Author's Note: It took a while but I updated. I got an amazing idea for a new fic but I'm not sure if I should post it yet. Let's make a deal? 5 reviews or more on this chapter or this story overall at this point, and I'll continue. If there isn't much action soon, then I might delete it and post the other story because it's a really good idea and I think a lot of people would like it. But for now, enjoy this chapter. It's broken up into a lot of parts, but further chapters won't be like that - PROMISE - and these first few chapters are like an introduction. Mmkay. I'll shut up now. Enjoy & I hope this all makes sense, ha-ha. It's a tad bit confusing but at the beginning it's Josh and then it ends w/ Massie. So, yes, Joshie-Poo is dead in this story :( R.I.P

[ disclaimed ]

the middle name; josh emmet hotz isn't from the actual clique stories.

Massie Block taught Josh Hotz a lesson he'd never forget. She taught him that sometimes being afraid was a simple test of what scared you in truth. Josh Hotz never took it to his heart until he realized that being afraid was a test that he had been ignoring his whole life. So, what scared Josh Emmet Hotz?

Being in love, and dying. That scared him the most.

;;

He was speeding that night that he had chosen to end his existence. Drunk and speeding down the dirt road was when he decided that the game was over and he wasn't so scared of death anymore. He'd be throwing his soccer career in the trash and his flawless grades and reputation.

He'd be throwing away his relationship with Massie Block. Distant or not distant, something was going on between them and it was something that he couldn't shake. He couldn't shake it at Nikki Daltons' New Years Eve Blowout when the hostess herself had hit on him. He couldn't shake it when he was drowning down the wine glasses of White Diamond. He couldn't shake it when he was making out with Olivia Ryan in the coat closet trying to numb the pain of losing Massie. Letting her move away was the worst mistake of his life, and now with the leukemia spreading, he could lose her forever.

He could lose her forever.

Josh Hotz released his firm grip on the steering wheel and put the 2010 Lamborghini Murcielgo to a slow halt and relaxed his head against the wheel. Suicide wasn't the answer and death scared him too much.

So did being in love.

;;

Josh Hotz died on a Saturday morning.

The birds were chirping and grasshoppers' fresh with sound danced about their habitats. But something was wrong about nature. The aura of death was around them and it wilted like a dying rose.

Police and ambulance found his 2010 Lamborghini Murcielgo parked at the side of the highway with a gaping hole crashed at the side of it. Blood was splattered across the neon yellow décor and his body was found cold and lifeless.

He was under the influence of alcohol which was a fact noted once a few tests were run on the body. There was no point of testing on someone whose life couldn't be saved, but Jane Hotz just needed to know. Was her son as suicidal as she thought? Could she have saved him?

But she couldn't have saved him from what he was experiencing. Love was a bitter taste that was like Vodka burning through your throat and clawing its way through. It was what killed Josh Hotz.

He thought he could save her, and sweep her away so they could spend her last days together. But there relationship was more than meets the eye. Massie Block was dying but Josh Hotz was dead.

He never knew he was dying but he felt a stab through his heart as soon as the moment occurred.

Life wasn't fair. It never was. But death scared Josh Hotz more than life ever did, and now he was gone.

Josh Hotz died on a Saturday morning.

;;

"Good morning, Massie." Kendra Block crooned at the flutter of her daughters' amber eyes. "You look beautiful now that the cancer is dying down a bit." Her daughter on one hand looked beautiful and natural. Not one hint of make-up had crossed her face and she looked radiant as the sunlight poured in.

But Kendra Block on the other hand was a mess. Her blond-slash-brown hair was curtained across her face and sweat padded on her red cheeks. She had no sleep and dark bags graced her eyelids.

"Thanks," Massie replied. "What's on the agenda for today?" She questioned. Ever since Massie Block and Kendra reunited with her father – William Block – Massie had been turned into the face of what seemed to be a campaign creating a program for cancer patients.

Her father was nothing like Massie. Sure, a hint of resemblance was there but he was a rich, successful business man with a whole rewritten life. He had even made sure he told Massie that when she was established it was out of a few glasses of Vodka and a wild high school reunion. He was just telling her that she was a mistake he regretted. But she was sure he didn't regret the cash he was making out of her face being used for 'Catch a Falling Star' cancer awareness program that gave patients with severe cases a chance to 'catch-a-falling-star' and make a wish for anything within reason.

Despite the fact her case wasn't as bad, she worked great as the poster child which was milking loads of cash from charities and rich families from Westchester. She had barely agreed until William made a deal for a percentage of the cash to be donated to any chosen fund of hers. Her mother protested but Massie agreed on her own whim – also due to the fact her father was planning on paying the medical bills.

What did she have to lose?

"Your father has this charity ball in mind for us to attend that's coming up at the end of this summer. But I don't think it's appropriate for you to go in this condition. You're tired and weak and with Josh's death in mind, it's not proper." Kendra snapped.

Massie looked out the window perched on the white-and-blue plaid walls at the willow tree posed outside of the window. It was a relaxing scene of a park that children and their families would walk through. It was the perfect scene of life but it didn't calm her down one bit. "Josh Emmet Hotz is dead and there's nothing I can do." She paused. "I myself am dying and there is nothing I can do."

"Massie Jillian Block," Kendra suppressed a scream. "You're going to fight through this and win the battle. Did I mention my mother survived cancer and my sister as well?"

"Yes," She muttered. "I wouldn't ever leave you because I wanted to, mom. Death isn't a choice." She choked back a sigh as she thought of how it was considered Josh could've committed suicide. It was still unknown but the thought was a stab at the heart.

"The doctors said the condition is loosening now. I'm free to be discharged from the hospital soon. I heard it with my own ears. If the cancer comes back then give me time to live at least," She started. "Give me time to go back to school and meet people. Give me time to change a life, mom." The words came out faster than expected, and she regretted her next ones as she said them. "Give me time to fall in love, again."

But she knew the truth and she knew it well. Massie Block would never fall in love again.

fin.

[ the catch-a-falling-star is based on another program. but it's important to the story so yeah ;) ]

review, and be nice.