Fan Number 61

by a quirky little tune

Sora held the clunky, old-fashioned phone against his ear as he plopped down on his outside porch. The light above him flickered every so often, but Sora had long ago gotten used to its fickleness.

Kairi's slightly fuzzy laughter sounded from the receiver, but Sora sat with a blank look on his face; he was not amused and was, quite frankly, one minute away from hanging up (childish though it may be). Finally, the laughter died down to halting chuckles and the brunet asked snappishly, "Are you finished yet?"

Kairi seemed to try to breath and giggle at the same time, resulting in a rather choked sound. "S-sorry," she gasped, "I-I didn't mean t-to laugh at you, Sora, but this is just too perfect!"

A look of almost insulted disbelief crossed Sora's face. "Perfect?! Out of all my troubles, which part looks even remotely perfect to you?"

Kairi stopped laughing abruptly, clearing her throat slightly to regain her composure. Her tone took on a notable soothing edge, as if pacifying a small child. "Er, nothing. You're right – there's nothing perfect about this situation at all."

Sora pulled his hand out in front of his face to glare suspiciously at the phone, then returned it to his ear and replied, "Why would you say that in the first place, anyway?"

There was a huge pause before Kairi coughed delicately, mentally cursing her inability to lie sincerely. "No reason."

"There's always a reason," the brunet argued insistently. "Seriously, which part of my misery makes things perfect for you?"

"I said for no reason!"

"Yeah, but you're lying!"

Not in the mood to draw out such a childish argument, Kairi abandoned her feeble attempts at deception, rolled her eyes, and sighed loudly. Jittery fingertips tapped against her jaw as she made her lips move. "Oh fine, you infuriating bum! You really want to know?"

"Um… yes."

Sarcasm didn't suit Sora well and Kairi wished they were speaking in the same room so she could hit him upside the head for his attitude.

"Things have come full circle, Sora. I just happen to find it funny that you've finally realized you have feelings for Riku."

Sora turned a faint shade of pink and muttered, "Sure, sure, laugh it up Kairi. You're not the one who has to – wait, what do you mean by 'full circle'?"

There was a long pause on the other line. "N-nothing. I just meant that we…"

Sora's brow furrowed. "'We'…?"

"We all knew about your feelings ever since we were kids and it's just great that you finally realized them yourself!" Kairi blurted out quickly, mentally cursing at herself for letting slip the whole "full circle" thing. It was easy to forget how sharp and intuitive Sora could be sometimes… Riku would kill her if she accidently gave away any more.

The brunet blinked. He was pretty sure that Kairi's answer didn't really fit the term 'full circle' but maybe… Maybe she had just gotten her words mixed up? "Anyway," he said slowly, accepting her odd answer – for now, anyways. A new, more urgent thought came to the forefront of his mind and he bit the inside of his cheek worriedly. "Everyone knew for that long, huh? Was I really that obvious?"

He paused, then gripped the phone tighter. "Am I that obvious?!"

Kairi giggled, part in amusement and part in relief. Intuitive and observant Sora could be (at times)… but he was also quite gullible. "No, you're fine, Sora. We've just known you for a long time, is all."

"But Riku's known me for longer than all of you!" he panicked. "So it stands to reason that he should know, too, right? Holy crap, I'm doomed – utterly, utterly doomed! He's going to beat the stuffing outta me!"

"Calm down, drama queen," Kairi sighed, blowing a few loose strands out of her face. "First off, even if he did know, why would he beat you up for something like that? Are you suggesting that Riku is a bully or a homophobe?"

Sora's frenzy died down immediately. "Ah, no…"

"And," Kairi continued sternly, "if he did know – which he doesn't – and he was prone to beating up gay kids on the island, wouldn't he have attacked you before this?"

"Well, yes, I guess—"

"Do you feel silly now for saying such ridiculous things?"

"… yes, ma'am."

Giggling, Kairi let her tone soften to make sure Sora knew she was sincere about what she would say next. "Trust me, Sora, if Riku knew how you felt about him, he wouldn't be mad or upset or disgusted with you at all. As it is, Riku's got absolutely no clue about your feelings. He's completely oblivious."

Sora chewed on his lower lip thoughtfully. Man, at first he had almost had a heart attack, thinking that Riku could possibly be already aware of Sora's crush. But then, after Kairi's explanation, a wave of something suspiciously like disappointment had washed over him. That had been kinda odd… why would he feel disappointed that Riku was now and would forevermore remain oblivious to Sora's lov—feelings? After all, it was in everyone's best interest, homophobic bully or not, that Riku never find out about any of this.

Er, right?

Blinking, Sora shook his head. Of course it was all for the best! If Riku ever knew about Sora's feelings, then things would get real awkward real fast and their friendship would become strained. And if it was strained and awkward, then it wouldn't be normal and Sora liked it when they were normal (it made him feel content and warm and happy because that was the way things were supposed to be). Sure, a small part of him may want more than that normal relationship, but he knew in the long run that it was certainly not worth the risk to –

"Sora? SORA?"

Kairi's voice successfully jolted him out of his engrossing thoughts and Sora sheepishly laughed at his own absentmindedness. "Hahhhh, sorry, Kairi, I guess I just zoned out!" He was definitely not going to tell her about the part of him that felt depressed that Riku would never know of Sora's true feelings… she would just badger him nonstop about confessing and he would eventually cave in to her prodding and confessing was probably the worst thing Sora could ever think of doing, ever, in the whole wide world (and there were tons of worlds to pick from), period.

"Sora!"

Ah, crud, he had done it again. "Heh… my bad, my bad!"

"Okayyyyy, I get the feeling that this subject is bit too complicated and stressful for you right now. SO, I'm going to be an amazing friend and switch topics for you."

No more talking about Riku? That sounded like the best idea yet. A Riku-free conversation would really help to take Sora's preoccupied mind off the older boy. It was almost ridiculous, actually, how much time Sora spent thinking about his best friend – how those sea-green eyes stayed imprinted in his mind long after seeing Riku, how that smile made him so woozy even if viewed in a memory.

Ick. Was his mind on one track or what?

"Guess what's coming up soon?"

Sora sighed and willed his Riku-thoughts away. Shoo, Riku-thoughts, begone! "What?"

"Riku's birthday!"

"… Kairi."

"Hm?"

"Weren't you supposed to change the subject to a non-Riku related one? Wasn't that the whole point of you saving me from my own thoughts?"

Kairi huffed indignantly. "I said I would change the subject, which was your crush on Riku – I never mentioned that I would not talk about Riku at all. Suck it up, Hikari, because this birthday is something we definitely need to discuss, crushes or no crushes."

"Such compassion," he muttered, kicking up some dirt and weeds. He relented quickly, "Fine, fine. His birthday is three weeks from tomorrow, isn't it?"

"Uh-huh! And since it's the big one-eight, I figure we need to outdo ourselves this year or DIE trying. Don't you agree?"

"That sounds good," Sora said somewhat sulkily, "In theory. Because we both know for the fact that Riku is one of the hardest people to shop for. Even his own mother has a lousy time of it."

"That's true… Plus," Kairi spoke gently, softly, "all the stuff we used to know about Riku might not apply anymore. I mean, we just had a couple of rough years and we all grew from our different experiences. Our friendship is the same, because deep down, we're the same people with the same hearts, but on the outside… well, we should be prepared just in case Riku has different interests than he did before."

Sora digested those words slowly, mulling them over with as much care as he could muster. Kairi raised a good point and Sora knew it. They couldn't just assume that Riku still liked the same things as he did when they were younger. Heck, Sora was definitely not the same immature but well-intentioned kid he had been before their adventures and it would be foolish to pretend that Riku hadn't changed like he had.

He thought he would be upset at that revelation, but Sora couldn't be, not when he hiself had grown so much. Plus – and perhaps this was the optimist in him that spoke now – he couldn't be upset at these changes when they provided so many new opportunities to learn more about the person he care so deeply for.

"You're right," he replied, forgoing Kairi's tentative tone and instead speaking strongly and easily. This wasn't something to worry over or to feel disheartened about. "Even so, if we focus less on the specific materials or genres that Riku used to like and more on his actual personality, I'm sure we can still come up with things he'll enjoy."

Kairi grinned boyishly. "You can be very intuitive when you want to be, Sora," she told him, happy and almost touched by his thoughtful answer. What she had done to end up on such a beautiful island and to gain such wonderful friends, she would never truly know. But she figured she'd feel grateful for the rest of her life. "When should we schedule our shopping trip then?"

"Hmm," Sora mumbled as he closed his eyes and raised a hand to his chin – his usual 'thinking' pose. "Despite our awesome power of friendship awesomeness, I still think we should hold off on the shopping for a bit and see if we can first gather any information on Riku."

"Yeah, I – what? Oh, sorry, wait a second, Sora!" He heard some shuffling on Kairi's end and a muffled shout. Her voice was apologetic as she eventually replied, "Scouting for information sounds like a plan – uh, I'm sorry Sora, but my dad says that I gotta go do my homework—" a pause, an unintelligible growl from Kairi "—and that I shouldn't be talking so long on the phone with boys at this hour."

They both knew that Kairi's father, the mayor, was just teasing them (Sora had never known that men could be teddy bears until he saw the honorable mayor of Destiny Islands fussing over his only daughter). Sora chuckled, Kairi sighed in good-humored exasperation, and they hastily planned to meet tomorrow a bit before homeroom (as Riku loved to crash their homeroom when he could) to further discuss their strategy.

Sora shuffled back inside his house, returned the handheld receiver to its rightful place and made his way up his cramped steps. Having finished his homework earlier in the day, he changed rather lethargically into his pajamas and slid into his bed. The brief respite that Kairi had offered him was gone now and nothing could stop the flow of pure Riku from spilling through his mind.

An image of memory-Riku smiling flashed in his head and, unable to help it, Sora soon fell asleep with a smile on his face to match.

... please don't kill me. I am so so so so sorry about the delay and hope that this chapter will be good enough for you guys. It was the biggest pain in my... well, you know. I had such a rough time with this chapter and look -- I stayed up until three in the morning to finish it for you guys! Surely that redeems me in some way, yes?

Anyway, groveling for forgiveness aside, PLEASE tell me what you think. I'm not even kidding. Let me tell you something, I usually dislike authors who bother their reviewers for reviews. Especially when they threaten to not post or some such thing. I won't ever do that, but all the same, guys -- is it really that difficult or time-consuming to leave me just a bit of feedback or a statement? I once got a review with two words in it and it made me feel giddy for the rest of the day. Giddy, I tell you.

I think you guys sometimes underestimate the effect that your feedback can have on the author. Sometimes, it's not even a matter of what you write, per se, but just the fact that you're letting the author know that SOMEONE is reading his or her stuff and enjoying it. You have more power than you think, haha -- I'm so cheesy, aren't I?

The next chapter will be better, I think, mostly because Riku will be in it again. Hopefully I'm keeping these guys in character, as I seem to have been doing so far (I believe). And last but not least, I really hope you guys are enjoying this story!

Thanks for tuning in,

a quirky little tune