Chapter Fifteen

Meta

Two and a half hours later, I was sitting on the bench next to the school's flagpole as they brought down the old flag, which was ripped to shreds the night before. We had put up a new one as a way to symbolize the strength of the city. It pretty much was a way of saying 'you can try to knock us down, but we will always get up again and fight.' It was a messege to that Harley Quinn lady, though I am sure I was the only person there who knew that. I wondered if the city would be so optimistic if they didn't have the nightly shadows that save them from more despair. Ms. Gordon and her two 'daughters'

had left to go help clean up in other areas on the city, but not before telling me not to run off after this get together was over. I was tempted to ask her where she thought I'd run off to other than my house, but I said nothing, nor did I move other than to sweep the sidewalk as if she hadn't said anything.

I didn't know what would happen next. Other than being curious and scared about what I knew, none of them spoke to me after that. Dinah wanted to.

Boy, did she want to, but she felt that nothing she said to me would help the situation right then, not with her family there, and I felt the same. I thought about the many things I saw in Ms. Gordon, Helena, and Dinah's minds. There was so much grief and guilt that it was hard to think of anything else. Ms. Gordon thought the most, and scenes and images had flooded my head when I was near her. It was hard to believe she was a school teacher by day, and a crime stopping vigilante by night. Helena and Dinah too, but they don't wear masks like Barbara did as Batgirl. It was through her thoughts I learned the most. I knew the truth about how she'd come to care for both Helena and Dinah, and how she'd gotten into her wheelchair. I knew the truth about both Helena and Dinah's mothers, the missing peices that Dinah couldn't tell me. I knew, if only a little bit, about Batman, the three Robins, Batgirl, Black Canary (Dinah's mother), Catwoman (Helena's mother), Joker, and Harley Quinn. I knew all of this simply because Barbara thinks too much. I watched and listened as people started to leave. I helped load the van with cleaning supplies and donated items as something else to do to keep me there a little bit longer. Soon I was one of the only ones left, and I sat at the bench waiting, watching the flag as it waved in the wind, now chilly. I stuffed my hands in my pockets to keep them warm and waited. For what, I didn't really know. It was slowly getting colder, and I could tell it was thinking about snowing again. It had snowed last night, but it wasn't enough to stick. Eventually, I gave up the waiting game and started to walk home, broom over my right shoulder, and dust pan in my left hand.

The Hummer Dinah drove when we went for rides those few times was in front of my house. As I approached, three doors opened, and Helena and Dinah both got out. Despite Ms. Gordon's protests, Dinah got her wheelchair and put it to the driver's side of the vehicle, and my teacher got out of her seat and crawled into the chair. I looked at them as they waited for me to reach them. I at first didn't say anything, but when I realized that a sentance from me was what they were waiting for, I said, "I waited at the school. You told me not to leave."

"I told you she heard you." Helena said in her 'I'm right, you're wrong, admit it, and never argue with me again' tone of voice, looking at Dinah but speaking to Barbara. I nodded. I looked at the door and then back at them.

"Do you want to come inside?" I asked, already knowing the answer. It was cold outside, and us talking about having abilities in the middle of the sidewalk would just be stupid. It was a really awkward moment, in case you couldn't tell. Not everyone can say that their Lit teacher, who is paralyzed from the waist down, was a crime fighter when she wasn't grading half assed essays on A Cider House Rules. Thinking of the wheelchair made me feel dumb because of the stairs in front of the house, but Helena had gently and effortlessly picked up Ms. Gordon as if it was second nature, and gave Dinah a curt nod towards the front door, signalling my ex best friend to move the wheelchair to the top step. I felt Ms. Gordon's annoyance, embaressment, and slight helplessness as she was placed back in her chair. I slowly opened the door and held it for my three guests.

The door had just barely closed when I felt the slight panic again. "Gabby, we need to know whatever it is you know about last night, and more importantly, how you know about it." All three of them stared at me, putting me on the spot. It made it harder to think of a way to tell them.

"I wasn't trying to be a smartass... Well," I smiled sheepishly, "not completely, when I told you it was a long and complicated story. I don't know where to start, but-" I thought about my saved untitled document. "A couple of months ago I was sitting on my couch watching TV when Dinah had come over..." I told them about the static, the dream I had of Helena/Huntress and Dinah's first meeting, and some of the instances where my abilities changed in any way, including my theory that since Dinah was near me when the changes occured, she might have had something to do with my abilities. I left out anything about the Institute, as that did not concern them as far as I saw, and I said nothing about Gina or what happened the night before. Though I didn't lie about anything in my story, I could tell my guests knew I was holding back.

"You heard right," Ms. Gordon said once I was finished, "you are a metahuman like Dinah and Helena." I nodded. I had figured as much when I saw the term in their minds.

"That's it?" I looked over at Dinah, who seemed shocked and somewhat hurt when it seemed that my English teacher was about to launch into a speech or explaination of some sort. "No strapping her to your meta detector that measures nueral whosit-whatsits?"

"My- uh- 'meta detector' got destroyed last night in the fight. Besides Dinah, she probably already knows everything I'm about to tell her, having already seen so much." She looked from Dinah to me. Then she looked back at Dinah. 'I sense a change in you.' I looked down at the table as I heard that thought from Ms. Gordon, perposely directed at me. Was she testing me to see if I really could hear thoughts, or was she concerned about the dramatic change in my attitude lately? 'It feels like you don't care anymore about anything.' I didn't respond in any way, mostly because I didn't know how to.

Maybe I didn't care anymore. I cared a great deal about my parents, and was scared to the core about their disappearance, but they were keeping secrets from me. Secrets the rest of my family was all in on, and I was unsure how I felt. Hell, even late Grandma Cook knew! (And she was right, damn her. She was right about me being queer and she was right about me being like my

father.) I cared about Kelly, my first best friend (that I can remember), but she'd gotten scared of me and of Dinah, and turned her back on me. Dinah too, had gotten scared of herself and left me. So maybe I didn't care...

And maybe Santa Clause is real and it was the dingo that ate my baby. Who the hell was I trying to kid? I can't even fool myself. If I didn't care, then why was I hurting so bad? Exactly. I cared, possibly too much, but who cared about me? Oh, I'm sure they all did at one point, and feel that they did even then, but why must we hurt the ones we care about?

I looked up at Ms. Gordon suddenly. "You don't have to worry about me telling anyone. Who would I tell? Exposing you would mean exposing me, and I just can't do that." Ms. Gordon nodded, surprised at my almost curt manner.

I was tired. Frankly, I wanted them to leave. I wanted to go to my room and wallow in my own self pity and not think about those who just lost everything hours ago. I wanted to cry until I had no more tears left, no more pain to cry over. I knew I would be in that room for a long time, but it didn't matter. With the school slightly destroyed, I had the time.

My three guests remained quiet until Ms. Gordon said, "Then I guess we won't keep you much longer, Gabby. If you have questions..." she trailed off as she searched her pockets for paper. I walked to the where the phone was and took a peice of Precious Moments sticky stationary paper and a pen before walking back to them. "If you have any questions about metahumans or... anything, this is the number to reach me." Oh, I had questions alright. Nothing but. I knew vaguely just about everything that dealt with metahumans and the nightly lifestyle of the women before me, but none of it completely made sense to me.

"I saw something about a- a 'Metahuman Database'." I said slowly, deliberately. Ms. Gordon watched me, as did Dinah and Helena to see what I was going to ask her. "Where do you get the information to form a list like that... or- or can you even tell me?"

"They've been gone long enough that I think I can tell you. Before many people realize they have metahuman strengths, they have hospital records stating that they have unique blood samples that was taken. I took note of the people with 'abnormal' blood, and put them in automatically. If something happens and Helena ran into a metahuman that isn't listed, I would add them as well. My biggest source is from an organization that was destroyed a few years ago that was working on testing metahuman children to study them. There is no real name for this organization, but those who have been there or work there refer to it as the Institute-"

"What?" I didn't meant to say that out loud, and certainly not in that 'you've got to be kidding me' tone of voice.

"Gabby? Do you know about the Institute?" I was still for a moment. 'Do I tell them?' I thought to myself. Dinah looked as if she wanted to grab my arm and tell me it was okay. They already knew about me, knew what I could do, and they knew about the Institute. They might even know how to get to the Bludhaven branch. I nodded slowly, but I felt a wave of fear wash over me. 'What if Barbara wants to talk to my parents about it now?'

"Yeah, I know a- about the Institute. I know because I was taken there as a kid." I shook my head as if to tell them they'll get no more than that from me. How can I tell them what I don't even know?