A/N: Hi! I haven't disappeared. Just like the showrunners, this finale comes in two parts. It will be next week before I get the second part together. I have an Aug. 1st deadline that I plan to keep.

I got sick about a week ago, and found out I have an annoying infection called Diverticulitis which acts like the flu. I have antibiotics now, but I am still struggling with words sort of swimming around on the page. I think the second part of the finale will be something you'll find to be a respite from the somber nature of the story. Please tell me if you're still with me and what you think about this new twist. Sheila

Surviving Winter

Chapter 20

Gibbs and DiNozzo found Tim sitting alone outside of the courtroom the next morning. Gibbs nodded. "I thought you'd be in there."

Tim shrugged. "Nathan and Dad told me to show at 10 this morning. Dad said I needed the sleep. How about you? You already testified yesterday."

Tony sat next to him. "We're going to be right here when that verdict is read."

McGee nodded. "I thought it was a slam dunk, but they really let Winter off the hook. I guess maybe I should be worried now."

Gibbs sat down on the other side of him. "They'd never charged him with anything. Their only purview was to determine if his conduct was criminal. We weren't able to make enough connections for them. I doubt it will have any bearing on how they judge you. You had eyewitnesses, Tim. You'll be fine."

The courtroom doors opened, and Commander McGee came out, Abby following. Tim stood up. Abby hadn't been scheduled to testify. She was wearing a nicely cut black suit and a red silk blouse. Her hair was done, and she looked very beautiful. Behind her walked a group of young people. Tim stared at them for a moment and then his gut seized. Suddenly he was back in a hot dry room lying on a dirt floor trying to encourage a group of young Marines to hang on.

There were cries and shouts as they gathered around him, hugging him tightly. Gibbs laughed as he took hugs from those who remembered him from his hospital visit. In the midst of it, Timothy McGee burst into tears.

Startled, Tony moved to calm him, but Gibbs pulled him back. "Leave him be. A good warrior needs to cry sometimes. These are his combat buddies. They faced death together, and they're alive because they wouldn't give up. I think they've all earned a good sob."

By this time, all of McGee's Marines were crying as well. Gibbs wasn't ashamed when his eyes got teary or when Tony started rubbing at his eyes like a frustrated 6 year-old. Abby sobbed into Commander McGee's uniform while he stood there proudly, tears streaming down his face.

Tim finally composed himself. "What are you doing here? What could you possibly add to these proceedings? You're aware of what I did, right? You know I killed a Marine."

Corporal Miller nodded. "We've been fully briefed. We know that after the execution was staged, you were put back in the field. We know how badly you were injured. We know that you were denied access to medical care or contact with your family. We know that your friends and family were told that you were dead. We know that the Colonel had no real exit strategy than to make sure you did die. We know that you did the only thing you could do under the circumstances."

"Your father and your lawyer contacted us and asked us to come and recount exactly what happened to us during the attack, our imprisonment, and our escape. They wanted us to verify that you had no prior knowledge that there would be a faked execution," said Corporal Finch. As the only female, she was barely recognizable from the scared and dirty female Marine Tim had remembered in that hot stone room.

"It was our pleasure to come and tell them what we experienced. We wanted them to feel like fools for even suggesting that you set any of this up." Private Reiser still looked like he needed another year in high school.

"They wanted us to see the video of your fake beheading, but your dad, uh, Commander McGee stood up and formally protested." Miller added.

Tim looked at his dad. "Thanks Dad. No one should ever see that video."

Commander McGee nodded. "The panel is watching it now. Special Agent Brown from MTAC is walking them through it. After that, Brownie promised me that he would keep the only copy locked up. He said it would make it a hard copy so that no one could ever find in the NCIS information systems."

Tim rubbed at a stray tear. "I can't believe we really lived that."

Finch touched his arm. "You told us we could survive this and we did. Kept reminding us that we were Marines and Marines never give up."

Tim snuck a look at Gibbs. "I learned that from the best."

Gibbs blushed. Abby caught it and pointed and they all laughed.

Commander McGee opened the courtroom doors a bit and then turned to them. "They're done with the video. Just questioning Brownie. Nathan says we can sneak in to watch his summation. What do you say?"

As quietly as possible, they all filed in and took seats while Brownie answered questions. The panel was made up of three military judges. One of them asked Brownie. "Do you believe Special Agent McGee is capable of doctoring this video?"

Brownie gave the judge a look one might reserve for an ignorant child. "I do not."

"Why is that? You've testified that Special Agent McGee has a singular intelligence."

"I've watched that boy grow up at NCIS. He's brilliant and he's capable of many things, but McGee does not possess the kind of duplicity needed for such an act. He would have known that his boss and his team would see this video. McGee would never expose them to this. His commitment to his work and his team is complete. I've seen his teammate, DiNozzo, haze him unmercifully, but the minute anyone denigrates DiNozzo for any reason, McGee has his back. He would walk through fire for Gibbs and he would take a bullet for any of them."

"This is not evidence, Special Agent Brown." The judge admonished.

Brownie glared at him. "McGee's loyalty is complete. I have seen him under the most stressful of circumstances, and his character never wavers. It is not possible for him to be someone who would shoot a Marine under any but the most extenuating circumstances. If McGee says it was him or the Marine, I believe him, and you'll find no one who knows McGee to say any different!"

"Colonel Winter did." The judge said coolly.

Brownie slammed the table. "I watched every interaction Winter had with NCIS. Now, that's a man capable of a great deal of duplicity!"

The middle judge gaveled the room back to order. Gibbs put a hand on DiNozzo to keep him from standing up and echoing Brownie. The judge furrowed his brows at Brownie. "That will be enough, Special Agent. I think you have made your stance abundantly clear. You are excused."

…..

Fornell took a deep breath. There was a breathing technique he'd learned years ago when he was in couples therapy with Emily's mom. He cleared his mind of all other thoughts, and focused on what he admired and loved about her. Ziva David certainly wasn't his wife, but he needed something to keep him from spiraling down into a dangerous place.

Ziva stood in front of him, her hair pulled out of her ponytail comically. She had a black eye and a swollen jaw, and she grimaced every time she brushed the left side of her torso. Behind her was her vehicle loaded with captured Middle Eastern men. Amazingly, she had bagged three of them. Her reasoning was that one of them was undoubtedly Gul Baden Hussain, but as it was dark, it was hard to determine which one so she brought them all. Her hostages glared from the confines of the car, kicking at the sides with tied legs. Their faces were a mass of bruises. Maggie stood next to him, brown eyes wide.

Fornell expelled breath. "You're confused about what country you're in, correct? You thought maybe you were in Iran or Venezuela or other places where they have secret police."

"One of them is Hussain," she insisted.

"Ziva!" he tried again. "You've kidnapped foreign nationals without an arrest warrant!"

She shrugged. "You're Homeland Security. You'll fix it."

"Yes, thank you. I'd forgotten my role as the clean-up crew for NCIS."

"It's Hussain!" she insisted as if trying to train a small child.

"Sure. Maybe. Who knows? We can never prosecute them under the circumstances they're in now."

"You don't need to," she hissed. "Make him think we have something. Get him to trade for Winter."

His expression softened. She'd never been in it for the long haul. For her, Hussain was merely a means to an end. This was certainly not FBI thinking. At the agency, they liked to string out an investigation until the largest possible return could be achieved. While admirable in theory, it often meant that agents began to identify with criminals or ethics were bent as teams waited for bigger paydays. Ziva wanted none of that. She merely required that this man clear her McGee. The loyalty of Gibbs' crew never ceased to amaze him.

He gestured at Maggie. "Take Ziva down to Bethesda. I'm betting dollars to donuts that she's got a bad rib there."

"No!"

"Don't test me, you little terrorist!"

"What did you call me!"

"You're a one women wrecking crew! Now off you go!"

"But—"

He wagged a finger at her. "Behave! It's my ball now! Do what you're told. Maggie, take her to Bethesda!"

Maggie opened the car door for her. "Come on, Ziva. I want to hear everything. You have to teach me some moves."

Ziva smiled at her. "I hear you have moves as well."

Maggie blushed. "I was stupid."

"No, no," Ziva corrected her. "You were right to pull your gun on the plane. You must show them you are not afraid."

Fornell closed his eyes. "Maggie, ignore her! She has a head injury."

The enraged captives began kicking at the door again. Fornell rolled his eyes and picked up the phone. "Jethro?...they're convening? Good…Listen, I know you want to sit with McGee until they have a ruling, but I'm going to need your help. Your unsupervised Israeli went hunting last night. She kidnapped three men and is sure that one of them is Hussain…You think I told her to do that? She committed several class A felonies which I have to clean up and you think I wanted her to do that?... She learned this kind of shit from you, you know…bring that trained monkey of yours, DiNozzo. We're going to need some creative interrogation techniques…Meet you at NCIS…Oh, no, I'm not bringing this circus into my building…no way! You tell Vance!"

….

In the lobby of the Federal building, it was down to McGee and Abby sitting outside the courtroom. Gibbs and DiNozzo left in a hurry about 30 minutes earlier and Commander McGee went downstairs to do a conference call. Abby sat next to McGee closely and held his hand. "Finch and Miller want us to join them later. They're having a dinner at their hotel with some members of their platoon."

"I don't think so. If I'm convicted, it would be too awkward."

"But you're not going to be. It's going to be okay, Timmy."

Tim shifted so he could look her in the eye. "You don't understand. If I'm cleared, that's terrific, but a lot of things happened to me. I'm not the same person you knew. I don't sleep well. I feel angry. I feel confused. I don't know what I want anymore."

Abby bit her lip. "And that includes me?"

Tim searched her face. "No, Abby, you're the best thing that ever happened to me. I've wanted you since the day I first met you. Loved you for years."

She took his hand. "But I didn't understand it fully until those Marines explained it to me. I didn't understand that I was the one."

He smiled shyly. "I can't believe I never told you. After all I've been through, it amazes me that I never risked what was most important."

She touched his face. "You do love me, don't you?"

"Oh yeah, Abby. I still love you." He leaned into her touch.

"Then we can be together now. It's what I really want," she said.

He took her hand, kissing her palm before speaking. "I'm not sweet Timmy anymore. The person you loved isn't here anymore. I lost him somewhere in Afghanistan, and I don't think he's coming back."

She shook her head. "That's not true. I recognize everything about you. You've been hurt and you need time to heal and I understand that."

"I'm a mess. I look like McGee. I act like McGee, but I don't feel like the computer geek who jumps every time Boss says boo. I always thought that as long as I followed the rules, I'd be okay. I've spent years toeing the line. And then I end up in a situation where the only way I can survive is by breaking those rules. My world's upside down right now and I'm confused."

She pulled away. "You think I'm too fragile for what you're experiencing."

He sighed. "I think I'm too fragile. Honestly, if we started a relationship now, it would be a threesome. That bastard Winter is still in my head. I'm still trying to understand what happened, and what I could've done to stop it. As angry as I feel at him, the anger I feel inside at myself is deeper. How could I have been so stupid?"

No, Timmy. Don't do this." She reached up to hold his face again but he pulled away and stood up.

"I got to work through this before I'm any good to anybody. Do you understand this? Please tell me that you understand this."

Her chin trembled. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for what you're going through."

He rubbed at his face and looked at her with haunted eyes. "Please tell me that you understand."

She nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks. "You're not ready yet. I understand."

"Don't hate me, Abs. Please don't hate me."

She shook her head. "Never, Timmy. Never."

….

Gibbs looked at Gul Baden Hussain from behind the glass. "I wonder if he was actually there when they put McGee through the agony of a fake execution. I would love to see if McGee could ID him."

Tony grimaced. "You think we should do that to him?"

"He can take it, Tony."

"He can take it, sure, but he's had to take a lot of things lately. When does he get to catch a break?"

Gibbs stopped and looked at Tony. "You think he's not as steady as he looks?"

"I know him differently than you do, Boss. He's my friend. He doesn't have to impress me. He's putting on a show for you and his dad. He's being strong for Abby. He's being a brave little soldier all around, but he's been through too much, you know? Every time, I'm around him, I get the feeling he wants nothing more than to just fall apart, but he can't disappoint any of you. You're all so proud that he's held together through all this. He lives to please, for Gods' sake. You understand?"

"You don't want him anywhere near Hussain?"

Tony rubbed his face. "I tried to tell him Winter set this up this execution. He couldn't digest the idea in any form. I'm not sure he really has. I don't know. I feel really worried about this."

Gibbs nodded and stared at Hussain longer. "You're right, Tony. We don't put McGee anywhere near Hussain. You and I will go in there. And what you were talking about with Tim…I need to think about that. Maybe, we are pushing him to do too much too soon."

…

McGee stood in front of the tribunal waiting on their decision with his father on one side and Abby on the other. Prison would be the worst possible outcome, but the prospect didn't bother him as much as it should have.

Abby took his hand when the chief judge started speaking. He heard words, but didn't discern the meaning. Then his father clapped him on the back, and Nathan Shenandoah was shaking his hand. Tim smiled because he knew that it must be good. He turned to his dad. "So, I'm not going to prison, right?"

David McGee furrowed his brow. "No, son. You've been cleared of all culpability."

"Of course," McGee nodded. "I was just clarifying."

"You okay?"

Tim smiled. "Yeah, Dad. Everything…It's all better. I can go back to work and you can go home to Mom. We have our lives back, right?"

David watched him carefully. "I'd like to think so."

"Don't worry, Dad. You've been through so much. Think of how behind you are in your work. And Mom…however is she going to recover from all this? I need to find some time in a couple of months to take a long weekend just for her."

David stepped back, startling Abby and Shenandoah. "I've been through a lot? Your mom has been through a lot? Are you crazy, Timothy? Do you hear yourself? What about you, Tim?"

"I…was just talking to Abby about this. I need to work on my anger, and it'll take time. I'm going straight back to work. That's going to be my therapy.

David slumped into a chair. "You need help, son."

Tim froze. "Dad?"

"You didn't even know what the judge said. Did you even care?"

Tim backed up. "Calm down, Dad. I was distracted."

"Really? He's deciding your future and you're distracted?"

"Are you mad at me?"

David looked up at his son. "No, I'm worried about you."

Tim nodded. "But you don't have to be anymore, Dad. I'm going to be okay now."

David sighed. "I have to let you be a man, but I'm worried. I need to know that you're taking care of you."

In a move that too seldom happens between a father and a son, Tim leaned over and kissed his father on his head. "I promise, Dad."

David held onto Tim and nodded, not trusting himself to speak. Abby's eyes filled. "Hey guys! I was going to call them back at the office and tell them the good news, but I thought it would be nicer if we went over and told them in person."

"I don't know, Abs. It sounded like they were handling a crisis."

"Come on. They're waiting on pins and needles."

Tim looked at his dad. "Are you in?"

"No, you kids go. I have work to do back at the hotel. I'm going to have to go home in a couple of days.

"Come on, Timmy. Let's go put some smiles on some faces." Abby took his hand and pulled him away.

…..

Ziva showed up back at the office with a shining black eye and a swollen jaw, Agent Faust in tow. Maggie said impatiently. "I was specifically told to take you home by the doctor. You have a cracked rib. You need to be in bed."

Ziva brushed her away. "I've had cracked bones before, and I have gone straight back to work."

"Maybe when you had to, but I'm guessing that the guys got this covered."

Ziva narrowed her eyes. "I want to see Gibbs take Hussain apart bit by bit."

"Okay." Maggie sat at McGee's desk. She had enough of fierce Israelis for one day. "Go for it, Ziva." She mumbled at Ziva's retreating back.

A few minutes later, Abby appeared out of the elevator dragging a somewhat reluctant McGee. She spied Maggie. "Tim got off. He's completely exonerated. Isn't that great?"

Agent Faust smiled and stood up. "That's terrific, Agent McGee!"

"Where is everybody?" Abby exclaimed.

"They're down in interrogation, I believe. Ziva caught Hussain."

McGee cocked his head. "Who's that? I can't remember."

"Ah, it's the man that Agent Fornell and Ziva think kidnapped you and the Marines: the man who staged your fake execution."

"Why would he be in the U.S.?"

Maggie could sense that his confusion was tinged with something slightly off.

"I don't understand, Agent Faust." Tim insisted.

Even an excited Abby could sense the tension in him. "Let's find Gibbs. He'll explain everything to you."

Maggie watched them as Abby pushed a strangely reluctant McGee into the elevator. At the door to the observation room, he turned to Abby. "I need to see this alone, Abs. Can you let me do this?"

She hesitated. Suddenly, bringing McGee here to share his news seemed to be a very bad idea. "Let's go wait in the lab, Tim. I wasn't thinking. It's probably crowded in there."

He shook his head. "I got this. No problems. Give me a few minutes. I'll be fine."

She could see that he was digging in his heels. After he went in, Abby Scuito took off down the hallway in search of Ducky.

…..

McGee walked in quietly, careful not to disrupt Fornell and Ziva as they observed Tony and Gibbs double-teaming Hussain. Ziva sensed him first and whirled around. "Do you have news?" She whispered.

"I'm exonerated."

She hugged him tightly. "I'm so happy," she said softly into his ear.

Fornell turned. "Good news, kid?"

McGee nodded.

Tobias smiled. "Never doubted it for a moment. Come over here and look at this hump. Do you recognize him?"

Tim stood at the glass behind Fornell and looked at Hussain. The man was dressed in western clothes and clean-shaven. McGee wanted to turn to Fornell and tell him that he'd never seen this man before, but then a memory hit him in the gut. Hussain was interrogating him in front of a portable video camera. Every time, McGee would say something, Hussain or one of his men would hit or kick him. He looked at Tobias. "He had me executed. I remember him."

Tobias frowned. "He pretended to execute you."

Ziva put her hand lightly on his back. "You remember him."

He turned to her. "Did you ever wonder what your friend felt like before they took a blade to his neck? I can tell you what it's like."

Ziva stepped back in shock. "Oh, McGee."

Fornell shook his arm lightly. "McGee, it's okay. We got 'em. He's about ready to trade Winter for a reduced sentence. Winter did this to you."

McGee's breath had quickened and he gripped the edge of the mirror. "Would you ever…is there ever a reason…to do that to a person? I don't understand. Winter talks to me like…it was a…misunderstand…"

"It's wrong for him to be here!" Ziva tried to pull him away from the mirror.

Tim turned and threw the petite Ziva against the wall. She groaned loudly at the pain on her left side, but he didn't notice. "And then I stopped moving…I couldn't fight any…I just laid there and let them…I helped them kill me…I was…I don't understand…Who just lays there?"

Fornell tried to restrain him, but Tim got an arm free and slammed it into the mirror. The mirror shattered completely, revealing a stunned Gibbs and DiNozzo and a frightened Gul Baden Hussain.

McGee struggled to break free of Fornell. Instinct pushed him to try to straddle the mirror and rush Hussain. Gibbs opened the door and disappeared, re-appearing in the observation room and grabbing McGee from behind.

Tony reached through the shattered glass and worked to halt McGee's attempt to get into the room. All of the men had faced larger and stronger men, but nobody wanted to hurt McGee, and truthfully, the young man was showing strength that surprised all of them.

Gibbs wrenched McGee up, and let the young man fall on top of him as they both crashed to the ground. Then Gibbs had him in a bear hug and he started talking. "Stop fighting, Tim. Stop fighting. You're okay. Nobody's going to hurt you. You hear me, Son. I won't let anyone hurt you."

Gibbs' voice continued, repeating itself until McGee's breathing slowed. "What did I do? What did I do? Boss, what happened? I'm so sorry."

"Stop it, Tim. No more apologies. You shook up Hussain. It's exactly what we needed. Good work, McGee."

Tim looked around wildly. "I heard Ziva cry. Where's Ziva?"

She crawled over and smoothed the hair away from his face. "It's okay, my brother. It's okay. I'm okay."

Ducky was there then, stepping over bodies until he reached McGee. He quickly administered a sedative into Tim's arm.

Hussain regained his composure. "Who the fuck was that lunatic?"

DiNozzo turned to the man handcuffed to the chair. He cocked his head and walked over slowly. Then he took his foot and pushed, letting the chair topple over; savoring the sound as Hussain's face slammed into the floor.

…

"Nope! I'm not allowing it!" DiNozzo shook his head emphatically.

"Anthony! There's no other way!" Ducky insisted. "He'll be inpatient for a bit just like Abigail. He needs the rest!"

"It wouldn't make me better. It's not what Gibbs would do. It's not what Ziva would do. It's not how we get better on this team!"

"Why not?" Abby exclaimed. "It worked for me!"

"Because Tim doesn't just need a rest, people! He's not just recovering from a trauma! He needs to feel things and he needs to understand things about himself."

"Sounds like what happens in a hospital," Gibbs said softly.

Tony turned on him. "And how long did you stay in the hospital after your family was murdered?"

The room went quiet as Gibbs narrowed his eyes at Tony. "Tim is not me."

"How do you know? Maybe, he's on his way to becoming you. Did you ever think that? And who kept you from going over the edge?"

Gibbs blinked at the question. "It's not the same, Tony."

"Earlier today, you called him a warrior, Boss. Did you mean it? If you did, then you treat him like one! He wouldn't be alone, Boss. Not the way I have it planned."

"I don't know," Gibbs said simply. His hand was resting on McGee's shoulder. He hadn't let go since he tackled his youngest team member in the observation room. McGee was sedated, but there was still a panting quality to his breathing. "David McGee is never going to go for this."

"Nor will I!" Ducky declared. "You are not a clinician, Anthony and you don't know what's best for Timothy."

Tony stabbed his chest. "I am his best friend! I'll know him better than any doctor you find, Ducky!"

Ziva threw up her hands. "I don't know what any of you are talking about!"

"I'm kind of starting to like the idea," Gibbs murmured.

Oh Jethro! Not you too!" Ducky turned away.

Gibbs looked at Tony. "He'd never be alone?"

"I promise, Boss."

…

End Finale part I