Sam listened to Dean's footsteps circling the room for the hundredth time, and each time Dean came to a dead end there were curses. Sam ground his teeth together, trying to breathe through the invisible knife is his gut. "…found anything?" The words came out strained and quiet, and already Sam felt a little bit more breathless than he had before. Of course, he knew that Dean was doing his best to get Sam out of there. Dean always did. But couldn't he go a little faster?

There was grumbling coming as a reply from the other corner of the room. "No. Room's like a freaking tomb."

Sam winced at the choice of words. Tomb. The place was a tomb. It was going to be his tomb soon if he didn't get out of there soon. He looked upwards – which wasn't very hard considering that he was laying on his back – towards the tiny little window way up above his head. "…'ean…"

There was a shuffling of feet, and suddenly his brother was visible. "Yeah Sammy?"

He jerked his chin upwards, for lack of better words, and Dean saw the window. He swore again. "It's pretty high up… and small."

There was nothing to say, so Sam just kept his eyes on his brother and waited for some sort of epiphany. Dean was the smartest person he knew… He had to know some way to get them out of here.

Dean saw the look, and he bit his lip. The pressure was on. "I… uh… maybe I should take a look?"

Sam nodded, shifting his body – painfully – to the right, until his shoulder was up against the stones. Hopefully that would be enough room for Dean to stand on the slab, cause he couldn't give Dean any more than that. Sam took a slow breath, wincing at the tight pressure on his lungs, and got ready to speak. Somehow Dean beat him to the punch and read his mind, because a hand squeezed his wrist for a fraction of a second before letting go. "I got this, Sam." Dean put his hands carefully on the table, swung one leg at a time onto the hard surface and then crouched there for a minute like a cat ready to pounce. If Sam had actually been able to laugh without crying out in pain, he would have. But he knew that all the precaution and odd postures were so that Dean wouldn't step on his little brother. So Sam let it go.

Now, Dean stood slowly – it was a balancing act, on such a small surface area – and leaned to the left and rested his hand against the wall overtop of Sam. They both saw the dilemma here: Dean couldn't jump up and hang onto the window without the possibility of falling on Sam. He needed more room.

Sam put his feet up on the table, bending his knees and pulling himself down towards the end of it. Dean started mumbling something about having enough room and Sam shouldn't have to do that, but Sam wasn't really listening anyways because the pounding in his head drowned out most everything else. He let his knees come up to his chest, rolling onto his side and wrapping his arms around his legs. The movements brought on an odd feeling, like his insides had all shifted inside of him, and suddenly there was pain there. He wanted to vomit.

Maybe sensing this, Dean was on his hands and knees again, his hand on Sam's shoulder. "Whoa, Sammy. You okay there, kiddo?"

Kiddo? Sam wanted to laugh, but it would have hurt too much. Dean hadn't called him "kiddo" since… well he couldn't remember the last time Dean called him that. Had to be over ten years ago. At least. Make it twenty years ago. If Dean was calling Sam "kiddo," that mean that he was seriously freaked. How did Dean even know? Sam didn't remember making any noise… He hadn't moaned in pain, had he?

"…Sam?" Dean was kind of leaning over him now, one hand on the wall so he wouldn't fall off the slab under his feet. "Dude, answer me. Where does it hurt?"

He couldn't breathe. Sam went to talk, but the air wouldn't come. It was a sudden pressure on his chest, like someone had wrapped a jiant metal band around his lungs. He tried to push it, but nothing came out but a small choking noise.

"Sam?" Dean's eyebrows almost went into his hairline and he moved into action quickly, jumping off the table and pulling on Sam's shoulder. "Sam, you've got to breathe, okay?" He pulled Sam's weight towards him, rolling him on his back, and sort of hovering there not sure where to touch him, or if he should touch him. "Dude, you gotta breathe."

Sam tried to talk, tried to tell his brother that he couldn't breathe, except for the fact that he couldn't breathe. His chest was moving, but there was a weight on it that wouldn't leave and now there was something in his airways and he tasted blood and he couldn't breathe and he tasted blood and he couldn't breathe and –

Thud. Sam's head lifted off the table for a split second and impacted again hard as something jammed into his chest, sending pain shooting into his gut and up his spine.

Thud. His vision blurred for a second, but then he saw Dean leaning over him, his shoulder's tense and his arms on Sam's chest. He raised his shoulders for a second, and Sam was about to wonder what he was doing when he felt the impact again. The pain jarred again and his lungs ached but he still couldn't breathe, and the realization hit him that Dean was trying to do CPR. Dean lifted his shoulders again, straight arms holding folded fists under Sam's sternum, and then suddenly it came gain.

Thud. Dean's face went black, and suddenly everything was blurry.

"…dammit Sam don't you do this….just breathe, I know you can just….come on Sammy, please… don't you die on me…"

Thud. Sam's head lifted up again, but he didn't feel it hit the hard surface after that. He couldn't feel his body. He wanted to say something, to make some motion or even look at Dean in some way to let him know that no, he wasn't dying, but then it hit him that he was. He was dying and there was nothing he could do about it.

And death sure hurt like a bitch too, he noticed.

But he couldn't die! They still had to stop the apocalypse from happening. Sam still had to kill Lilith. What would happen if no one else could do it and he died? Would Lilith bring on the end of the world while he was rotting in the ground? And not only that, but Sam couldn't leave Dean alone. They were brothers. They had to be together. Not dying was like the number one rule in the Winchester rule-book. If Sam died, Dean would kill him. Or even worse, he'd go to heaven and dad would kill him.

"…'am, do you hear…"

Thud. But heaven couldn't be that bad, Sam realized almost calmly. That's why it was called Heaven, after all. It would be paradise. Mom, dad, Jess… Everyone he ever knew and loved there with him. There would be no sadness, or pain. No worries, no apocalypse, no Lilith or Alistair or seals or demon blood –

"I know what you did to that demon, Sam." Pamela's voice echoed in his head, and he could almost feel her dying breath against the side of his neck again. "I can feel what's inside of you. If you think you have good intentions, think again."

Or what if he wasn't going to heaven? Maybe God didn't want blood-sucking physic freaks up there. Had he screwed up his chances? Or maybe he was never supposed to go to heaven. Maybe he had been screwed since the day his mom made the deal with Azazel. Maybe he was going to hell.

Thud.

Dean was still there, pounding away on Sam's chest. Maybe he was still talking – Sam thought he saw Dean's lips moving – but everything was too blurry to tell, and frankly Sam couldn't hear a damn thing anymore. But the important part was that Dean was there. Dean, who had never ever left him his entire life. And Sam still hadn't told him the truth. He was still lying to Dean. Was this it? Was he going to die here, without telling Dean the truth?

"If you think you have good intentions, think again."

If Sam's lungs had held out a second longer, he would have noticed the first sob that escaped his brother's lips. And the next. And the next. But as it was, he missed them all. And everything went dark.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxx

Love me? Hate me? What do you think is going to happen next? How was my writing today, ladies and gentlemen? Tel me what you thought by hitting the REVIEW button below. I would L O V E to hear what you guys have to say, cause honestly, you rock. Period.

I will update as soon as I can. Sorry about the slow updates, but frankly it's hard to get the time in. I'm trying as hard as I can guys! I will update soon.