Fangtasia Stories: The Wrath of Ravenscroft
Set during From Dead to Worse
"Pam!"
Eric called out for his child from behind his desk, and used his maker pull to drag her in more quickly. She soon appeared, mascara wand in hand.
"What's the rush? I hate when you do that, no matter what I'm doing I have to just stop and come to you. It is very annoying."
"I just got off the phone with Sandy. The king will be here tonight to visit Fangtasia."
"The king?" Pam became more alert. "What time?"
"Within the next hour. He has requested some items be made available for his visit."
Pam rolled her eyes and cocked her hip.
"What, like a rider? Who does he think he is, Mariah Carey?"
"I need you to find some yellow petunias, a red velvet cushion, and a dark-haired, olive skinned, curvy human female, aged 21-28, around 5 feet 5." He held up a piece of paper he'd scribbled some notes on, and quickly rolled off the rest. "And a grand piano and a footstool and one of those hairless cats."
Pam stepped forward and snatched the paper.
"Fucking fuck. How am I...? A piano?"
"He realizes this will cause disruption and wants the customers out of the bar tonight. Gather all our people."
"What? But the bar!"
"Just do it," Eric said with a sigh.
"He comes swanning in, taking over our state, killing our colleagues, and then expects the red carpet treatment?"
"He is our king now, Pam. Let's remember you took out some of his people, as well."
"Oh yes," Pam smiled. "Like those two I cornered around the back of Toys R Us. I taught those bitches not to fuck with Louisiana."
"Hmm, and the rest. How many was it that felt the wrath of Ravenscroft?"
"Twelve. I was a whirlwind of carnage." She spun around and did some fancy kung-fu moves. "Boom! Taste my pain, bitches." She roundhouse kicked a box full of Fangtasia mouse pads sitting on a shelf and got her heel stuck. It took her a while to extract it, and Eric just looked on, amused as she fumbled with her pump.
"Cardboard boxes everywhere are trembling with fear."
"Shut up," she snapped, slipping the shoe back on.
"You did very well during the takeover, and I'm exceedingly proud of you. But it would be best not to mention it around the king, or show off about it. In fact, you should probably suck up to him a bit."
Pam sighed and slouched, her arms hanging loose in front of her body.
"I don't want to."
"Gör det."
"Fine, fine, if it pleases you."
"Good." He gave her a warning glare. "You should know something else. I retrieved some memories last night."
Pam cocked her head.
"The memories?"
"The memories. Although it seems that some of the things that you told me happened were not restored." He narrowed his eyes and tapped his fingers on his desk. "Isn't that odd?"
Pam looked away, shifty-eyed.
"That is odd. Perhaps there are still some memories that you haven't recovered yet."
"Oh, I don't think so. I went over everything very carefully, in quite some detail. For some reason me taking harp lessons never came up, or me wearing a fluffy sweater with polar bears on it and hiding behind the sofa every time I saw Chow. Or me riding a donkey into battle."
"Shut up, you never believed all that anyway. It was just a bit of fun. So, you remember your time with Sookie." Pam raised her eyebrows and gave them a serious waggling. "Was it good?"
Eric shifted a little in his chair.
"Quite good, yes."
"I'll bet. Are you going to give me some details?"
"No."
"Go on. Spill the sex beans."
"Sex beans?"
"Tell me everything."
"Don't you think we have more pressing matters? I think you should be finding velvet cushions and hairless cats, don't you, Pam?"
Pam huffed and rolled her eyes, then looked at the list again.
"Yes, yes. I will go find these things, although I have no idea where to find a grand piano at this late time and at such short notice." She wandered out, and carried on mumbling all the way down the corridor. "And how will we even get it through the door? It's completely absurd."
Eric was not going to share his memories of those private moments with Sookie. They were for the two of them, alone.
He'd spent five nights at her house, that was all. But so much had happened in that time. They'd shared some very intimate moments, and three of those five nights he and Sookie had enjoyed some magnificent sex. His eyes went dreamy, and his fangs ran out. He leaned on his elbow, stared at the wall, and recalled that third night. Their shower, their first time together, how perfect it felt. Lying beside her, feeling warm and content and happy. Talking with her about their history. It all felt so easy and comfortable.
He was suddenly back in the moment, and he felt as if he could reach forward and touch her soft, bare skin, smell her perfect scent, taste her on his lips. The memory was so clear in his mind.
"I want to hear about today, but give me our background first. I find myself mightily interested."
Sookie raised an eyebrow, then smiled.
"You are the sheriff of Area Five, and my former boyfriend Bill is your subordinate. He's gone, out of the country. I think I told you about Bill."
"Your unfaithful former boyfriend? The one whose maker was the vampire Lorena?"
"That's the one. Anyway, when I met you at Fangtasia it was to try to get some information about some girls that had been killed. Bill took me, and we met and talked while I was there, only briefly. Then you got Bill to bring me back another time, you summoned me there to help you read the minds of your human staff, because some money'd gone missing at your club."
Eric stared at Sookie wide-eyed.
"I summoned you there?"
"You did, yeah. We kind of made a bargain, and I helped you. Turned out it wasn't a human who stole from you though, it was one of your vamp minions, Long Shadow."
"No."
Eric stared at her, his mouth open in shock, and Sookie smiled at him. He could tell she was happy to be sharing their history, and his oblivious reaction seemed to amuse her. He was eager for knowledge about himself, and if it involved Sookie, so much the better. Plus her stories were exciting, and he found the sound of her voice soothing.
"Yes. Would you believe it? Right under your nose, with your reputation? And when he realized I was onto him, he came at me! He was gonna kill me!"
Eric was even more amazed and distraught at this new revelation, and Sookie stroked his face lightly. Her touch made him relax immediately.
"But you staked him before he could do me any harm. Which, well, it was a nice thing to do, since I didn't really know you and I was just a human and all."
"I staked him?"
"You did."
Eric felt proud of himself. He'd protected her.
"Good. He should not have tried to hurt you, or steal. I am glad I did that. What else, lover?"
"Oh, wow. What else? Well, I got clawed by a maenad. I was in a real bad way, and you arranged for a special supe doctor, Dr. Ludwig, to help me. You helped get the poison out too. Then you sent me to Dallas to do some work, to help find a missing vampire, and we had some trouble there with the Fellowship of the Sun..."
"The fellow-what-of-the-what?"
"Fellowship of the Sun. They're religious nuts and they propagate vampire hatred. Real ugly people. Anyway, there was a bomb and you got me to suck a bullet out your chest."
"I did what?"
"Yeah, you sort of tricked me with that one. I thought you were gonna die, but you weren't really. You can be kind of sneaky sometimes. Anyhoo, let's see. Then you chaperoned me to this orgy, and the maenad turned up. She was a little crazy."
"Wait, go back. I chaperoned you to an orgy?"
"Yeah."
Eric shook his head.
"This is quite a story that you and I have."
"Hm-mm. It is a little weird, actually, and let's face it, none of this is getting any more normal, is it?"
Eric began running his fingers absently up and down her bare arm.
"What did we do at this orgy?" he said, his voice mischievous and seductive.
"Oh, it wasn't like that. I wasn't there to, well, you know, get it on with a bunch of folks while other people watched." She looked him in the eyes and shook her head. "I don't do things like that."
"Of course not," Eric said, with total sincerity.
"I was there to read people's minds, to find out who murdered my friend Lafayette. You were the only person I could trust to go with me and not be embarrassed and who'd stand up for me if things turned nasty. We might've done some kissing, as part of the act."
"Did you find out what you wanted to know? Did I help you?"
"Yeah, I found out all right. The whole thing was pretty awful, but you did good. You made sure nobody was getting their paws on me, and you made a totally convincing bi-curious horny vampire. Plus you look really good in pink Lycra."
Eric's eyebrows drew together in confusion.
"Pink what?"
"It's like a tight stretchy material. And, well, you're a big guy, and it stretched real tight. There wasn't much left to the imagination."
"You liked it?" Eric said with a smirk, twining their legs.
"I did. I wouldn't admit it at the time, but I liked it very much. I think you probably guessed I would. You seem to enjoy teasing me."
As if she was remembering just how much she'd enjoyed his outfit, she ran a hand over his shoulder, sighing as she felt the smooth, solid muscles beneath her palm, then ran it down his back and over his butt. A warm smile appeared at her lips, lighting up her face, and Eric laughed. He liked to be desired by her, and he liked the way her hands claimed him as her own.
"I should wear some more of this Lycra. Keep talking, lover. I enjoy the sound of your voice, and I long to know more."
"Well, then Bill went missing. He was working for the queen, and that's why you sent me to Jackson to look for him. The database thing he was working on was sort of important to the area. I mean, I wanted to find him too, I guess. You were there as well, some of the time."
"And that's where you got staked?"
"Yeah. In a Were bar, Club Dead. Well, it was actually called Josephine's, but that's what everyone knew it as, anyway. So we were there, you were sort of undercover, and then this Fellowship guy came in and pulled stake. I tackled him, and got injured in the process."
He hated the idea of this beautiful creature being harmed, and being in pain. He was also impressed at her bravery and strength. So human and vulnerable, yet so resilient and spirited. He inched closer, and ran a hand down her spine, before cupping her butt in his hand, squeezing gently.
"And then?"
"Then we went back to the king, Russell Edgington's mansion, and you stayed with me while they worked on the wound. Then, like I told you last night, you gave me your blood to help me heal so I could save Bill."
"From the vampire ho, Lorena."
"Hm-mm, that's right. And, um..." Sookie paused and looked away.
"What is it?" He stroked at her flushed cheek with the back of his finger. "Did something happen, Sookie?"
"We, er... well, you might've done something. We kissed, before I took your blood, and..."
"What? We have just had sex, you cannot be shy of me now. I'd like to know."
Sookie screwed her eyes up so she didn't have to look at him while she explained.
"When I woke up, you were in bed with me. We kissed, and you touched me, intimately."
Eric smiled. They'd been quite close before. Closer than he'd realized. Sookie opened one eye and stole a glance to check his reaction, and he kissed the tip of her nose. He ran his fingers lightly over her chest, down her body and between her thighs.
"Here?" he said huskily.
"Oh. Yeah, right about there." She giggled and pushed his arm away. "Let me tell the story first."
Eric grinned and refocused.
"Yes. Tell me more."
"Well, then Bubba turned up and we stopped before things went too far."
"Who?"
"Oh, yeah. I'd explain fully, but you probably still wouldn't know who Bubba was. He's a vamp. He moves around a lot, but he kind of helps out sometimes."
"Hmm. I don't like this Booba. And then you drank my blood?"
"Bubba. I did drink your blood, yeah, and it got you kind of excited. You know."
"Oh, I see. I think I do. Did you bite me?" He thought about when she'd nipped him in the shower. He nuzzled her neck and ear with his nose. "I like when you do that. You could do that again, perhaps."
He felt Sookie shiver, and rubbed himself against her a little.
"No, mm. No, I didn't. Eric." She pushed at him slightly with her hand while at the same time pulling his body in closer with her leg, and he laughed at her reluctant determination.
"I am attempting to remain focused. I seem to be easily distracted with you naked beside me. You are incredibly arousing, lover." He traced a finger down her side. "I find your body to be... stimulating, in the most wonderful way. In a very physical way."
Sookie gave him a coy yet rather sexy smile, and her eyes drifted lower.
"Oh yeah?"
He placed his lips against her ear.
"You make me ache with wanting you," he whispered. "I would like to pleasure you again. I am already thinking about the myriad of ways I might do that." He nipped at her lobe before pulling away. "But I want you to finish your story first."
Eric thought he heard her mutter something like 'fudge' under her breath, but he couldn't be sure. Sookie closed her eyes and took a moment to calm herself, before picking up where she left off.
"O-okay. So, um, then I saved Bill. You and I drove back from Jackson together, and we had this run in with some guys at a gas station. Then, oh, I don't know, I got real mad and decided I'd had it with vamps and their stupid politics, since I kept getting beat up and nearly killed and cheated on, and all."
"It has been hard on you," Eric said quietly, his face suddenly serious again.
"Yes, it has. Although I guess vamps aren't always to blame. You know what my New Year's resolution was? To not get beat up. I mean, who makes a resolution like that?"
He looked into Sookie's eyes and then linked his fingers with hers. He had an urge to protect her, to do anything he could to make sure she never got hurt again.
"You have been very brave."
"I've been very stupid."
"No. Not at all. This Bill person, I think he's been very stupid. I think I don't like him. That Bubba, he was the most stupid. I don't like that one, either. Perhaps I have been stupid too."
"Well, I don't know about that. I mean, you've kinda been there for me. When Long Shadow went for me, and when I needed to go to that awful orgy, you looked out for me." She smirked and looked at him out of the corner of her eye. "In your own inimitable way. And when I got staked at Club Dead, you stayed with me. You got my driveway re-graveled, too. I can't tell you how much I appreciated that."
It made Eric feel a little better to hear this. She seemed to trust him, and he had cared for her. But how could he not care for this beautiful, amazing woman? He would give her all the gravel she wanted. He would give her a mountain of gravel, if it made her happy.
"I think you have been leading a dangerous life, Sookie. I'm glad I've been around to help you when you needed it, although it sounds like I did not help keep you away from some of those situations in the first place. You have helped me, too. After all this, all your trouble with vampires, you still picked me up from the road."
Sookie sighed, and did her best to shrug in the position she was lying.
"I did. I like you, Eric. You're my friend, in a weird way, and you needed help."
"I think you are wonderful."
He truly did. He wanted to make her feel wonderful, too. She deserved to feel wonderful. He cupped a breast in his hand and brushed his thumb across the nipple. He teased her, flicking the tight bud, feeling it harden beneath his touch, and Sookie let out a sigh.
"So I guess that's it, in a nutshell," she breathed. "Our history."
Eric lowered his mouth and replaced his thumb with his lips. He swirled his tongue around her nipple, before sucking on the hard nub. He nipped a little with his teeth, then allowed his fangs to sink into her skin, and drew more strongly on the wounds.
"Ooh, Eric." His name left her lips in a whisper as soft as a snowflake, and he wanted to hear it again, and again, and again.
She let out perfect bleats of pleasure and raked her fingers through his hair. Her body shifted forward, and Eric took her behind the knee, hooking her leg over his hip. He let go of her breast and gave a couple of long licks to heal the wounds. Then he looked into her eyes, and slowly eased himself into her. Sookie let out a deep sigh, and pushed her hips forward to give him deeper penetration.
"I think perhaps we have wanted each other for some time," he said, thrusting gently. "But we never found the right moment."
"Things have just been a little... complicated."
"This is better," Eric whispered. "Doing this sounds much better than what we did before."
"Yeah. This is, well... Eric."
He lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her with a soft intensity. He kept up with his slow hip motion, each plunge a deep sweep of pleasure for the both of them. With one arm he cradled Sookie's head, bunching her hair in his hand and tugging gently, with his other free hand he sought out every inch of her soft, bare skin he could, trailing his fingertips up and down her spine, cupping and squeezing her breasts, kneading her hip, lifting her knee. She did the same, her hands gripping him with a pleasantly surprising firmness, her lips and tongue sweeping across any part of him they could, her teeth softly grazing his skin.
It was a sensory overload and he never wanted it to end.
But more than anything he longed to watch her come again. He slid his hand in between their bodies, and as he wound his hips in a way he could tell Sookie was enjoying a great deal, his fingers found her pleasure center. As she screwed her eyes up and moaned out with her pleasure, Eric nuzzled at her, encouraging her to open her eyes, to look at him. She did so, gripping him behind the neck with both hands, and they watched each other's pleasure build.
"Oh, yes, Eric. Yes."
Eric thrust harder and with an increased tempo, and with a final flick of his fingers against her slick nub, she came undone. He watched intently as her mouth opened, her eyelids flickered, and she let out the sweetest moans of pleasure he had ever heard.
He came straight after her, in a divine rush of intensity. Then he held her close against his body, enjoying her warmth and the feel of her hammering pulse against his chest.
"Mmm. Sookie." My Sookie. My lover.
She smiled up at him, with a faraway look in her eyes, as they held each other. She ran her forefinger over his cheek and across his lips. He opened his mouth for her, and as she put her fingertip inside, he gently bit down.
"Hey!"
Eric released it and sucked on the tip instead.
"Is that better?" he said, smiling sweetly.
She ran her finger over the point of a fang, and pressed up into it, until it drew blood.
"They're so sharp. How do you not bite yourself the whole time when they're out?"
Eric sucked on her finger again, before swirling his tongue around and releasing it.
"I have no idea. I was hoping you could tell me that."
"Eric."
"Yes."
"Eric, the king's here."
"Hmm?"
"Hello? Earth to Eric." Pam snapped her fingers in his face. "The new king. Here. Fangtasia. Now."
Eric sat up straight and wide-eyed.
"Shit." How long had he been in here recalling the memory? "Is everything ready?"
"Yes. His car just pulled up."
"Did you get all the things he wanted?"
"Er, yes. No. Yes."
"Which is it?"
"Yes."
"Well then, let's greet our new king. Give him a rip-roaring Fangtasia welcome, hmm?"
Eric stood.
"How do I look?" he asked.
Pam looked him up and down.
"Very excited to see him."
He looked down at himself, then let his head fall back and closed his eyes. He thought about Quinn and Bill in bikinis, making out in a kiddie pool. They began frolicking, splashing water on each other, and Bill's bikini top popped off and he coyly covered himself with his arms. Quinn began crawling towards him with a mischievous glint in his, frankly quite weird, purple eyes. Bill licked his lips seductively and dropped his hands.
"Oh, that's just..." he shook his head and opened his eyes. "Better?"
Pam looked down.
"Much. What were you just thinking about?"
"Believe me, you don't want to know. It's some seriously disturbed shit."
Eric strode out into the bar, and Pam followed him. The king was just entering, with his entourage in tow. This consisted of Victor Madden, Sandy Sechrest, and two other vamp minions.
He had a quick look around; all the Area Five vamps were there, and a few from the other, now sheriff-less areas of the state. There were yellow petunias on every table, great bouquets of them. Bill was sitting stiffly behind a Bontempi organ on a stand, and Pam gave him a nod as the king came in. He flicked a switch and a backing track started up that Eric guessed might be called 'bossa nova', and he began playing some horrifically upbeat, bouncy tune.
Eric gritted his teeth and knelt before his king, and his minions followed suit.
"Ah, sheriff! What a very special welcome! Rise, rise. All of you."
Eric kept his head lowered.
"Your majesty... I swear my alleg-"
"Yes, yes, I know. You have pledged your allegiance once, there is no need to do it again, Viking. Up." He gestured with his hands. "Up!"
Eric got to his feet and Bill started up on the organ again. Felipe glanced over and had a sort of confused look on his face, and Sandy and Victor, standing behind the king, were looking at each other with amused disgust.
"It seems there was a problem with the grand piano," Eric said, looking sideways in Pam's direction.
"Oh, this is no matter. I very much enjoy all music." Felipe's head whipped in Eric's direction, his eyes suddenly fierce. "Apart from the accordion. You do not like the accordion, do you, Eric?"
"No, your majesty. Absolutely not."
Felipe smiled, his handsome face suddenly warm again.
"Good! This is good, I think we will get along very well. Do you do requests, organ man?"
He wandered over to Bill, taking off his big leather gloves in the process, draping them over his forearm.
"Of course, your majesty," Bill answered, keeping his head lowered.
"How about Unbreak My Heart by Toni Braxton, that is very good. One of my favorites." Bill shook his head, completely blank. "Ricky Martin? Shake Your Bon Bon?"
"Um..."
"The Pussycat Dolls, then. No? Your repertoire is quite limited, I think." He turned. "Eric, your organ monkey man needs to learn more tunes. Sandy will prepare a list of my favorites."
"Yes majesty," Eric said, bowing his head, smirking slightly.
"So," Felipe said, striding around like he owned the place. Which, well, he sort of did now. "This is Fangtasia. I like it Eric. It is very nice. I am very pleased that you chose to stand down after we arrived, I think it showed great strength and wise."
Sandy stepped forward.
"Intelligence, your majesty, not wise."
Felipe was suddenly in front of her and slapped her across the face with his gloves.
"Do not correct me in front of my new subjects! I know what I mean. Eric here, he knows what I mean! Even monkey organ man over there, he knows what I mean!" He whipped his cape back over his shoulder to accentuate his displeasure, and began muttering in Spanish.
"Cerdo tonto."
Eric filed that little tidbit away for future reference. Do not correct king's English.
"Would you care for a drink, majesty?"
Felipe smiled. "Yes. And you minions, you can all stop staring and go about your business now. Thank you." Everyone started bowing and shuffling off. "Si. Very good. Very good bows, yes."
He went to sit down, and looked at the chair.
"Cushion?"
Indira slipped the cushion on the seat and stepped away. Felipe sat down.
"Footstool."
Thalia popped a small cushioned stool at his feet, and he rested his shiny, leather boots on it.
"Aah. Very nice. Hairless cat."
No one moved, and Eric looked around.
"Hairless cat," Felipe repeated, more slowly. Sandy and Victor looked at Eric and huffed. Maxwell Lee suddenly appeared, rushing through the doors, holding a cat carrier. He rested the box on a nearby table, flipped the latch, and pulled out a pale, miserable looking naked cat. He knelt and presented it to the king.
"Good." He looked away and waved his hand. "Put it away now. It's wrinkly, and it displeases me."
Pam came back with a hot-looking fang banger, all soft curves and pouty lips and hair tumbling down her back in long, dark waves. Just what Felipe had requested.
"Hmm. Excellent work, Eric." Felipe gestured to the seat opposite him, and Eric sat down. "I was right to keep you. I have heard many good things about you. You have quite a reputation."
Eric just nodded slightly.
"You are one of the oldest in the whole country, I believe. The things you must have seen," Felipe said, shaking his head. "The invention of the wheel, the peep-toe shoe, the pyramid, the snuggie, the battery operated fly swatter." He reeled the list off quickly, and Eric didn't even blink at the randomness of the items, or the fact that some of them were around long before he was. "All of the people that you have seen come and go during your long life. Napoleon Bonaparte, Ghengis Khan, Chaka Khan, Bobby Darin, Justin Beiber." He looked off into the distance with a far away look in his eyes, and he was staring so hard for so long that eventually Eric turned to have a look himself. He was just staring at the door to the men's restroom.
"Your majesty..."
"I am old myself," Felipe continued, snapping out of his trance. "But you, I admire your longevity greatly. Tell me, what is your secret, Eric?"
"To not get killed again, your highness."
Felipe smiled. "Oh, I'm sure it's much more than that. Perhaps even I will have something to learn from you. I think I will stay in Shreveport for a few days. I hear you know how to have a good time, and after all this takeover business, I think I should enjoy myself, no? We should celebrate, don't you think?"
"Of course, your majesty," Eric said, more somberly than he meant to. "It would be a great honor to host you."
He heard a little groan come from Pam's direction. He looked at the king, at those gleaming white teeth and the tiny, pointless bits of facial hair, and wondered what further tests of his patience and loyalty lay ahead. Bill started up his organ again, samba this time. Eric had to close his eyes and calm himself with fluffy kitten thoughts to refrain from going over and whacking monkey-man Compton around the head with the Bontempi.
"Well then let's party!" Felipe cheered. He got up and started a conga, Victor taking hold of his waist and beckoning with his hand to encourage the other vamps to join in. Eric wished more than ever that he could be back in Sookie's house, in bed with his lover, snuggling beneath the soft sheets, smiling as she made up embarrassing yet endearing alternative names for his penis.