I love fantasy football. Sometimes I accidentally call it Final Fantasy football. Whatevs. This is the shortest thing I've ever written. So this is what it means...this drabble thing.
Side note, I'm totally adding Small Fry Glee Time to the list of stories I need to continue. So, I have to finish Fuickleberry, Start a new story that is KILLING me in my brain cause its stuck there and wants OUT, do babyGlee kids story (aka Small Fry Glee Time), AND not get sidetracked by all the awesome prompts. Hah. Goodluck with that.
"This is the largest travesty to have ever occurred!"
"...Bigger than that Guy-liner dude not winning American Idol?"
"Noah, please, this trumps any other disaster that has ever occurred in the history of man!"
"So, you're saying this is worse than like, the Haiti Earthquakes?"
"Pffff...they had a celebrity telethon for that. I don't see Brad Pitt on my television wearing an awful hat begging for me to text him money! Therefore, this is so much worse. Infinitely so."
"But really, you remember when that fruity Aids show closed and you cried for a week in school? That was worse, right?"
"It'll be revived soon enough, with me starring as Maureen, so no, that's not a travesty. That's an inevitability. THIS, this right here on my computer screen is absolutely destructive. Do you even know what will happen to my team, Noah? Without DeSean Jackson this weekend, I'll lose at least twenty points. I'll LOSE. To Brittany. This cannot happen. Do you think that if I sent a get-well package to the training facilities in Pennsylvania that Mr. Jackson would have a speedy recovery and play this weekend regardless of the horrid concussion that ill-bred baboon inflicted upon him?"
"Uhm-"
"Or perhaps I should leave his healing to modern medicine, although I know nothing helps my headaches more than a soothing cup of caffeinated tea. I think that my energies would be better served in writing to those in charge of the National Football League, urging them to take proper corrective procedures to those few idiots that lead with their helmets and cause such irreparable damage to the shining stars of my stellar, undefeated Shining Star Fantastical football team! Help me look for a replacement for just this weekend. Although the pickings are slim and I can't quite find another name as dramatic and lyrical as DeSean Jackson. He has a capital letter in the middle of his name, Noah. It's a star statement. I'll never find a suitable understudy in time."
Puck grinned as Rachel poured over the listings of available players on their Glee Club fantasy football league. The girls had joined and while they had let the computer pick their teams, Brittany had chosen carefully based off of pages of calculations handed down to her from her older half-brother. Rachel had decided to make her choices based on the players whose names had called out to her.
Which is how she regularly scored fifty points more than each of the other Glee opponents she had faced. She had sent thank you cards each week to DeSean Jackson especially, as he had been her top point getter. She had sent a very impolite, Get Better Soon card to Tony Romo due to his total suckage, and she had gone as far as sending a fruit bouquet to the entire defense of the Minnesota Vikings for going above and beyond for her one week.
It was weird. And stupid. And completely wrong.
But also totally hot. He reached his hand out to trace a finger down his cheek and scoffed when she pushed his hand away.
"Focus Puckerman! I cannot lose to Brittany! I need another wide receiver!"
So hot.