Chapter 1 - Insomniac Dreams

"What's bothering you, Harry?"

Harry looked up to see Hermione eying him across the table. They were sitting in the Gryffindor common room alone. It must have been very late, the fire in the corner of the room was flickering feebly, casting the room in semi-darkness.

Harry shook his head and returned to staring at his hands.

"Nothing."

"Please, do I really seem that daft?"

Harry grinned and looked back up at her to see she was wearing a concerned look.

"Really, it's nothing important."

Hermione sighed and resumed her Potions essay that was taking up half the table. Ron had given it up as a bad job a while ago and stormed to bed, cursing Slughorn as he went. Harry didn't have the heart to do it.

"I would think that you'd confide a little more in your best friends, Harry."

It was Harry's turn to sigh. It wasn't as if he didn't trust her, quite the opposite really. But it was hard to voice the concern that he was feeling at all times now. It was as if he knew something was going to happen soon, but he didn't know what.

"Well if you're just going to sit there and watch me work you might as well go to bed, it's late."

Harry shook his head again. "I couldn't sleep if I wanted to."

"When was the last time?"

Harry shrugged. "A couple days ago, at least." It was hard to tell, the days were just starting to blur together, as if he was just living one prolonged day.

Hermione rolled up her completed essay and stared at him with a searching look. Harry turned his head away, not bearing to meet her eyes.

"You need to sleep, Harry. You're just making things harder on yourself."

Harry didn't answer her. Maybe it was true, but thinking about the situation seemed to calm him down. Sleeping would just wipe the slate clean.

Hermione stood up across from him.

"I'm going to bed, I'll see you in the morning."

Harry nodded, still not saying anything.

"Well, night, then," she said.

"G'night," Harry grunted.

She gave him one last sweeping look and then headed off the the girls dormitories, brushing his hair as she passed.

Harry leaned back in the chair he was sitting in and rested his head on his fist. He had been extremely detached from everybody for a few months now. He still hadn't told anyone about the prophecy, he and Dumbledore were the only two who knew.

And that night still haunted him.

He tried not to think about it too much, instead attempting to push the memory back into the recesses of his mind, but the attempts were futile. It was a monster that lingered with him wherever he went, and he was sure it would follow him until he died.

He stared into the fire, wishing anyone would pop their head in and offer him words of comfort. But it wouldn't happen anymore, not since...

"Harry!"

Harry stirred in his bed, trying to ignore the voice attempting to wake him. He had been having such a nice dream...

"HARRY!"

He sat bolt upright, his glasses hanging off his nose haphazardly. He recognized that voice, the note of panic in it.

Harry stood up and replaced his glasses on the bride of his nose, glancing at Ron's bed. It was empty.

He grabbed his wand from the bedside table, ran across the room and wrenched the door open. Screams and yells met his ears, and he saw Ron dashing up the stairs to meet him, his wand out.

"Ron! What's happened?"

"Harry. They found us, they're here."

"What are you talking-"

A loud bang echoed up the Burrow's staircase, and a man ran up towards them, draped in a black cloak, pointing his wand at Ron, who yelled.

"NO!"

"Stupefy!"

"Protego!"

Harry was too quick for him, and the force of the Death Eater's rebounded Stunning spell knocked him back down the staircase and out of sight.

"Where is everyone?" Harry asked, as he made his way downstairs, stepping over the unconscious Death Eater, Ron at his heels.

"Outside, fighting. Blimey, they appeared out of nowhere. Someone must have betrayed us, this place is under the Fildelius Charm, Mum and Dad made Sirius secret-keeper because he never left Grimmauld Place, but since he died..."

Ron trailed off, glancing at Harry. He hadn't talked about Sirius's death since it happened.

"It doesn't matter, c'mon."

Harry jumped the last six steps and bolted out of the door to the garden, Ron right behind him.

A horrible sight met his eyes. It was pandemonium. There were at least twenty Death Eaters in masks, dueling every one of the Weasley's, along with members of the Order. Kingsley was dueling three at once, Lupin was right next to them, dueling Dolohov who's mask had fell off, and with a complicated motion of his wand, Lupin crumpled.

"NO!"

Dolohov turned his head to Harry and a sneer stretched across his face.

Harry sent a Stunning spell at him, but he deflected it with a lazy flick of his wand and pointed it as his chest.

"Avada Kedavra!"

Harry ducked and he felt the heat from the Killing Curse graze his neck.

"No! He's the Dark Lord's to finish!"

He recognized the voice of the person behind the mask and hatred rose up his throat. Bellatrix Lestrange shot a Stunning spell at him, but he blocked it. He pointed his wand back at her, intending to commit his first murder, but a hand grasped his upper arm and dragged him in the opposite direction.

"Harry, you need to get out of here!" Ron yelled. He grabbed the Invisibility Cloak that was hanging out of Harry's back pocket and threw it over them both.

"SHE KILLED SIRIUS!"

Harry attempted to wrench free of Ron's grip, but he shoved him back against the wall of the house.

"I know, but he died to save you, and if you die right here, right now, it'll have all been in vain."

Ron grabbed his arm again and made for the entrance to the garden, edging around all the fighters.

Spells still erupted all around him. He was worried for everyone else, and he hoped against all hope that Lupin was okay, that Dolohov's curse hadn't been fatal.

Harry shot shield charms everywhere he could, shielding his companions from further harm, and the Death Eater's looked around around, bewildered at who was stopping them.

Ron stopped unexpectedly and Harry ran straight into him. He turned around and looked up into the face of Dumbledore, who immediately grabbed them both and Disapparated.

He felt as though he were being squeezed from all sides. He couldn't breathe, he had no idea where he was, and all he could feel was Dumbledores firm grip on his arm, and the unrelenting pressure.

His feet finally found solid ground, and his knees buckled from under him. He collapsed on all fours, the Invisibility Cloak slipping off of him, and looked up to see that he had been brought to Dumbledore's study. Ron was hunched over in a corner, retching violently.

"Dumbledore-"

But with a swish of his cloak and a loud crack, he was gone.

Harry jerked awake. He had dozed off, but from the dark sky visible from the window across the room it couldn't have been for long.

He had dreamed about that night again. He always did when he fell asleep, just like when Cedric had died, which was part of the reason he refused to let sleep engulf him.

So much heartbreak had happened that night, and it was all because of him. He, Harry, had been the cause of the deaths of four people he held most dear.

Dumbledore had Apparated back into his study with a delirious Fred and Ginny shortly after he had brought Harry and Ron. He had told them most of the family and Order had escaped safely and were in hiding at Ron's Aunt Muriel's home, for which he himself was secret-keeper.

But he had also brought the terrible news that George, Lupin, Mad-Eye and Mr. Weasley had died fighting.

Thinking back to that shocked moment of silence in the headmaster's study brought a sickening feeling in his stomach and his eyes started to water.

He could never associate himself with them again, not if he wanted them to survive.

The sound of people moving in the dormitories above shook him from his reverie, and he got up to feign like he had a refreshing night's sleep like the rest of them.