AN – Thanks for the reviews. I've put a poll up to decide if this story should end BRUCAS or BRATHAN. I keep changing my mind so please vote! Enjoy Chapter 5. Lyrics are in bold italics and the song is Look after you by the Fray
"I forgot to say, you made the winning basket tonight. You're a state champion, was it worth it Nathan?"
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Lucas and Brooke were sat in the waiting room as the Doctors ran more tests on Nathan,
His heart beat was getting weaker.
"Luke, I can't lose him." Brooke whispered
"I know, he'll be ok, I promise." He wrapped his arm around her and she placed her head against his chest
"Don't promise things you can't control Luke, he could leave me now and I'll never get the chance to tell him how much I love him."
"You've been together for years, how come you've never told him?" Luke asked his curiosity getting the better of him
"I don't know. I guess I was afraid, I mean we both had absentee parents and he was all I had growing up.
I didn't want him to know how much I relied on him.
I didn't want him to leave me like my parents.
It was easier not to mention it.
And then time went by and he'd never said it either.
I didn't want him to know how much I cared if he didn't feel the same."
She was shocked at how much she'd opened up, there was something about Luke that just made her feel she could say anything and he'd understand
"I'm sure he knows Brooke." He gently rubbed her back and smiled
She smiled back and he could see her rebuilding the walls around her heart
He didn't mind though, he was just glad that for a brief moment she'd let him in
"Do you think you and Nate will ever be ok?" Brooke asked him, taking him off guard
"I don't know. I'd like to think so. I mean neither of us have anything to do with Dan anymore. But a lot has happened you know. It's hard."
She nodded
"He acts like he doesn't care, but deep down I think he still feels like a little boy wanting his dads approval."
"I still feel like that sometimes. Dan was never the father I needed or wanted but he's still my father and sometimes I wish he stepped up and became the person that he should be."
She took his hand into hers
"You know, the first time I met Nathan he became my best friend.
It was the first day of school, I was 5 years old and I was so scared.
I didn't know anybody and I walked into my class room and all the seats had been taken because I was late.
Victoria had got drunk the night before and hadn't woken up so I'd had to walk to school
And all the kids looked at me and Nathan stood up and pointed to the seat next to him
I walked over and sat down and I remember he took one look at me and said
'My name is Nathan Scott, and I think we're going to be friends forever.'
And just like that, he became my world.
Now he's lay in a hospital bed and I can't help but blame myself."
"Brooke it isn't your fault!
It was his choice not to get the medication, it was his choice, and nothing you could have done would change that.
Don't blame yourself."
She smiled as tears welled up in her eyes
The doctor walked over to them, and immediately Lucas could tell something was wrong
"Is everything ok with Nathan?" Brooke asked, trying to mask how much her hands were shaking
"I'm afraid not. His heart stopped beating twice during the tests we ran on him. We've managed to stabilise it, but it's very weak.
He's been put on a life support machine, but the chances of him waking up are getting slimmer.
We're going to have to operate on his heart.
Now, the chances of Mr Scott surviving the operation is about 1 in 10,
Without the operation he will not survive.
You might want to say your goodbyes."
Brooke felt tears sliding down her face as the Doctor walked away
Lucas pulled her into his embrace
"Luke, he can't leave me!"
She was sobbing now and Lucas didn't know what to say or do to make it ok
"Brooke, you need to stay strong. Why don't you go and sit with him and I'll call Keith and my mom?"
She nodded and tried to collect her composure
Walking into Nathans room she felt like she was dreaming
The boy she loved might not be here in a few hours,
She'd never hear his laugh again
Or feel his touch against her body.
She'd never feel her lips against his.
Tears started spilling from her eyes
"Natey, it's me. I have so much to say and not enough time to say it all.
I don't even know where to start!
If I don't say this now I will surely break
as I'm leaving the one I want to take
We've been together for so long now, and I've never told you how I really feel.
I need you so much Natey. That's all there is to it.
Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait
my heart has started to separate
I don't know what I'd do if you didn't make it through this!
Just come back to me Nate, just wake up and tell me that you'll make it through this!
Oh, be my baby
I'll look after you
Just open your eyes, or squeeze my hand, just show me that you can hear me.
Just smile that smile that gives me butterflies and tell me that everything is going to be ok.
There now, steady love, so few come and don't go
will you won't you, be the one I'll always know
You promised me that you'd always be here, that you'd never leave.
You promised Nathan!
When I'm losing my control, the city spins around
you're the only one who knows, you slow it down
Nathan, you're the only person I know that can make my heart flutter with just a smile.
The only one that can make my day better with a kiss, oh baby, I can't lose you!
Oh, be my baby
I'll look after you
And I'll look after you
You'll be okay, the Doctors they'll save you and we'll go home and everything will be fine.
You have to be ok!
It's always have and never hold
you've begun to feel like home
I can't forgive you for lying to me, Natey.
I don't think I can forget all that you've put me through all because you couldn't leave the game.
I relied on you so much and you've let me down, something you promised you would never do!
What's mine is yours to leave or take
what's mine is yours to make your own
I've given you everything I have Nathan.
I've given you my heart, and I don't think you can have it anymore.
This is the hardest goodbye I've ever had to make
But you promised me you'd never break my heart and you have.
So you can't have it anymore.
I hope you make through this I do, but me and you, we're over.
You'll never know how happy you made me,
And you Nathan Scott will always be my first love,
I love you."
Tears were streaming so fast down her face she couldn't see
It was the first and the last time she'd told Nathan Scott that she loved him and it broke her heart that he hadn't heard her
She gulped for air as she sobbed
"Goodbye Nathan Scott."
She stood up and walked out of his room
Feeling her heart shatter
She walked down the corridor trying to stop the tears from falling down her face
Lucas walked into Nathans room surprised that Brooke wasn't there
"Hey Nate, it's me.
Brooke's a mess and I know all she needs is for you to wake up and tell her that you love her.
You'll be okay, you're stronger than you realise.
Just come back to us Nate.
You don't know how many people need you.
Me, Brooke, Keith, the Team, Whitey
We all need you, so just open your eyes and make it all okay again.
I need my little brother."
XXX
AN So here's Chapter 5. Hope you enjoyed it! Please Review