Itachi/Sakura/Deidara

I walked into the hospital in a horrible mood. First off, I didn't get much sleep last night thanks to nightmares from the new movie From Hell. I only watched it because Johnny Depp is in it! Second off, Haku took the week off to visit some family members and let his friends know he's still alive… jerk.

When I got inside Neji handed me a coffee and started going on about my schedule. I debated killing him with the clipboard he treated like the bible but decided not to. Too many cameras. My thoughts started drifting to how to get out of giving Pain my body in order to get away with such a murder when Deidara stood next to me.

"Where did you come from?" I asked blankly as he pats my head absently while looking around himself with a mischievous grin. I decided that this is not a good thing and tried to leave. Instead he grabbed me from around the waist and hurried me down the hall to the elevator.

He pressed the bottom floor but halfway there the door opened and Itachi walked in. He looked at Deidara then at me. Slowly he lifted my coffee out of hands and took out a random straw from his pocket. Opening it up, he then poked it into my coffee and handed the cup to me.

"Thanks." I grumbled still not in a good mood. It wasn't getting any better with this kidnapping. I slurped some of my coffee and then sighed and kicked Deidara so he was forced to set me down. I began to drink my coffee once again as he buckled over in pain. I guess I missed. I aimed for his thigh and hit his inner thigh instead.

"No one aims for the thigh." Itachi said with a slight smirk on his lips. I glanced over at him and nodded.

"You're right, I lied. I aimed for the nuts." I agreed and slurped some more of my drink. Itachi smiled and ruffled my hair a bit while I glared at the elevator. Instantly the door opened and we walked out. Deidara did as well except he crawled… in an odd way.

"Where are you two going?" Itachi asked softly as the blonde slowly picked himself up off of the ground and faced us with a look of dignity and respect. I almost kicked him again but Itachi stopped me. "I want an answer." He reminded me making me look down at the ground and kick a rock before taking another big sip of my drink.

"We're going to escape before Neji finds us and kills us, yeah." He explained making Itachi and I exchange glances until he took my hand and walked with me to the elevators once more. Deidara glared at the both of us and rushed forward in order to attempt at stopping our advance to the safety of doing what Neji says. I don't typically go against him so I don't know the full extent of his anger…

But what I've seen is terrifying so I'm fine with going back to my happy little life following his orders.

"Where's your sense of adventure, yeah? Be heroes and fight your way away from the claws of the man!" He shouted victoriously but we ignored him completely and continued on.

"Are you cold?" Itachi asked softly making me look up at him with big curious eyes. I nodded slightly making him dump his bulky jacket around my shoulders and lead me forward with an angry Deidara behind him.

"Why can't I ever get the girl to look at me like that?" Deidara asked and hugged me from behind. I looked back at him and sighed before kissing his cheek and pushing us all forward. I need to get back before my stupid secretary kills me.

"Just where do you think you're going?" Kisame asked curiously from behind us. We turned around to see him carting a huge aquarium with two large sharks inside into the parking area where the elevator was just in front of us.

"I'm going to work." I grumbled making Itachi nod while Deidara jumped forward in front of Kisame to announce exactly what he plans to do today.

"I'm going to fight the man, yeah!" He shouted happily making us all stare at him like the idiotic moron he is.

"You've been watching the hippie channel, haven't you?" Kisame asked shaking his head. I blinked in surprise. There's a hippie channel? I thought that was a myth, like the fountain of youth, Hogwarts, and laser eyed unicorns.

I guess not.

We all walked into the elevator silently but no one forgot about the fact that Deidara didn't answer the question, we just quit caring after Kisame showed up. When we got to my floor everyone got out and we were forced to see an extremely angry Neji waiting for us. I'm not used to seeing him this angry. It's interesting but odd at the same time. I laughed to myself and tried not to let him hear me.

"Do you think this is funny, Ms. Haruno?" He spat but I knew he wasn't upset with me as much as Deidara and Itachi. I blinked and looked back at Kisame to see he had gotten himself out of this by making a quick right to the nurse's station. If he hadn't then he'd be in as much trouble as the rest of us. Guilty or not I wanted him to be here with us.

"Do you have anything to say for yourselves?" Neji demanded angrily. I looked at him for a moment then coughed lightly before taking a step forward. I pointed at Deidara with a glare.

"It was all his fault." I informed everyone who could hear us. Deidara scowled and glared at me but I could see him shaking. I smiled softly then pat his shoulder. "Neji is the least of your troubles when Tsunade finds out."

Deidara fell to the ground and hit the cold floor with his fists. "That's NOT the man I want to fight, yeah…" He sighed dejectedly. I nodded sympathetically while Itachi tried to lead me away. Neji was already on his secretary phone ready to call the boss. I knew he was enjoying this much more than he should be.

The reception area was white with blue squares at the center of every four by four square of white. It was a boring room with people constantly on the phone and nurses walking around trying to figure out their jobs and what medicine goes to whom. It was a boring process but I knew they loved it, only because the Akatsuki hangout in this corridor every day.

"Let's stay here and watch him cry." I grinned punching the air happily as I began to bounce up and down. He rolled his eyes but I knew that he didn't care so much. Itachi is just as sadistic as I am at times which is a lovely thing might I add.

"I'll stay…" Itachi said in a soft tone. We stood there and watched at Deidara looked up at us angrily with little droplets of tears trailing down his cheeks. I smiled wider seeing that he was, in fact, crying.

"This is priceless! The man who is wanted in seventeen countries for his bombings is crying on the floor because my boss is going to come by and discipline him?" I asked making it sound as pathetic as possible. Even Pain would probably cry if he had to suffer the same fate as the blond. It's fun to pick on him though so I guess I'll continue.

"Wimp." Itachi said with a faint smile on his face. I looked up at the man beside me curiously. I wonder what his reaction would be in Tsunade decided to torment him for some reason or another. Knowing Itachi it was very likely that he wouldn't cry until he was getting punished… but I'm still curious.

"You have a job." Neji informed me dryly. I nodded slowly then knelt down beside Deidara.

"If you come with me while I'm working I'll take the punishment instead." I told him with a blank expression while I watched as life came back to his eyes. Deidara stood up swiftly taking me with him. I was enveloped into a tight hug that felt as though it would squeeze the life out of me.

"Be a man and take the punishment for her. Don't let a girl suffer for your idiocy." Neji growled sitting at his desk as he began my huge mountain of paperwork. Deidara said nothing only hugged me tightly and stuck his tongue out at him.

"She's tougher than almost all of the guys here! I can take the pain and humiliation but… if she offers she offers, yeah." The blond reasoned letting us all know that he was faking his bravery, if only because he was shaking against me.

"Sakura do your work." Neji said looking at his laptop pretending to be upset but I saw his blush. I smiled at him softly and nodded.

"Off to work!" I cheered and began to skip off to work.

Four hours later…

"You're not even halfway done, yeah…" Deidara muttered in a mix of horror and disbelief. I sighed and collapsed on the ground making both of the boys kneel beside me as I pouted and scowled at the floor.

"I don't want to work anymore." I grumbled and got up heading toward my office ready to eat some sweets made by Haku dearest. When I got to the office I noticed a couple letters on my desk. I asked my little chef if he could whip up some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies while I read.

I think Haku was as bored as we were because of how quickly he hopped to it with a grin on his face. The first letter was from Pain.

Sakura Haruno,

Please inform Deidara that I am the only 'man' he should be worried about. I can't wait to see you in a nurse uniform other than the boring doctor costume. Let me know when you want to switch to an easier job.

Pain.

P.S. Tsunade and I are working closely together now so it shouldn't be a problem.

I thought about the nurse outfit for a moment. It's not sexy at all so why would he? Instantly Deidara held up a picture of a pink nurse outfit that was the shortest thing I'd ever seen. Okay, so there's no way I'm going to be a nurse…

Cherry Blossom,

Please attempt to stay away from other men in order for us to have our dream come true. Deidara and Itachi may think they have a chance if you keep this up.

Sasori.

P.S. I like the nurse idea but maid would be sexier.

I nodded to myself thinking that Sasori's idea made more sense then tossed both letters into the shredder as Gaara attempted to enter. Itachi was holding it closed making it so there was no way the redhead could get in. I could have sworn I saw the black haired man smirk.

Dear Sakura-chan!

I missed you so much today! Hidan had to take me out to a candy store in order to pay back a debt he owed me but I promise to see you soon enough!

Tobi!

P.S. Don't worry… Deidara is as good as dead.

The blond paled at this but I ignored him completely and trashed it. I've gotten used to his threats towards the people who've been hanging out with me.

Dear Sakura,

Things have been a little rough with my sharks but they get to stay here at the hospital isn't that great! Oh and I took the liberty of getting rid of the blinds in your room and bathroom.

Kisame.

P.S. since everyone's writing a ps… uh well I guess I'll see you later then!

I laughed and put the letter in my desk drawer. We began to drink the hot cocoa and eat the cookies when someone jumped down into the room from above. Gaara had just broken through the floor of the level above us and was in the middle of my office.

"Cookie?" I asked as he read then shredded Kisame's letter. He took the cookie and ate it grudgingly off to the side. I laughed at this then quickly hid the rest. I'll just read them later…