Chapter Fifteen
Manwathiel slept horribly in the caves. She tossed and turned all night, devastated about Aragorn and annoyed with Eowyn who had the nerve to be upset when she had barely known him. Her sister deserved to be upset. Eowyn deserved to be mildly put out. All night she struggled to make sense of what had happened and it didn't help that the caves were not the most comfortable spot for sleeping. She was consumed with what her sister would say. Manwathiel knew her grief would be overwhelming. She kept playing Arwen's reaction over and over in her mind well into the early morning hours. Legolas and Gimli had stayed up with Theoden strategizing so Manwathiel had been alone when she needed Legolas the most. When morning finally came she left the crowded caves and wandered into the fortress where she saw Legolas and Gimli eating breakfast.
"Morning." She said, yawning and sitting down.
"Morning lass." Gimli said and handed her a plate of sausages. She took one gratefully.
"Did you sleep?" Legolas asked handing her water.
She shook her head and opened her mouth to speak when Gimli cried out. "By my beard. I never!" he jumped up.
Manwathiel followed his gaze. Her heart nearly stopped. It was Aragorn. He was alive. Somehow. He looked terrible but was walking across the keep to the great hall with purpose.
Legolas jumped up. "Aragorn!" he called. Aragorn spotted them and walked over. He looked deeply disturbed.
"You're late." Legolas said, smiling and reached into his pocket. He pulled out Arwen's necklace and put it in Aragorn's palm.
"Thank you." Aragorn said, bowing his head a ghost of a smile on his face.
Manwathiel threw her arms around him. "I'm so sorry I spoke to you in anger. I was wrong." She said, so grateful he was alive. He patted her back.
"You love your sister." He said. He leaned down and whispered conspiratorially in her ear. "So do I."
"I was wrong to doubt you." She said, nodding. Of course he loved Arwen.
"It is forgotten." He said. "Legolas, Gimli, come with me. We need to find Theoden." He said grimly. There was no more time to waste. Legolas and Gimli exchanged alarmed looks but got up to follow Aragorn.
"Can I have your eggs?" Manwathiel called after Legolas. He laughed and nodded, walking away.
"Ten thousand? Are you sure? How can half such a force be fought." Theoden said, sitting down heavily. He had maybe a thousand men. Eomer had taken the bulk of their army with him when he had been banished before they had arrived in Edoras.
"They will be here by nightfall." Aragorn said. "Everyone who can fight must be prepared."
Legolas listened feeling sick. Ten thousand. They were going to die. He thought of Manwathiel's smiling face eating eggs and felt gutted. He was a soldier. He was prepared to die. He was not prepared to have his wife die with him. His mother had died in battle. History was repeating itself. At least they had no children to orphan.
"Helm's Deep has never been breached." Theoden said stoutly. "The defenses will hold." He turned to one of his men. "See that every man and strong lad is prepared to fight."
Aragorn followed Theoden on a tour of defenses. Legolas felt cold with despair. "We should help in the armory." He said to Gimli as Eomer was urging men and boys forward to be outfitted. He saw Manwathiel sitting happily eating. She waved. He nodded back and stared at her for a moment. What was he going to say to her? His stomach churned. He couldn't even bring himself to smile at her. He always had a smile for her.
They worked in the armory for a couple of hours handing out chain mail and swords. Nothing fit. The men were old, many pudgy and the boys swam in their armor. Aragorn joined them.
"These are no soldiers." He said looking around. "Farmers, stableboys." He shook his head.
"They have seen too many winters." Gimli said.
"Or too few." Legolas replied, looking at a boy of maybe ten struggle to get a helmet on. "Look at them, they're frightened you can see it in their eyes." He paused and turned to Aragorn. "And they should be." He continued in elvish, now furious. "1000 against 10,000!"
"They have more hope of defending themselves here than at Edoras." Aragorn said.
"Aragorn. They cannot win this fight. They are going to die!" Legolas cried.
"Then I shall die as one of them." Aragorn cried back.
Legolas was shaking with anger. Aragorn may be willing to die but Legolas wasn't yet and he certainly wasn't willing for Manwathiel to die. He put his hand in his pocket and grabbed the rings. If they were going to die then he knew what he had to do. He owed her the truth. He couldn't have her die not knowing. He stormed from the room and out to the keep. He scanned the crowd and found Manwathiel healing a young boy who had tripped.
"I need to speak to you." He said urgently in elvish. She looked at him concerned by his tone but nodded. She finished with the boy and stood up. Legolas looked around. He was so frustrated. People milled about everywhere. They would get no privacy in this place. He would have to speak to her in the open in elvish. He wished he had told her at Lothlorien. At least they could have been alone. At least they could have been together. He had thought he was doing the right thing at the time. He led her to the wall and sat down. She sat down next to him and watched him expectantly. He took a couple of breaths to calm himself. He didn't want to do this. Not like this but he had no choice.
"I have not spoken to you of marriage." He started. He didn't have a speech planned. He had assumed he would worry about that when they got home. Now they weren't going home.
She nodded and wondered where this was going.
"There is a reason for that." He said. He took a deep breath and looked at his hands. This was hard.
"I assumed it was because we were running all over middle earth." She said, smiling at him. He didn't smile back.
He sighed. "In a way. I promised your father I would not tell you until certain conditions were met and by the time they were we were on this quest. I never wanted to tell you like this. I planned to tell you when we got home."
She looked at him confused and concerned. "Tell me what?"
"I haven't asked you to marry me because, well, because we are already married." He said, turning to look at her fully.
Her heart beat very fast. She wasn't sure she had heard correctly. "We are already married?" she repeated. "How is that possible?" her mind was racing. How could she have missed her own wedding?
"I've told you before that I was at your foretelling. Foretellings are just for family. I was there because I was in it. I was named as your husband." He said watching her carefully for her reaction.
"You specifically were named in my foretelling?" she asked. She didn't think she had ever heard of such a thing.
"Yes." He said.
"So it – we - this was predestined?" she asked her mind working furiously.
"Yes. In every future we are together." He said. "Once everyone realized it was a foregone conclusion it became clear we would marry. Both houses were present so father wanted the contract negotiated then."
"God forbid he make a second journey to Rivendell." Manwathiel muttered. "Who knows?" she asked, suddenly feeling very exposed. She couldn't even begin to process this information. She kept hearing the worried married over and over in her head. Had her whole life had been a lie? All those memories. All those years he had been her best friend. Was any of it real?
"My father, your father, your grandparents, Elladan, Elrohir, Nessa, Morwen, Arwen and Aragorn." He said.
She looked at him deeply hurt. "You told Aragorn before you told me?" she felt like she was going to cry. Everyone she cared about had known for a century before her. It was humiliating. All those decades she had carried on and on to Arwen about her crush on Legolas and she had just let her obsess over him knowing they were married the whole time. She felt so embarrassed and betrayed.
"No. No. No. No. I did not tell Aragorn. I have told only you. Arwen told Aragorn." Legolas said quickly, seeing the look on her face. Arwen had discussed this with Aragorn? Was there no end to this embarrassment? Had they laughed at her?
"Did the three of you discuss it?" she asked quietly. She could feel her cheeks burning.
"Sometimes." He admitted.
"I'm such a fool." She breathed. She couldn't believe this. She was picturing the three of them drinking and laughing at her silly crush.
He looked at her in surprise. "What? No you're not."
She sighed. "Legolas, you all knew about it. You all discussed it. You let me follow you around like a lost puppy which I'm sure Elladan got a real kick out of."
"No one made fun of you." He said seriously, putting his hand on her arm. "When it was discussed it was matter of factly. To your family I am just another in-law. It is not a joke or funny. Our marriage is just a fact of life to them. Sometimes it came up. And you didn't follow me around like a lost puppy. We spent time together. In fact for a couple of decades there I had to follow you around. You were always with your friends." He reminded her.
She felt a hundred things at once. She was of course happy to be married to him but was humiliated that she had been the last to know and angry that she had been told and not asked. She would never have a proposal, betrothal or a wedding. She would never have a wedding dress. That stung. So many firsts she would never have. So many firsts she had dreamed of having with him that would never be. She felt cheated. On the other hand she had him. Forever. And there would be other firsts. Millennia of firsts. There had already been firsts. He had kissed her and told her he loved her and that had been real she knew that with everything in her. Whatever had been true before she believed he loved her now and she knew she loved him. She felt so confused.
"No one consulted me." She whispered, trying not to cry.
He took her hand. "No one consulted me either. It was decided from the moment your grandmother performed the foretelling."
"But you at least knew! You kept it from me." She said, looking at him pained.
"You were a child and then I promised your father I would not tell you until I loved you as a husband. By the time that happened we were trying to destroy the ring. I have always loved you but not like this." He said. "We've had precious few moments together. I wanted to tell you when we could really be together and not just for a few minutes at a time."
This struck her as very odd immediately. "Why are you telling me now? We are the opposite of alone and we absolutely cannot be together right now."
He didn't answer her. She looked around at the chaos of men readying for battle and slowly understood. He would never keep it from her all this time only to tell her like this in the middle of a crowded, dirty fortress surrounded by strangers. His hand had been forced. He was telling her now because he couldn't tell her later. He had no other choice.
"We're going to die, aren't we?" she asked remembering the grim look on Aragorn's face. She surprised herself with how calm she sounded.
"A force of ten thousand is headed for us." He said quietly, looking at his hands. He wanted to tell her anything else. This was the opposite of what he had wanted for them.
She inhaled sharply. She had never been much of a student but she knew those odds were bad. Her anger and embarrassment disappeared. She was left with fear and sadness and love. "I wanted a wedding." She said softly after a moment, taking his hand.
He looked at her surprised. "I never knew you cared about having a wedding." He said. She had never played wedding as a child or married her dolls. She had never talked of weddings at all.
She shrugged. "I wanted to have wedding with you." She paused for a moment considering. "We could do a vow exchange." She offered.
He smiled and reached into his pocket. He pulled out the rings. "We can do one better."
"Have you been carrying those around since Rivendell?" she asked, shocked but also pleased. It was tangible proof that he had planned to tell her eventually.
"Mirkwood. I brought them to your coming of age. Father thought correctly I might need them."
She took the smaller ring, hers she assumed. It was delicate with gold interlaced into an intricate pattern. It was a shame she was going to die because it was a beautiful ring. She handed it back to him. "Do you want to go first?" she asked. She'd never gotten married before. She wasn't sure how to start. She was surprised by how nervous she felt.
He took her hand. "I bind and pledge myself to you for eternity, in life and in death. I name you Alasse." He put the ring on her hand. Her heart beat fast with happiness.
She took his hand and the ring from him. "Do you have a name?" he asked her. She laughed. He may have just developed feelings for her but she had been thinking about this for thirty years.
"Yes." She said.
"I bind and pledge myself to you for eternity, in life and in death. I name you Varno." She put the ring on his finger. He kissed her hard and forgetting all the people around them and she kissed him back.
"You should have stayed the night with me at Lothlorien." She said as he broke the kiss.
"That thought occurred to me too." He said wryly.
"You know if we live I'll probably be angry with you." She said.
He nodded. "I would expect as much. I assumed you'd be angry with me."
She put her head in her hands. "I can't believe everyone but me knew. It's so embarrassing. I ran away to Mirkwood and we were married and my father had to come get me. It's so bad."
He put his arm around her. "You were a child. No one judges you for having been 85 once."
"Did you get a dowry?" she asked, suddenly wondering about all the details she had missed out on.
He nodded. "Your father sent the last shipment thirty years ago. It was a fair contract. Father was pleased. He's pleased in general. It's a good match."
She rolled her eyes. Of course that was what Thranduil was worried about. Well her pedigree wouldn't be worth much when she was dead.
"So that's why you came every summer? she asked, thinking back on all the things that hadn't quite made sense. "You're not a family friend."
"Your father can't stand my father." Legolas said smiling. Manwathiel had no trouble whatsoever believing that. Thranduil's flamboyance alone would drive her father nuts. She had just never thought about it before. "They're friendly with each other for our sakes but no, I would not say before this I was a family friend. It was your grandmother's idea that I come every summer. She said it would better." Legolas said.
Now that they had only hours left together she agreed. Her grandmother had given her a hundred years. It was more than she could ask for.
"And that's why you always spent so much time with me?" she asked.
"Well I also happen to like and love you so I wanted to spend time with you." He said laughing. "Some of the tea parties were duty it's true but generally I enjoyed your company. I enjoy it more now than I did eighty years ago or even twenty years ago but I think that's appropriate."
She smiled. She had more questions. "And it's why I have a room at Mirkwood?" she asked.
He nodded. "Our room. If we live we will return there, not Rivendell."
"But we can visit?" she asked. She was anxious to see her family even if she was a little annoyed with them at the moment and now on top of everything else she wasn't even going home or rather her old home.
He nodded. "Of course. As often as you like. I love Rivendell."
She put her head on his shoulder. She would have only hours married to him before the battle started. "I wish we could be alone." She sighed as someone almost tripped over her.
"Me too." He said quietly taking her hand. He didn't reassure her because he had nothing reassuring to say.
They sat quietly talking as the sun moved across the sky. It was late afternoon when the men were getting into position. "I'm so sorry." He said kissing her. "I have to go. I don't know if I'll see you again before the battle. Stay behind the battle lines even if you need to heal someone. We don't have the numbers to give you cover and you can't fight and heal at the same time."
She wanted to cry. What if she never saw him again? "Should I go to the caves?" she asked.
"No you may be needed. Just stay inside the fortress walls. No matter what." He said. She nodded. They stood up. He pulled her close and hugged her tightly.
"I love you Alasse." He said using her new name. He kissed her. She touched his ring.
"Stay alive." She whispered. "I love you too."
He kissed her forehead and headed back to the great hall, leaving Manwathiel feeling very alone and scared.
Legolas found Aragorn and Gimli walking a few minutes later.
"Where have you been laddie?" Gimli asked, swimming in his chain mail.
Legolas held up his hand. "Getting married." He said with a small smile.
"Hey!" Aragorn cried and hugged him. "Congratulations." He grinned at Legolas.
"Knew it was coming sooner or later." Gimli said slapping him on the back. "The way you were going you were going to have to marry her." Legolas would explain to Gimli later if they lived.
"What names did you choose?" Aragorn asked.
"Names?" Gimli asked.
"Elves name their spouses." Aragorn explained. "It's a name they only use with each other."
"Alasse and Varno." Legolas said. Aragorn smiled.
"Fitting. Well chosen." He said. "He named her joyful and she named him protector." Aragorn said to Gimli.
"Aye those are good names." Gimli agreed. "Suits you both."
"I am sorry Aragorn." Legolas said, bowing his head. "I was wrong to despair. You have not led us astray yet."
Aragorn clapped him on the back. "I understand. I can only imagine how I would feel if Arwen were here. Is she going to the caves?"
Legolas shook his head. "She'll stay in the keep in case she's needed. Although I don't want her running into battle to heal if we can help it. We don't have the manpower. If possible we should bring the wounded to her."
Aragorn nodded. "If the defenses hold that should be easy enough."
Dusk was beginning to fall. They made their way to the outer walls when they heard a horn. "That is no orc horn!" Legolas said excited. He looked over the edge. Hundreds of elves were in formation waiting to be let in. Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas ran down the steps.
"Let them in!" Theoden called. Haldir marched in followed by his men. Haldir bowed to Theoden.
"I come from Elrond of Rivendell and Galadriel of Lothlorien. An alliance once existed between men and elves and we come to honor that alliance." Haldir said.
"You are most welcome." Theoden said happily. He turned to Aragorn. "Is this your doing?"
Aragorn shook his head.
"Haldir!" Manwathiel cried running forward. He bowed to her.
"My lady." He said.
Legolas suddenly felt hopeful. He had wanted to find Galadriel but Galadriel had found them. If they lived, Manwathiel was going home. He grinned. If they could make it through the night Gandalf would be back. Maybe they stood a chance after all. Legolas kissed Manwathiel one more time and followed the elves back up to the outer walls as everyone got in formation.
Manwathiel could see the men and elves in formation around the outer walls but not the fields themselves. As dark fell she heard the orcs. They were thunderous as they made their way toward Helm's Deep. Manwathiel felt her courage failing. The noise was overwhelming. All around her people looked nervous and scared. She had her bow just in case but she hoped she wouldn't need to use it. From where she was standing she could just see Legolas' head. He was near the front which made her very nervous. Right in the line of fire. She assumed Gimli was with him but he was too short for her to see.
For what seemed like too long the orcs screamed and the men and elves stood anxiously. Manwathiel had no idea how a battle was supposed to begin but she wondered how much longer they could go on just staring at each other. Suddenly an arrow was shot and arrows fired in return.
"Aim. Fire!" Aragorn shouted as elves raised their bows and let loose their arrows. Manwathiel watched as arrows sang through the sky. She saw two men fall. She wanted to run up to them but arrows were flying everywhere.
For an hour they exchanged arrows. Orcs lifted ladders to the fortress and they were cut down as quickly as possible. Eventually some orcs made it through and they were fighting with swords on the outer walls. Manwathiel watched with her breath caught in her throat. Then she saw Legolas, he was tearing through orcs with perfect concentration. One fell and he moved to the next one without hesitation. He switched from his knives to his bow and back again in fluid moments. He even seemed to be joking with Gimli as he did it.
She had seen him fight before, of course but she realized she had never seen him fight like this before. She appreciated she must have been distracting him this whole trip. She remembered all the times he had given her orders. He must have kept one eye on her in every fight they had been in. Because he seemed completely unleashed now. She had never seen him so completely focused. She felt a burst of pride. That was her husband and he was incredible. She turned the word husband over in her mind. Joy filled her. He was forever hers. She saw him fly through the air and take down two orcs at once.
"Healer!" a soldier called. She looked away from Legolas. They were bringing injured soldiers to her now. She rushed forward and got to work. She had healed dozens of arrow wounds and sword gashes when she heard Aragorn.
"Manwathiel!" he yelled. "Manwathiel!" she looked up. Aragorn was on the outer walls holding Haldir. She raced up the steps. "Quickly." Aragorn said, laying Haldir down. "I will give you cover."
Manwathiel smiled soothingly at Haldir and reached under his armor. The cut was deep and bleeding fast. "Hang in there." She said and shut her eyes. As she felt the light go into Haldir she heard Aragorn's sword clash all around her. It was a bad wound. It would take a moment. He would die without swift intervention.
"A few more moments." She said to Aragorn as he tore through the orcs around them. She closed her eyes and concentrated as much as she could, feeling the muscle knit together and the skin seal.
"I don't want her here." Legolas said, running toward them. "Get down to the keep!" He shot an orc in the head.
"There was no time." Aragorn said.
"I'm done. He will be fine." Manwathiel said and rebuckled his armor.
"Thank you my lady." Haldir said. She bowed her head to him.
"Get back down!" Legolas cried as a ladder of orcs landed near them. She raced back down the stairs. There were injured waiting for her. She worked tirelessly for hours as orcs swarmed the outer walls. She heard banging on the door to the keep as they tried to knock down the door. She finished the arrow wound she was healing and looked at the walls nervously. They were doing something with the drainage ditch. She moved as far away as possible as huge explosion was heard. Rocks and rubble went everywhere. They had blown through the bottom of the keep.
Manwathiel grabbed her bow and started shooting as she ran back towards the great hall.
"Retreat!" Aragorn was shouting.
"Retreat!" Theoden and Haldir repeated. The men scrambled from the outer walls to the inner walls, the orcs following them. Manwathiel was surrounded by orcs and injured. It was chaos. She dodged between orcs and tried to heal whoever she could. She had to stop halfway through a bleed and shoot an orc in the head and then continued on.
"Get back to the great hall." Aragorn said to her, as he led his men against the orcs. They were close to breaking through the door.
"The injured!" she said.
"They can wait. You're no use to them dead. Retreat to the great hall." Aragorn ordered. She took her bow and ran just as they broke through the gates.
The orcs had completely overcome Helm's Deep's defenses. It was near dawn and Aragorn had retreated back to the great hall with Theoden. They would make a last stand.
"Stay here." Legolas said as he mounted a horse and followed the remaining men out the door, into the keep and out to the battlefield.
Manwathiel had every intention of staying in the great hall when she heard thousands of hoofbeats. She ran out of the great hall, dodging through the orcs and injured up to the outer walls. Dawn was just breaking. She grinned. It was Gandalf. Gandalf stood atop the hill with thousands of Rohirrim. He shouted and the horses charged into the battlefield. She could see everything from this vantage point. She found Legolas and Gimli. They seemed to be having some sort of competition. She could just hear Legolas' laugh. Her heart lifted. Aragorn was fighting like mad next to Theoden. She recognized the soldier leading Gandalf's charge. It was the soldier that had given them three horses when they were looking for Merry and Pip. That must be Eomer she realized. She had mixed feelings about Eowyn but was happy for her. Her brother had come home. She felt a pang. She wished she could see her brothers. Elrohir in particular would be impressed with her. She watched for some minutes as the Rohirrim cut through the orcs, until she heard moaning behind her. She had to get to work, she had dallied too long.
While the battle raged on she tended to the injured in the fortress. There were still orcs about so she spent half her time using her bow and half her time healing. There had been hundreds laying on the battlefield and she was faced with at least a hundred within the fortress. She tried not to think of the mammoth task ahead of her. She ran from soldier to soldier, healing as quickly as she could. She had been trained to be thorough but there wasn't time. She had no sooner fixed one wound when she heard another cry for her.
Mid afternoon she felt a kiss on her cheek. She turned from the cut she was healing. It was Legolas. She threw her arms around him.
"It's over." He said picking her up and twirling her around. "They fled."
She gripped him tightly. "Please get a new job." She said.
He looked at her patient. "I will when you do." He said.
She smiled. "Fair enough. It's over?"
He kissed her. "It's over."
Her patient whimpered. "I can't right now. I'm sorry." She said and she genuinely was. She wanted nothing more than to just kiss Legolas but she had work to do.
He kissed her cheek. "I'll find you later." He said and left her with a sea of patients and only her limited experience and talent to help her. She saw people start to file out of the caves and soldiers were beginning to bring the injured in in droves. It was about to be chaos. It was time to go to work.