So here is Edward things are getting a bit crazy for these two. We don't plan to drag the crazy out but stick with us and please please please let us knwo what you think.
SM Owns all things Twilight
I didn't know Jasper well but I was so thankful he was at brunch it took the spot light off of Bella and I for a little while at least. When we got home and said our good buys to everyone I asked Bella to show me her room. I had been in there briefly before but never staying long. Before I could go in to her room I needed a moment to calm down and give myself a little pep talk.
"Bella can you give me a second I just need to um..go to the bathroom I'll be in in a second ok? I spoke softly.
"Oh ya sure." She kissed my cheek before she ducked into her room closing the door behind her.
I walked into the bathroom and closed the door. I turned the cold water on and splashed it over my face recounting the car ride and revelation that Bella had not been taking her birth control very regularly. We had established that we were both pretty confidant neither of us were going to give each other anything…Accept for a fucking person..baby..child..fuck me! I am not an idiot I am normally a very controlled calculating person. I have a fucking 4.0 and I got a fucking 1600 on my SAT! I could feel my heart rate starting to increase as I began to freak out. I knew better the thought of having sex without a condom was appalling to me for reasons that I find a little odd myself but the clean freak in me was completely grossed out at the thought. However with Bella my brain turned off my emotions took over my fucking dick possessed me I was obviously not thinking clearly. Not only had I had sex without a condom but I had done it twice. I hadn't even stopped long enough to ask the fucking 20 million dollar question….."Hey Bella before I fuck you against this door are you on the pill cause I don't really want to be a daddy at 18?" It was a simple question that would have put the moment on pause for all of 10 seconds now my life may be put on pause for 18 years SHIT SHIT SHIT.
I stood up straight and looked at my face in the mirror. My jaw wasn't as swollen any longer but the bruise had spread to just under my eye. I looked like shit. I let my mind wonder back to last night and remembered the way she felt in my arms as we fell asleep and I wanted to do that tonight and every night, but how do I go back in there climb onto her bed and think about having sex with her when she could be pregnant? So I decided the only way to deal with this was to do it head on.
I knocked on her door and waited for her to answer.
"Come in." Her soft voice came through the door.
I opened the door and walked in she was sitting cross legged on the bed with her lap top in front of her. She slowly closed it and looked up at me. She had the brightest smile on her face. I immediately noticed she had on my Forks High track shirt.
"I've been looking for that shirt ya know." I smirked at her. She looked down and began to fidget with the hem of the tattered shirt.
"Oh I uh….I think it got mixed up in the laundry." She said nervously.
"Ah hu I am sure it did." I nodded as I moved to sit next to her on her bed.
"Bella"
"Edward"
We both spoke at the same time.
"Please go ahead" I smiled
"No you first" She insisted. I sat there chanting BE A FUCKING MAN YOU PRICK! In my head before I spoke.
"Well first I wanted to tell you how sorry I am that I didn't ask you first about the birth control and I am so fucking sorry I didn't put on a condom. I know better Bella and now you could be you know and that means we would have a you know and that would just be really fucking fucked up right?" Well that hadn't come out exactly how I wanted it to. "Look what I am trying to say here is when was your last period?" Fuck..Shit I am an idiot. She sat there with a blank look on her face. The silence was killing me. "Bella I'm sorry that's not what I wanted to say God I am not good at this. I mean let's think about how possible it could be I mean maybe it's a long shot."
"Two weeks" She said it so quietly I almost didn't catch it.
"Two weeks? That's good right I mean that means you would have like two weeks or something before your next so the likely hood of you getting pregnant is pretty low right?" I almost had myself convinced that the bullshit I was saying might actually be right.
"No it's not. This is exactly when you wouldn't want to have sex without a condom if you know what I mean."
"Fuck"
"Ya fuck is right. Look let's not worry until we have something to worry about alright there isn't anything we can do about it right now any way." She was being entirely to calm about this.
"Edward from now on we use a condom. I probably shouldn't have blurted all that stuff out in the car. I will try not to worry if you will?" She placed her hand on my thigh and in spite of all the condom talk and baby shit all I could think about was ripping her pants off of her.
"Isabella if you don't move your hand off my thigh I'm not sure I will continue to think straight." She began to move her hand up my thigh slowly with a devilish grin on her face.
"So don't" She smiled as she moved to her knees and onto my lap. She straddled my lap and began placing small wet kisses up my neck until she reached my ear.
"Mmm Edward I have waited a long time to be able to do this." She whispered into my ear and then she grounder her body into mine. I let out a low growl that I didn't recognize and grasped her hips tightly. I immediately loosened my grip.
"Sorry I didn't hurt you did I?" I whispered all of a sudden feeling very self conscious of how inexperienced I really was. She pulled on my hands placing them back on her hips.
"I liked that" she whispered. I began to breath fast and all kinds of things began to run through my head. What if I wasn't any good what if I disappointed her? Last night had been so hurried and rushed so raw and fast that I hadn't given myself time to think about it. Would she compare me to the douche from down under or what about Mike fucking Newton or what about any other asshole that had been with my Bella? I mean I don't care that she had more experience than me but I was feeling pretty fucking inadequate at the moment. I began to panic and that's when she noticed. She pulled back and began to slide off my lap.
"Um Edward what's wrong did I do something wrong?" She began to tug at the shirt to pull it further down her legs. She was trying to cover herself and hide from me.
"No..No God no it's just that…..I mean it's me I'm not very good at this. I guess I don't have much experience and I really don't want to disappoint you." I lowered my head not wanting to see the disappointment in her eyes. I waited for her to say something. When she didn't I began speaking again.
"I totally fuck everything up and I'm sorry." I said still not wanting to meet her eyes. I felt the bed shake before I heard the giggling she was laughing at me. I felt her small hand on my cheek.
"Edward look at me please." She spoke softly as she nudge me to meet her brown eyes.
"I like that you don't have a lot of experience I like that you are a little nervous. I like you touching me the way you do. Edward I want you, we will figure it all out together." She was now on her knees looking down at me as she ran her fingers through my hair. I moved so I was standing on my knees as well.
"Bella I'm a pretty fast learner if you tell me what you like and want I promise I will give you my very best." I wiggled my eye brows at her trying to lighten the mood.
I had watched my fair share of porn and I knew the how too of all of it but really knowing when and where she wanted it that is what worried me. I wanted to know all her favorite things I wanted to know how hard to touch push and pull and how soft to be and how to know the difference of when to do what. I was an impatient asshole and I wanted to know it all now. I wanted to give Bella mind altering earth moving sex that made her unable to walk straight. The problem is I had no finesse as of right now. I knew who I could talk to about it but did I really want to go through all of this with him?
"Make love to me Edward." She began pulling up my shirt and discarding it on the floor she slipped the Forks High track shirt off as well and I lowered her to the bed. She opened her legs as I kneeled between them. Without much thought I leaned down and drew one of her hard tight nipples into my mouth. She arched her back and she let out a soft moan. I smiled against the warm flesh and she giggled a bit. I let my hands roam down her sides until I found the thin purple lace of her panties. I hooked my thumbs into the sides and she lifted a bit so I could pull them down her milky white legs. As I tossed them to the floor she sat up and began work on my jeans. Once she freed me of them and I kicked them onto the floor she looked up at me with the biggest smile on her face.
"Top drawer" she smiled. Yes dipshit don't forget the condom yet again. I reached over and pulled a small foil packet from the open box. I pushed all thoughts away of why the box was already open and moved back over to Bella. She took the packet form me and opened it. I watched in awe as she grasped the base of my painfully hard dick and rolled the thin material down. She reached up and pulled me down to her.
"Just go slow take your time like last time" She encourage. I had been so confident last night and now I felt unsure of my every move. I am sure it was because I thought I would never do this exact thing again. I nodded as I pushed into her. Fuck she was tighter than I remembered she was warm and wet and perfect.
"Oh my god Bella you're so soft." It was the only thing I could get to come out. I couldn't think of one romantic profound thing. I set a slow steady pace. Bella began to move her hips up to meet mine driving me deeper into her. I felt her legs wrap around me and she held me tight to her so I could barely move inside her. I rocked us sending a warm hot feeling to me stomach. I palmed one breast while I drew slow circles with my tongue on the other. Bella fisted my hair and pulled just a bit sending another shot of pleasure right down my spine. Fuck do I like to have my hair pulled?
Working on instinct alone I sat up just a bit so I could look at Bella beneath me. She let her hands run up and down my sides as I began to move more quickly as the pleasure built.
"Ugh Edward don't stop just like that" Bella moaned
Then the most amazing and unbelievable thing happened. Bella reached between us and began drawing quick tight circles on her clit in time with my movements.
"HOLY SHIT BELLA! I OH FUCK ….I!"
"Yes Edward YES YES YES!"
Her eyes snapped open and her mouth formed a perfect O as I thrust into her as deeply as I could go. I pulsed filling the condom and instantly began to feel weak. Bella flopped her hand above her head while caressing my face with her other hand.
"Was that OK?" I asked knowing that is was fan fucking tastick for me.
"Mmmhmmm very. Was it for you?" she said in a soft sleepy voice.
I pulled out of her discarding the condom in the trash and cuddled up next to her pulling the blanket at the end of her bed over both of us.
"Bella I was inside of you there isn't anything better than that." I whispered into her ear. Her breathing evened out and I sat for at least an hour watching her sleep before I drifted off to sleep myself.
"Edward…Edward." I soft angelic voice echoed in my head and it came with a warm breath that smelled like mint.
"Edward you have class in 20 you have to wake up." I felt the bed shift and then warm hands were running up and down my back scratching softly.
"mmmmm no" I opened one eye and found Bella's face right next to mine. I slowly pushed my mouth into the pillow because morning breath is just not attractive and it was obvious Bella had already brushed. She giggled at my response.
"Edward get up and go to class and I'll take a nap with you after lunch." She wiggled her eye brows at me and I was instantly awake.
I kissed her forehead before I darted to the door to grab a quick shower before running to class literally. "I'm holding you to that!" I said as I opened the door. I turned around and ran smack into Alice sending both of us to the floor.
"EW EW EW! Edward get the fuck off your fucking naked get off EWWWW!" She was screeching. In my haste to get to the shower I had completely forgot I was naked and now I was lying on top of my sister that is just fucked up.
"Oh shit fuck Ali I'm sorry OH GOD! I hurried to get up just as Jasper came around the corner.
"Alice what's the….." He stopped dead in his tracks. I looked at him and for the life of me I was not sure why I was still standing in the hall now Bella was at her bedroom door.
"Edward shower!" She prodded me as a towel hit my head. I pulled the towel down and covered up my junk and just did the guy nod thing we do to say hi without words. I went into the bathroom and closed the door. No sooner had the lock clicked I heard all three of them burst out laughing. Smooth Eddie real fucking smooth. I showered quickly and tossed on some gym shorts and a t-shirt and pulled my sweatshirt on as I ran the 4 blocks to campus and straight to class. It did not dawn on me until I walked in that this was Bio and Jane would be here. I saw her sitting in our normal place and I immediately went straight to the back of the room as quietly as possible. Every once in a while I would see Jane trying to look over her shoulder at me but we never made eye contact. I rushed to get out of class as soon as it was over.
The next two weeks went by just like that me running to class having stayed in bed too long with Bella. Some nights we slept in her room and others we slept in my room. Either way I always remembered to put on shorts before leaving the fucking room. It took three days for Alice to quit giving me gagging noises when she would pass me in the hall.
"Edward will you carry my bags down for me?" Alice yelled from her room. I ran up the stairs and found Alice dragging her biggest suitcase to the top of the stairs.
"Shit Alice we are going home not to Europe and for only five days."
"Don't fuck with me today Edward!" Ah PMS I love having a sister and I love that we are twins but one drawback is we know each other too well she really only got like this when she was PMSing.
"Don't get testy." I smirked knowing I was I only pissing her off further.
"Edward so help me…..I have cramps that could kill a fucking horse Jasper won't be getting to mom and dad's for two days and I have had no coffee." She was speaking through clinched teeth.
"Hey by the way a little sisterly advise….Bella might be a little bitchy this week too if you know what I mean." She whispered
"How the fuck do you know that?" I almost screamed.
"Edward when girls live together they get on the same page if you catch my drift." Oh….Oh…OH FUCK! I picked up her bad and went down the stairs without saying a word.
"Isabella!" I yelled a bit harsher than I intended. With all the sex and sleeping and fucking togetherness I had managed to put the entire pregnancy thing out of my mind.
"WHAT! EDWARD!" She yelled as she came into her room.
"Did you start?" I blurted out. She slowly closed the door behind her.
"No not yet, but don't start freaking out. We can freak out after Thanksgiving break if I still haven't ok." She was fidgeting with her hands and I knew she was nervous but trying to hold it together for us both. I walked over to her and pulled her into my arms.
"I'm sorry I'm not being much help. I just totally forgot about it and then Alice was a bitch and she mentioned that you guys are on the same you know and I just flipped. I'm sorry."
"It's ok I mean I haven't given it much thought and my boobs hurt so I should start soon."
"Your boobs hurt? "Now I was just confused.
"Yes before they get kind of sore but that's also a sign of…." She trailed off and I knew exactly what she was going to say.
"Look we leave in like two hours let's get the car packed and not worry until we have to ok." I kissed her lips and she nodded moving toward her bag that was on the floor. I picked it up and went to load all our shit into my car.
We were spending the Thanksgiving holiday with my parents Emmett and Rose would be there when we got there having flown in yesterday and driving straight there. Jasper had some work to finish up and would be coming over on Wednesday. He didn't want to fly home to Texas for such a short trip and his parents were fine so long as he came home for Christmas. Before long we were on the road. We put Alice in the back so she could sleep and not bitch the entire way since she was a little less than pleasant to be around at this point. Bella and I held hands most of the way and if we weren't my hand was on her knee or hers was on my thigh.
My mom met us in the driveway as we pulled in. Emmett and Rose along with my dad came out as we piled out of the car.
"Emmett, Carlisle help Edward with the bags." My mother directed. They came around pulling shit out of my trunk.
"Holy shit Mary Alice what the fuck did you pack?" Emmett boomed.
"Emmett watch your mouth young man." My mom scolded.
"Sorry mom but did you see this fu…this bag?" He grumbled all the way into the house.
"Edward put Bella's things in her old room it is ready for her. Emmett and Rose are in his room Jasper will be in the blue guest room at the end of the hall." Wait why do Rose and Emmett get to share a room?
"Don't give me that look Edward Bella's parents would have a heart attack if I let you guys share a bed under my roof and your father would kill Jasper so let's just leave it alone shall we?"
"What about Rose and Emmett what makes them so special?"
"Edward they live together and might I remind you Rose doesn't have parents to piss off. Emmett and us is all she has." My mother spoke softly. I am a childish dick. My mother was right after Rose's parents died in a car accident Emmett and her senior year we were all she had that was part of the reason Emmett went away to school with her. We all knew that one day they would get married but my parents really wanted them to both finish school first one thing at a time and all that shit. I nodded to my mother as I moved into the house.
Late Wednesday night Jasper drove in and was greeted by a much happier Alice. It had not gone unnoticed that the tour Alice had taken Jasper on of the house had taken a bit too long. I tried not to think about the fact A. That was my sister and B. I knew she was on her fucking period I mean were you allowed to do shit when a girl was on her period?
Here we sat in the living room with a football game on and the sound of Emmett snoring away on the couch. The dinner my mother had prepared was amazing but it usually was. Esme went all out for holidays. Bella jumped in and helped saying she had not cooked a turkey since her last Thanksgiving with us and wanted to learn how. She spent most of the day in the kitchen with my mom but about an hour before dinner was ready she said she wasn't feeling well and went to lay down for a bit. She was quiet through most of dinner. I helped everyone clear the plates and was roped into doing dishes with Emmett and that is when he gave me the look.
2 hours earlier
"So?" Emmett nudged me as I rinsed a plate.
"So what?" I asked trying to avoid what I knew he was asking.
"Come on Edward you know what. The car ride do you know if she is? I still can't believe after all the shit I have said to you…"
"Alright DAD! No we don't know anything yet. I do know that she has felt like shit today and her boobs hurt but that's about it." He just stood there loading dishes shaking his fucking head.
"Listen you know I'll be there for you man but mom and dad are going to flip their shit if you make them grandparents." He was getting a bit animated.
"Would you keep your fucking voice down? I know this alright I don't need any lectures I fucked up I get it but we are not going to freak out until we need to and besides if anyone is going to have my fucking kids it's going to be Bella anyway."
"Are you saying you want her to be pregnant?"
"No asshole that is not what I am saying. What I am saying is I don't plan to have children with anyone ells except Bella so it could be worse like we could be having this fucked up discussion about Jane."
"Edward you didn't use a fucking glove with her either!" He was missing the entire point I was trying to make.
"Emmett leave it alone. Yes for your information both times I used a condom with Jane alright." I dried my hands and walked away.
Present
I finally kicked off my shoes and put my feet up on the table with my arm around Bella as we watched the game. I heard a soft low whimper from Bella and looked down at her. She was holding her stomach and had a horrible grimace on her face.
"Bella baby are you ok?" I whispered knowing she would not want any attention drawn to her.
"Mmm ya I think I just…..excuse me." She got up and went up stairs without looking at anyone. I waited for a few minutes and went to check on her.
I went into her room and when I didn't see her I noticed the light coming from under her bathroom door. I knocked softly.
"Bella baby are you…..are you ok?" I waited and nothing then I heard soft crying.
"Bella honey answer me what's wrong?" Still more silence.
"Isabella if you don't answer I'm coming in." Nice Edward how very caveman of you.
"C…..C…Can you g…get R…R….Rose?" She said softly through her sobs.
I walked as calmly as I could into the living room and asked Rose to come up stairs with me. I knew Alice was watching my every move and when I reached Bella's door Alice was right behind me.
"Listen something is wrong with Bella and she is asking for Rose." Rose nodded at me.
"Ali stay with Edward I'll be right back out." She knocked softly on the bathroom door.
"Bella honey it's Rose can I come in?" A soft ya came from the other side of the door. Rose opened the door and slipped in and the door shut again. I sunk onto the bed with my head in my hands. My knees were bouncing and I was a wreck.
"Edward what's going on?" Alice sat next to me rubbing slow circles on my back.
"I…I…I think Bella might be pregnant and now she has locked herself in the bathroom and she is crying and I don't know what's wrong." She stopped rubbing my back and just then the bathroom door opened.
"Alice go get Emmett and tell him to get the car warmed up have the heat on high. Try not to alert your parents." She took charge and Alice didn't ask questions as she disappeared out of the room. I stood and moved toward Rose I was done waiting outside I passed Rose and found Bella on the floor. She was pale and then I noticed the blood lots and lots of blood in the toilet. HOLY SHIT!
I dropped to my knees and pulled Bella into my arms. She began to sob.
"What's happening?" I asked I mean I didn't know if she had started her period or….or if what I think was happening was really happening. Soon I felt to hands on my shoulders and then Rose's soft voice.
"Edward we think she is having a miscarriage it she is having a lot of cramping and this is just not normal for starting your period and Bella says it's not normally like this. I will take her to an urgent care clinic."
"NO!" I interrupted "I'll take her" I was kissing the top of her head as she began to sob again.
"Edward how about WE take her? Emmett is warming up the car she seems a bit cold." Alice appeared in the door way just then.
"Emmett has the car running should I get dad?"
"NO!" Bella yelled.
"No thanks Alice I really don't think Bella wants dad looking at her like this." I explained.
"Oh um Ok well mom and dad are both out taking a walk so they don't know what's up."
"The car is ready what's going o….?" Emmett stopped dead in his tracks when her rounded the corner and found the scene in the bathroom.
"Holy shit Baby B! Edward pick her up let's go now!"
Without another word I scooped up Bella she felt frail and week in my arms I am sure from the sudden loss of blood. Rose wrapped a blanket around her and we left. Alice and Jasper would stay behind and run interference with the parents.
Bella wanted Rose to go in with her and I tried not to feel hurt and left out. I mean if she was having a miscarriage it was my baby. I wasn't sure I knew how to feel about all of this should I feel relieved? Should I be sad? It was confusing.
"Dude she will be ok Rosie will take good care of her." Emmett tried to ease the tension that was clearly written all over my face.
"I should be the one in there with her." I said softly.
"Rose will take care of her and dude she doesn't want her new boyfriend to watch her get a pelvic exam and trust me you don't want to see that either….Don't ask." He said the last part in a flat voice.
We sat there for what felt like four hours but when I looked at my watch it had only been 30 minutes. Finally Rose came out.
"She is asking for you." Rose sat down next to Emmett after kissing my temple as I stood. She squeezed my hand and it was obvious that she had been crying….fuck.
I knocked on the door and opened it as I walked in I found Bella sitting on the exam table. She was still in her exam gown and she looked scared to death. I walked forward and wrapped her in my arms.
"it's gone…it's common…we don't have to worry." She sniffed into my chest.
"Shh baby its ok everything is going to be ok…..Bella I love you it's going to be ok." I didn't know what ells I could say. She basically just told me she had been pregnant and had a miscarriage and I had no fucking clue what to say to her so I just held her as she sobbed into my chest. I felt tears sting my eyes but I still had no clue how I was feeling.