A/N: Before I forget let me thank my incredible betas: PisceanPal23 and CullenandSwan1993- you ladies rock my world! Secondly, I want to thank everyone who ever put this as an alert or favorite. You will never understand the giddiness I feel when I get that notice!
Lastly, please review..they are like candy for my soul. I respond to them and give a little teaser of the next chapter. I would love to hear what you are thinking; good, bad, ugly or beautiful. To those who have reviewed, THANK YOU! Your words are beyond amazing, I am humbled by what you are write. So, it is to all those who have reviewed so far I dedicate this next chapter. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own this wonderful world, only Ms. Meyer...but she let's me play with it!
The Madness within the Blackness
I no longer kept track of the passage of time; it held no meaning to me anymore. So how long I was floating in the quiet darkness, I am not sure. What I was aware of was that the darkness was broke up by moments of clarity; a vivid, stark reality. I started to look forward to and hate those times. It was then that she tormented me; in images and then with her voice. I could only be grateful that I did not have to smell her scent, which would have been too much.
I tried desperately to keep it all out, everything that had to do with her. But like always, she was not to be denied. I could never deny her what she wanted; even it meant to torment me. At first all that kept me company were the quick snapshots from Alice's visions. They re-played over and over, a never ending cycle of painful jabs at my shattered spirit.
FLASH! Bella, sitting on her bed, her arms curled around her legs, rocking back and forth.
FLASH! Bella, staring into space, eyes vacant.
FLASH! Bella sleeping restlessly, reaching out in her dreams.
FLASH! Bella at school, looking tired.
I held onto that last one, knowing that Bella somehow found the strength to move on, to rejoin her life. If she could do that, all of this was worth it. She could continue on, find happiness, and find someone to take care of her, have a normal, human life.
The other images were the reminders that in my need to keep her safe, I had hurt her. How bad I had hurt her, I was not sure. Were the images showing that she was grieving? If so, that was normal. In vain, I scrambled in my head for information I learned about the human grieving process. I had taken enough psychology classes in my existence. Depression was one; some of those images could be attributed to that, all normal. There was denial and anger, but I could not be sure if the images represented those. Lastly, acceptance, seeing the one with her in school had to be acceptance.
Sharp, searing pain ripped through me at the idea of her accepting the absence of me in her life. Although it was what I wanted, what I needed her to do, seeing the actual proof… It cut me to the bone. Suddenly, I was transported back to the woods. I did not want to be here, the memories too harsh.
You…don't…want me? Well that changes things. The memory was crystal clear. Her face betrayed nothing; it was filled with confusion and acceptance at my refusal of her. She believed me. She never understood the depth of my love for her. Did she never grasp the complete and utter need I had to be with her? Was the truth that I needed her with every breath she took and that she was my whole reason to be, not as evident as I thought?
Agony, deep and overwhelming, clawed at me, it reared higher and higher inside. I did not fight it, why should I? There was nothing for me to fight for anymore. The numbing blackness pulled at the edge of my mind, beckoning me to their quiet solace. Unable to rid my mind of Bella's disbelief in my love for her, I pulled the blackness over me like a blanket. Soon I was lost in its comforting emptiness.
There was never complete relief, even in the darkness of my mind. Everything was still present; the anguish, grief, crushing sadness and most of all- her. However, it floated along the edges, mocking me, creeping closer to only pull back. It was an ever present reminder that I could never escape my penitence.
Even her face hovered ceaselessly in my mind. Try as I might, I was unable to ignore her, and deep down I did not want to. This was all I had left and so I watched her, staring into the depths of her eyes. I saw many things there, but how much of it were real memories or just my imagination, I did not know. After a while I did not care and eventually, I welcomed it. If this was the only way to be with her, I would take it.
So often I went between reality and the darkness that it was impossible to tell the difference. The pain and acute agony never abated. There was just varying degrees of intensity. It could be that the more intense it was, I slipped into the darkness. But there were times in reality that I longed for the darkness. Instead, I lived each excruciating moment, where each breath was labored and ripped through the bleeding holes in my body.
You owe me an explanation.
Her words echoed inside my mind, in my every nerve ending. They caused me to focus and what I saw confused me. She was there with me, in the darkness. Her eyes were wide, open and loving. Not at all like the first time I heard her utter those words. That first time, when we were at the hospital, she was confused and upset. But now, she stared at me, as if waiting for me to answer.
Fear that I was losing my mind gave way to panic. I could not comprehend how or why she was there. At first I scrambled for a way to get away, but the darkness never let me run far, and every time I turned, there she was. Longing, exquisite and piercing, filled me. How I wanted to be with her, to talk to her one last time.
This is madness! She is not here. I screamed at myself. The rational part of me that held a tenuous grip on my sanity rebelled, knowing that it wasn't truly Bella. But the piece of my being that needed her in any way to continue existing latched on with all its might. In the end the latter won out.
I can't even begin to tell you why. But it all comes down to how much I love you. It was a feeble explanation, but I hoped it would suffice.
Her eyes turned anxious. Why did you even bother? She sounded confused, like she was struggling to understand my motives. So I brought up what I told her many months ago.
If leaving is the right thing to do, then I'll hurt myself to keep from hurting you, to keep you safe. Her face fell and I strained to hear her.
And you don't think I would do the same? The love I saw in her eyes was too much. I knew that even if she tried to leave, I would not let her. I am too selfish to watch her walk away. Unable to stand looking at her, with eyes not judging and only full of understanding, I ignored her. It was the only thing left to do.
After a short time, the darkness receded and reality took hold. For the first time, I was grateful to be free of the darkness. Although part of me relished hearing her voice, I was unable to answer her question. Not when it made me challenge all the decisions I made. I tried to get angry. Who did she think she was to try and object to what I had done? It was the one of the most painful things I ever had to do.
But, if I caused her pain and so much so that she would be unable to move on, was it worth it? The selfish side I had long buried reared its ugly head, added its own challenge, trying to plant a seed of doubt. Frustration roared off me and the walls of the cave, its echo crashing over me. I would not, could not go back on what I had done. Her life and happiness are worth any price, without a doubt.
Unable to escape to the darkness, for fear I would hear her, I focused on a steady drip of water falling into a small pool of water across the cave. With each drip I counted and held my focus to that task alone. I made it to 4,133 before I thought of Bella. To punish myself, I started counting all over again.
It went like that for some time, the mindless counting and the intense focus on that annoying drip of water. I was up over a million before my concentration slipped, but it wasn't on my part, it was her.
What? Are you not speaking to me? The fact that she changed her words slightly from the last time they were spoken was not lost on me, but the situations mirrored each other.
I should have been terrified that I could hear her without being in the dark, but I had no more energy to care. So I let myself get sucked in, it was easier than resisting her.
No. I did not know what else to say to her, but knowing I had too much to say all at the same time. Once again, I reached into the past to sum up what I felt.
I'm tired of trying to stay away. It was the plain and honest truth. If I was going insane, then let it happen. Why fight against the one way I could be with her? To me that seemed to be insanity. But I wanted it to be complete, I didn't want to only hear her voice, I wanted to see her. With an ease I did not know I had, I slipped back into the darkness.
There she waited for me. Her soft hair billowed around her, a tiny smile hinted at her lips and the best part; her deep, warm eyes. My eyes drank her up, looking at the gentle slope of her neck, her high cheekbones and lush lips.
Will you promise to explain everything to me? Leave it to her to ask for the one thing I wished she would wait for. Couldn't I just look at her and enjoy being back with her? But my Bella wanted to understand, she wanted answers. Did I have any in me to give? I feared that I didn't.
Scared she would leave me if I did not tell her something; I poured my heart out to her. I held back nothing, all the fear and anger for what happened at her birthday, the war inside me and how I just wanted her to be happy and live a normal, human life. I finally said out loud how much I love her and will always love her. I even begged her for forgiveness for leaving, imploring that one day she would understand why I did what I did. I told her how much I missed her.
She patiently watched me; her eyes were deep pools where I saw her misery, my misery. Don't be sad. I will be ok. The incredulous look on her face let me know she did not believe me, not in the least. Knowing that I was lying to her, all I could do was to shrug my shoulders.
We went back to staring at each other. It was enough for me, just to see her. It was more than I could ask for and more than I deserved. Many times my hand twitched towards her as an intense longing to touch her stole over me. It was a weird sensation. Part of my mind knew she was not real, just something my psyche conjured to help my shattered spirit cope with losing her. But the other part just did not care. Missing her as much as I was, I physically ached with the need to touch her.
I want to stay with you. The words were barely whispered, but I heard them. A small flicker burned inside me at hearing those words. Wanting her as much as I did, it was only too easy to rationalize to myself to let her to stay. I want you to stay as well, if you want. Even after all this time, it was still her choice. She smiled at me and sat down close to me.
Still with not much to say, we strolled through some our happier moments; the meadow being our first stop. We played the memories over and I tried to smile at her expression to me in the sun. I tried to conjure up the feel of her fingers, as she lightly traced the veins in my arms. All I could manage was a weak tingling feeling, but it was enough for now.
You were so beautiful in the sun. I was worried you would disappear on me. Her lips curved into a soft smile. I was afraid to take my eyes off you, for fear you would vanish into the air. A sweet laugh escaped from her as we both recalled one of our happier times.
I tried to join in the laughter with her, but I did not know how. I felt as if I had no capacity in my mind for laughter. So I told her my favorite part of what whole day. It's also when we told each other how much we cared for each other, that we loved each other. I felt the need for further confession. I still love you.
She was quiet, and I expected no less. Even in my mind she still had trouble believing that I loved her. I wanted to weep, but I had no energy left to expend.
Even though I knew the question was beyond silly, it was out before I could even think twice. I hope you are ok, that you are taking care of yourself. Unable to even look this Bella in the eyes, I stared at the dirt at her feet. I held my breath, waiting to hear her response.
The silence ticked by and I started to count the steady drip of that familiar drop of water. After counting to a few thousand, I could stand it no longer, I looked up at her. Instantly I regretted my words.
Her face was a mask of confusion and pain. She tried to hide it, but was highly unsuccessful. Her attempt at a smile looked more like a grimace and her eyes reflected her hurt. Slowly she reached her hands out to me, like she was beckoning me to come to her.
Wait!
Wait!
Her plea echoed against the cave walls and I was bombarded by hundreds of begging Bella's.
WAIT!
She continued to reach for me and I was rooted to where I sat. I had no power to pull her close even though I yearned to do so.
WAIT!
Her screech reverberated with such intensity, my entire body was shaking. There was no mistaking the pain in her cries. Frozen in fear or my own guilt, I could only stare helplessly as she begged me not to leave her.
Needing to do something, I closed my eyes and shook my head, hoping to break free of the darkness I slipped into so easily. I needed to escape. Once again, I wanted to run away from Bella.
No! No! I am so sorry, Bella. So very sorry I hurt you.
With a sudden lurch, I was pulled from the darkness and was aware that I had slumped over and was lying on the cold dirt floor of the cave. My breathing was labored with the anxiety of hearing and seeing Bella's pain. It would only be temporary, right? For humans, time heals all wounds, isn't that what I had heard countless times. It would be that way for Bella, it needed to be that way.
The lure to go back into the darkness was all consuming, just to be able to see her. But I was a coward. I could not face her, or the pain I saw in her eyes. I could not bear it if she started to fling accusations at me. I deserved it, but that did not mean I looked for it. The natural instinct for self preservation was too strong. So once again I went back to counting the stupid water drip.
Awareness of how much time had passed was lost on me. The light from the sun did not reach this far into the cave and I no longer tuned into my internal clock. But awareness of myself came in sputters. I would find myself muttering out loud as I counted and then I was lost. I was never pulled back into the darkness, I resisted with all that I had. My focus was so hyper conscious on that steady drip of water.
I had reached over ten-million drips when a murmur broke my concentration. That voice was familiar. Panic flooded my body, but all I could do was glance around me frantically. When I saw or heard nothing else, I continued with my incessant counting. Letting the soothing water lull me back to semi-awareness.
I'm…sorry…Edward.
This time I heard it, loud and clear even though it was the faintest of whispers. Automatically I closed my eyes, if I did not see her, if I did not look upon those soft brown eyes, she would go away. Please, please go away I chanted over and over under my breath, all the while never losing my count.
Tell me why you ran from me before.
Before I could even blink, I answered her. You know why. We spoke those same words that wondrous day at the meadow. Back then I ran because I did not want to hurt her, and she surprised me by creeping even closer to me. I ran now because I could not handle my own pain, because I was a coward. But I could not tell her that, I did not want to look weak.
I don't know how to be close to you. I don't know if I can. Truer words had never been spoken. I could no longer resist her; I was addicted to her like a fish is to water. She was more than just my brand of heroin; she was my personal life essence. Without her, I did not truly exist.
This is enough. With her words, what determination I held onto disintegrated into a pile of ash and I slipped away into the darkness. I was determined to never surface again.
This time the darkness was a place of refuge. No longer did we talk about the bad things, instead we talked about the good and we spent time just looking at each other. I could exist like this for eternity and it would be enough. I knew on a deeper level that she was not real, but it was all I had. This was some form of the woman I loved and I held on with all my desperation.
When we talked, I told her stories of me growing up, the ones I could remember. I talked about my mother and what my human life was like. Her eyes never left mine and it only encouraged me to keep talking. When all my human stories were done, she asked me about different days in history and what I experienced firsthand. It was peaceful, and I was surprised by that. I expected that feeling was lost to me for forever.
During one of our silent moments, I kept hearing strange sounds. It was like someone was trying to say something, but all I got was muffled words. Whoever was talking was a great distance away. Bella looked unconcerned about it, so I did not bother to pay close attention. But it continued, and every so often, I swore I heard my name.
Shaking my head, I focused back on Bella. I love you. Please stay. Her voice was pleading and anxious and I did not know why. I did not want to leave her, not again. I love you, too. I will stay right here. I don't want to go. She smiled, but it did not reach her eyes.
Then we both heard the voices, and in unison we turned towards the sound. They want you, they will make you leave. Small tears leaked from the corners of her eyes.
I promise, I will stay. No one will come and take me away. But I could tell instantly she did not believe me. The voices got steadily closer and I could make out strangled words.
He's here…close…time…left…
They made no sense, so I ignored them. I turned back to Bella, but she had begun to retreat away from me. I won't go. Please stay, Bella. Stay, for me. I reached for her and she reached out. We could not touch, but it was enough to know she reached for me. Slowly she edged closer to me. I breathed a sigh of relief. I could not survive if I was pulled from her again.
Edward? Can you hear me?
That I heard and Bella did as well. The voice sounded familiar. It pulled at some deep, forgotten memory. Part of me reacted to that voice, moved towards in on instinct. But one look at Bella's terrified face and I swatted the memory away. This is where I wanted to be, with her.
They are here now. I can't stay. Then ever so slowly, Bella's form started to shimmer around the edges, they became blurry, out of focus. Panic filled my body, she was leaving and I could not stop her. Reaching out to her in the vain hope that I could grab onto her and she would stay.
Don't go! Please, please stay with me! Bella!
But no matter how much I begged and pleaded, she was not staying. Her form began to fade, growing lighter and lighter, till she was nothing more than a wisp of smoke and then she was gone. Instantly, my body was wracked by tearless sobs. My body was shaking with the pure agonizing force of them. And I still begged for her to come back, my voice nothing more than a whisper.
Bella! Don't go, come back. I love you. Please, please come back. I am so sorry. On and on I went there was no stopping me and I did not want to.
"Shh, it's ok. I have you." The voice was next to me and I could feel something rubbing my back. But like a child, I rejected the voice; it was not what I wanted. I tried to shrug it away, but I did not have the energy to move.
"Bella? Is that you?" But I knew, deep in my gut, it was not her and bitter disappointment filled my mind.
"No, son, it's me, Carlisle." A flood of emotions at those simple words overwhelmed me; anger, sadness and most of all relief. Slowly my awareness of my surroundings came back. I felt the cold, hard floor of the cave; I was lying on my side, curled in a ball; Carlisle next to me, rubbing soothing circles on my back.
I opened my eyes and searched for where I sensed my father to be sitting. My eyes felt dry and my lids felt like sandpaper. I could sense another presence nearby and ever so slowly, I moved my head, searching for whoever else was there. Before I could ask who was there, I got my answer.
"It's me, Edward." Alice, she was there. Then the dam broke, the memories came rushing back; the fight I had with her, the physical incident I had with my siblings, the need to run and flee; the fact that I had broken everyone's heart. The sobs that had quieted by now came back in full force. Sensing my distress, Carlisle pulled me upright and tucked me closer to his side. His arms wrapped around me.
"It's ok. Let it all out. It's going to be ok." He kept at his murmurings, treating me just like a helpless child. But I wanted it; I needed something to hold me, to keep me from falling apart.
"Do you think he hunted at all?" Alice's question was aimed towards Carlisle. Even in my state of being, I could not miss the concern in her voice. I tried to tell her, to answer, but my mouth was completely dry, there was no saliva, no venom.
"No, I don't think he has. He feels lighter, looks thinner. Plus, look at where we found him, the floor is dry and the alga has grown around him. I think he just collapsed when he got here."
"What's wrong with him? Is he ok?" Alice tried to whisper the words, but I heard, the cave walls acting like an amplifier. So I was able to hear the panic and anxiety in her voice. I knew I should be concerned that I was worrying her and maybe everyone else, but I was too busy dealing with the bombardment of sights, sounds and emotions. I felt plugged up, fuzzy and it made me hurt. My outsides were sore and tight, my insides resembled jagged edges of glass.
I had lost my Bella all over again and I had no clue how to cope with that knowledge.
"I never truly studied psychology, but I do believe he has suffered a mental breakdown." I could no longer look at Carlisle; I did not want to hear as he discussed me with Alice. I sought out the never-ending water drip and focused as intently as I could. Unfortunately, I could not block out his words entirely.
"We both know how rare it is for us to experience true change and it is usually accomplished when we find a mate. We all saw Edward as he experienced that change. But, I believe that Edward encountered something even more, something the rest of us never did." Carlisle brushed a gentle hand through my hair as he continued.
"He had to become hyper aware of his surroundings, especially when he was with Bella. Suddenly he had to monitor his own movements, the pressure of his hand as he touched her, the way he kissed her. Every movement had to be carefully monitored. Then on top of everything else, he had to be aware of Bella's reactions, her heart rate, whether she was breathing, even if she had eaten. That took an extraordinary amount of focus and concentration on his part. He has had to worry and attend to things we have never thought of and he did it for so long, it was almost automatic." His voice dropped even lower, as if he was worried I would over hear. I tried desperately not to. "Now, that is all gone, I bet it felt as if he lost part of who he was."
The last few words were murmured very low, I was not sure if I heard him right, but I heard everything else, and he was so very right. My entire world revolved around Bella, how she was doing, making sure she was safe, and that I met her needs. She was my whole purpose, my very reason for existing. And she was just gone, even the one that I found in the dark recesses of my mind, all gone.
"So it should come to no surprise that his mind could not handle the trauma of such a devastating loss." The very idea that Carlisle understood my madness eased my pain, but only fractionally.
"What can we do to help him? He has been here over a month and I don't think he had any intention of leaving. I mean, he was thinking Bella was here with him." I wanted to get angry that Alice had no clue how real it was to me. But I also knew it was never real enough, no matter how much I desired it to be so. Bella was never truly here with me.
"He did no better at the house, either. How does one help a depressed vampire?" The tone of her words was resignation, like there was no hope for me. If my family stopped believing in me, there really was nothing left for me.
"I think our first priority should get him some blood. Do you think you can bring something here? A deer or an elk would be best, much easier on his stomach." Carlisle had slipped into full healer mode, his comfort zone.
"How many?"
"Let's start out with one and see how he handles it."
"I should be back shortly. I will call the others to tell them we found him." I saw Carlisle nod his head and Alice sped out of the cave. With all the talk about blood, I could not find myself feeling thirsty. The familiar ache in the back of my throat was missing. I felt dry, that was for sure, but nothing else. I moved my head slowly to glance at Carlisle, I tried to tell him how I was not hungry, but the words would not come.
Slowly he moved me off his lap and back onto the cave floor. "We should uncurl you, help get you moving. Let me help, you may find that things are a bit stiff." With all the practiced care of a physician, he slowly moved my hands which were wrapped tightly around my folded up legs. He was right; I found I had little capacity for controlled movement. I found I could wiggle my fingers, but needed his help in moving my larger muscle groups.
Throughout all this, I kept glancing at my father, looking for something, but not sure what and if I wanted to find it. If Carlisle noticed my furtive glances, he did not mention them. Instead he continued in his calming, bedside manner to help me get moving. In a manner of a few minutes, I was able to walk shakily on my own.
"I think, once you have fed, you will have much more control over your body." After watching me move by myself, he sank back down to the floor and looked at me expectantly.
Feeling uncomfortable with his gaze, I just kept moving, fearing what may happen in I sit back down.
"I know you are hurting son, we all know. What can I do to help? To see you in such agony…" His voice trailed, unable to find the words to convey how he felt. I tried to muster up concern over my father's distress. But I could find none.
"I just wonder if maybe you thought of going back?" If the walls of the cave did not echo, I may have missed those last few words. As it was, they bounced all around me and inside my mind. Go back….go back… The lure of those two simple words was immensely undeniable. To be able to see her, to hear her, to smell her; it filled me with such acute longing. Carlisle sensed my hesitancy and continued in a rush of words.
"You miss you and love her deeply. Why be apart? We would all protect her, she would be safe. You would be happy; our family would be whole once again. Why deny you the one thing that you love most in this world?" In that split second, I heard the thoughts that Carlisle had been guarding, or maybe they were the first unconscious thoughts I had heard in a long time. Whatever the reason, they were crystal clear to me. Did I do the right thing in agreeing to leave, maybe I should have insisted he think things through, helped him see reason. Wouldn't it be better if Bella was one of us?
"No!" I tried to shout it, but all I could manage was a fierce croak, my throat was completely parched. "No, Bella is staying human, that is why I left! Don't you see Carlisle? If I stayed, there would have been some accident where the only way to save her would be to change her. I would have begged you to save her because I could not lose her. I will not be the reason she loses her soul, I cannot have that on my conscious. She deserves so much more."
I sank suddenly to the ground, the energy it took for me to say all that while pacing furiously took what little energy I had left. My gaze captured his and I held it, I wanted him to see how much I need Bella to stay human. "All that is important to me is that Bella remains a human for the rest of her natural life. That is the only thing that is important to me, everything else I am unconcerned with." Let him think what he may of that statement, I was not taking it back. I meant it, every single word.
The surprised look on Carlisle's face showed that he understood the unspoken implications. My family, my life, my very sanity took a backseat to Bella and her humanity.
Before Carlisle could argue with me, we both heard as Alice entered the cave. From the smell of it she was carrying a small deer. I was proved right as she came around the corner and the deer was slung over her tiny shoulders.
"I hope this will do. Are you feeling thirsty?" She turned her amber eyes towards me. We will talk later. Until then, why don't you eat something? With that she unceremoniously dropped the deer at my feet. "Dinner is served." A smile attempted to reach my face; instead it came out as a slight turn of the corners of my mouth.
Even with the animal close at hand, I could not work up any amount of desire to drink. But with two pairs of very anxious eyes staring at me, I had no choice but to drink. Alice had managed to incapacitate the animal, which allowed its heart to continue to pump the blood. I pulled the neck of the animal up to my lips and bit down over the main artery.
Warm, thick blood poured into my mouth and down to my stomach. It helped with the parched feeling, but brought no other relief. Instead, I felt bloated and uncomfortable. I drank slowly and cautiously, I could hear Carlisle's thoughts that I not drink too much too soon. After a few minutes, the animal was drained dry. I pushed it away from me and Alice took it out of the cave.
"Do you feel better? Would you like Alice to get you another?" Carlisle showed nothing but concern for my welfare.
"I feel full; I don't think I could drink anymore. Maybe later on I could have some more." I kept my face neutral, as to not betray how uncomfortable I really felt. The small smile on his face let me know he believed my lie.
"Well, if you are feeling up to it, maybe we can head back to the house, slowly of course, so you don't tire." I did not want to go back; there was nothing there for me. What I wanted was some purpose to this life. But what that purpose may be, well, I had no clue.
But I knew that my father and sister wanted to go back home. They had mates that were waiting for them. There was no need for them to be here with me, but they were not leaving without me. With a terse nod, I agreed to go back.
All of us made our way out of the cave. Once out, I realized I had no real understanding of where I was. Looking back on my flight, I just ran. I paid no attention to where I was, or where I had been. I remembered nothing of my journey to the cave.
Seeing my disorientation, Carlisle offered encouragement," It's quite understandable that you may not know where you are. The fight or flight response is one of our more potent instincts and you were in full flight mode."
"It's why it took me so long to find you," chimed Alice. "I watched your progress the best I could when I was able to keep up. But you made no real choices, you acted on instinct alone."
I was curious as to how long they had been searching for me and when I questioned Carlisle, he brushed me off stating, "It does not matter. All we wanted was to find you safe. Why don't you follow me?" With that, he took off into the woods, running a gentle pace.
I made my attempt to follow, but Alice pulled me by my arm. "Let's hang back, we need to talk."
The look in her eyes told me, there was no getting out of this. I would have to let her have her say, no matter what it was about.
A/N: So we have seen Edward's lowest point, I don't want to fee that so...please review. You know you want a teaser!