Chapter 20

AN: Hi! I'm back from fireworks, barbecues, and watermelon! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. All the alerts, favorites, and reviews warm my heart and give me validation that I am doing a good job. I really appreciate it! That being said...this was one of my favorite chapters...

The next two weeks flew by for Penelope. She didn't think she could be happier. He was a playful lover—she giggled every time she thought about him wearing the silly, but arousing, pink penis ring—who was willing to try everything. He made lovemaking fun, and he was so complimentary and sweet to her. She had no doubt that he loved her.

The changes weren't just in bed, although that was a huge part of their relationship. It was the little things they'd done together. She'd always spent a lot of time with Derek—he was her best friend, after all—but now, it was even better. It was hard to explain the differences. They were really mild in nature, but they made all the difference in the world.

For instance, movie nights were so much better. Before, she'd show up at his place, or he'd show up at hers, they'd camp out on the couch with popcorn, he'd lay his head in her lap or she'd lay hers in his—they took turns on who got the coveted lap spot—or they'd spread pillows on the floor and then cuddle.

Then, when whatever movie they had chosen was over, she'd have to go home or he'd have to leave. She'd spent the night a few times at Derek's before, and vice versa. Derek had always insisted it was no trouble having her, and she certainly didn't mind having him. However, the underlying fact that she didn't really belong there—she'd been a guest in a guest room—had weighed on her.

Now, they'd watch a movie, and they'd head straight to his bed afterward—or during the movie, depending how hot and heavy their foreplay got. Sometimes, they'd cut to the chase and just watch a movie in bed together. They were both insatiable for each other.

That was just one of the tiny differences, a small thing, that made her wish she'd always been in love with Derek.

She sighed and took a sip of her coffee. Come to think of it, she had wished for that a long time ago and had blown it off as a pipe dream. It had been a fantasy to the ultimate end, a complete fairy tale, and Penelope'd had enough fairy tales crushed in her life to know that they didn't come true.

She was a realist. It wasn't every day someone like Derek Morgan—model sexy, traffic stopping sexy, wet dream inducing sexy—picked a girl like her. It wasn't every day that a man like Derek Morgan kissed a girl like her and caused fireworks and instant orgasms.

And it wasn't every day that someone like Derek Morgan said they loved someone like Penelope Garcia and meant it in a way that was so much more than friendship.

The issue wasn't with self-esteem. Penelope knew she could stop traffic, too, on good days, and truly believed she was beautiful. She knew she blew away all the other women in the tech sector and held her own with her gorgeous girls in the BAU. She knew she was sexy, funny, and had a great personality. She knew she deserved someone hotter and sexier than Kevin Lynch—she'd dated him because she loved his personality—but in her heart of hearts, she knew she wasn't Derek Morgan's caliber.

She was an actress; she knew what roles they'd be cast in. He was the perfect hero in the romance novel; she was the perfect heroine's witty best friend. He was Edward in Pretty Woman; she was Vivian's prostitute friend. He was Prince Charming; she was a stepsister.

Because of those doubts, she was having a really hard time dealing with their relationship and what it meant to him and to her. She tried to ignore it, but people and situations kept happening to solidify her thoughts. Just the other day, she'd found her heart racing and sinking after an incident...

"Come here, gorgeous," Derek said, wiggling his eyebrows while squeezing a cantaloupe at the grocery store. "Feel this perfectly ripe melon."

She had to hold in her laughter. Every moment was fun with him. Even something as mundane as grocery shopping was a chance for them to tease and flirt.

She grinned back saucily, and then turned away from him. "No...I think I want to play with the cucumbers instead."

He pulled her back to his front and growled against her ear, "Don't make me jealous of vegetables, woman..."

"Trust me, sweetie," she answered, turning and looping her arms around his neck, "no reason to be jealous...you're my perfect cool cucumber."

"Silly girl," he said as he grinned down at her. He was about to kiss her lips, when someone ran into him from behind, causing him to jolt against her. He scowled and turned; she could tell he was about to let the errant driver of the cart have it.

A little girl, shorter than the shopping cart handle, was driving the cart. "Sorry, mister!"

"Ashley!" a very pregnant woman, who had to be the little girl's mother, admonished. "How many times have I told you not to push the cart without my help?"

"It's okay, ma'am," Derek replied, bestowing his devastating grin on the mom. "She graciously apologized."

The mom pushed her hair away from her face and blushed under the beaming attention of Derek. "Oh...oh...thank you."

He extended his hand, and his grin, to Ashley. "We're good, right, Ashley?"

She shook it, and then hid in her mommy's skirt.

The mother smiled at him. "You're good with children. Do you have any of your own?"

"Not yet, but maybe someday," he said, still smiling warmly. He looped his arm around Penelope and gave her a squeeze.

It was only then the woman seemed to notice Penelope. At first, she looked surprised, and perhaps a bit disappointed, at seeing Penelope standing there. She smiled sheepishly, looking just a touch more embarrassed for ignoring Penelope and flirting with Derek, and then turned her attention back to Derek and said, "You'll make a great father someday."

"Ummm...Ashley is headed towards the watermelons," Penelope said, pointing towards the little girl pushing the cart again.

"Oh! Nice to meet you both," the harried mother said. "Ashley!"

Penelope laughed. "Poor lady. She already has her hands full with that one; what is she going to do when the other baby comes?"

"She'll make due," Derek said, pulling her into his arms and kissing the top of her head. "They always do."

Penelope sighed, melting into his embrace. "She's right; you will be a good dad."

He cupped her chin, making her look up at him. "And you will be an awesome mom..."

Penelope thought about it, her heart both warming and twisting, swelling and aching. There was no doubt Derek had meant that she would be an awesome mom to his children. She wanted that more than anything; she would love to share a child with him. It was her greatest heart's desire.

And yet...that woman hadn't even noticed her. She'd looked surprised, as if it strange to see her with someone like Derek. She probably hadn't even thought they were together until he'd placed his arm around her.

"What are you looking so dreamy about?" Rossi asked, coming into the conference room and sitting down.

"Nothing, really," she said, not wanting to share her thoughts. They were her own, and she needed to come to grips with them herself.

Rossi gave her a narrow eyed stare, one that told her he knew something was up, and then said, "Are you sure you don't want to talk?"

She hated profilers sometimes...

"It's not a big deal," she answered with a shrug, and then reached for the tablet PCs to upload the information the team would need.

He kept the knowing look, but answered her with, "Suit yourself."

She went back to her work, but it was a moot cause. Of course, now she couldn't stop thinking her problem and the world of questions that came into her mind. She looked up to see Dave studying his nails.

"Rossi?"

"Yes?" he answered, still looking at his hands.

She sighed, and then forced out what she wanted to ask. "Were you surprised to hear Morgan and I were dating?"

He chuckled. "Nooooooo. I don't think anyone in the BAU was at all surprised about that."

"I mean...not that...but..." She paused for a second. "Derek and me..."

She couldn't continue. It hurt too much to voice her fear that she had. She took a deep breath and swallowed hard. "When Derek and I...when..."

Dave put his hand on hers and squeezed. "Kitten...go ahead. Ask me."

She stared at their hands and let the words rush out. "Do you think it's odd someone like Derek is with someone like me?"

When she looked up again, Rossi was looking right at her with a soft expression on his face.

"Penelope, first of all, someone like Derek is very, very lucky to have someone like you."

"Thank you," she murmured softly.

"But first," he said, leaning a little closer, "I'd like to define that phrase."

She frowned a little. "What?"

"The phrase, Someone like you," he answered. "Someone like you is courageous, warm, kind. Someone like you is forgiving, thoughtful, beautiful. Someone like you...is someone I truly care about, because you truly care about me. It shows every day in all the things you do, Garcia.

"Penelope...one of the things Derek loves the most about you is what we all love; your strength in yourself, your individuality that makes you uniquely you. Don't let self-doubt take something beautiful, something meant to be, and twist it." A few tears slipped down her cheeks. He reached his hand up and brushed them away, and then held her hand again. "He deserves better than that, and just as importantly...you do, as well."

She reached over and held Rossi in a fierce embrace. "Thank you, Super Agent."

He chuckled and held her in return, and then patted her back. "Anytime, kitten."

"Rossi...are you making a move on my woman?" Derek asked suspiciously, walking into the room.

Penelope and Dave both laughed. He gave her one more squeeze before releasing her, and then turned to Derek.

"You're lucky I didn't decide to go for her," he drawled. "It would've taken me less than seven years to get my shit together, I can guarantee you that..."

He turned and winked at Penelope, while Derek sputtered in response.

"Hey!...I...man, I—"

"Okay, team," Hotch said, walking into the room, along with Reid, Prentiss, and Seaver. They all took their seats around the table, and Hotch looked at her. "Penelope, you can present."