
"I'm not!" Joey protested. "I was yelling at her only two seconds ago. Weren't you there?"
Crystal laughed and nodded.
"Oh, I was there," she said. "And I still maintain that you're in love with her."
"But..."
"Shall we sit?" Crystal suggested, gesturing to the beach.
Uncertainly, Joey followed her date onto the sand.
Charlie remained in her chair, finishing her drink slowly and calmly and choosing to ignore the looks she was receiving from other customers. She looked up when Angelo, out of uniform and dressed in blue jeans and a white t-shirt, entered. He ordered two drinks and then joined her without permission.
"Sorry for anything I've done wrong," he said.
"Including being presumptuous enough to assume I want to have a drink with you?" Charlie asked, accepting the beverage he offered.
He laughed a little shyly and nodded.
"I didn't mean to start rumours about you and Hugo," he said. "To be honest, I didn't even realise that I had. I didn't think I'd said to anyone that mattered."
Charlie nodded.
"Let's draw a line under it," she suggested.
"Sounds good to me," Angelo agreed.
"Why did you nearly cancel on me?" Crystal asked.
The two women sat side by side, looking out at the sea together.
"Because everything got complicated," Joey said.
"Because you slept with Charlie yesterday?"
"I didn't sleep with her," Joey said quickly. "We just kissed a bit... a lot. It's... complicated."
"Because you still love her," the barmaid accused gently.
Joey sighed heavily and closed her eyes, not willing or able to say the words out loud.
"It's okay, Joey," Crystal said. "You can't just switch your feelings of just like that."
"I want to," Joey said. "But I guess Charlie stole my heart a long time ago. She gets into my head. She..."
Joey sighed and let a fistful of sand fall through her fingers.
"I'm sorry for being unfair to you," she said. "I really shouldn't have dragged you into all of this."
Crystal put her arm around her.
"It's okay," she said. "I mean, it's not like I was happy to take no for an answer. I really like you, if that isn't obvious enough by now!"
They both laughed self-consciously.
"And I demand that you look me up the moment you decide that you're over her," Crystal added. "Even if it takes a while!"
Charlie had finished her drink and said goodbye to Angelo, preparing for a slow walk home. She paused when she saw Joey and Crystal sitting together on the sand. With Crystal's arm around Joey's shoulders, they looked happy and intimate. Feeling sick and impulsive, Charlie spun round and headed right back the way she'd come.
"So, do you think you and Charlie will ever get back together?" Crystal asked.
Joey was about to leap into incensed denial but held herself back.
"I don't know," she said honestly. "A big part of me is desperate to give things another go. Every time I look at her, I just can't help being drawn in by how beautiful and perfect she is. I do love her. I love her more than I can stand. And she's put up with a hell of a lot of shit from me lately. And she's done it with unwavering devotion. Everything I throw at her, even stuff that I don't think is justified, she just takes and comes back for more."
Crystal nodded, touched that Joey was willing to open up to her.
"But then I think about what she did and I honestly don't know if I could ever trust her long enough to make things work," Joey admitted. "When I first met Charlie, I was more vulnerable than you could imagine. My whole world had been torn apart and I thought I was going to die from the pain I was in. Charlie was my hero. She saved me and she helped me put myself back together. But then she broke me apart again... just like that. How could she behave that way if she really loved me?"
"I don't know," Crystal said. "But that doesn't mean that she didn't love you. Have you... have you actually talked about any of it?"
"You've seen first hand what happens when Charlie and I try to talk!" Joey remarked.
Crystal chuckled and nodded.
"Yep," she agreed. "But maybe you should try harder. Maybe talking will help you figure things out one way or the other. I mean, I personally can't help but hope you'll decide she isn't worth it but at the same time, I care about you enough to accept that she might be."
Joey smiled and hugged her, thanking her for being so understanding.
"I've changed my mind," Charlie said, standing over Angelo at the table she had recently vacated.
He looked up in surprise.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"When you hit on me before, I turned you down," Charlie said, trying to keep the tears in. "Well, I'm changing my mind now."
Angelo stared at her.
"Well?" Charlie said urgently, wanting to get it over with before she changed her mind.
When Angelo continued to hesitate, she sat down, prompting him by saying his name.
"Why?" he finally asked.
"Just... well, just because."
"Because of Joey?"
This time, it was Charlie's turn to stare.
"What are you talking about?"
"She told me about you two," Angelo explained. "And I have to say that I'm surprised."
Charlie blanched, feeling even more unwell. She stammered a little.
"Are you in love with her?" he asked.
"I..."
"I'll take that as a yes," he said a little bitterly.
His ego hadn't been coping very well with the idea of his ex girlfriend switching teams.
"We... um..."
"I'd like nothing more than to take you back to my place and rekindle what we used to have but things are different now," Angelo said. "And if you fucked up a relationship with Joey by sleeping with Hugo then I'm not about to help you make it worse by sleeping with me... as much as I'd really like to."
Charlie stood and hurried out of the bar.
Having said goodbye to Crystal, Joey remained on the beach. Everything felt slightly surreal but she had come to a decision. She loved Charlie and she had to find out if there was still a chance for them, otherwise the pain and the heartache they were both enduring would hang over them forever.
"What the hell do you think you're playing at?" a voice demanded.
Joey spun round and stood up, coming face to face with Charlie, who looked furious.
"Excuse me?" Joey replied.
"Telling Angelo about me and you," Charlie said. "You know how much I've struggled with people gossiping about me and you wanted to make it worse?"
"Yeah, I know exactly how much you've struggled," Joey said bitterly.
Charlie glared at her.
"Has it become your life's mission or something to hurt me?" she asked.
"I'm not trying to hurt you..." Joey said honestly.
"Well, you are!" Charlie shouted. "How the hell did you think I'd feel seeing you out on a date with Crystal?"
"I didn't..." Joey faltered, struggling over what to say.
She wanted to tell her about the decision she'd reached. She wanted to tell her that she wanted to give things another go. She wanted to make everything right again.
"All this time I've just been waiting for you to forgive me and it's never going to happen, is it? You hate me that much that you'll watch me go through hell every day and enjoy it!"
"I don't," Joey protested.
"I love you," Charlie said desperately. "And I want to be with you. I want to be the person you need me to be. I want to go back and make everything right. I want to be perfect for you, Joey. But you're never going to let me, are you?"
"I..."
Charlie ploughed on, ignoring Joey's attempts to speak.
"So I'm out," she said. "Gossip about me, make my life difficult, swan around with your new girlfriend, rub my face in it... I don't care. Let's just live our lives pretending that we never happened."
Refusing to listen to anything Joey had to say, Charlie stormed off.
Next time... Ruby tells Charlie of her plan to sleep with Xavier and FINALLY Charlie and Joey begin to make some progress...