AN: I own nothing but my characters. This is belated wedding gift for my girl Tabs, I love ya! Lastly please leave a review.
-/-/-/-
You're thirty two and your very pregnant, extremely crazy wife has talked you into living in Paris for a year. She wants the baby to be a French citizen. You're pretty sure she's out of her mind.
You speak only very poor and broken French. You like the anonymity living in Paris has provided and the uniquely intimate experience of Chyler's pregnancy it's given you but the thought of the actual birthing of your child in a foreign country kind of freaks you out.
You return from your morning run to find Chyler standing in the doorway to the house. Clad in your hard knocks tee shirt and Tinkerbell pajamas. She's leaning into the door frame with her head down.
"Don't worry baby I swear I did a good job on your pedicure." you say with a grin. Pulling out your ear buds that blasts Luckenbach, Texas
"What do you think contractions feel like John?" she asks voice shaking
"You're not trying to find your feet?" You say swallowing a lump of tennis ball sized fear.
She looks up finally. "Nope. Trying to hold myself up. A little help?"
You rush forward. "Right. Totally. Sorry." you pick her up as though she weighs nothing and carry her into the kitchen. "I'm a cow and you can still pick me up that's nice." She says breathing shallowly through her nose.
"You're not a cow. You are beautiful." You sit her in a chair .
"You have to say that if you want to get laid again. You don't mean it."
"Do so! That one over?" you kneel in front of her glancing at the clock.
"Umm hmm." She nods.
"Good. We got this Chy no problem." you say with a wave of your hand.
"You're really calm. You can sit in a chair babe." you drag over a chair and sit so closely in front of her your knees are touching.
"The baby needs a name." she tells you, nails tapping a nervous rhythm on the table.
The two of you have had many conversations concerning this and can never agree. It turns out to be one of the few indicators of how different the two of you actually are. She wants something unique but still classic you want something simple. Having three names isn't the easiest you know that firsthand. You smile at her and brush the hair away from her eyes, tucking it behind her ear.
"True we don't want the little one ending up no name Cena."
She snickers a little and you feel better. You know she's just as freaked out as you are probably more, a human being has to come out of her tiny body. You want her to be as stress free as possible.
"So I've come up with a solution." She grabs your left hand, threading her fingers through yours she squeezes slightly.
"Tell me when you have another contraction."
"Will do." She still looking down distractedly at your joined hands. Eyes fixed on your wedding band. "What?" you ask.
"Nothing." She looks up at you a moment and you can't decide what the look of wonderment on her face means.
"It's just," She pauses chewing her bottom lip. "I got everything I ever wanted and I'm happy. So happy that sometimes I stop and think is this even real? Where's the catch?"
You laugh you can't stop yourself. The hormones tend to make her maudlin.
You stop laughing abruptly at the dirty look you are given.
"Pretty Baby, there's no catch we get be happy because we deserve it. We've earned it, and trust me this is completely and terrifyingly real." You answer placing your free hand at the top of her belly.
"You're scared too?"
"Out of my mind woman. Now want some breakfast?" you lean forward and kiss her softly on the mouth.
"Good I thought it was just me you're freakishly calm right now. Cinnamon toast sounds good."
"That I can do." you reply getting up and moving to the stove. "On the inside I'm totally flipping the fuck out." you grab the bread from the bread box. One thing about France that you love is the fresh bread.
"Any more contractions?" you ask looking over your shoulder
"You'll be the first to know Johnny."
"What was your solution to the name thing? And where's the butter?"
"Fridge door. Oh….I just….whoo…no stay there I'm fine. They don't last long but geeze…"
"And they aren't in a pattern yet?"
"No how long was that one?"
"Around twelve seconds and 25 minutes apart."
"Go back to your toast making handsome."
"I love you." you tell her because you feel guilty for the pain she's going through even if it's short lived at the moment.
"And I love you. The name thing right! I thought if it's a boy I'll name and if it's a girl you will."
"And do we have veto power?" you spread butter on the bread.
"Only if its something truly awful. Otherwise we trust the others judgment."
"In that case I veto Edgar ahead of time, I don't care how much you love Wuthering Heights Edgar is out."
"Even I'm not that obsessed." she says laughing loudly.
"Ok so I veto stripper names."
"Like?" you say just hassle her.
"Candi, Bambi, Tami, basically anything that ends with an I." You shrug while sugaring her toast. "Sounds fair. I'd like to use your maiden name for her middle."
"If it is in fact a her. You got something in mind?"
"No, not really I just always liked your name. It's a girl." you nod while adding the cinnamon and putting it under the broiler to cook faster.
"I can feel it in my bones." you finish your sentence.
"You sure that's not ring rust your feelin?"
"See that? That's just you being mean!" you point at her and she giggled as you plop back into your seat. "For that I oughta eat your toast."
"Do it and I promise you'll be taking a dirt nap." She smirks at you with that look in her eye. You know what's coming.
She grabs your shirt and kisses you deeply.
"You really need to stop playing Mafia Wars on Facebook babe." you tell her the words falling against her lips. You place your hand on the back of her neck to deepen the kiss yourself. You cup her cheek with the other. You are perfectly satisfied to fool around until the next contraction hits or the toast burns which ever comes first.
It turns out the former arrives on the scene first. She's sitting in your lap now so you feel her body both tense and freeze directly. It's more than a little frightening. Her breath flutters against your cheek when she exhales. You look up at her slightly to catch her eye.
"Okay?" You ask.
"I don't know what to do John. I've read all the books but I…it didn't prepare me I need help." you fish your cell phone out of your pocket and hit five.
"John what are you doing?"
"Calling my mother."
"John it's like three am in Boston!"
"So she won't- Hey Mom, Chy is having contractions but she's not sure of what she's feeling or if we should go to the clinic yet. Okay hang on I'll ask are the pains sharp, intense, just pressure?"
"Sharp. Really sharp."
"She says most definitely sharp. I don't know Mama. Because I didn't time it. Well we were making out. Okay we'll stop damn! I'll time the next one." you hold your hands in surrender even though he can't see you.
"Should we do anything else? Is it okay to eat breakfast?"
"She wants you to walk around until the contractions are regular." Chyler gives you a stricken look,
"Mom, she just looked at me like someone just ran over her puppy with a Mack truck. Okay, I'll hold you up babe it's the movement that helps. I know mom she's doing good I'm really proud of her. She says she wants to go natural, I might need the drugs instead. There that got a smile. Alright I will. We love you too Mom thanks. Bye.
"She says go ahead and eat because they might not let you eat at the clinic until after and to wait until the contractions are ten minutes apart and last a minute or more."
"Fifteen, we have to catch a cab.""Fifteen got it."
"Tell me I'm not going to die John. Tell me I can do this."
"You're doing it baby and I won't let you die." you kiss her forehead.
-/-/-/-
You're probably on the tenth lap around the kitchen and lower living area when she cries out and her knees buckle. Chyler's inner sailor man comes out with a "Shit! Holy fuck this goddamn hurts!"
"Breathe baby…" you rub her back.
"I need you to trust me on this Johnny screw the time I need the Clinic."
-/-/-/-
Once you finally flag down a cab, you get in to find the car smells like patchouli and you have managed to find the only Indian cab driver in all of Paris.
"Parlay vous Angleys?" you ask.
The guy shakes his head and mutters something neither of you understand.
Chyler shifts uncomfortably in the seat. "I don't speak Hindi John."
"Then try French!" you snap back.
"Don't yell at me!" She gripes
"Maternité Sainte-Félicité et rapide s'il vous plaît" she says fuildly in between contractions and thankfully the guy puts the car in gear.
"Sorry I yelled baby."
"Its okay. Just hold my hand." and so you do. it's a fair drive to the clinic, which is run by catholic nuns. In part that makes you feel better. You aren't overly religious but do believe the fact that your child will be born in a place of faith eases your mind.
Chyler squeezes your hand and breathes carefully through a contraction. She has her eyes closed and her head tilted back . "Did you remember the bag and Ipod?"
"Yes Pretty baby I got you covered I even remembered to load your birthing play list."
"Thanks."
-/-You arrive at the Clinic and mostly carry Chyler in. "Ma femme est active m'aider s'il vous plaît." you say clearly.
"I understood you perfectly baby, nice." Sure enough help rushes forward and you feel relived. Until they hand admittance papers totally in French.
You know first few just by looking at them. Name, age, doctor, but it gets more in depth "Chyler!" She's sitting in the wheelchair now. "Yeah babe,""What is in cass de de cees?" you say sounding it out "In the event of death, they want to know who to call if I kick the bucket."
"You are not funny Chyler."
"I'm sorry baby, I'll fill it all out?" "How you can barely breathe.""I can between…Can you cuss in front of a nun? You're the good catholic boy…ohh…sh…" you catch the nun pushing the wheelchair say follow me and so you do."
"I think blaspheming in front of nuns is frowned upon.""Then I'm gonna need the option to break your hand." you offer her your hand. "Chyler you can get an epidural no one will care and I won't tell anyone."
"I can do it…I just holy crap…" you step in front of the chair the nun shoots you a dirty look. You squat down. "Deep breath baby, you are doing so good."
"I'm hot."
"Damn straight."
"No John an actual hot flash." you use the paper work as a fan.
She's finally in a room and the nurses are speaking rapid French and poking Chyler with needles. You feel panic starting to rise.
"I can't understand anything you all are saying and you stop poking at my wife what is that shit?" you end the sentence nearly on a yell. Chyler catches your eye and doesn't look away as she speaks in calm French to the nurse.
The nurse turns after smiling somewhat placatingly at Chyler.
"We're sorry we weren't aware of your language barrier we'll speak English from now on. And this is…" She holds up a fluid filled bag. "Is just fluids."
"Okay. Sorry."
"Not a problem."
The nurses check her dilation. "You're at a five Madam Cena. That's good progress."
"We should keep the family in the loop. Call one of your brothers"
"Sean's almost more excited than us he won't care if we wake him up." you dial him up.
"Sean hey bro, Chy's in active labor, a five how'd you? Okay that's a tad disturbing….Sure hang on let her get situated." once Chyler was sitting comfortably he handed over the phone. "Hey! Yeah, no I'm fine oh it hurts like hell but- Yeah we thought you'd like to be our news spreader. Ow fuck!" you rush forward and grab her hand. "Remember we get a baby at the end of it…"
"Right, we get a baby…rub my back?"
"Yeah, I'll let you go before I start cussing in French or something…Love you too! Bye."
There is a lot of breathing and Chyler making high pitched pained noises that only dogs can hear. You lay along the edge of the bed, rubbing her back and keeping quiet. She's already yelled at you for singing along with your Ipod. You know she's trying so hard to keep it together. To remain calm and centered but she's failing despite the effort.
"I want to go home, John. I don't want do this anymore." She whines you smile and kiss her cheek. "You can't." you move the sweat dampened locks of hair off her neck. "Cause no way am I delivering our baby. You are almost there babe, just hang on a tad longer."
She huffs a tiny laugh. You kiss her cheek.
-/-/-/-
Five hours later and she's in the midst of pushing. You' ve been coaching calmly in a quiet voice. "one…two…three… four…Harder baby you can do it." she grunts and breaths out. " no keeping going…" She starts again but shoots you a nasty look. "Again…one…two…"
"I can see the head Chyler come on push Darling…" The doctors says.
You move down from Chyler's head to peek. It's both incredibly gross and cool at the same time. "Ohh my god baby!" you laugh gleefully for some odd reason "It's right there. Push!"
"Does it have hair?" she asks gasping and red faced. "Yeah lots of it." Chyler's hand tightens in yours and it all becomes completely real your going to be a father within the next five minutes.
Two kind of frightening pushes later the baby is free of Chyler's body. "it's a girl." the doctor says
The doctor jostles a cry from her and lays the pink and messy baby on Chyler's chest. You check her out momentarily mesmerized. She is in fact glaringly obviously a girl. You get to name her. She has Chyler's nose and your chin. She has curly hair at least it looks curly under all that yuck. She gets that from you. Your's is curly if you let it grow out. Your touching her tiny hand when Chyler touches your cheek. She wipes away a tear knocking you from your reverie.
You look down. She's smiling brightly with tear filled eyes. "We…we did that." you say in awe. Leaning down to kiss her. You want to kiss the baby but can't find a clean spot.
They had you the scissors to cut the cord and you are suddenly seized by fear.
"You won't hurt her sir, just cut between the clamps." a nurse says. You do and she's free. And the nurses carry her off to be cleaned and weighed.
You follow stopping half way. You turn back to Chyler. "Wait, I love you."
"I know. I'll be okay go. Besides you don't wanna see the next part." she scrunches her face and shakes her head.
-/-/-/-
You stand at the incubator station with your cell phone snapping pictures of your screaming but perfect baby girl and sending them to family and friends. With the message "I'm in love with my girls."
You get texts back immediately.
Randy O.: Welcome to the club man, Rocks doesn't it…"
Mom: She's beautiful…send more. How much does she weigh? Length? Her name? love you. I'm so proud.
Dad: Congrats son. Kiss Chy for me…and nameless baby. See you in two weeks she's gorgeous.
Sean: How's Chy? She's so tiny and pretty."
Matt: You cry dude? My niece is beautiful.
Dan: Oh she looks like Chyler! Thank god you'd make an ugly girl. LOL! Love you man congrats, Carly says she's going to sneak her home from Paris in her carry on.
Steve: She's beautiful. You faint? How's the wife?
They tell you numbers in the metric system. You are lost. "Seven pounds twelve ounces twenty inches long Johnny." Chyler answers. You promptly text your mother back with the info and "I'm still working on the name." Chyler's mother calls and you give her the phone. Knowing she loves you but really wants to talk to only Chy.
-/-/-/-
Chyler's fed the baby and they are both sleeping. You pick up your daughter…wow that sounds weird even mentally. You look her over, lingering on her chubby face.
"I think you look like a Tatum. What do you think? The girl groans her sleep you take that as an okay. You nudge Chyler. She jerks awake. "Everything's fine. Tatum Grey Cena?"
"Tatum Grey, Hm, I like it."
They fall back asleep. You see the hospital stationery and think why not.
-/-/-/-
Chyler wakes alone. Well not entirely alone the baby is sleeping in the little bassinet on wheels next to her. There is a letter addressed to Chyler and "Tater." sitting on the bedside table. Chyler rolls her eyes. "Sorry about the unfortunate nickname baby girl." She opens it and begins to read. Placing her free hand on the baby's chest. "Okay. Still breathing I feel better." She begins reading.
"Hey my ladies, I was sitting here watching you two sleep and thought to myself I want them to have something tangible to keep from this day so I'm writing this.
I know Chyler and I will never forget this day but still. I want the both of you to know two things. How much I truly do love you and how grateful I am to have you. When I asked for your mother's hand in marriage Tatum, I told her father there wasn't a whole lot in this world that I was truly good at but I can do one thing better than anyone and that's love her. The same goes for you. I might not always get this parent thing right in fact I know I'll make mistakes but I know how to love you well. No man will ever love you more. That's a promise made and I'll never break it." she pauses grinning down at her daughter before continuing again aloud.
Gratitude, wow…I really have no words other than you proved to me today not only does god exist he loves me. You are his opinion that world is still worthy and should continue.
Chyler what do I say that I haven't already said? Oh well If I've said it I'll say it again, I love you. Loving you is without a doubt the easiest and best decision of my whole life. You always manage to teach me things and surprise the hell out of me. Today, you gave me something I didn't even know I needed until she was here. Thank you. You showed me how strong and brave you are. I'm proud of you. I love you just doesn't seem like enough but it will have to do.
Always,
John and or Daddy
P.s. We are never doing this having a baby in France thing again. It was scary Chyler, promise me never again,"
Chyler burst out laughing waking the baby just as John was returning with coffee.
"What?" He asks looking over at her. "Okay Johnny I promise you don't have to do this again. Thank you though it meant a lot to me that you'd uproot our lives to do this with me."
He shrugs, "It was nice…personal, private, we be parents and have an experience we don't have to share with anyone for awhile. Makes it worth the terror. Sides seeing you curse out the nuns like a truck driver was funny."
"The pain got bad, so sue me." John picks up the baby. "Hi Tater."
"Tater John? Really?"
"She likes it see she's smiling."
"That's gas pains."
"You…you…party pooper."
-/-/-/-
You're small Parisian house is filled to the brim with loud, happy family members. You pass Collier Grey, Chyler's father in the living room door way. Looking at the rugged man you are always reminded of Chyler's southern roots. He wears a khaki pearl snap western shirt, Wranglers, a hand tooled leather belt and ostrich skin boots. "You do know you're in Paris, Right Coll?" You ask.
"Chyler will never change my taste." he grins green eyes shining and you see a bit of Chyler in him.
"Me either. Where is she?"
"Hiding in the bedroom, I just left her."
"Thanks." you clap him on the shoulder and move toward the back of the flat.
You stand shoulder leaned on the door frame and watch her a moment. She's sitting on the bed the baby lay across her lap on her belly as Chyler flips through French Vogue. Her hair tossed up messily. Glasses on her face. A shirt stating: "It isn't my job to blow smoke up your ass…" you grin at that.
"You know I don't think we're supposed to lay the baby on her tummy like that. Vogue any good?"
She looks up at you startled. "Really?" She picks up Tatum quickly. You shrug. "Don't think it really hurts anything since you're right here. Now why you got your nose in Vogue, Who you hiding from?"
"I love our families you know I do but damn, I mean it's the first time I've had her to myself today."
"I know remind me to check their bags before they leave, I think Carly's threat might be real." you crawl into the bed kissing them both in turn. "Oh I get it it's quiet back here. You're smart. Sneaky but smart."
-/-/-/-
You are old and achy again, you look over and Tatum is grown with children of her own. You suddenly feel weary and alone, even with your brood all around you. You miss Chyler. You sink down onto the park bench outside the University hospital you get lost a second staring up at the glass faced ultra modern structure.
Paris climbs into your lap. You wave off Deck's concern and listen to Paris read the placard on the bench. "For women who never give up. Dedicated to Chyler Grey Cena and Dr. Ruby Navarro."
"Was Mom born here?" Ashton asks.
"No she was born at a little clinic run by catholic nuns."
" This is the place you tried to heal Grandie." Tony states sounding so much older than his eighteen years. Then again he gets it the girl he loves has cystic fibrosis. He sits down next you slinging his shaggy hair out of his face. He looks at you so intently you try not to grin. Tony's an intense kid always has been even as a baby he was broody. "Was it worth it? All the things you went through, watching her and knowing pain and death were waiting on her and you couldn't help?"
"It was worth it because without her and all of it I wouldn't be who I am. She made my life. She was my life and it sounds cheesy and maudlin but its true. So, yes it was completely worth it. We both went to the ends of the earth for each other. Is it worth it for you? With Leigha? I bet you already know or wouldn't of asked me. Was it the hardest I've ever done? Without a doubt but it was always worth it."
"I wanted to tell you I got into Berkley. I'm going to major pre med. I want to fix it for them both."
"That's good son, really good. You still need a haircut though." he grins at you letting you know you'd lightened the mood. You miss Chyler keenly then. You know how proud she'd be. You try mightily to push the dark thoughts of how close you'd come to losing her all those years ago when it became to much for her to carry alone.